Tyler90AZ

Your are correct, that is something I absolutely would not want, I go to church to be uplifted by the beautiful doctrine this church has. I don't go to church to learn about history, that is not as uplifting in some cases, as the doctrine. I want to be uplifted in all my classes, nothing perceived to be controversial.

The history of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is no worse then any other religion. Instead of people getting angry at us for Mountain Meadows, they should applaud us for never starting a war, like most other religions. People should not get angry at us for polygamy, that is our doctrine, whereas some other religions are hypocrites. People should not get angry at us for anything a Prophet says, as it is less controversial then actual events that have happened in other religions. People should not get angry at us for not allowing blacks to hold the Priesthood, because we actually actively fought against slavery, whereas most other religions did not. People should not get angry at us for missionary work, because we are one of the only churches who truly lives up to our obligation to share the gospel, as stated in the Bible. People should not get angry at us when they find small things wrong with our church history, as we are one of the only religions to keep such a detailed account of history. To sum up, instead of attacking The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for our history, it may be wise to compare religions, you may be surprised that we actually are a bright spot in religion compared to others. With that in mind, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints history is nothing to be ashamed. What about the pioneers who so valiantly came to SLC? What about the saints who faced the extermination order? What about the saints who built the SLC Temple? What about Joseph Smith, who face persecution for starting this wonderful church? What about all members who have faced persecution? What about the many great cities the Saints have pioneered? What about all the Temples around the world? What about all the missionaries who have served for the Lord? What about the translating of The Book of Mormon? What about all the charity our church has done? What about the fact our church was against slavery? I could go on and on, the point is, that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has far more bright spots, then dim spots. We should not look down on our church for making mistakes it is part of having humans participate, it is unavoidable.

She makes a lot of good points. I also want to point out somebody who falls out does not automatically have mental health problems. I lost my whole family, life and was accused of metal health problems just because I said I don't believe anymore. Despite my hardest efforts to the opposite, God has pulled me back in the fold and I can not deny this work. Although the church does not condone this behavior; I have seen nothing to discourage it in the two years I have been a member from the Apostles or Prophet. However, I hope that will change.

You just gave yourself better advice then anyone will give!

Whatever you do, do not take his free will. I was in a questioning phase which probably would have been a few weeks. However, the in-laws felt the need to destroy my life over it. It took me three months to even desire a testimony again. Off course when I rejoined the church a week later I got my life back. I think it was a few extreme members, not church policy.

Too much good stuff to choose from!!

I agree with Dahlia....If a show is 98% educational and 2% sex I am watching it.... As adults we should be able to watch stuff like that without reenacting the scene. I also struggle greatly with eliminating rated r movies, as they are the best ones.

Well I have it set up where we can be out of here within 24 hours, with nothing significant lost. However, I am going to give this situation one more try, for my wife and schooling. If it gets significantly better I don't ever see us moving from Az, to Utah at the most. If it sorta gets better I will wait until next semester to move. If it doesn't get better, I will move quickly. My new game plan: Thanks to enlightenment from God I have come up with this plan. I call it the overly sympathetic plan. I will have sympathy for her situation, maybe her life isn't the way she wants it. Therefore, she has to control my life. Maybe she is depressed or something worse. Every time she does something against my marriage or children, I will think to myself she has problems in her life, therefore, wants to make mine heck. This plan will help me be slow to anger, since I feel bad for her. I think it is not only a good strategy, but the truth. What a blessing!

Red wine researcher said to falsify data – - CNN.com Blogs

No, not at all what I was trying to do. I was wondering if that counsel is good counsel for MIL, as I believe some lds forum members are MILs. I was also looking what I could do to be a good sil. I am not worried about how she feels about me, I am concerned how she is jeopardizing my marriage and children's health. I am basically trying to figure out if her actions are appropriate as a mil and mine as a sil. Also if she visits this site maybe she will take heed to the counsel.

