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Nobody remembered my Birthday

angela

By angela,
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angela

angela

Posted
Posted

Sigh... so I don't really have anyone to celebrate with anyway. My kids are too young and my husband left me a little over a year ago while I was pregnant. My mom didn't even tell me Happy Birthday until after she criticized me about buying something that I bought for myself as a present. I don't even think she remembered. Heck, she didn't even tell me happy birthday, she said they were out of cake at the store.

Of course nobody from church has called or stopped by. I have no friends. I feel so alone in this world. Most of the time I sit around thinking that I really don't care if I die. I would never kill myself, but I just don't like living my pathetic life.

Not really looking for advice. I just don't know where else to post this.

:(

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AELK

AELK

Posted
Posted

Angela,

Well, many women stay 29 for years....look at it that way. No birthday, no aging.

Not to make light of your situation. But sometimes we have to laugh so we don't spend all our time crying.

I don't think that people intentionally hurt us or neglect us, I think it just happens. But I bet there are many people who love and care about you, that you don't even know about. There are people in our lives, that admire us, love us, and think about us- and we don't know it. You may not know, but there was someone somewhere that thought about you on your birthday. Someone else who considered calling you or sending you a card, but something happened so they couldn't.

I know from experience that telling you be happy because you have your children, or be happy for this or that that is in your life, is not going to help. I have found myself iritated by such comments, when I am so sad that I don't want to continue, telling me that I have children who need me, or that I have a good job or a great education, doesn't help. We are always told to count our blessings. But sometimes we need to acknowledge our pain. Too often we discount ourself, saying we have no right to be sad. But you have every right to be sad, Angela. It was a sad thing that happened.

It seems ironic that I would even give any advice to someone with what has recently happened and is happening to me. But I find I can offer advice, but I cannot figure what to do for myself. "Doctor heal thyself" never works.

Take care. And a belated "happy birthday".

You are loved.

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siouxz72

siouxz72

Posted
Posted

Hey Angela! Happy Birthday. I like what Angel and AELK had to say. My birthday is next tuesday (three shopping days people!) and I know that I have to make this my best birthday yet since, like you, my marital situation has recently changed, etc etc. Have I been reminding people here on .net and at home that my birthday is coming up?! Boy Howdy have I!!! lol! I'm such a birthday...ummm...well, I love my birthday! lol! Anyway, enough about me, sorry yours was so poopy! But now you're here and we can all help to make it better!!

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Tough Grits

Tough Grits

Posted
Posted (edited)

Have I been reminding people here on .net and at home that my birthday is coming up?! Boy Howdy have I!!! lol!

LOL LOL

You actually used it!!!!

Happy Birthday Angela :balloons:

I would be sad too if nobody remembered my b-day. From my husband and kids I only expect a "happy birthday", but from my mother I do look forward to something special. I would be terribly sad if she didn't even remember to say anything. I try to make her b-day special, and that of my kids and hubby. I just think it is important.

Still, having said that, I agree with AELK...you are not alone. You may not know us, but we wish a good b-day.

Love, :wub:

TG

Edited by Tough Grits
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checkerboy

checkerboy

Posted
Posted

I can so relate Angela, my birthday is in December so not only do I have Christmas to contend with, I just had twin neices born 2 days before me so who is gonna get all the birthday love now.... So Happy Birthday to you!!

The last birthday I had while I was still married my ex totally forgot. It wasn't till the next day that she was like, oh sorry we forgot your birthday yesterday. I think my mom even forgot too. Oh well.....

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hiddentreasures

hiddentreasures

Posted
Posted

So sorry it was an ucky day. I have found that any occasion is a great time to build memories and traditions with my kids even if I have to do it myself. I want my kids to remember my birthday when they are grown up (because likely they will be the only ones) so I try to make them fun now. So my advice is to plan your own party. Even buy yourself a present and let the kids wrap it. Let them help in baking a cake or cookies or whatever they can do. Maybe they can only put icing on grahm crackers - then do it! You really don't need the cake anyway and they will have a great time! What is easiest and the most fun for dinner. My kiddos love hot dogs and macaroni and cheese. So make it into a birthday dinner. Buy party hats or something to make it different. Well, these are my ideas. So sorry it was a bummer day. I know with my kiddos if I make it fun, they have fun too, and all those who didn't get around to it, well, too bad for them. Happy birthday!

