NeuroTypical

Wordnerd, actually, it's been going on since the "Police action" in Korea. WWII, for a lot of people, was the last constitutionally supported use of our military. Some folks take it as a sign that we're not really much of a constitutional republic any more, but more of an empire. Gotta declare war to use the military? Meh. We don't need to do that. Too many vital national interests at stake.

[King George III has, among other things,] kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power. —Declaration of Independence The Congress shall have Power ... To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water; To raise and support Armies, but no Appropriation of Money to that Use shall be for a longer Term than two Years.... —U.S. Const. art. I, § 8. "[A vote on going to war against ISIS] is not necessary and I don't think we need to do it. We'll see what the president lays out. That will be more dispositive." —Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA). "[Although the president doesn't need our approval,] it certainly is helpful to have Congress fully engaged." —Sen. John McCain (R-AZ). “What if [a presidential request for war] comes over and [Congress] can’t pass it? That would be a disaster. And what if you put so many conditions on it that it makes any military operations ineffective? That’s what I worry about." —Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) The Congress shall have Power ... To be fully engaged, as is certainly helpful, in the declaring of War; and to declare War at the request of the President, provided that Congress shall not Fail to declare War should the President so request; To raise and support permanent Standing Armies and to appropriate Money for the Arming of local Police Forces. —U.S. Const. art. I, § 8 (as amended).

Statistically, children who grow up in the aftermath of a divorce, are more likely to get divorced themselves, more likely to be convicted of a crime and imprisoned, less likely to start or finish college, and more likely to live under the poverty line. Not saying that any of that stuff would happen to your kids, but if he cares about them, you'd think he'd want to tilt the odds in their favor instead of stacking the deck against them.

Is he aware of what statistics predict for his children if he divorces you? Does he care?

You're looking for advice? (Hard to read, I hope I'm interpreting your post right.) A thing to remember - this church really wasn't set up to drive wedges between family members. It isn't the church of "I'll raise my kids my way if you don't believe then you have a problem". You and your husband must approach kid raising together, and you need to respect his wishes and influence. Kids worship dads for a reason - I assume he's an overall good guy, right? If you look at it more as an example to influence your kids to do right, rather than a mandate to raise mormon kids, your hubby may have an easier time with things. His comfort level should be high on your list of things to value.

Hi Honeybee, Her parents were/are not abusive. But they presided over a house where much abuse went on, spanning decades and generations. I made it sound like we cut ties, which is not really what happened. It was more like choosing to move the relationship from child victim, to adults. We presented three things we needed to see, in order to move forward with a close relationship. Basically, we needed to hear from a third party that they were no longer harboring secrets, no longer protecting and enabling incestuous humans, to the extent of lying in court cases. Basically, they represent a clear and known threat to the health and wellbeing of my wife and children, therefore we treat them as such. Forgiveness was one of the harder things my wife and I have struggled to obtain, but we did it. Mercy, in this case, means not providing them the opportunity to fail once again to protect innocents in their care. Forgiveness does not mean we need to expose our kids to the threat of harm, and my wife does not need to expose herself either. "Honor thy father and mother" does not mean we have to be a part of damaging, harmful, secretive sickness. We'd love for them to get the help they need, accept and deal with the truths they deny, and become someone safe to be around. We've prayed for such miracles, and spent a year or two trying to bring them about. The ball has been in their court for a long time, and charitably thinking, they're too unwell to return serve. So we wish them well from 668.3 miles away, on the other side of a big mountain range, and hope they someday get healthy. But no, they never lifted an abusive hand against anybody.

Hmm... I guess it depends on the reason. My wife and I took ourselves out of her parent's lives. She and they no longer talk, we avoid each other. We counseled with our bishop before taking this action, he was understanding and supportive, and signed more than one temple recommend afterwords. Last I heard, the parents are all active templegoers too. We're happily living in another state, which removes all the "avoid eye contact while passing in the halls" stuff. The temple recommend questions are an opportunity for a member to get square with their priesthood leader and their God. Avoid gossip.

Hi Andy! 1 year - cool! I can understand about missing old traditions - I spend 6 years unbelieving and inactive, and I still miss some of the activities I would engage in. Our temples are full of symbolism - you might want to consider The Holy Temple by Packer. Are you on a path to attend yourself? If you're looking for intellectually stimulating LDS works, consider Hugh Nibley.

Hi honeybee, FYI I'm not sure if there are too many active bishops, sp's or other leaders posting on this board right now. This is a question that I've thought about over the years too, I think I'll ask my bishop the next time I get a TR interview.

