Grunt

I wonder what's up in the Catholic Hub......

Not in a million years. They We share quite a few hobbies. Just not the dorky ones.

Hmmm. I may need to rethink this Mormon thing......

The missionaries are people, just like you. They aren't perfect. Believe me, though, I know how you feel. Know this, though. They may "suck", but they ARE trying to help you. They WANT to help you. If you want help, open your heart and tell them how they can help you within the confines of their abilities. Otherwise, you'll have to find help yourself. Be aware that attitude and openness affects a person's ability, and willingness, to help you.

Mormon.org. Chat with the missionaries. Best thing I ever did.

Let me get this straight..... You believe the Book of Mormon to be true. You believe this is the restored church of Jesus Christ. You believe the Lord wants you to be baptized. You are going to turn your back on all that because the natural man upset you, learning church history is time-consuming and confusing, and you get yelled at while working?

Dead to me.

The original post wasn't condoning anything, it was an explanation. It's only a sin to those who serve God. Most of the rest of the world views it as normal.

Did you just call me arrogant or dumb? Pistols at dawn. I need new boots.

You probably learned more paying for college than attending college.

By "contributed" do you mean the production of porn or viewing it? Viewing porn is very normal culturally in young adults. I don't think any parent would want their child to produce it, but it's probably only a matter of time before that is normal, too. I support that with the fact that porn stars now leave the industry and move into other public careers successfully.

How so?

I see many of the issues marriages have on this forum involve pornography. A question was asked in another thread about how pornography can exist in other relationships and not have a negative impact. The answer, really, is many (most?) people don't view pornography and masturbation the way LDS do, at least on the male side. Pornography is normal for many males. It starts at a young age behind the garage decades ago with a SEARS catalog looking at underwear advertisements with your friends. It progresses from there. Heck, even television alludes to sex and pornography or features actors with less than modest clothing. It's just normal, culturally. The same applies to masturbation. It starts as a toddler. Without someone telling you "this is bad, don't do this", you grow up thinking it's normal. After all, it is "your" equipment. I still haven't found anything in the church that says masturbation is bad (but I'm sure I'm about to be bombarded with it). It has been my experience that men and women view sex differently. There is a physical and emotional aspect to sex and many men separate the two. I can sit across the room with my wife, make eye contact, and have that emotional response. It's an intimacy that can manifest anywhere, including sex. Likewise, I could have sex and NOT feel that intimacy. If I viewed porn or was unfaithful to my spouse, it wouldn't change the way I feel about her or affect my intimacy. What I feel it comes down to is respect and an understanding of the family unit. I remain faithful to my wife for MANY reasons (beyond the fact that nobody else would have me). I love her. I respect her. I'm committed to my family. Those three things alone are probably what causes me to not even desire another woman. I could probably list a million other reasons. Society and culture are changing, though. It's acceptable now or even encouraged, to put yourself first. People are no longer fulfilled by family because they're taught to pursue more. I believe people confuse fantasy with reality. They view pornography or television where the illicit affair is romantic and want it in their life. They want the fantasy to be real and they don't even realize they are pursuing it. I could never have sex with my wife again and be just as committed to her years from now as I am today, with zero possibility that I would stray from our marriage. None of that has anything to do with God, the church, or the Law of Chastity. It has to do with character, integrity, and being a man.

I've seen this come up so often on here that I'll put up a new thread on it in general discussion, from the perspective of someone who has grown up in this culture with a view on pornography that is completely neutral and outside of religion. Edit: I just spent 30 minutes typing that thread only to have it eaten by the internet. Perhaps someday I’ll be inspired to do it again.

It sounds like you're really logical, which helps. This is why I view infidelity the way I do. There are few things that affect a marriage the way infidelity and abuse do. Know that it is MY belief that infidelity doesn't change the way he thinks about YOU so much, it changes the way you think about HIM. Many men view sex differently. Same with pornography. -also, there is no defense. I could tell you childhood stories that would curdle your blood. I've never cheated on my spouse and devote my life to ensuring my wife and children won't have to experience the same. You'll get through this.

Sorry, I personally feel this is a load of hooey. A man might SAY that, but it's deflection. The only person to blame for bad behavior is shaving the face he sees in the mirror every morning. MadMaddy, Pornography is a problem. He's your husband and you work through it. Infidelity is a breach of marriage and I wouldn't expect any woman to put up with it. It isn't pornography, it's a total lack of respect for your spouse. You sound like a strong woman and I give you a ton of credit. I wish I had some advice to give you.

Nowhere.....doin' nuthin.....with a canoe!

Too late

Is this online or on LDS Library?

What's Handbook 1?

I feel your pain. I have a billion page thread mostly complaining about missionaries. I feel pretty silly about it now. Take control of your own learning. Have you been on Mormon.org? Chat with a missionary there. I have found them to be VERY helpful and if you want them to they will communicate with your missionaries. It's funny how the sisters on mormon.org can really set things straight with your ward missionaries. It seems they can get my thoughts across even when I can't.

Sigh. Too much scripture, not enough time.

I'd be down for that.

I think this post was made for me. Disclaimer: I’m not LDS. First, go to church. They love visitors. Stay for the whole thing. Meet the missionaries. Ask questions. The pace will seem fast. You may seem rushed. However, Mormons take “no” very easily. It’s your life, your pace. Don’t hinder your own investigation, but set your own pace. Download the LDS library app if you can. I listened to the Book of Mormon then used the app to read it and cross reference it with other scripture. It helped me immensely. You can get involved with the church without being a member. I attend service projects and the like. Sometimes they forget I’m not LDS. I suggest you get involved. LDS isn’t just a religion on Sunday, it’s a life towards God. I have a thread here about my journey.

Maybe look inward?