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RainofGold

RainofGold

Posted
Posted

Hello Angela,

14 years ago my son was born a day before mine, so every year guess whose birthday gets celebrated?

In a way is kind of cool, because people lost count of how old I am:p!

Angela, I'm sorry you are feeling sad about your birthday..hope all these posts made you feel better,

Happy Birthday Angela

:balloons::birthdayballoon::birthday::

:birthdaycake:

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RachelleDrew

RachelleDrew

Posted
Posted

I understand totally.

My dad and mom both forgot my birthday on my 18th. It hurt REALLY bad, and of course you don't want to complain because it seems like such a silly thing, but it still hurts your feelings.

Now my son's birthday is a few days before mine, so I pretty much make it a point to throw out hints to people so that they remember. I don't care for presents or whatever, but i've found that when people realize they've forgotten your birthday then THEY feel guilty about it and never stop apologizing. Lol, it's easier for everyone.

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Maholix

Maholix

Posted
Posted (edited)

Hey, I wanted to let you know your not alone. I feel for you. I know forum messages don't always matter like the real thing, so I'll share with you the situation I am in. First let me set the stage.

When I was 16, my life took a turn for the worst. My mother, bless her heart, had had a stroke a few years back, and it was slowly changing her over the years. I had been falsely thrown into foster care due to people acssuing my mother of actions she was guiltless of. Finally, after a time, they pronconced the case cured, and let me go back to her. But she had needed peace. She has always had a hard life, and had some phantoms from her childhood that came back after the wrongful treatment they put her through.

So when I was able to come back to her, she was fearful of people around her. Any time I underpreformed at school, or said something she thought made her look bad, she'd in turn make it look like my fault, or push my preformance.. simply to protect herself and my brother. She was sure that the goverment would do it again unless everything looked perfect. And if that occured, she'd never see us again. So, for a few years, we began to butt heads with one another. It got so bad that we can't be in the same room for very long. Who ever's fault it is, we both needed space. We had become very different people.

The day I turned 18, I moved out.. clear to another city. Everything was well planned though. I had reiable means to survive and everything. But when I did so, many of the people I thought were my friends started stabbing me in the back. At that very same time, I started running into problems with money, due to a sudden change in some polices.

Now, I'll spare you all the griddy details. But I ended up losing my home, and being homeless till someone took me in. And in that time, my girlfriend, the one girl, other than my mother, I have ever been sure I care for, dumped me. I now do housework to eat and have a place to live. It's been years, and for some reason, I can't find work anywhere. The two people that took me in, well, they are friends, but are shelfish and brush me aside a lot till they need me to fix a problem they caused. As you can guess, no one remembers my birthday ethier. Holidays come and go like normal days.

It's hard to be stuck like this when your trying so hard. You question the value of those around you, and even your own value. Each year, when my birthday rolls by, I swear it will be different. I'll change it somehow, but so far no success. I've learned to just take each day as it comes and pray that, if this is my lot in life, that I can help someone else with it. And if the creator ever feels that it's time to give me a better life, I will be grateful.

Your not alone. Other people look around them wishing for company too. The trick is to realize the gift you've been given. It's not always what we hope, and we certainly didn't think it would turn out like this. But we are given the power to do something with it. Even if, for some reason, our dreams are doomed.. which I don't believe.. but even if they are, we can impart who we are, what we've learned, to others.

Though my mother and I don't get along anymore, not a day goes by that I am not sliently grateful for the time and effort she took with me. She was an awesome role model when I was younger, and I would not be half the man I am today if it had not for her. She took great effort to ensure I knew the importantance of a honest and moral choice. You've been blessed with kids of your own. I wish you the best in it. Good luck finding a purpose to live for, and know that life can be hard.. but you can't let it win. If you die, you give up the oppertunity to do something here.. and if you end up trying, and dying anyway, you're not out anything right? Might as well give it a chance.

And last, but not least, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Edited by Maholix
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thefam42

thefam42

Posted
Posted

WellAngela Happy birthday, I know everyone else has said as much. I'm sorry for your sorrow, and wanted to tell you that wanting to die wont make it better , I feel the same much of the time for entirley different reasons of my own doing and have started praying alot for help. Be strong and pray I hope things go better for you.

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