My mother wrote more than one suicide note blaming me and my father. To a young teen, on the verge of internalizing the content of those notes, hearing the notion that mom was being unspeakably cruel to level such blame on her son, probably saved me a lot of issues over these last 3 decades. When she finally managed to end her life when I was in my 20's, that knowledge was a strength to me. When someone is pushed past their limits and no longer in control of their actions, there's no sin in suicide. But when someone has agency in the matter - well - is there any more fitting word than 'cowardice' to describe getting out of your pain by ending your life, thus increasing the pain of your loved ones tenfold? For that matter, if that isn't what cowardice looks like, can someone tell me what it does look like? We're fallen sinners. Sometimes we do cowardly things. It's hardly outside of the realm of possibility. And having a good understanding of such possibilities can be of inestimable value to those left behind. It's sure a heck of a lot better than carrying misplaced guilt through your life because you think it was your fault your loved one ended themselves.

I reconcile free-will issues like this: "Just because I will tend to get sad when looking at sad stuff, just like 89% of everyone else, doesn't mean I don't have agency to choose." Then I sit back and gather folks' opinions to the contrary, and I've yet to find any of them persuasive.

Two questions: * Are you following state law for the notifications and steps you need to take to homeschool? I'd go the extra mile and look into why a public school teacher apparently had your kid on her roll. * What sort of social experiences do you have in mind for your 10 yr old?

I can't seem to get upset about this. Show me a business that advertises, that doesn't attempt to manipulate a desired response out of people. Show me a kid that hasn't at some point in their development, said something "just to see what people would do."

Nobody has suggested the obvious choice - stone battlements. With archer slots so you can fight off the food rioters. On the plus side, you can design the whole thing in Minecraft to get a sense of look and feel. Am I right?

Highlighted some words to consider.

Excellent choices! Congrats, folks.

Here is an excellent high-level reflection on both the downed airplane and Israel's invasion: Stratfor: Reflections on an Unforgiving Day

Oh wow Bytor. Glad you're still among us, and hope you make a full recovery.

What anatess said. As I mentioned back when this thread started, we ended up shopping for Girl Scout troops and actually ended up driving past two or three other troops to get our girls to the one we chose. There were several my wife looked at but decided against. I'm trying to remember back to the reasoning she gave me - the one run by a bunch of mormons looked too much like an extra two testimony meetings each month. Another one seemed to be run by mommies of opposing political persuasion interested in instilling said persuasions in the girls. We picked one with lots of military and a few mormons, run by people not very interested in working everyone to death to make high cookie sales. The emphasis was on socialization and earning the various fun patches and badges. To the extent the troop was biased towards a particular morality or faith or political bent, it was pretty much one we shared. Nobody ever talked about planned parenthood or any related topic. It just wasn't something the troop was going to get involved in.

Two things: First, here's a wonderful article from Orson Scott Card on dealing with difficult people who disrupt meetings: It's a matter of how, not where, we serve It's a good read. Second, this is, by far, the coolest response to a moderator inquiry I've ever seen in my entire life: High five to hubby! Don't feel stupid OW4lyf, you're in good company as people plagued with such spouses. My wife is another one. :)

Mormons have a pretty darn interesting scripture that other Christians don't have. So to answer your question, yes, we humans must forgive ALL. Even rapists and murderers. And then we leave the rest to God. If you or someone you love has been a victim of something like this, it almost sounds like a deal breaker for believing in God. But it's possible. Not only is it possible, but it's a blessing when it happens. My wife and I have done it. We speak from experience. If this sounds undoable or crazy, give this Ensign article a go: The Healing Power of Forgiveness

From my perspective, married life should be about devoting all energies to the spouse, and not feeding any pulls from outside of the marriage. This is my perspective regardless of the genders and attractions involved. So you have leanings, urges, tendencies, desires, etc. So do heterosexual spouses. Straight spouses sometimes suffer exactly what you're telling us here. Is it the notion of women in general, or do you have a specific one in mind? Is it idle fantasy, or do you think it could be a reality if only A, B, or C happened? These lines of thinking wreck relationships, gay or straight.

No, it's not purely about experience. And no, I would not employ anyone just because they say they're mormon.

I go to the gym. I wear my garments all day, change out of them into gym clothes, work out, take everything off and go use the gym shower, then put my garments back on with my regular clothing. I'm not aware of any reason to hide garments from the eyes of the unendowed, and it's never been an issue. I've gathered a couple comments from doctors at physicals when I was asked to "strip down to your underwear". Harmless enough. "Oh - you're mormon? My cousin's friend is a mormon." That sort of thing. Handy rule of thumb I've heard over the years that bishops seem ok with: The four "S"'es of not wearing your garments: Swimmings, sports, showers, and sex. Sacred, not secret. We treat them with respect. But they're articles of clothing.

Does it have to be church related? My wife was on bed rest while pregnant with our second kid. A lady from her mom's group created a website to track and organize volunteer mommies who were willing to babysit our first kid, so mom could rest and daddy could work. Mommies could go to the website and schedule a day, I logged in and found where I was taking my kid that day. After it was all over, over two dozen mommies had participated - in and out of the church. Kid #1 had a blast. Mom got to avoid the activities that threatened the life and health of the growing life inside her. Dad got to go to work and keep the bills paid.