Praying to get problems

[Vort]

A few years ago, President Eyring told of how, as a younger man, he had told the Lord in prayer that he was ready to be tested, and as a result found himself in a situation that brought him to his knees and almost (I'm paraphrasing from memory here) overwhelmed him. But he was glad for that trial, because as he looked back on it, it was a fairly minor trial, one he could easily overcome now that he has become so much stronger. He seemed (to me, at least) to be advocating for us to pray to the Lord for trials to grow and strengthen us.

 

President Eyring is not the first I have heard suggest this. If I went rooting around lds.org for a while, I could probably come up with more examples. I have certainly heard local leaders and acquaintances saying the same sort of thing.

 

To my naive, simple, and undisciplined mind, asking the Lord for trials seems like praying for your children to get rabies. Why would I do such a thing? Is my life so error-free and boring that I need to ask God to spice it up for me a little? Or am I so unable to learn from ordinary life experiences that I need to explicitly request something really awful or especially challenging -- for my own good, of course? That seems like madness.

 

But I am not convinced it really is madness. The fact that President Eyring and others have taught (or at least seem to have taught) this principle makes me wonder if it is not, in fact, a true principle.

 

So what of it? Do any of you pray for trials? When they come, do you thank God for them? Anyone care to shed some light on this scary-sounding principle for me?

[erog84]

This topic in my opinion is kind of hard to pin point because if you take one stance, it is almost the opposite effect.  My initial thought is, Pres. Eyring should be thankful his circumstances were so nice that he had to ASK for a tougher life.  But if you then think about the eternity of things, having an "easier" life may not allow him to jump start his eternal progression as much as being tested more thoroughly.  Personally I have enough problems all around me that I don't need to go ask for more.  Seems a bit crazy to me to ASK for more, but I haven't walked in his shoes and don't know what his life circumstances were at the time.

[David13]

I suppose Pres Eyring was a kid once and did things kids do.  Like ask for trouble.

But many people do things that are challenges.  I ride a motorcycle.  And always look for longer trips. 

Others may sky dive, learn to be a pilot, etc. 

Anything that may be a real challenge to them.

The theory is that they find life too tame otherwise.

The thrill.  The challenge.  The test, trial, etc.

I can see it.

dc

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

Vort, just pray for humility...it's basically the same thing. You will be given trials to make you humble. (I mean you in a general sense.) I am speaking from personal experience. Years ago I prayed to be more humble and all hell broke loose after that.

I have more than enough trials without asking for any more. Yes, I have grown from them, but I would never ask for more.

I don't think Pres. Erying was saying that we should ask for trials. The way I understood him was that our trials when they come can make us stronger. That is a true principle.

[cdowis]

"Heavenly Father, I have gotten thru this very difficult situation, so please help me to learn the lessons that I need to learn."  

[JojoBag]

 

 

So what of it? Do any of you pray for trials?

 

NO!  I don't need to pray for trials.  It seems I do a good enough job on my own without asking God for more.

[beefche]

Can anyone recall someone in the scriptures asking for trials? The only one that comes to mind (and it isn't a perfect example) was Job. 

 

I'm with you on this, Vort. I remember that talk as well and felt spiritually immature because I couldn't imagine (and still can't) ever asking God to bring it on. It almost smacks of pride. But then I think that I must be thinking wrong because I don't believe that any of the apostles are prideful. 

[Crypto]

I prayed for trials when I was in high school. I wouldn't recommend doing it, they will come, time from them may diminish the struggle, but such a trial they were. (excuse the mismatch grammar, proper grammar didn't seem to catch the intent. Though rephrasing might have.) Though I can say that it is through our trials that we go through the refiners fire. (Or at least one way that we can) I am thankful for all that I have learned and grown in ways I don't know if I would have known otherwise....can't say I was thankful for the trials though.

Rather than ask for trials I suggest asking for his guidance for growth, and plenty of help to make sure you get through them trials!

Edited October 24, 2015 by Crypto

[The Folk Prophet]

I believe all prayers should be that the Lord's will be done. Asking for random trials doesn't seem to fit. Asking to draw nearer to him or learn what is required to that end does fit. Pray for the Lord's will, and honestly be determined to accept whatever His will is.

[Anddenex]

As pertaining to this thought from my mind's eye I do not think President Eyring was advocating such a process.  As LP specified, when first on my mission MTC, I prayed that the Lord would bless me with humility and I will never say such a prayer again -- never!

 

Now my prayers are, when life brings trials may I be blessed with the willingness to exercise humility and patience as they come -- and unfortunately, I am still a failure even at that.

 

What I would suggest President Eyring is more advocating comes from his book "To Draw Closer to God," and in this book he suggests that every faithful LDS should ask God "What lack I yet." Listen. Act.  

 

Elder Bednar, and others appear to have this same teaching.  It is our duty to discover the will of God and then act in accordance with his will.

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

 

What I would suggest President Eyring is more advocating comes from his book "To Draw Closer to God," and in this book he suggests that every faithful LDS should ask God "What lack I yet." Listen. Act.  

