Connie

Perhaps it's a reference to the temple. Of note, this is one of the hymns we have in our current hymnal that Emma used in the first LDS hymnal which was printed while the Kirtland Temple was being built. It is one of William W. Phelps adaptations of a Christian hymn.

I was a Committee Leader in charge of the food for RS Evening Meetings. My RS Counselor was fantastic. She rolled up her sleeves and worked right next to us. We geared the food to be in sync with the meeting theme. The two sisters that were on the committee with me were fantastic. They came up with some rather fantastical food/treat ideas. Our RS Presidency chose to NOT have the general RS sisters sign up to prepare the food. Too many of them disregarded what the menu was and brought *their family traditional* dish.
I made sure that we didn't spend more than $25.00 for the food. Then myself and my two helpers prepared it. If we only spent $10.00, the remaining $15.00 went back into the Evening Meeting Food Budget. so that when the RS Birthday Meeting came around, all the left over money went into it.
FYI, we are a small branch. Yet the evening meetings generally ended up with more sisters attending than our Sunday meeting. It was the ideal meeting for the less actives, neighbors, co-workers and investigators to attend, and they DID.
So, sit down with your committee ladies and ask them what works for them. Worked with the previous counselor, didn't work. What they would like to do. Then LISTEN. Make notes, go over the notes BEFORE your meeting with them ends. I sat my ladies down around my dining room table. Had a pitcher of ice water and tuna fish salad, ham & cheese sandwiches and the three of us had a small *legal* note pad & pen to write on. For three hours we went over the Generalized Didn't work, Did work, & Would Like to see if it will work ideas. The 2nd morning after each Evening Meeting we met over lunch to compare notes and to make plans for the next months meeting.
I met the following morning after the meeting with the RS Counselor. She gave me her insights on Didn't work, Did work, her suggestions for improvement and the next months meeting topic/theme.
Keep an open mind, LISTEN to your Committee Leader and her crew. Also, before anything is finalized be sure it is run by you, so you can run it by the RS Pres. I always had a grocery list with the prices to give to my RS Counselor - and items such as spices, sugar, flour, cupcake liners, etc. where you don't use it all - was kept in a special section of my kitchen and was used ONLY for RS Meetings.

@ConnieGood Luck! I was a counselor in charge of activities. I had zero experience in the Lds church so I ran it like a job. I sent emails asking for help and detailed instructions about what was to be done. Things worked out but I would be kinder and gentler next time round.

I have been told I'm over teaching, YSA, and food committee.

Right! I just learned about a stake training meeting I get to go to tomorrow night. So that should be helpful.
Looks like I've got some reading to do.
I'm the 1st counselor and was set apart yesterday. Then there was a meeting right after--the RS Presidency with the Elder's Quorum Presidency. I felt like I had been thrown into the deep end without knowing how to swim (all these water analogies)! I have been in Primary for a long, long time. My schedule just got a whole lot busier.
Thank you so much for your advice!

Hi, all! I've just been called to my ward Relief Society presidency. I'm feeling like a fish out of water right now.
I've been poking around on lds.org trying to learn some more about this calling. If anyone can offer me some advice or some good/helpful resources to look at, I would be grateful!

It's full name is Food Preparedness Committee. They are involved in activities. I guess there's a demand for food storage, preparedness, and simple meal preparation ideas here locally. They tend to give a short talk or demonstration during an activity or sometimes something more involved. I'm not super worried about it. There is a committee leader, and she's really on top of things. I figure I just need to listen to any of her ideas and concerns and bring them to presidency meetings as well as making sure she is aware of assignments well ahead of time and is prepared with any help she needs.

Counselor isn't so bad.  Focus on the things which pertain to your assignments.  For example, if you're not assigned to supervise RS Meetings (aka Homemaking), then skip chapter 13 of the handbook until a need comes up (it's about activities).  If you're over teaching, "Teaching in the Savior's Way" will be more important.  Etc.

I see. When I first read this essay and now as I've read it again, I don't think the essay makes it clear that these theories were Brigham Young's reasoning. I think it's quite the opposite. Especially when I read this paragraph: 
"Following the death of Brigham Young" and "Over time" would seem to indicate that the theories came later and not from Brigham Young, himself. The essay then goes through the theories but says nothing about them being Young's reasoning. I've looked through the resource list and can't see anything that would indicate such. Can you point to some sources that would indicate these theories were the reasons Brigham Young, himself, gave? I am not seeing anything in the essay to indicate that is the case.

I have been told I'm over teaching, YSA, and food committee.

Right! I just learned about a stake training meeting I get to go to tomorrow night. So that should be helpful.
Looks like I've got some reading to do.
I'm the 1st counselor and was set apart yesterday. Then there was a meeting right after--the RS Presidency with the Elder's Quorum Presidency. I felt like I had been thrown into the deep end without knowing how to swim (all these water analogies)! I have been in Primary for a long, long time. My schedule just got a whole lot busier.
Thank you so much for your advice!

