Private messages moderated?

[AngelMarvel]

I may get banned for this...but, I have to say, when I just read that our PRIVATE MESSAGES can be read by moderators, I was appalled to say the least!

I thought a private message was just that... PRIVATE! If you are going to have the opportunity to read my private messages, it should be something that is revealed to us in the first private message we get when we join. A simple statement like, "All PMs may be moderated!"

I wouldn't say anything in a private message that I would be ashamed of the Lord seeing...but, I have said things in a private message about personal things that I would only want my friend to see. How embarrassing to think that something I may be PM'd to a friend could have been read by a moderator.

Maybe this is actually the norm on forums. I have owned my own forum for many years and NEVER have I had it set up to moderate a PM.

If I read the message HERE incorrectly, I am sorry...but, it does sound like at least 2 mods have access to my PM info.

That being said, I do enjoy this forum and have really enjoyed reading the different threads. But, I definitely won't be sending PMs to anyone.

Angel

Edited September 10, 2013 by AngelMarvel
fixed typo

[pam]

Funny...it is brought up in the site rules that everyone who sets up an account agrees to at time of registration.

Personally I don't have the time nor do I have the interest in reading pm's. That being said, if for any reason we feel there is a need, based on the actions of a member of the site, something said in a forum or a complaint by a site member, we will take a look at the pm's. But we're looking for pm's from that particular individual.

http://www.lds.net/forums/lds-net-admin-alerts/26207-spam-love-scam-emails.html

If you take a look at this you will see this site gets numerous pm's flying from those coming to spam site members. We can see in our stats on our admin panel a spike in the number of pm's in a given time period. At that point we do look at a listing of pm's to see if this is again the case. But we're looking for a large number of pm's coming from the same username.

[estradling75]

The terms of service and site rules which you agreed to before creating account clearly state that ALL aspects of this site are monitored. If you choose to just click agree and move on... (like a lot of people do) well then you have only yourself to blame if you assumed incorrectly.

As a general rule you should not put anything out on the internet that you wouldn't want others to see because once you hit send you have no control over were it goes, who might see it, and whom they might share it with

[pam]

I may get banned for this...but, I have to say, when I just read that our PRIVATE MESSAGES can be read by moderators, I was applauded to say the least!

And thank you so much for "applauding" us. It's such a thankless job. :)

[beefche]

BTW, it's only head moderators that have access to PM.

[NeuroTypical]

I thought a private message was just that... PRIVATE!

You can bold, underline, and all caps all you like, but you're correct, this actually is the norm on forums. For the reasons explained above. No really- expectations of privacy on the internet are misplaced, and you're better off without them. I'm sorry if this is a rough learning curve to you, but you'll be better off understanding it. This isn't an lds.net thing or a mormon thing, this is an internet thing. Here are fifty-six million hits from a google search to help you. They focus on Facebook and Twitter and whatnot, but the message is pretty clear.

Private Messages Aren't Private

If you are going to have the opportunity to read my private messages, it should be something that is revealed to us in the first private message we get when we join. A simple statement like, "All PMs may be moderated!"

It is true that this information is buried halfway through the long site rules. But it's supposed to be pretty common knowledge.

I have owned my own forum for many years and NEVER have I had it set up to moderate a PM.

Did you have the sexting, illegal scamming, or child endangerment problems the rest of us have been dealing with for years? I guess you wouldn't know one way or the other, since you never looked. Is the forum you owned still operating? I'd like to know what it is, to see if my kids may be interested in using it at some point and possibly being targeted in PM by predators.

[AngelMarvel]

My forum is a graphics forum and yes it is operating...thank you. And, my members PMs are not moderated. Thanks for the info and links.

And thank you so much for "applauding" us. It's such a thankless job. file:///C:/Users/Angel/AppData/Local/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image001.gif

Thank you for pointing out my typing error so I could fix it. I was not applauding this at all because I do not think it as funny. Some people do not know how to spell and others just make a typo… mine was a typo!

And... I did read some NOT all of the Terms because after reading for 15 minutes it all seemed to run into each other. I don't believe ANYONE would read every single word of this and if they did, they have more time on their hands than I do. I just never thought that "all things are moderated" meant a PRIVATE message. PRIVATE to me means private.

Seriously has everyone read this full terms & conditions?

Anyway...doesn't matter.

Be blessed and enjoy your day.

Angel

[skippy740]

Here's the link to the site rules when you signed up:

Terms & Conditions » LDS Social Network

LDS.NET reserves the right, in its sole discretion, to moderate, reject, refuse to post or remove any posting (including private messages) by you, or to restrict, suspend, or terminate your access to all or any part of the LDS.NET Services at any time, for any or no reason, with or without prior notice, and without liability. LDS.NET expressly reserves the right to remove your profile and/or restrict, suspend, or terminate your access to any part of LDS.NET Services if LDS.NET determines, in its sole discretion, that you pose a threat to LDS.NET and/or its Users.

[Wingnut]

Seriously has everyone read this full terms & conditions?

Several times, actually, the first being before I joined the site. Don't say you've agreed to something when you're not actually informed about it. You only have yourself to complain to.

[AngelMarvel]

Yes.. I see that. It's way down there in all this info. I am just saying that when we get that first PM from Heather...it would be nice if that info was right there so we would see it better. The funny thing is I have only sent PMs in this forum to Pam and no one else. Now I know not to send them at all.

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[skippy740]

I just assume that anything I post on the internet can be read by almost anyone who wants to read it.

