classylady

There have been times in my life, because of lack of finances, often ate food that was long, long, beyond their expiration date. I wholeheartedly asked Heavenly Father to bless that food that it would nourish and strengthen us. I appreciated all the home canned foods that we had, but many were canned years ago from my mother or other family members and given to us. It was a blessing that we had them, and I do believe that Heavenly Father can help food to be healthy for us. Now, with believing that He can help food be nourishing, I do not ask Him to nourish and strengthen our bodies when praying over a table full of sweets. I’ll simply ask for the refreshments to be blessed.

I just watched the video. Thanks for sharing. When I read the scriptures I try to have the spirit with me, and I can often see the temple references. But, I wonder how much I miss? For me, I see the benefit in reading them over and over again, (same as attending the temple over and over), I learn something new each time.

I questioned whether I should share an experience I had during my mission that I feel exemplifies the ministering of angels. And, I feel like the Spirit is letting me know it’s okay to share. There was a point on my mission where I was grieving deeply over a matter that had occurred while on my mission. I was nearly inconsolable and felt so alone. One afternoon, while my companion and I were home for lunch, I went into the bedroom and knelt down at the side of my bed and began praying. I poured out my feelings of despair and grief, crying for relief, and letting Heavenly Father know I needed to be comforted. At that moment I literally felt someone’s arms encircle my shoulders, lovingly holding me. I knew it was an angel, but I was not blessed with the knowledge of who it was that was comforting me. I have always wondered if it was my deceased father, who had died in an accident when I was six years old. I have felt him at certain times in my life. Or, it could possibly have been a grandparent, or other deceased member of my family. Whenever I think of this experience, it still brings me comfort.

Resurrecting this thread. Last year I planted a couple of watermelon plants and I got a few small watermelons off of them. The plants died after I did some vigorous weeding around them. This year, I only planted one watermelon plant. We will see how it grows. I’m not optimistic. So far, this May and June, I have purchased 4 watermelons from several grocery stores, and one from a roadside stand. Every single one of them has been almost inedible. I am so disappointed! No taste or sweetness to them. What’s everybody’s secret for picking out a good watermelon?

I wonder if honest tact is an innate talent/gift? I suppose it could be learned. I think one of my “gifts” might be tact because I have a hard time saying anything to anyone that would hurt their feelings in any way. It’s just not my nature. I try really hard to treat others the way I want to be treated, with kindness and respect. I don’t think I lie when giving people tactful feedback. I can’t say I’ve never hurt someone’s feelings, and when I have, I feel guilty and terrible about it for ages. I can still remember telling a neighbor girl in Young Women’s back in high school that “it isn’t any of your business” when she asked me a question that I now no longer can remember. (I think she asked me if I had a boyfriend, but I’m not sure.) I certainly remember my rude reply. And, I still feel terrible about it. I’ve tried very hard to never say anything like that ever again. There are ways to tell someone if an outfit isn’t right for their body type without being rude and implying they are fat, skinny, boxy, wrong coloring, or whatever their problem area may be. It’s tricky, for sure, especially if they have directly asked for your opinion.

Whenever I go to Germany I always come home with lots of chocolate. I give the chocolate bars away as gifts. Just got back from Germany/Switzerland/Austria/Liechtenstein on April 23rd, and have given away most of my chocolate bars. My favorite is milk chocolate with strawberry yogurt. When you buy chocolate bars with nuts, it’s hazelnuts that are used, not peanuts. One of my favorite brands is Ritter Sport, but I usually buy the less expensive store brands to bring back as gifts, such as the Aldi or Lidl stores. We went into a Lindt (Lindor) Chocolate shop while there and bought some interesting truffle chocolate flavors that I’ve never seen here in the States. Some of the flavors that I remember are chocolate mint, raspberries & cream, strawberry cream, blood orange, Sakura, caramel, white chocolate, pistachio, sea salt, and a lot of other flavors that I don’t remember. It was fun to pick out the ones that sounded good. The blood orange milk chocolate was one of my favorites.

I was introduced to “Asterix” while on my mission in Germany around 1976\77. My experience has been reading them in German. I was just in Germany last month and found two new editions. Now, my German is so rusty I’m having a hard time reading them! But, I’m persevering. I figure it will help me with the language. I’m so tempted to buy the books in English, but I will not give in.

