Lost Boy Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 There is a myth out there that if you do something 21 days in a row that you form a habit. I personally think that is a bunch of rubbish. I exercised for 2 months in a row and it is definitely not a habit. I have to push myself to do it every time. Honestly, I think the only habits we have are those that bring us some kind of pleasure. Am I wrong here? I would love to find a way to make exercise a habit, but I have failed. Any thoughts on that? How about scripture study? That is not a habit for me either. I have an alarm set on my phone to remind me to do it. If I didn't, I'd probably just do whatever I wanted until bed time. I do enjoy studying to gospel, but I don't always enjoy it. Some times I feel the spirit strongly and sometimes it is more of a chore. How do you keep moving forward in a positive direction and not get complacent or lazy? unixknight, NeuroTypical and Anddenex 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unixknight Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 I think you're right that forming a habit has to be based on something you enjoy. I also agree that 21 days isn't a magic number. You can force yourself to do anything for 21 days, but if you don't like doing it you won't on day 22. The trick, I think, is to find the enjoyment in it. Any positive habit has some kind of inherent enjoyment in it, but it may not always be obvious, and it may not be the same for everybody. As for advice... I'll be next to you waiting to see what people say. I'm not so good at establishing habits either. I do have some things that help a little bit... Scripture study... I was once given the advice to write when doing it. Between writing down my questions and reactions to what I read, I try to think of it as history. Being a history buff, that helps a little. Exercise... Find something that's fun. For me, walking is boring. Riding a bike is fun. Jumping jacks and push-ups are boring, beating a heavy baq is fun. Anddenex 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnsonJones Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 (edited) Depends on the person. It can take 3 weeks to BREAK a bad habit (thus the idea that in 3 weeks you can form one). Normally it takes a little over 2 months CONSTANTLY doing something to START forming it as a habit. It can take longer than that depending on the individual. At least according to some more recent studies that I recall reading in the past year or so. PS: This site states it may take even longer How long it takes to form a new habit Quote The simple answer is that, on average, across the participants who provided enough data, it took 66 days until a habit was formed. As you might imagine, there was considerable variation in how long habits took to form depending on what people tried to do. People who resolved to drink a glass of water after breakfast were up to maximum automaticity after about 20 days, while those trying to eat a piece of fruit with lunch took at least twice as long to turn it into a habit. The exercise habit proved most tricky with “50 sit-ups after morning coffee,” still not a habit after 84 days for one participant. “Walking for 10 minutes after breakfast,” though, was turned into a habit after 50 days for another participant. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Although the study only covered 84 days, by extrapolating the curves, it turned out that some of the habits could have taken around 254 days to form — the better part of a year! What this research suggests is that 21 days to form a habit is probably right, as long as all you want to do is drink a glass of water after breakfast. Anything harder is likely to take longer to become a really strong habit, and, in the case of some activities, much longer. Edited January 24, 2019 by JohnsonJones askandanswer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 2 hours ago, Lost Boy said: How do you keep moving forward in a positive direction and not get complacent or lazy? That's a great question. I'm naturally a very very lazy person. When I tried to get in better shape, just motivating my lazy self to get off the couch took Herculean effort. What helped me was thinking "I feel bad sitting here and not working out. Working out is a pain, but I feel great after I work out, so it's worth it to me in the end.". I also set goals for myself. My first goal was to run .25 miles. Than run .50. I'm up to running three miles a day now! (@Midwest LDS, @mirkwood, @pam, @NeuroTypical and all my other Facebook friends are beyond irritated because I post so much about my work outs.) Setting goals for me has worked wonders because I feel guilty when I don't reach them. Hope this helps a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 I find it takes effort and time to break bad habits. The effort and time varies. Kicking off a new diet for me has 3-4 days of 'holy crap this is hard', then smooth sailing except for the occasional bad day. The bad habit stops having power. But yeah, 3 times in the past 5 years I've been in the healthy groove, only to ditch it and spend 3 months gaining stuff back. Was it ever a habit? Changing character, learning to stop doing something you've always done when you learn it impacts a loved one , something that big can take years of effort. Exercise/prayer/scripture reading I find relatively easy to do, with the help of electronic reminders. Or just forming the habit that I get in the car to go to work, I hit my scripture playlist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midwest LDS Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 (edited) 39 minutes ago, MormonGator said: That's a great question. I'm naturally a very very lazy person. When I tried to get in better shape, just motivating my lazy self to get off the couch took Herculean effort. What helped me was thinking "I feel bad sitting here and not working out. Working out is a pain, but I feel great after I work out, so it's worth it to me in the end.". I also set goals for myself. My first goal was to run .25 miles. Than run .50. I'm up to running three miles a day now! (@Midwest LDS, @mirkwood, @pam, @NeuroTypical and all my other Facebook friends are beyond irritated because I post so much about my work outs.) Setting goals for me has worked wonders because I feel guilty when I don't reach them. Hope this helps a bit. For me it was all about the negative outweighing the positive the pushed me to action. I'll use my desire to get in shape as an example. I like eating as much as I want, and sitting around vegetating. For me it took a lot to outweigh what I considered a positive in my life, and so I kept doing that until I was 335 pounds. What motivated me to start changing were two negatives that finally convinced me that my growing size was bad. I remember I took a 10 minute walk to class one day in grad school, and I was out of breath and sweating for an hour. That had never happened to me before and it scared me. Second, I remember being on a plane, and having to really suck in my gut to get the seatbelt to fit around my lap. I was terrified I would have to ask the stewardess for a seat belt extender. Both of these negatives finally convinced me to start exercising. Now fear is not a great longterm motivater but it got me