Gretchen Posted May 21, 2009 Report Posted May 21, 2009 (edited) Got this one from a book of mine:You are probably LDS if you've ever wondered how much less lite beer weighs than regular beer.Got more of those kind of jokes. Would anyone be interested in hearing them? Edited May 21, 2009 by Gretchen Quote
dazed-and-confused Posted May 22, 2009 Report Posted May 22, 2009 i'm easily amused.......lol.......and a convert, so i KNOW how much less it weighs.......HA HA Blackmarch 1 Quote
Gwen Posted May 22, 2009 Report Posted May 22, 2009 http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/17974-you-might-mormon-if.html Quote
Soul_Searcher Posted May 22, 2009 Report Posted May 22, 2009 That one about funeral potatoes....I never got that. It must be an American thing? What are they? Quote
AnthonyB Posted May 23, 2009 Report Posted May 23, 2009 Not being a Mormon...What about this one?? You might be a Mormon, if you wonder what God's mother-in-laws name is! Kurtis 246 1 Quote
Jenamarie Posted May 23, 2009 Report Posted May 23, 2009 (edited) You might be a Mormon if you don't understand why ettiquette books say it's "poor ettiquette" to only invite people to the Reception. You might be a Mormon if you made a special trip to Utah to buy a wedding dress. You might be a Mormon if there are basketball hoops in the background of all your wedding pictures. You might be a Mormon if you only looked at Prom dresses that came with wraps because you planned to use the material to make sleeves. You might be a Mormon if you jumped up and down with glee when Bermuda shorts came back into style (I know I did! ) Edited May 23, 2009 by Jenamarie Quote
Dravin Posted May 23, 2009 Report Posted May 23, 2009 (edited) That one about funeral potatoes....I never got that. It must be an American thing? What are they?Nasty, at least the way I've had them.Shredded hash browns, tons of cheddar (usually medium or mild, what's wrong with flavor?), sour cream and a little salt or pepper. End result? A giant bowl of fat and carbohydrates with minimal flavor and often no texture. Truly horrid.I'm sure they could be made interesting, I mean it's potatoes and cheese, what's not to like? Yet it somehow goes horribly wrong. Of course coming from a people who found a way to ruin Jell-O... :) Edited May 23, 2009 by Dravin Quote
talisyn Posted May 24, 2009 Report Posted May 24, 2009 Dravin! You are in the wrong ward. The potatoes Oakley 1st ward relief society makes are amazing. Yes, it's full of lots of fat, but some things in this life must be experienced in order to appreciate what heaven will be like.Now the jell-o, you might have a point Quote
Dravin Posted May 25, 2009 Report Posted May 25, 2009 Dravin! You are in the wrong ward. The potatoes Oakley 1st ward relief society makes are amazing. Yes, it's full of lots of fat, but some things in this life must be experienced in order to appreciate what heaven will be like.Now the jell-o, you might have a point The occasional massive dose of fat is okay (my preferred heart stopper is chicken fried steak), you do have to live a little, but the dose of fat has to be worth it. It's like limiting yourself to one cheese burger a month and making it a McDonalds cheese burger, a thorough waste of a splurge. :)Like I said, I'm sure there are good recipes out there, I've just never experienced any. Kinda like if you made some grape soda from home made concord grape juice it would be drinkable (essentially sparkling juice), just most of what I've had is the funeral potatoes version of grapette/grape soda (aka carbonated Dimatapp). *shudder* Quote
Gretchen Posted September 11, 2009 Author Report Posted September 11, 2009 Here's one I heard at Youth Conference: You might be Mormon if you think that Heck is the place for people who don't believe in Gosh. Quote
floven1 Posted September 29, 2009 Report Posted September 29, 2009 Not being a Mormon...What about this one??You might be a Mormon, if you wonder what God's mother-in-laws name is!thats just wrong but still :lol: Quote
Guest Alana Posted September 29, 2009 Report Posted September 29, 2009 I felt very Mormon the other day when I went grocery shopping and bought two gallons of milk. When I got home I thought, 'why did I only buy two gallons!?! This won't even last three days!' Quote
FairChild Posted October 4, 2009 Report Posted October 4, 2009 Either that or Alana is actually a spinster with a treasure horde of wild kitty cats. Quote
Guest Alana Posted October 5, 2009 Report Posted October 5, 2009 Truthfully, I only have two kids. But my house has become the neighborhood hang out spot for a lot more, and I watch two little boys during the week. It's not that unusual to have 10 kids here. I like to attribute the wonderful spirit in my house to the reason they are all here.... but I know it's the food, toys and art projects. Quote
ScrabbleRouser Posted March 4, 2011 Report Posted March 4, 2011 You might be Mormon if....you stayed after at your own wedding reception to help clean up...rather than racing to the hotel/motel to consumate the marriage! Quote
slamjet Posted March 5, 2011 Report Posted March 5, 2011 You might be Mormon if....you stayed after at your own wedding reception to help clean up...rather than racing to the hotel/motel to consumate the marriage!Oh my word! That's what happened to me! No wonder the marriage didn't last Quote
ScrabbleRouser Posted March 6, 2011 Report Posted March 6, 2011 I can think of a few people in my lifetime with whom that was probably the case the night of their wedding LOL Kurtis 246 1 Quote
pam Posted March 6, 2011 Report Posted March 6, 2011 That could have been my own dad. The night we threw my parents a 50th wedding anniversary party, he was already putting tables and chairs away and the party wasn't even over. Of course he had Alzheimers so it must be so ingrained in LDS men that it just came naturally. :) Quote
Wingnut Posted March 6, 2011 Report Posted March 6, 2011 That could have been my own dad. The night we threw my parents a 50th wedding anniversary party, he was already putting tables and chairs away and the party wasn't even over. Of course he had Alzheimers so it must be so ingrained in LDS men that it just came naturally. :)Nah, it wasn't the Alzheimer's. If he was putting tables and chairs away before the party even ended, it's because he was trying to chase everyone out so he could get to the hotel faster! Quote
pam Posted March 6, 2011 Report Posted March 6, 2011 I doubt that after a 50th wedding anniversary rushing off to a hotel was the last thing on my dad's mind. Quote
daplautz Posted April 20, 2011 Report Posted April 20, 2011 You're probably a Mormon if you feel awkward when you don't start and end every meeting with a prayer. mrsbarz 1 Quote
Jennarator Posted April 20, 2011 Report Posted April 20, 2011 You might be Mormon if....you stayed after at your own wedding reception to help clean up...rather than racing to the hotel/motel to consumate the marriage!I was going to say the opposite. You are mormon if you feel the need to rush off to the hotel. All the non lds weddings I have been to the couple had already slept together or even lived together so they were in no rush.... Quote
Guest Posted April 20, 2011 Report Posted April 20, 2011 You must be a mormon if, the first thing that comes to your head when you hear the words "free agency" has nothing to do with any professional sports... Quote
slamjet Posted April 20, 2011 Report Posted April 20, 2011 You must be LDS if the works/grace chant has replaced taste great/less filling. Quote
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