classylady

156-87=? First of all, I can't figure it out in my head. I have to write it down on paper. I could estimate in my head to get an approximate answer, but I don't trust that estimation, so I write it down to figure it out. 156 - 87 ------ I borrow from the 5 to make the 6, 16. The 5 then becomes 4. Then minus 7 from 16 which is 9 Then I borrow from the 1 to make the 4, 14. Then 14 minus 8 equals 6. So, the answer is 69. Math has never come naturally to me. I struggle with it. But, I can eventually figure it out. To me, if I know the formula, and I can plug in the numbers, then it is just like a puzzle in figuring out the answer. And, I love puzzles!

I had to laugh to myself when I read this. When I visited my son's ward in Kent, WA, I was appalled at my grandchildren's behavior (6 of them). They were very unruly! The twins would run around in Sacrament Meeting. Of course, my son comes from Utah, so maybe that's the reason? But, my DIL is from Mississippi, so I blame her. Lol. I've visited quite a few wards in NV, CA, WA, and UT. I've also been in wards in Germany and South Korea. I see similarities with the Saints wherever I go. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. I'm grateful for the concept of Ward family. Just like I get along with some of my own siblings better than others, that's the same way I see the Ward family. I'm closer to some of my Ward family than I am to other members. I have never had a problem with members being unfriendly in any ward I've attended. I certainly have never taken it personally if I wasn't promptly welcomed. I know that I myself have not always been the first one to greet newcomers. It takes me quite awhile to gather up the courage to introduce myself and welcome people. So, if it takes awhile before people come to talk to me in a new ward, I don't hold it against them. I'm the same way. But, I do know that once they get to know me, or me them, a friendship can develop.

I would take full custody of any of my grandchildren if I could see their parent/s (including my own blood family) were being neglectful. The reason we have not sought for custody is because I don't want to take him away from his father. I want my grandson with his father. But, when my grandson has a medical condition that requires surgery, has dental decay with full on abcesses and pain, then I feel like it's time we stepped in and helped beyond having an open door for both my grandson and his father. My husband and I have very little income, so that is also a factor. I don't have the money to step in and help with the medical issues or the dental problems. I was thinking that if we did have guardianship then we might be able to get State health and dental insurance for him. I just wish his father would get the insurance so these issues can be taken care of. And, I don't understand why he hasn't gotten the help for his son that is needed. The very few school clothes I've been able to buy for my grandson are inadequate, and frankly, I don't see how that will change if we have guardianship of my grandson. The only way I would want guardianship is if we talk to my grandson's father, and he is willing for us to take him. I do not want a legal battle. I don't want my grandson to feel like he is being forced away from his father. And, I hate to say this, but I feel like one of the big reasons his father has not just abdicated the care of our grandson to us, is because of the Social Security check he receives for his son. It isn't a large amount, approximately $250, but it has been the only income he has the majority of the time. He can keep the check. We have maintained a very good relationship with my grandson's father. In fact, the father says he feels like we are more his family than his own. He and our grandson have lived with us a majority of the time over the years, and our grandson has also lived with us without his dad, while his dad was living on his own. His own family has pretty much disowned him and don't include him or my grandson in a lot of their family activities any longer. Because of our good relationship, we could talk with him and request the guardianship. And, it's the only way I would do this. If the father refuses, then we would go on as we always have. But, I would still have concerns over my grandson's safety in a home where marijuana is present, where it is illegal in the State we live in. And, I'm concerned that DCFS will be called by the girlfriend's ex, and my grandson would be caught in the middle of it all. Most likely, if the children are taken out of the home, my grandson would be released pretty quickly, and hopefully wouldn't be too traumatic. I'm just in a quandary about how far to take this. I suppose we can ask for the guardianship, and if he says no, then it's no. But, if he says yes, then hopefully we can get the medical care our grandson needs. When I'm dead and I meet my daughter, I believe I will be asked to give an accountability of my actions in regards to her son. If I saw a need and I did not step in and help, I truly believe that my daughter will not be pleased in that regard. That's the reason for the open door policy for grandson and his father with our home. I also believe I should not step in and take my grandson away from his father unless it becomes necessary to do so. The father will also one day meet my daughter on the other side of the veil and will need to account for his actions. I want to do the right thing. Both, for my grandson and his father.

Yes. Very true. But, unfortunately that rarely happens. If we do happen to see them out mowing the lawn, and we are outside at the same time, we might go over and say "hi". But, that's maybe once or twice a year at the most, and only with neighbors who are within easy distance. There are many acquaintances that I haven't seen since the ward splits, but yet we used to know what was going on with their family's lives. When talking with the neighbors after a split, they mention the "invisible wall" scenario as well. It is sad.