So this is my motto: "Don't type anything stupid that I wouldn't want my family/friends to know, or to be published on the first page of the newspaper."

[pam]

My forum is a graphics forum and yes it is operating...thank you. And, my members PMs are not moderated. Thanks for the info and links.

Thank you for pointing out my typing error so I could fix it. I was not applauding this at all because I do not think it as funny. Some people do not know how to spell and others just make a typo… mine was a typo!

And... I did read some NOT all of the Terms because after reading for 15 minutes it all seemed to run into each other. I don't believe ANYONE would read every single word of this and if they did, they have more time on their hands than I do. I just never thought that "all things are moderated" meant a PRIVATE message. PRIVATE to me means private.

Seriously has everyone read this full terms & conditions?

Anyway...doesn't matter.

Be blessed and enjoy your day.

Angel

I seriously doubt anyone reads all of the site rules. However, in order to register for this site, everyone has to agree to them in order to create an account. Whether one reads something they are agreeing to is up to them.

I'm saying this generally though it will appear I'm directing it totally at you. But it's a general statement because as moderators we get this all of the time. But one should not complain about site rules that they did not take the time to read but yet agreed to at the time of registration.

[Maureen]

Angel, you're not the only one. I thought PMs were private too. I am now very selective of the PMs I send.

M.

[Wingnut]

I guess I don't understand the indignation. You're complaining that no one informed you of something that you agreed to having already read?

Edited September 10, 2013 by Wingnut
fix tense

[Guest]

We are guests here, and it's a free site. If there's something you don't want your hosts to know you're saying to other guests, maybe you ought not say it, or find another format outside of this site to discuss it.

[estradling75]

Following up on spammer.. predator comments by Pam and Loudmouth..

LDS.net draws out the Antis as well. Now when the Antis show up in the forums going after the weak and the struggling by an large we can count on a vigorous response from the various forum members until the mods can get in and clean it up.

However when the Antis target their prey in PMs there is no response like you would get in the forums. It is the struggling vs the Anti... And rarely ends well without help. Only monitoring of the PMs can give us the ability to deal with that.

As John Doe said in the thread you linked... We have neither the time nor the interests to follow all PMs the people in this forums can generate. However we do have ways of spotting the odd or potentially questionable one so we can focus in on those without reading any of the rest.

[Lakumi]

I just assume that anything I post on the internet can be read by almost anyone who wants to read it.

So this is my motto: "Don't type anything stupid that I wouldn't want my family/friends to know, or to be published on the first page of the newspaper."

i have things I would want...some friends to know but not others, and some I would want my framily to know but not my friends

and rambling thoughts no one should have to hear but all do:lol:

mind you I don't think I would be sending uncooth PM's on an LDS forum...

[beefche]

I really don't understand this appalling feeling that others feel (and no, you are not the first to discover this and be appalled at it). This site is owned by the More Good Foundation. They have a very specific agenda and mission. Why wouldn't they want to monitor all aspects of the website to prevent untold horrors that could happen?

Goodness, the chat function on this site was shut down due to unbecoming behavior of some of the members. Even though it is clear in the site rules that such behavior is unaccetable, some people just couldn't resist it while in chat. So, why shouldn't we monitor the Pms? And in case you are wondering, the blogs, pictures, videos and any other function of the site is monitored--yes, even your own profile page.

And as far as letting people know. It is there to read. As much as pam would like, she just doesn't have the time to hold everyone's hand to read all parts of the agreement. Instead of freaking out over it, once you find out something about it, go back and re-read the agreement.

[AngelMarvel]

We are guests here, and it's a free site. If there's something you don't want your hosts to know you're saying to other guests, maybe you ought not say it, or find another format outside of this site to discuss it.

I don't PM on this site. Only PMd Pam a few times because I was told in my first PM by Heather to ask her questions. I asked her a few questions about avatars and signature posting.

You all are trying to make me feel bad for having feelings about a private message and for not completely reading every single word of the terms. I could finish the BoM before I could finish that very long list. Yes.. my fault for not understanding what I did read.

It just came as a shock to me that PMs were read. Nothing more... nothing less. So please don't continue to rag on me like I am a child. I get it.

[Dravin]

It just came as a shock to me that PMs were read. Nothing more... nothing less. So please don't continue to rag on me like I am a child. I get it.

Hyperbole comparing the length of the site terms and agreements with the Book of Mormon being a quicker read don't help your cause.

Edited September 10, 2013 by Dravin

[Leah]

I don't PM on this site. Only PMd Pam a few times because I was told in my first PM by Heather to ask her questions. I asked her a few questions about avatars and signature posting.

You all are trying to make me feel bad for having feelings about a private message and for not completely reading every single word of the terms. I could finish the BoM before I could finish that very long list. Yes.. my fault for not understanding what I did read.

It just came as a shock to me that PMs were read. Nothing more... nothing less. So please don't continue to rag on me like I am a child. I get it.

You are continuing to abdicate responsibility for your actions and choices. You chose to join this site without bothering to read the rules. You are trying to blame YOUR choices on others. You are attempting to make the argument that reading the rules is too odious and burdensome for you bother with.

Whether you read the rules or not, you took the action of agreeing to them. You had opportunity to read them, but you chose not to. That's all on you.

You're "appalled" by a common practice on the internet. You are judging the owners of this site, but you don't want anyone to offer an opinion contrary to yours?

[Just_A_Guy]

We don't always read your PMs . . .

But when we do, we forward their content to the NSA.

[pam]

I'm closing. She has said she gets it. There isn't any need to further attack her thoughts and opinion on the subject.