My grandson was diagnosed as a child with Asperger’s, but now it’s called the autism spectrum. He is high-functioning, but he has anxiety, which at times can be severe. He was at college last year, but his anxiety and difficulty with dealing with the social environment (roommates), he came back home. He overeats, and it’s like he has no concept of feeling full or knowing when to stop eating. I have to hide certain foods from him. He has a hard time with delaying gratification, such as saving money for something in the future, or just paying his bills. Most people wouldn’t have any idea he is on the spectrum when they first meet him. It’s after they have been around him for awhile that they begin to notice his quirks, such as not understanding personal space, etc.

In my younger years as a parent, I remember thinking “why can’t those parents keep their children quiet, or keep them in their seats during Sacrament meeting? My children are able to sit still and be quiet.” I was definitely being judgmental. Then, when my daughter died in a car accident, her two-month old son survived but with a brain injury, (I wonder if it contributed to him being on the autism spectrum?), we pretty much raised him. We would be sitting in Sacrament meeting, and he would suddenly get up and dart up onto the stand. He was a handful. I simply wasn’t prepared as a parent, even though I had raised 7 other children before him, to know how to deal with his behavior, or how to discipline or incentivize him to behave. He’s 20 now, and I still flounder with knowing how to help him flourish. He’s very high functioning, brilliant in areas of language skills, but has an eating disorder and other quirks. I feel like I have failed him as a parent. Anyhow, I’m a little more understanding of children who misbehave. Though, I do admit I find it hard to condone parents who blatantly just sit there and let their children be disruptive.

We have lived in our same house in northern Utah County for 36 years and have been in 4 different wards and back and forth to a couple of those wards. Our street seems to be the dividing line when the wards get split or realigned. The small community we moved into has really grown.

I’m hoping I can find a wood carved nativity from Oberammergau this trip that won’t break my budget. Most are too expensive for me.

Some of my hobbies: Puzzles of all kinds—Crosswords, Cryptograms, Sudoku, Jigsaw, etc. I go through a lot of variety puzzle books. Music. Love to listen to most genres. Lately, I’ve been listening a lot to oldies, Nancy Sinatra, Joan Baez, Arlo Guthrie, Mamas & Papas, Doobies, Led Zepplin, ZZ Top. Piano. My arthritis is limiting my amount of play time. Crocheting. Again arthritis is limiting how much I can do. Travel. I’m a retired airline employee so have flight benefits the rest of my life. I’m planning a trip to Germany/Austria/Liechtenstein for April. My younger sister asked me to be her tour guide for this trip. Reading. I belong to a neighborhood book club which gets me reading genres I typically don’t read. Other interests include sewing, baking, my grandchildren, camping, and digitizing family photos. I’m also writing a history of my dad for the family. I collect pens and pencils and other office supplies, nativities, snow globes, angels, nutcrackers (the German soldier kind), and souvenir spoons from everywhere I travel, Edit: I have my Ham Radio license and monitor and listen daily to certain local repeaters.

I agree with Vort’s understanding. Most scriptural references of angelic visitations are to the prophets or leaders, which in my mind would be a Priesthood assignment. However, when I read many of my family history events, or have talked to those who have had angelic visitors, many of the angelic visitors are female—usually a deceased family member.

No matter what decisions will be made as towards adoption, I’m sure you and your family are a positive influence in her life. With your family, she is perhaps experiencing for the first time, what a functional family is like. Sometimes, doing the right thing, the Christ-like thing, isn’t the easiest way to go. There are times when we help others, it feels like it backfires on us. That is sort of what happened to my son when he and his wife took in the daughter of a friend of theirs. They fostered her for about a year. She was 14 at the time and really had some self-destructive issues. She influenced their own 15 year-old daughter to start some self-destructive habits, such as self-cutting, and put a lot of doubts in her head about the church, or any religion. Their daughter is now 19, and is now totally inactive. I don’t put all the blame on the foster daughter, but she didn’t help the situation. Anyway, I don’t mean to be a Debbie-downer, but just be prayerful in all your decisions and follow the spirit as it leads you, which knowing you, you are already doing. I hope this becomes a positive experience for you and your family.