We've lived in the same house for the past 27 years. Our ward has been split about 5 times. My husband and I were able to weather the splits without too much difficulty, but it was very hard on any teenagers we had at the time. For some reason, the kids seem to pair up with other kids in the same ward, so when the divisions came, they were often separated from their friends. I know that people who live outside of Utah may not understand this phenomena, but kids here often form friendships with the kids in the same ward, and when the ward splits, the friendship often goes too. And, something that is also very Utah--when the ward division was down the middle of our street, all of a sudden, we didn't know what was happening with our neighbors anymore. It's like there was an invisible wall down the middle of the street. This has more to do with the fact a lot of our socializing is with the ward.

I don't discount the help medical marijuana can give people. And, I believe that she is careful about the usage and keeps it out of the way of the children. My concern is that it is still illegal here in Utah. I don't know where she is getting her marijuana from. Are there going to be "druggies" trying to get their stash? (They don't mix with the best of people). Her ex husband has been trying to get custody of their children for a long time. I can see him reading that post and thinking that's the perfect way to get his kids away from his ex. I don't want my grandson caught up in some DCFS crisis where the children are taken out of the home. Which, can happen here in Utah. I admit that my family and I have wondered if we should try to get custody of our grandson for a long long time. This has more to do with the way his father seems to neglect him. Grandson has needed dental care, surgery on his leg, and other health concerns and his father does nothing to get help for his son. It's always "I'm waiting to get insurance". Well, I say, "get insurance then". Most of the clothing my grandson has was purchased by me or other members of my family. Last year, one of his teachers actually bought some clothing for him. I just don't know how far I should go. I'm willing to keep my grandson's father in his life, even if we do receive custody of him. I don't want to sever that father/son bond. But, my grandson does look to my husband and me as his 2nd parents. He calls us Mom and Dad, even though he knows we are his grandparents. We are the stable factor in his life. He has probably lived with us the majority of his life, more than he has lived with his father.

Marijuana is illegal here in Utah. My grandson lives 10 minutes from my home. We have a good relationship with the dad. I have made sure we have had a good relationship. My grandson has lived with us a good portion of his life. He pretty much has lived with us every summer since he started school, and off-and-on, he and his dad have lived in our home when their finances were tight. Also, my husband and I have always had him on the weekends. He was just telling us at the beginning of the school year that he wants to live with us, but that's mainly because there is a bully in the apartment complex where he lives.

To give a little back ground, my twelve-year-old grandson lives with his father, his father's girlfriend, and her four children. My grandson's mother (my daughter) died in a car accident when he was 2 months old. I am friends on face book with both my grandson's father and his girlfriend., Last night I was reading a post by the girlfriend who went into a long rant about marijuana not being legalized for medicinal purposes here in Utah. She has a number of health issues including Lupus, Sjogrens, and Fibromyalgia, so she is in a lot of pain and never feels well. Anyway, she mentioned that she was doing her own "clinical trial" and has found that marijuana is helping her tremendously. Here in Utah, marijuana is not legalized for medicinal purposes. My concern is for the safety for my grandson. I don't know where she is obtaining her supply. She has an ex husband that wants custody of their children. I think that if he read that same post, he may use this information to get custody. And, my grandson could be caught up in the middle. Do you think I have the right as a grandparent to get my grandson out of a home where marijuana is being used on a regular basis? I'm just not sure how I should go about doing this. I assume my husband and I should contact an attorney? Or, should I just talk to my grandson's father and say "we want our grandson out of there"? I want it legal, where my husband and I have legal guardianship and not just some half-notion agreement between the father and us. Any ideas? What would you do?

I'll do whatever I'm asked to do. Missionary work, family history, raising children, teaching, cleaning, temple work, etc. Whatever the Lord wants me to do, that's what I'll be doing.

I personally have experienced ADC several times. I have only shared them with family members.