 

Elder Bednar, and others appear to have this same teaching.  It is our duty to discover the will of God and then act in accordance with his will.

 

Yes!  "What lack I yet?"  I started doing that years ago, inspired by a Relief Society lesson.  It's one of the best decisions I have made in my life.  One of my most sacred spiritual experiences came from doing that.  Of course, that is also where the counsel to be more humble came from (yikes! LOL).  Though that has been hard, I wouldn't trade what I have learned.

 

Thanks for mentioning Elder Eyring's book...I had an opportunity to read an excerpt of another book of his and I really enjoyed it.  I was thinking of reading more of his writing.

[Guest]

The only thing I can think of is a much more spiritual version of this.

[cdowis]

Hallelujah! My prayer was answered.

 

My daughter moved into our home with her three small children. And, no, I don't want to talk about it.

[Traveler]

In this one thing - I am sort of similar to Jesus.  When it comes to trials my prayers are always to have them removed and yet I will "SUFFER" trough them if it is G-d's will.  But then I find myself pleading for assistance with every step.  And then have completed a particular trial I will from time to time include in my prayers that others that I know - should get to learn some of my same lessons - I guess I am a bit sadistic that way.

[Guest]

My mission president once told us that we need to be thankful for everything.  "Even if your day didn't go so well, be thankful.  Hey, thanks for a rotten day, Lord." (laughter).  But he really did mean it.  

 

When I posted that Brad Paisley song, I meant it.  Just like Brad saw the gems of imperfection in his life and in his relationships, we need to see the precious jewels that trials really are.  

 

Pres. Eyring heard Pres. Kimball give a talk in 1979 that inspired him to ask that prayer.  It was shortly thereafter when he was called to the Presiding Bishopric.  

 

I know that I need to be stronger.  I also know that I need to be humbled.  If I'm eager for those results, I should be praying for more trials.  I know that the Lord will not give me more than I can handle.  And I know that whatever happens, it will be for my good, and the Son of Man hath descended below us all, and I am not greater than He.

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

 I should be praying for more trials.  I know that the Lord will not give me more than I can handle.  And I know that whatever happens, it will be for my good, and the Son of Man hath descended below us all, and I am not greater than He.

 

Reading your post sparked my curiosity.  Maybe the answer to the question of whether or not we should pray for trials is different for different individuals.   I remember Elder Holland saying once that he really hadn't had any difficult trials (sorry I don't remember which talk he said this in.)  I was fascinated by that idea because we all need trials to grow don't we?   It raises the question (the one we can't answer fully in this life) of why some people have so many more trials than others.   

 

Please don't take this wrong, I mean no offense, but is your life really so untroubled that you have to ask for trials?  I seriously can't imagine that.  There is much that is wonderful about my life (my husband and children mainly), but my life has been very difficult.  My patriarchal blessing warned me "you will have many trials and tribulations for this life is not easy".  And we know the Lord does not exaggerate.   

 

I thought everyone's blessing said something like that until I shared that with a friend who said, "your blessing says THAT" in great surprise.  Since then I ask people sometimes and no one else so far has that phrase in their blessing.  I take it as a comfort that the Lord knew what would unfold in my life and He was reminding me that it would be okay.

 

So anyway, I guess if you live a relatively untroubled life, you could ask for trials.  The rest of us will just pray that we will be able to endure to the end.  :)  

[Guest]

Mine actually says something like:  

        You will experience many hardships in your life.  But through it all, remember that the Lord is over all. 

 

It goes on to say:

        Through your experiences you will develop the traits of character required for you to perform your mission...

[Crypto]

Mine actually says something like:  

        You will experience many hardships in your life.  But through it all, remember that the Lord is over all. 

 

It goes on to say:

        Through your experiences you will develop the traits of character required for you to perform your mission...

 

  My patriarchal blessing warned me "you will have many trials and tribulations for this life is not easy".  And we know the Lord does not exaggerate.   

Mine says something along similar lines, though different.

[Guest]

but is your life really so untroubled that you have to ask for trials?  I seriously can't imagine that.

Actually, I haven't ever asked for trials.  I was simply making the argument for why it would be reasonable.  

 

I've had several major trials that brought me to my knees in prayer and in the figurative emotional sense. And I had a premonition that a couple were coming.

 

But most of my life I have these piddly little difficulties that I complain about immensely until something slaps me around and says: Do you see Joe?  Do you want his trial?

 

No.  

 

Then I tend to feel much better about my life and realize how thankful I should be.  Many people I know have daily trials that I don't know how I would handle them.  But they endure.  And they sometimes thrive.  They make me stand in awe.

 

Yet, when I consider that I still lack certain traits for what I believe to be my mission, I know I need to go through a few more crucibles.  I'm a little scared to ask for them.  But I am a little scared knowing that they will come anyway.  I just need to have faith that it will be for my good.

Edited October 26, 2015 by Guest

[The Folk Prophet]

I've always figured the best way to avoid some trials is to humble yourself before the trial comes along to humble you. Don't know how much validity there is to that. But...