Handbook 2, chapters 1-6, 9 and 13 (first priorities; the remaining chapters can come later - assuming you ever have the time - ) Note that there's not a ton of guidance there for counselors; the RSP kinda decides which of her responsibilities you'll help out with I would start here and ignore the stuff below until you've read at least 1-6 and 9 https://www.lds.org/callings/relief-society?lang=eng Though sometimes it takes them way too long to get new stuff added Log in to LDS.org (don't just go there, log in), and then from the My Account and Ward menu, poke around in "Leader and Clerk Resources". Only works after someone has entered your calling in the system. Daughters in My Kingdom could be more useful than you'd think https://www.lds.org/mycalling/ministering?lang=eng https://www.lds.org/manual/teaching-in-the-saviors-way?lang=eng https://www.lds.org/manual/come-follow-me/relief-society?lang=eng A lot depends on which position in the RSP you have, specific responsibilities assigned by the RSP, local needs, your strengths.
If you haven't been set apart, get set apart!!!  (If you're getting sustained next Sunday, for example, get set apart immediately after church, don't put it off.)  I have come to believe that this is crucial, that until it happens, you don't have the authority / stewardship / guidance / blessings associated with a calling - you just have the calling and sustaining, and those aren't enough.
If you're a counselor or secretary, the best thing you can do is to consider the things the RSP asks you to consider and then speak your mind freely in RSP meetings.  Make your point / argue (not contentiously) your case, but then let the RSP have the decision and support her in it whatever it is.  Too many don't speak their mind, give their counsel, defend their position so that the RSP fully understands it.  (I suppose that depends on all the dynamics of various personalities, but your RSP needs your counsel and needs to understand why you gave that counsel.)

Wait. I thought we were supposed to forget the various theories about why it was put in place. Now I'm confused. Aren't the theories what are being "disavowed," not the ban itself because we don't know the reason for it?

Wait. I thought we were supposed to forget the various theories about why it was put in place. Now I'm confused. Aren't the theories what are being "disavowed," not the ban itself because we don't know the reason for it?

Wait. I thought we were supposed to forget the various theories about why it was put in place. Now I'm confused. Aren't the theories what are being "disavowed," not the ban itself because we don't know the reason for it?

The Ban itself is/was legitimately done by one with the power and authority to do so.
Why the Ban was issued is unknown and we have been told to stop guessing as to why.  (Which would include guessing which prior reasons are wrong)  Because the reason has not been made known to us.

I'm right there with ya, bro.

I'm right there with ya, bro.

I'm right there with ya, bro.

I'm right there with ya, bro.

I'm right there with ya, bro.

No, not THAT closet...

I'm an introvert. I mean, that isn't really news to me per se, in the sense that if you asked me a year ago if I was an introvert I would have said yes, but it wasn't until very recently that I actually began to understand what that really meant, and how accurate it is to say that I am an introvert.

I hate that word, just by the way it sounds, and yet I find myself repeating it over and over in my mind, because it's a word for all of my weird personality traits, the things I do that I can't seem to control, and my preferences and actions that have caused me massive guilt over the years.

Most people don't know what an introvert is. Most of the people who think they know actually don't either. I didn't. An introvert is someone whose brain structure is wired a bit differently than most other people. We are energized and happy when we are alone, and it takes mental energy for us to be with other people, especially in large social environments. It isn't necessarily that we don't like to socialize, it's just that after we do, we need time alone to rest and recover. We think differently, we see things differently. We think deeply and long, and I'd venture to say we're some of the most insightful and deepest thinkers to be found anywhere, if I may say so myself. We struggle sometimes with social awkwardness. We become overstimulated easily because our brains process EVERYTHING we see and hear, constantly, and so our minds are always working hard, even when we're sitting still and quietly. Dealing with other people in noisy environments tires our brains out quickly and we often find excuses to leave early or not come out to gatherings at all. We do best when we speak slowly, and we fall behind quickly in a fast paced conversation. Our social awkwardness comes from trying to fake it and be like everybody else...

I'm posting this because maybe I'm not the only one who was going through life not understanding why I did things the way I did.

When I was a kid growing up, I had a brother who was about 12 years older than I. I looked up to him so very much. He was the kind of big brother who would stick up for me, and often dealt with neighborhood bullies if they'd been picking on me and my friends. He was into Dungeons & Dragons, horror movies and sci-fi. It always stuns me a bit when I think about how much of my personality and interests come from him as a template. He had a quick sense of humor and some of the proudest moments of my young life that I can remember came from times when I fired off a joke that made him laugh. He wasn't perfect of course, and could be a jerk sometimes, but I loved him so much and wanted to be like him in so many ways.

