beefche Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Sometimes I notice (either in myself or others) an annoying habit. Often, they are harmless, just annoying. I'm wondering if someone approached you to tell you about it (because all too often we are unaware that it is annoying), how would you react? And I'm not talking about the rude confrontation--in your face, loudly proclaiming your error for all eyes and ears to see/hear. I'm talking about a tactful approach (either in person, email, etc) that is simply to let you know of the habit and how it is perceived. Would you appreciate it or would you rather leave well enough alone? And would you be one (or have you) to do something like this? Would you approach someone with that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarnished Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Depending on the habit I may or may not change it. Some habits I have are ones that I don't much want to get rid of, others are habits that I wouldn't mind getting rid of. Recently I got a camcorder that I plan to use to take videos of family events. Last weekend my dad recorded both my husband and I. I noticed from it that I tend to run my words together. I would like to change it but I am not completely sure how, as I do not notice when I am talking that I am running my words together. However other habits I might not get rid of, like for example I tend to shake my feet when sitting or sometimes bounce my leg, it is a little habit I picked up from my mom. It sometimes bothers people but it helps to calm me and often helps to make me feel at peace, so even if someone asked me to change that habit I probably would not. I am not much the type of person who tells people about habits or things they may want to change. For example my brother in law had some very bad body odor, but neither myself or my husband told him about it because we figured it would be rude. He was finally told by a complete stranger and later asked us about it. When we told him the truth he changed his deoderant and changed the way/frequency he uses cologne and deoderant. Another example is a lady I work with, she has awful teeth and very bad breath, however I can not bring myself to tell her about this and ask her if there is something she can do about it because I am afraid of offending her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Depends on the habit, I guess, and how well I knew the person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 I think initially I'm a bit taken by surprise when someone points out an annoying habit I have that I'm not aware of. Depending on my own mood, my reaction can be understanding or offended. I'm not sure how annoying a habit it is but my family pointed out that when I get frustrated or upset, I'll rub my forehead with the palm of my hand. I guess it's more of a nervous/anxious twitch more than anything. Hubby does this heavy sigh when he gets frustrated, which isn't so much a big deal but I totally notice it and I guess after awhile it kind of does get a bit annoying. He's not aware of it unless I point it out the moment he does it. But to answer the question, I don't have a problem with change or trying to change. The issue is more of if I can catch myself doing it to stop.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GaySaint Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 I would rather know, especially if the alternative was people talking about me behind my back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 A few years ago, I heard about an anonymous service that would send someone a politely-worded email, letting them know that someone had noticed [insert bad habit here], and wanted to gently inform you in a nonconfrontational way about it. I have not showered since that day, so I guess it means that service isn't around any more, or I just am too perfect to have BO. It's probably the latter. LM (why do people keep moving out of my aisle?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 No worries, LM; it's just that pesky fly that keeps hanging around your mouth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrinceofLight2000 Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Depends on the habit, I guess, and how well I knew the person.This is all that needs to be said. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prisonchaplain Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Sometimes I notice (either in myself or others) an annoying habit. Often, they are harmless, just annoying. I'm wondering if someone approached you to tell you about it (because all too often we are unaware that it is annoying), how would you react?And I'm not talking about the rude confrontation--in your face, loudly proclaiming your error for all eyes and ears to see/hear. I'm talking about a tactful approach (either in person, email, etc) that is simply to let you know of the habit and how it is perceived. Would you appreciate it or would you rather leave well enough alone? And would you be one (or have you) to do something like this? Would you approach someone with that? Just tell me what it is, Beefche. I know something is on your mind. Chances are, I"ll accommodate you in every way possible! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrinceofLight2000 Posted October 15, 2010 Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Just tell me what it is, Beefche. I know something is on your mind. Chances are, I"ll accommodate you in every way possible! She should have posted this in advice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 15, 2010 Author Report Share Posted October 15, 2010 Well, I just didn't want to be the one to say it, PC. I was hoping you would take that broad hint and figure it out. But, please stop picking your teeth! I know you like having a snack every once in a while, but come on, brother! Eat some apple or pretzels, not your lunch leftovers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted October 16, 2010 Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 But, please stop picking your teeth! I know you like having a snack every once in a while, but come on, brother! Eat some apple or pretzels, not your lunch leftovers. Picking his teeth is better than LICKING them constantly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 16, 2010 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 Hey, Wingy! That isn't nice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted October 16, 2010 Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 Although I suppose licking one's own teeth is preferable to licking others' faces. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 16, 2010 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 Just for that, I'm going to stop licking your screen! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prisonchaplain Posted October 16, 2010 Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 And the moral of this string is...be careful what you ask for...you might get it! Here I thought she was annoyed cause I hadn't been properly baptized yet... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zippy_do46 Posted October 16, 2010 Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 That is ok Beefche, my twin grand-daughters love it. :) .. They are only 7 though :)))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jayanna Posted October 16, 2010 Report Share Posted October 16, 2010 I would much rather it be in person than email if possible, and I would be like "thank you" and probably fix it, unless there is a good reason for it. and beefche, I love the licking cow, though if I look at it too long I think I need to bathe. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mormonmusic Posted October 16, 2010 Share Posted October 16, 2010 · Hidden Hidden I would consider the advice. If it was delivered harshly, then I probably wouldn't care about it. I find that if it's repetitive feedback from multiple people, then it probably has some validity. Link to comment
Melissa569 Posted October 17, 2010 Report Share Posted October 17, 2010 (edited) Would I change? No. Not unless I personally wanted to, like if I saw my own habits as destructive enough to bother me. Or unless everyone who was bothered by my "habit" allowed me to pick out a habit of theirs that I didn't like, and change right a long with me. What right do they have to point at me and say, "You're imperfect. You should change." ? Even if they do say it nicely. They're imperfect, with annoying habits too. We all are. Besides, if you're a decent person, you should never ask someone else to do something that you yourself are not willing to do. Edited October 17, 2010 by Melissa569 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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