How can I be a good son in-law? What should I do? How can parents be good mother-in-law and father-in-law? The proclamation also gives this counsel: “Extended families should lend support when needed.” The most successful in-law relationships allow married children to receive and parents to offer spiritual, emotional, or even financial support as needed, but must not limit the children’s ability to act in their own fundamental roles as husband, wife, or parent. The role of the extended family in any marital relationship is to offer “support when needed” and not to give unwanted direction. Building Good In-Law Relationships - Ensign Mar. 2000 - ensign Does that counsel hold true?

Bishop: rameumpton Counselors: traveler, hijolly Clerk: Loudmouth_Mormon Exec Sec: mormonmusic EQ Pres: HPGL: John doe Primary Pres: vort Primary Music Leader: skippy RS Pres: Pam Sunday School Pres: suzie YM Pres: FunkyTown YW Pres: annewandering Chair Specialist: Tyler90az

Thank you for all the great advice! In the end, I think we both need to do a little bit of changing, and I am willing to do that. I just hope she is willing, actions speak louder then words. If she would just give me respect, me and my wife would stay in Arizona forever and she would have her grand kids. I just want respect for my position as father, husband and a human being. Me and my wife are doing great so respect us, we will be together regardless. It is just getting that through her head that is the hard part. It is time for us to be aside our own selfishness....

I don't mean to use this forum as a sounding board, but I have no one else to talk too.

No agreement they just bought it, may have been willed, idk. Their new thing is that I married her for money... I try to stay out of financial things between them and my wife, even know I have seen shady behavior. I also know they are not doing it to be charitable, they bought it to rent girls rooms and for my wife. However, they bought it in the worst possible market, I have never told them that though. They could not get any girls to rent rooms and now every other house in the neighborhood is trying to rent. My family has also told me that they are using it to control me and her also... I guess it boils down to I want my wife to want to move, not just have to move because I want to. If you knew my wife and mil you would understand why she doesn't stand up. It is sad her other daughters stand up to her, but my wife won't. I have to stand up for my wife a lot in fact. I understand this is her first daughter to get married and she can't let go, but she needs to.......She also thinks my daughter is hers the way she tells us what to do and she craves my daughter. That is what she said anyway.... I will say I am not perfect and I am working very hard to just ignore, ignore and ignore. However, it is one of the hardest things I am having to learn.

I know and my wife said she would move anywhere with me at anytime. However, I know she won't be as happy living away from her family. I also have empathy for them regarding their finances. They bought this house for my wife to live in...... That is why she does not want to move also, because she feels like she owes her parents. I was not married to her when they bought there house. However, it is still hard for me to say, screw you, after they bought it for her. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying I am paying near what it is worth, but I am still paying something.

Yea, it is a mil and wife issue.... I tell my wife all the time and we are on sorta the same page. However, how I want my wife to address it is different then how she does. She just wants me to tolerate with it and when the MIL leave we change everything back to how we do it. That causes problems though for my daughters. They need consistency, period. I am going to be honest, it is to the point now where I have lost my cool and belittled my MIL. Much like she has done to me..... I have tried telling my wife to talk to her, talking to my mil respectively and nothing works. It is very hard not to cross the line when nothing changes....... If things don't change, when I graduate from school, we are going fly away. I don't want that though, I like Arizona, I just don't like the way I am treated. I give, give and give.... I have even bore a testimony about the FIL, to make amends for things I said about him. They don't think they have done anything wrong, they want me to kiss their butt, sadly that's not me.

Were living in a house they own, however, we are paying for the house. I am giving her like 2k in "back rent"(another issue). We could easily move in feb, but my wife says they are having financial problems and my wife does not want to leave. If my mother-in-law would just respect me then it is a win- win for both me and her. I don't consider it living with her if I am paying for the house.