But my brother was an extrovert. He enjoyed being around people. He liked to go to parties, hang out with friends, travel with people. I rarely saw him alone, though he always seemed willing to make time for me. He was more of an example for me of what I wanted to be like than even my own father who I suspect was also an extrovert but I'm honestly not sure. I have tried so hard, in many ways to be like my brother and, to a lesser degree, my dad.

But I can't be, at least not entirely. And I've only just realized it. I can joke, I can make people laugh, I'm told I have a pretty good sense of humor, but the problem is, I can't make you laugh if I don't know you. I'm socially inept around people I don't know. I have felt embarrassment about it, but always chalked it up to some other factor. I tend to over share. (Doing it right now, I bet). I tend to crack jokes at the wrong times. I tend to try to be jovial, open and friendly like my brother was, but most of the time I just seem to find myself wishing I could have a do-over.

Often times I'll make plans with my friends but cancel on them at or near the last minute because I just want nothing more than to stay home in sweats and a t-shirt and keep to myself. I almost never go to parties of any kind. When I do, it's because I feel obligated and I spend every minute I'm there wondering about how long I have to stay before I've been there long enough to leave without being rude. My friends sometimes get annoyed at me (which I understand completely) and I had become known as the guy who was the most difficult person in my circle of friends to draw out of his house. The fact that I have kids is a massive blessing for me because they provide me all the excuse I need to stay at home when I want to, which is most of the time.

A few years ago, I had signed up to participate in a Warmachine tournament up at he now defunct DropZone game store. I knew I'd get my butt kicked up between my shoulder blades but I was fine with that. I wanted to become a better Warmachine player and to so that you have to lose a lot of games.... but as I got closer and closer to the store I felt an increasing sense of dread, like I just didn't want to go. I wound up arriving late, but not so late that I couldn't enter. One of the tournament organizers was playing since they had an odd number of people show up, but with my arrival, problem solved! He could get out of having to play and just focus on running the tournament. But as I stood there, looking at the massive number of players (man, this tournament was bigger than I anticipated) and the crowd, and the idea that I'd have to meet and play 3 new people and here I was, all by myself, none of my friends around...

I panicked. I declined to enter the tournament. The T.O. assured me it would be great if I played, that things had only just gotten started and there was plenty of time but... I just couldn't. I went out of there with my tail tucked between my legs, guilt and embarrassment swirling around me. I felt like a complete coward and jerk. I didn't understand why I did that, but I knew I'd probably do it again, so never again did I sign up for another tournament for any game.

I've felt so broken for so long. I though there really was something horribly wrong with me that resulted in my doing such odd and contradictory things. I wanted to be like my brother. Social, open, always happy in a crowd... I tried to force it. I used to go to DropZone every week on Thursdays after work with the idea of making friends and playing games.

I did this for a year.

I played so few actual games I could count them on one hand. No, I don't mean I played few game systems. I mean I played a game with somebody only a handful of times. 2 games of Infinity, one game of Warmachine and 2 games of Firestorm Armada. The rest of the time I just hung out, watched others play, and tried to look like I fit in there. The only time I was happy when playing a game there was with my friends, but even then it took a lot out of me and when the game was over, all I wanted to do was go home and hide in my introvert den.

Yeah, I'm the guy who built the Space Marine cosplay and in the span of two hours probably had 150 people come up to have their picture taken with me at a convention in DC in 2016. It was fun for a while, but when my comrades and I doffed our armor for a break, they got dressed back up afterward and returned to the crowd while I couldn't even bear the thought. I made up a story about my body feeling tired and sore. That wasn't entirely a lie, but it wasn't the main reason. I needed to be alone, or at least, as alone as possible.

All these weird things I've done while trying to be someone I'm not finally make sense to me. I'm an introvert who has been trying to behave like an extrovert, because the people in my life I have looked up to were extroverted, as far as I can tell, and I wanted to emulate them.

Can't do it anymore. Turns out, my way of thinking, feeling and seeing the world are perfectly normal for an introvert. Turns out, I'm not as broken as I thought. Funny thing is, we talk about being introverted as if it's a bad thing. Honestly, I wouldn't change it if I could. Being an introvert lets me understand and think about things on a level that's exciting and fun. It's what has helped me to be successful in my career and I wouldn't change it for the world. Yes, it means I'm not so much like my brother as I once wanted, but I'm okay with that. I have a lot of good things in my life that I learned from him and they're not going to go away. I'll still play D&D with smaller groups, I'll still play wargames with my friends and I'll still NOT play online multiplayer much.

If this feels familiar to you, and you'd like to learn more, Introvert, Dear is a site with support and information for introverted people.

Move on, Wade. And may I just say I’m rather in awe of you right now reading through this thread. Your posts are so patient and well thought out and respectful. You are a gentleman and a scholar. Well done, sir.