started. After exercising for a while (3-6 months) I started noticing other postives that kept me moving. I used to get constant (nightly) heartburn and never went anywhere without a big thing of TUMS. It disappeared. I had a whole bunch of aches and pains that never fully went away. All of a sudden those were gone. For me, I felt that motivated me to keep pushing forward and (most importantly) motivated me to start again every time I failed (which has happened a lot☺). I'm not sure if this is helpful, but for me that's what motivated me to make exercise a habit. Edited January 24, 2019 by Midwest LDS unixknight 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mirkwood Posted January 24, 2019 Report Share Posted January 24, 2019 (edited) 49 minutes ago, MormonGator said: all my other Facebook friends are beyond irritated because I post so much about my work outs.) Setting goals for me has worked wonders because I feel guilty when I don't reach them. Fixed. Edited January 24, 2019 by mirkwood Colirio, Midwest LDS, unixknight and 2 others 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 4 hours ago, MormonGator said: That's a great question. I'm naturally a very very lazy person. When I tried to get in better shape, just motivating my lazy self to get off the couch took Herculean effort. What helped me was thinking "I feel bad sitting here and not working out. Working out is a pain, but I feel great after I work out, so it's worth it to me in the end.". I also set goals for myself. My first goal was to run .25 miles. Than run .50. I'm up to running three miles a day now! (@Midwest LDS, @mirkwood, @pam, @NeuroTypical and all my other Facebook friends are beyond irritated because I post so much about my work outs.) Setting goals for me has worked wonders because I feel guilty when I don't reach them. Hope this helps a bit. Oh believe me, it's not your exercise posts that we are getting annoyed with. Anddenex, Colirio, mirkwood and 1 other 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 51 minutes ago, pam said: Oh believe me, it's not your exercise posts that we are getting annoyed with. Hey at least I'm hawking my latest MLM scheme. (seriously, those people are awful) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anddenex Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 21 hours ago, MormonGator said: That's a great question. I'm naturally a very very lazy person.... Well now, that doesn't come as a surprise. Gators tend to wait for food to come to them to eat, so I guess that makes sense. pam 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 17 minutes ago, Anddenex said: Well now, that doesn't come as a surprise. Gators tend to wait for food to come to them to eat, so I guess that makes sense. And then they play games. They just roll over and over and over and over until their food doesn't want to play any longer. Anddenex 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
askandanswer Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 21 hours ago, MormonGator said: I'm up to running three miles a day now! How is this possible? There's only 24 hours in one day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 Just now, askandanswer said: How is this possible? There's only 24 hours in one day. My 5K time is horrible, (around 33 minutes) but 1) it beats sitting on the couch all day and 2) last year I couldn't run a fraction of that without getting winded. So, I'm happy. I've noticed there are two types of people out there when it comes to trying to get in better shape. The first person says "Ha ha ha you loser I can run faster like that in my sleep." The second person says "Hey great job my friend, keep it up." There isn't much of a middle ground I've noticed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
askandanswer Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 My thoughts on exercise are driven by a deep committment to (personal) energy conservation. unixknight 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anddenex Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 The concept of developing a new habit within 21 days is new to me; although, I have always heard 29 days (or a month). I might be conflating breaking of a habit though with gaining a habit. This type of principle I believe is subjective to personality, desire, and priority. I would say there are people who develop habits, such as this, real quick (within 21 days). My wife is one of those that fits this model. If she puts her mind to something (desire and priority) she will actually develop this habit within two weeks. I have been amazed at how quickly she develops habits, good habits. If a person moves to make something a habit like we perform new years resolutions then 21 days will not be sufficient as the desire and priority are not inline, as the desire isn't real it simply is "I know I am supposed to do this but I don't really care, but I do care." (double-minded) Habits develop quicker where our desires and priorities align, if not, then excuses will take over the habit and will never actually acclimate to our personality. How to build a habit, I like a quote I heard recently from Marvels Agents of Shield. It doesn't matter how big or small the steps may be, as long as those steps are in the right direction. The right direction being your habit to form. I think when developing the small steps we take are when it is a chore or seen as a chore, and our larger steps are when our desire, attitude, and priorities align. When they don't, then we just need to focus on the smaller steps. My problem, is I don't like taking small steps -- patience to obtain a habit or knowledge is my weakness -- and I murmur more than I should. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mirkwood Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 2 hours ago, MormonGator said: My 5K time is horrible, (around 33 minutes) but 1) it beats sitting on the couch all day and 2) last year I couldn't run a fraction of that without getting winded. So, I'm happy. I've noticed there are two types of people out there when it comes to trying to get in better shape. The first person says "Ha ha ha you loser I can run faster like that in my sleep." The second person says "Hey great job my friend, keep it up." There isn't much of a middle ground I've noticed. I've got a pretty good 5K time. screen shots askandanswer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 2 hours ago, MormonGator said: My 5K time is horrible, (around 33 minutes) I wouldn't call that horrible at all. My 5K time is "I did some 2K's once with my pre-teen daughter, a few years back." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 57 minutes ago, NeuroTypical said: I wouldn't call that horrible at all. Thanks bud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
askandanswer Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 Bad habits take a week at most to develop, good habits about a year. Good habits take about a week to break, bad habits at least a year and sometime a lifetime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
askandanswer Posted January 25, 2019 Report Share Posted January 25, 2019 My most recent 5k run was January 20 -25. (Not all at once) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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