Plural marriage can be a hard concept to emotionally understand. I believe that most of us, men and women, prefer exclusivity with their spouse. I can understand the second wife’s hesitation. When I married my husband, who had been previously sealed to his ex-wife, I too had questions and doubts whether to be sealed to him. I had to push my pride aside and humble myself. I absolutely believe in the ordinance of marriage sealing. I wanted an eternal marriage, and I wanted my children to have the blessings of the sealing covenant. My testimony of this being the Lord’s church is what helped me with my decision to be sealed to my husband. He did try to have his sealing cancelled to his ex-wife, but it was denied at that time. He was told it wasn’t necessary. So, even though I chose to be sealed to him, I still had questions and insecurities that would surface from time to time. Fast forward about twenty-five years. We had heard that it was easier for men (and women) to receive sealing cancellations. In the past, sealing cancellations were almost never granted unless the ex-wife was getting remarried and wanted to be sealed to her new husband. But, because of the information we had received about it being easier, my husband went to our bishop to ask about a sealing cancellation and the bishop asked him, “Why have you waited so long?” Once the letter to the First Presidency was sent in, it took about two to three weeks to get the reply back. The sealing cancellation was approved. My husband’s ex-wife has remarried, but not in the temple. She is no longer in the church, so maybe, that was why it was approved? I’m actually surprised that the request from the man in the letter was not approved, for I have heard of many sealing cancellations being granted where the ex-wife has not remarried. We don’t know the complete circumstances in this instance.

With a family of 7 kids we really drank a lot of milk. I had access to free goats milk and would mix it with the whole milk hoping the kids wouldn’t notice. They noticed! Didn’t like it!

I’m not an accomplished pianist by any means, but I love playing the piano. I guess I would consider myself an advanced intermediate player. I had lessons as a kid and young teenager, but didn’t practice like I should have until I found music I loved. I then pretty much taught myself. For me, Clare De Lune is beautiful. I find it very calming and relaxing. It sounds deceptively simple. And, I can play it on the piano, but I found it to be a bit more difficult than what I anticipated, and never became as proficient with it as I wanted. It’s one of the songs that helped me get back into the piano after about a 14 year hiatus from the piano. (My oldest daughter played the piano beautifully, but after her death at 19 years of age, I couldn’t bring myself to touch a piano. When I could start playing again, I was playing about 2 to 3 hours a day, just trying to get my skills back. Plus it is my emotional outlet.) I haven’t played Clare De Lune for several years. I think I’ll pull the music out and try it again. Maybe I can improve my level of skill with it. And I’ll pull out my music for Midnight Sonata too.

Also, keep in mind that children age 8 and older, who have died, do have their temple work done by proxy. That would be baptism, if not baptized before death, Priesthood Ordination for males, Iniatory, and Endowment. Of course, they would have been too young to be married, so Sealing to a spouse would not be done. I’m hesitant to share all details, but I had a very spiritual experience about a young cousin who died at the age of 13 around 1970/71. Her immediate family are not active members. She was a baptized member, but no one thought to have her temple work done. Those of you who have done a lot of Family History know that the veil can be thin at times, and spiritual insight is often gained. A number of years after her death, I happened to be in a spiritual environment, in the right mindset, and my mind was enlightened to the fact that my cousin needed her temple work done. I immediately called my grandmother to see if she knew if the temple work had been done. She didn’t know. So, I had to do some research. It hadn’t been done. This was all before Family Search. Now, it is so easy to go online and look to see if ordinances need to be done. I don’t understand everything pertaining to the importance of the temple ordinances, but I know they need to be done even for those youth who have died after baptism, but before other life milestones have occurred. After my 19 year old daughter died in a car accident, we had her temple work done as soon as the one year waiting period was over.

Just finished reading the article. I had heard about some of the side-effects of porn, such as ED, aggression towards women, and a warped sense of what a normal sex life can be. (The singer Billie Eilish says she started watching porn at age 11 and was watching abusive porn by age 14 and thought it was an accurate portrayal of real life. She thinks it “destroyed” her brain.) I didn’t realize how encompassing porn addiction could be. The article was well researched. Thanks for sharing.

