ruthiechan

I am really happy for your girls Slamjet! I'm glad they figured that stuff out sooner than I did! There's a teacher (PhD) at the college I attend who's my age (32). Man, it really showed me how slow I've been. Ah well.

It's how he's looking that makes the difference. A quick appreciation of beauty is okay, but lingering, ogling, that sort of thing is not. Also, women who dress immodestly are making it harder on him. Perhaps he needs something to distract him, like your arms encircling him, your sweet loving voice saying his name, a gentle kiss followed by a smile. You direct his sexual desire back onto you. You want him to want you, so do things that make him think of you in that way instead. Pray for a calm heart and a clear mind so that you can better receive guidance from the Holy Ghost. That has always helped me during emotionally turbulent trials. If you have a hard time being sexually adventurous (this is common) nab the book, "And They Were Not Ashamed." It's the closest guide the Church has on how to have a sexually fulfilling marriage. I also wished that I had read, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" before my husband and I separated (we're back together now, I learned the hard way though). I dunno if that'll help you or not.

Customer service skills simply means you're good with people! Those skills are totally transferable to any other job.

I wonder if he feels the same way toward people who need glasses. . .

True. But whenever I haven't followed a prompting I've regretted it. Today I had a strong prompting that I needed to go to Michael's NOW, and not wait while my daughter was in gymnastics. So I went, grabbed the sketchpads on clearance and left. Turns out, my daughter was having some emotional issues and as a result did not go to gymnastics, and my husband needed me to boot. If I had not gone to get those sketchpads in the morning I would have felt annoyed by the whole thing and would have had to spend emotional time to make that go away, but as it was, I was able to immediately attend to my family's needs, and that made all the difference.

I used to take things very personally. And, oh, if my husband said no to sex I felt it was an outright rejection of me. He had to TELL me that he's not rejecting me, but that he's just not in the mood right now, but that he still loves me and will want to later. He had to remind me of all the good things, that he was not attacking me personally, in order to be able to talk to me about a sensitive issue. Now, I finally get it. It took a while, but I got it. I do think that seeking advice from the Bishop would be a good thing.

William K, *hugs*

Sometimes with special needs kids (it depends on what that special need is) animal therapy is VITAL. So it can be a blending of the two majors. When I have doubts, that's when I think of a very specific question, and then ask the Lord. Sometimes it's as simple as, was my first prompting correct? I have found it quite helpful. Remember, even if you do not want to change majors right now, the Lord will not ask you to do something with your life you'll absolutely hate. It is for your benefit. If you are still confused even after talking to Heavenly Father about it, a Priesthood blessing may be in order. I know that has helped me in the past as well.

Yeah, when I only had a few friends on there it wasn't that great, hard to experiment, but as more people join, I find that I like it more and more. :)

You're in my prayers Slamjet!

PM me your email address and I'll send you an invite. :)

It's actually better than facebook because you have full control over who sees what. In FB if someone friends you but you don't friend them back and you don't go through a two step process to say, no, I don't want to friend you, that person can see all your posts as if they were your friend. In Google+ if someone chooses to follow you, that's fine, but if you don't put them in any of your circles then the only posts of yours they see are the ones that you mark as public. The interface is also nicer than facebook. I find it rather spiffy and more enjoyable than FB. The only reason why I still visit FB is to stay connected with those not on G+.

I think you should end with your testimony. What form that takes is something you and the Holy Ghost can work out together. :)

Anyone on Google+? Anyone not and need an invite? I think it's spiff-tastic!

My sister experienced a bit of a midlife crisis where she started thinking about other men. After she talked to her husband about it, it went away and hasn't been a problem since.

I would totally stand in line for that!

So, you won't offer him the advice to seek the Lord's will in the matter?

Asking someone to look at an apartment for him because he does not live in the area is bailing him out? That's not bailing him out, that's asking for a favor. It doesn't cost you anything but a bit of time to do that for him. Seriously, you need to take the judgments down a notch. His financial situation is none of your business. I know someone who lives off odd jobs and student loans, and internships. He is able to support his wife and four children. You need to encourage your brother to ask for guidance from the Spirit and to follow that guidance. You need to encourage him to pray with his fiance as well. You can start by saying, "Look bro, I love you, and I am worried about you, but you know what? The best person to give you advice on this is Heavenly Father, so you and your fiance should ask him about it." That'll help keep your relationship with your brother intact and direct him to the Spirit. The biggest mistake people make when getting married is not including Heavenly Father in the plans.

I know a couple who dated in college, he went on a mission, she waited for him, a few months after his return they were married. Then. . . well, the details are not mine to share, but 25 years and eight children later, they divorced. They still believe it was right to marry, but felt they got the timing wrong even after all that time they spent together before getting married. I should mention that divorce is the result of someone in the marriage not keeping the commandments.

If your sources of information are telling you that the problem is some unrecovered memory, I would question those sources. I would not encourage him to go through memory "recovery" because the problems false memories cause can do more damage to him. Alcohol and other drugs make his condition worse. Here is a page that demonstrates this very well. I hope you go through it, especially since some of his issues are directly discussed. He's an interesting case, however, it is possible he's been misdiagnosed. The Amen Clinics

It's a HUGE thing that HE wants to be well. I remember being severely depressed many many years ago. My boyfriend, now husband, was instrumental for pulling me out of it. I wanted to be well, but I did not know how. I did not know how to be happy. It was unfamiliar and scary, but I didn't want to feel awful anymore either. He was my bridge to happiness. I crossed that bridge and I've been better for it. I still occasionally have issues with depression but it's so much better than before. If it were not for my husband I don't know if I would believe that, "This too shall pass" and something better can happen. Fast and pray for him, to know what to do for him. I don't know what his mental illness is, but healing is possible.

Even if the children don't ever bother to talk to you unless they want something out of you? This is what appears to be the case. How about getting to know the new wife better? How about showing her love and acceptance? How about building a positive foundation so if there is something of sentimental value you would like to have she may be willing to part with it? I hate it when people do not respect the will, even if you don't like it, you should respect it. I also hate it when people complain about their parents spending their inheritance money. Wait what? Dude, they're not dead yet, that money is not yours!

(I really needed a smug grin, but this'll do.)

So, does this mean I can report posts that are baseless judgments against a question being asked? I really hate it when I see someone get creamed for posting a question that appeared to be anti-Mormon, and even being labelled troll. We simply do not know one way or the other yet. By their fruits ye shall know them, but if we don't allow people to grow here they'll never bear fruit and we'll never know what they would have produced.

The funny part was, I was worried she'd think I stood her up because I got lost! LOL! (My cell phone died and refused to charge in Utah, how did I live without a cell phone back in the day? Egad!) Oh yeah, definitely magnetic. You're either attracted by her or repelled by her.