The reason I ask on here is because I get a slew of different answers. I also am not claiming to be perfect and have made mistakes with the situation also. It is hard not to judge when I am being judged on a constant basis. It is also hard to forgive when a new wound gets opened every time we encounter each other. I am trying to deal with a mother-in-law that has lied about me on a constant basis. She has said I have five different mental disorders and none stick. It is in order to save her image, she worships her image(imo). She doesn't realize that when you join the army and exit the army they do a mental evaluation. I tell her I may have anxiety because I worry a little too much imo, she basically has talked me into admitting I have something. I have took all the tests and researched it, but it does not seem like I actually have anxiety. However, I don't want to stop saying it, so she might stay off my back. I am even willing to get another evaluation, if she does also. She analyzed me and I analyzed her.......... She has no professional training and I have no professional training, therefore, the opinions are worth about the same piece of trash. Another issue is that she always wants to tell me what to do with my daughters. I take her advice when it is good. However, she continues to push her position, causing a divide between me and my wife. Even disobeying mine and my wives decision on a constant basis. Then she gets mad when I tell her what she should do with my kid. She tells me well when she watches her she will do what she wants. It costs constant tension between me and my wife, because she never gives up. Yet another issue is that me and my wife want to move away from AZ someday. Every time I mention a place we might move she tears it down like it is crap. Then my wife gets all negative about it. Bother the mother-in-law and father-in-law ask on a constant basis where we will move. I fear they will break our marriage up if I do not say somewhere around Arizona. Since me and my wife have been back together everything has been great. The only time we fight is when my mother-in-law is around. I feel sadly she is like a cancer. What should I do?

No, a person pulled into the fold, because he needs to do proxy work for his ancestors. The ancestors have been waiting and are deserving enough they just need a proxy. The reason I ask is because I know my Great Grandpa was a very spiritual man. He was in a Christian religion that believed in tongues, his strongest desire was to speak in tongues. He was serving God the way he knew how, with all his heart. I feel that is why I have been pulled in and re pulled in.

It is important to note not all missionaries are alike. The missionaries that taught and baptized me were extremely laid back, they never once asked me to get baptized. I am thankful everyday that they were not pushy, if they would have been pushy the first lesson I probably would not have been responsive. Maybe if you are scorned by these missionaries too much, you can wait for the next cycle of missionaries to come through. I understand how they could be pushy though, they love this gospel and want to share it. Can you blame them really? I would be concerned if they did not want you to get baptized. Their desire to have you baptized should show you how great their testimony is. Don't be offended by the strength of their testimony, rather let it serve as a strong witness that this is the true church. I like you, became friends with "my" missionaries too, they were great guys. They were some of the only people in the church I knew, they were somewhat of a security blanket. This was one of the sources of my concern prior to being baptized. I wavered back and forth, the adversary tempted me and that was one of his tools. However, once I got baptized, a great feeling came over me. I felt the love of God and of all the saints. I now know I was feeling what it was like to be a fellow citizen with the saints. I was not a missionary(sadly), but I know some of what your going through. The best place to ask questions is right here, if the missionaries can't answer them.

Interested in learning! How are prayers changing the will of the lord, if when we pray we are only requesting blessings that God has for us? It seems to me if prayer is just to request blessings the lord has stored for us, it is not changing his will. It is in my mind more aligning with the will of the lord. That is why prayer is so important it aligns us with the will of the lord. It also is a better reason why prayers don't give you exactly what you want, they are not in alignment with God. Although I believe God being all loving, will still bless us for praying to him, even if they are not in perfect alignment with his will. As long as you are praying for righteous "things." Sorry to drift off topic! Traveler, your post interested me and want to see what you have to say about the above. Anybody can answer...

Sometimes you might be tempted to think as I did from time to time in my youth: “The way things are going, the world’s going to be over with. The end of the world is going to come before I get to where I should be.” Not so! You can look forward to doing it right—getting married, having a family, seeing your children and grandchildren, maybe even great-grandchildren. President Packer I consider that to be a valuable revelation to us. What do you think? You know more about the gospel, so I would like your opinion. Was he speaking for himself or the Lord?

I am looking for a talk that covers the idea of somebody being pulled into the fold, in order to perform ordinances for their dead ancestors. Any ideas?

I just want to give him props, for listening to the spirit and giving us a wonderful First Presidency message.