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

Mine says something along similar lines, though different.

 

Thanks for sharing.  Because of the personal nature of Patriarchal blessings, I'm reluctant to ask people about this, but I am ever curious.  

 

 

Actually, I haven't ever asked for trials.  I was simply making the argument for why it would be reasonable.  

 

I've had several major trials that brought me to my knees in prayer and in the figurative emotional sense. And I had a premonition that a couple were coming.

 

I hope I didn't put you on the spot, I didn't mean to.  I was just trying to understand why a person would even consider asking for trials.  It's hard for me to wrap my mind around the idea.  

 

This discussion reminded me of a favorite song/youtube video. (I'll share the link at the end of this post) I love this because I have felt the way this woman feels.  I'm not there now thank goodness, but I still find it very powerful.  This song is from the Broadway show, Next to Normal.  I think her husband is a gem, but he is hurting too. Which brought a new question to my mind...

 

If you ask the Lord for a trial, aren't you asking for those closest to you to have a trial as well?  

 

I can't think of any "bring your to your knees" trials that would not affect the people closest to you.  What if the trial was cancer?  Whether you are the one who gets cancer or it is your spouse or child, all of you will be effected.  

 

Any serious trial I can think of: physical health, financial, death, mental illness....all of these things will not only affect you, but your spouse and children.  The bigger the trial, the bigger the ripple of its effects.

 

So I wonder, knowing that your trial will almost certainly affect those around you, would you ask for a trial?

 

I think it is better to follow the counsel from our recent General Conference and ask the Lord, "What lack I yet?"  That question shows our humility and desire to serve Him and to improve ourselves without asking for challenges.  

 

BTW, even though Next to Normal is my favorite musical, be warned it has a lot of F-bombs.  There are no F-bombs in this song, or I wouldn't share it here, but the d-word is used.  Also, the couple's son comes in at the end of the song...I would explain that but it would be a spoiler. 

 

 

https://youtu.be/yx9z1Fdz1j8

Edited October 27, 2015 by LiterateParakeet

[Guest]

I hope I didn't put you on the spot, I didn't mean to.  I was just trying to understand why a person would even consider asking for trials.  It's hard for me to wrap my mind around the idea.  

 

Nope.  No apology necessary.  I didn't feel on the spot.  I was just clarifying.  The point is that I don't welcome trials themselves because the tend to be unpleasant.  But when they come, the hope I have is that when it's over, I will be better for it.  Because of this principle, I understand why someone much further along spiritually than I am would ask for trials.

 

If you ask the Lord for a trial, aren't you asking for those closest to you to have a trial as well?  

 

That is a good point.  But as I look back on the trials I've had, they've affected my wife -- not as much as me.  They have only had minor effects on my children.  And again, it is better for all of us.

 

When we're through the trials, I can bear testimony to my wife and children of the cleansing and strengthening nature of adversity.  They can feel the Spirit in the achievement of endurance.  To quote Rocky "How hard can you get hit and keep going?"

 

I hope they can really feel the spirit of what I've gone through so they can learn from my weaknesses becoming strengths so that 1) They may be spared from having to learn those lessons the hard way, and 2) They may understand the truth of the divine nature of trials so that as they become tried in their lives, they will know where to look for hope.

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

The point is that I don't welcome trials themselves because the tend to be unpleasant.  But when they come, the hope I have is that when it's over, I will be better for it.  Because of this principle, I understand why someone much further along spiritually than I am would ask for trials.

 

Thanks for discussing this with me.  I agree that the Lord can use our trials to strengthen us, but I don't think that we should ask for trials.  At the beginning of the thread, I was trying to keep an open mind to that possibility, if not for me, for some people.  Through the discussion though, I've made up my mind.  It's just not a good idea.  I don't think it's about how far along we are spiritually.  

_______

 

After I started writing this comment, I decided it would be helpful to read the talk that was referenced in the OP, since Elder Eyring is clearly farther along on the spiritual path than I am.

 

I should have done that sooner.  :)   Because he answered my question...the question we all are asking . . .

 

One of the keys to an enduring faith is to judge correctly the curing time required. That is why I was unwise to pray so soon in my life for higher mountains to climb and greater tests.

 

Pres. Eyring Mountains to Climb      https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/mountains-to-climb?lang=eng

 

 

I love that he also said this (in the same talk): 

 

If we have faith in Jesus Christ, the hardest as well as the easiest times in life can be a blessing.

 

 

So if you find yourself in the "easy times', I say rejoice!  

[Guest]

I'd call attention to:

 

 

...so soon in my life...

 

And this is a man who would soon be called to the Presiding Bishopric.

 

I don't think it would be wise for most of us either.

[Guest]

Faramir has often said that he would rather push himself to growth (by actively developing talents, or stretching himself to do uncomfortable things that work toward his betterment, or taking calculated risks that might look crazy to some but are necessary for his professional goals, etc.) than to be pushed into growth because he's been complacent. I think there's wisdom in that, but then we've also been walking through a long and blistering refiner's fire as a couple and family because of some of those calculated risks, so. . .