I’ve noticed a trend in some of my younger generation acquaintances. Many seem to be minimalists. For example, my daughter who is a minimalist, has very little extra food in her pantry. She has 2 or 3 cans of soup, a small bag of rice, a bag of spaghetti noodles, some Mac&cheese, and a couple boxes of cereal, plus an item of this or that. Anyway, not much. She only has a small freezer, and does have a couple of pizzas and frozen bread. She has 4 kids, so she has milk and juice on hand along with fresh fruit. If there was a disaster she and her family would be out of food within a week. Her husband makes a good living, so they have the money, but don’t prioritize it like I do. I’m totally opposite. My pantry is filled with soups, beans, rice, powdered milk, flour, sugar, salt, canned meats, canned veggies. I have two freezers in my garage that are filled! Plus I have another refrigerator with its small freezer in the garage also. It’s full too. This does not include my long term food storage. I try to rotate my canned goods, but now that we don’t have as many living at home I’m having a hard time using things up. I don’t know why I have this need to make sure we have plenty of food, and I’m always thinking when I go to the grocery store, “what are we getting low on?” I don’t like running out of any items. My daughter-in-law and son, with their 9 kids are always running out of something, like toilet paper, and I’m thinking, “don’t you keep a running count in your head of what you’re getting low on?” It isn’t like they are destitute and can’t afford to buy toilet paper. I might be the way I am because I grew up in a home where we didn’t have much. My mother was a widow with 7 kids. There were times when we didn’t have food in the house. It may have traumatized me.

Just a few rambling personal thoughts on stress—nothing scripturally based. After my daughter died in a car accident 19 years ago, my emotional and mental health was impacted. I have not been to a counselor, but I believe I have developed some sort of PTSD and some OCD too. My stress levels over a few particular personal issues have become extreme. On the other hand, for example, we almost lost our home to foreclosure about 10 years ago, I was very calm, relying on faith. My faith and testimony has strengthened due to my daughter’s death, not diminished. So, how can my faith be stronger, yet my stress in certain areas be higher? I would think I could overcome my stress, but it seems to be increasing as time goes by. Perhaps mental/emotional/physical health has an impact on our stress that is not alleviated by personal faith and testimony. Any thoughts on this?

I remember Donna Summer’s version very well. I used to play the song on the piano and sing the lyrics. I never stopped to think what the lyrics meant, it was just a fun song to play and to sing. But, today, I’m struggling!!! I listened to Donna sing it several days ago after reading the post and now I can’t get it out of my head! Three straight days in my head of “MacArthur’s Park is melting in the dark, All the sweet green icing flowing down, Someone left the cake out in the rain, I don’t think that I can take it, ‘Cause it took so long to bake it, And I’ll never have that recipe again, Oh no!”

I too have found that the youth understand more than we think they do. I’m working with 11 year olds to 14 year olds and that is quite a maturity age gap between them. Some of my 11 year olds are still so sheltered. Some not. I don’t mince words as we talk about the strengths and weaknesses of the people in the Old Testament. I try to bring attention to their own experiences that correlate to what happened in the scriptural experiences and share my own life experiences to enhance and bring interest to the lesson. Hopefully, it will stick with them. If your insight is correct in that the youth remember the lesson material, that is a good thing. I also hope they can remember the feelings. My own personal experience is I don’t remember anything much that my teachers taught me, or even remember the feelings. About all I remember is that one teacher told us she got married at the age of 14, (she said she wasn’t pregnant), and I was shocked! I was about that age myself, maybe a little older, and I could not imagine getting married at that age. She wasn’t too much older than us, probably in her early 20’s. Her parents gave their permission for her marriage, again something I have a hard time understanding. The only other experience I really remember is that one teacher had me babysit her children. I was the only one she trusted to watch her kids, and that made me feel good. That had nothing to do about the lessons at all. Though, I do remember that particular teacher telling us that her first born died of SIDS. So, I tend to remember the personal experiences my teachers told us.

I team teach the combined youth class of 11 to 14 year olds. We try and cover two weeks worth of lessons. It is hard to get both lessons covered, and we usually focus more on one lesson than the other, usually, just highlighting the less covered lesson. I try to follow the spirit as to what the kids need. My intent is to have the kids feel the spirit, for I know, years later they won’t remember what I’ve taught, but hopefully they will remember how they felt. I try to teach the scriptures in a manner that they can understand and to what they are dealing with at their age level. I’m really amazed at how many of the kids have read the Come Follow Me lesson for that week. And, many do it week after week. At the beginning of class we have each class member talk about their week and their thoughts of the Come Follow Me lesson. They let us know if they’ve read it or not. I am really in awe of the youth I teach. I can tell they are valiant spirits. But, I’m also very aware that Satan will not leave these kids alone. I hope and pray as they grow older and face life’s challenges and trials that they can remember Sister Classylady and her testimony, and know that they can remain strong, repent, and find joy in the gospel.

So sorry. Prayers for your family.