The past few years I've started to shop yard sales. I have saved a lot of money, and I'm surprised at what I've been able to find. I have also learned that just because it's a good bargain, doesn't mean I need to buy it. I only buy items that I want/need. I love to travel. And that can add up to a lot of money. Some people think that travel is frivolous. For me, it is important! Besides reading, it's about the only way I can put everything behind me and actually mentally and physically relax. I start to go a little crazy if I can't get some travel time in on occasion. Because, it's important to me, I have learned to save money just for my travel needs. ! love visiting the National Parks. So, when the kids were young, we would do a lot of camping (which can be expensive if you're not careful), and visit the Parks. I would carefully save money every month for our vacation/s for the year. And, then I wouldn't touch that money. It was only for travel. Now that we're older I still try to get to a National Park or something similar once a year. My husband is officially a Senior Citizen this year, so, we bought the Senior pass to the Parks. That is going to save us a bucket load of money! Our vacations changed drastically after I started working for a major airline. Since our flights were free we started to travel internationally. Most people would be uncomfortable with our tight budget when we travel. We search for very inexpensive places to sleep. And, we have even slept in airport waiting areas. Most of the hotels in Europe offer breakfast. So we would fill up on breakfast, have a few snacks like granola bars for lunch, and then go back to our hotel and make our own sandwiches for dinner. It has been so much fun!

Hey, Eowyn, I just drove past your neck-of-the-woods yesterday. I thought of you. A friend and I drove straight through from Kent, WA back to Utah. It exhausted me. I'm not cut out for these 14 to 15 hour drives with only stopping for gas/food and potty breaks anymore. I'm getting too old for it.

I'm the step mom to two children who lived with their dad, not their bio mom. So, I'm the one who basically raised them from the ages of 2 and 4. I didn't have access to the internet back when I was raising them like I do now. I have done extensive reading lately on raising step children. I wish I knew then what I know now. I probably did everything wrong. I was the disciplinarian, which can be a big no-no between step parent and child. What I did right, was that I loved them. Anyways, the best thing mom and step dad can do is let the child know they love him. My step daughter has confided in me that she wishes we would have been more open, such as allowing her to talk more about her bio mom. We didn't disallow her talking about her bio mom, but it was a touchy subject, so she probably felt she couldn't talk about her mom. So she bottled things up inside instead of talking about them. I wish I had known this. I would have tried to get her to open up more. But, then again, as a teenager, she probably would have resisted any effort on my part or her dads. Teenagers can be so touchy. I believe mom needs to be open about the past, talk about why the son is here with her now, let him know how glad she is that he's here, and tell him that she loves him on a regular basis. It may not solve anything, but it will go a long ways in helping him come to grips about his life.

I need a laugh button!

None of us are perfect. None of us. And by that statement, I qualify it by saying that we often fall short of doing our best. Even with strong testimonies of the Gospel, knowing who our Savior is, knowing the commandments, and trying to be good decent people, we most likely are not doing our absolute best. That is why we have a Savior. At the end of the day, as we look over our behavior, and see where there could be a lot of improvement, that is when we get down on our knees and pray for forgiveness and a resolve to do better tomorrow and in the future. I feel that as long as we are progressing and trying to improve, we are doing what the Lord wants of us.

I did not know this. Learn something new every day.

If you don't mind an older movie I love "Monty Python and the Holy Grail".

I never quite know what to say to those who clearly have mental problems. I'm sorry to say that I try to avoid them. Whenever I do happen to engage in a conversation I try to keep it short and I avoid anything contentious. My daughter-in-law's father is on the fringes of society. He is unable to keep a job. He once was a member of the church, and still believes, but he has such extreme views that he is almost laughable. He once called his daughter evil for dating. (And, that's not the only time he has called her such things). He will occasionally be sane, but more often than not he's way out there. He did bring his ex-wife into the church, and by that deed his daughter was born into a home where the gospel was available. My dil is a wonderful, stalwart member of the church. For that, I am grateful to this man.

The Jordan River Temple is the temple where my husband and I were sealed. 30 plus years goes by fast. It seems forever ago, but yet just yesterday. I'm looking forward to see the renovations.

Probably the last board game I played was CandyLand with my two young granddaughters. Windseeker, I haven't heard of a single one of those board games you listed. I must really be out-of-the-loop. Mordorbund, I enjoy playing both Bananagrams and Scrabble. Maybe, because I always win?

PBS ran the show here in Utah a number of years back. I really enjoyed it.

Some of the topics they are talking about this year sound really interesting.

The news reports are now popping up on Facebook. There's quite a lot of negative comments under the news reports.

Interesting side note to this. When my husband and I were in South Korea last month, he decided he wanted to see if he could find a ham radio to buy over there. Hubby was hoping it might be less expensive. We went into the electronics district in Seoul, but almost no one even knew what ham radio was. There was one shop owner who had heard of it. The shop owner said that the radios are very expensive to purchase in Korea. Our son-in-law, who is Korean, had never heard of Ham or Amateur Radio.