askandanswer

Really?  And he went into something that would get his name into the media?

@thelizardofoz if you take this advice I would do it out of love and connection, not out of fear. I’d urge you to not make any decisions out of fear. 
You have been through a lot and I saw that you are seeing a therapist, awesome! I’ve had a therapist for over 5 years (at this point I only see him as needed) but it’s so helpful to work with someone when you’re dealing with so much. 
Now to give you my advice, try to be your best self FOR yourself. This girl may be a huge motivator for you and I believe people are meant to motivate one another, especially when it comes to a marriage. But don’t lose sight of another huge aspect of life, honoring your inner self and your relationship with the divine. Lean toward that and things will happen as they should, whether it be with this woman or not.
 

These people should complain to someone - the question is, who.  I have to believe that this is illegal inside the US.  IMO, the folks in your area should be trained on how to handle idiotic border guards.
Oh, and they should bring copies of the Book of Mormon to hand out next time.    Oh, and there's special "Temples" magazine from years ago that talks all about the temple, complete with photos - they should take copies of that next time too.
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Yeesh.  Flashback to when I taught Gospel Essentials.  In attendance:
- A guy in the middle of a nasty divorce, including abuse allegations and custody battles
- A very, very single guy in his late 30's
- A sarcastic 18 yr old girl with one foot out of the church, there because mom still was able to force her to go
- A recent convert with a loud mouth and a ton of misinformation about our faith.
The lesson, of course, was The Family can be Eternal.  I had to teach these folks that we're all supposed to get married in the temple and have a perfect family, without insulting the single, destroying the guy getting the divorce, being the last straw for the young woman, or letting the loud convert take us all into the weeds.  I would have gladly given my right arm to swap with the Gospel Principles teacher and hide in front of 30+ people.  
The Lord seemed to let me take this without much in the way of prompting or guidance.  I think I did ok.  We talked about the "stereotypical perfect mormon family", and griped for a while about how it doesn't look even remotely like any of our situations.  Then we talked about why we teach that picture, if it's not something that seems to be in the cards for many of us.  Then, with the understanding that "try your best" doesn't mean "succeed or go to hell", we went through the lesson as outlined.  More than one of us had the puffy eyes before it was over. 
That was sort of my mount everest of teaching.  I think we all survived.  My first-and-foremost, above-all-else consideration, was love for each of these people, and as much empathy as I could summon.  I don't remember, or care, where they sat.

I might not be LDS, but you said something that crosses denominational lines:  That you are attending your ward even though you don't feel like it. Please know that you are not a hypocrite for doing so. Rather, when you praise Heavenly Father, despite not feeling like it, you are offering a sacrifice of praise. It's easy to praise God when we feel the glory. When we feel down, draggy, and just dull, yet choose to praise Him anyway--I truly believe God smiles extra long at that. So, kudos for bearing up through this difficult season.

This reminds me of Winston Churchill who was once told that by the year 2000 women would rule the world.  His response was – still?
 
The Traveler

And I read it as four 6" heels.

Make sure it's at the back

I'm absolutely delighted to learn this new doctrine as I've been feeling a little uncomfortable about the thought of sharing the celestial kingdom with gamers. I guess that God is wiser than I thought.

In my ward there are always some people who routinely ignore requests to not sit at the back and to move forward. The person who makes the request almost never asks twice, accepts their right to sit where they choose and just continues on with their lesson/message. 

Make sure it's at the back

I got one and only one suggestion if you see this as a problem (I don't).  Be a Hallway Mormon and get to know these people and see if you can find out why they're in the hallway.
I sometimes stay in the Hallway.  Usually, it's because I met some people that I haven't seen in a while and so we talk in the hallway to catch up and fellowship.  I find it more fulfilling to fellowship with Saints I haven't seen in a while than sit in Sunday School for a lesson that I can study on my own.  But that's just me.

Become friends and ask them what's up.  

There are a ton of reasons. 
Spiritual reasons: Some folks are struggling to be there.  Some folks don't want to be there at all, but show up for various reasons.  Or are apathetic.  Or feel like outcasts. Or, as you mention, are addicted to the internet and their devices.  
Health reasons: Some folks have colds and don't want anyone to catch it.  Or people have colds, and they don't want to catch it.  Some have mental health issues and don't do well in crowds or classrooms.  In my ward, there are two that have chemical sensitivities, and rarely even make it into the building.  They are as active and faithful as their health allows them to be.  
Practical reasons: Foyers are a blessing to folks with young kids learning to behave, or throwing fits. 

@The Folk Prophet, compared to your usual posts, this one is a little more cryptic than usual. However, based on your usual posts, I'm confident that there is an important idea somewhere in here, and the fault is mine for not being able to discover it.  

I'm an Australian so I guess I have a different point on view on this issue.  We have very strong Gun Control laws, that's not to say you can't get one, but its very involved and certainly not easy.  I can count on my fingers the amount of these kind of shooting incidents we've had in our schools and community.  I think the Gun Control laws should be looked at.

Ahhhh, good, now I know who to blame - the rules at Sunday's high school  

I think this school is making a mistake. By not giving the girls the right to choose for themselves who they want to dance with does not necessarily promote inclusivity. It just takes away their right to choose. Teach kids why it's important for everyone to want to choose to be kind to others, to everyone. Forcing kids to be inclusive and kind is not authentic, it's not real kindness - it's forced.
M.

There's one big thing I haven't seen mention yet in this thread:
When the Lord tells you not to do something, it's not just because it makes Him upset.  Rather, when He tells you not to do something, it's because that thing hurts you.  Like when I tell my daughter to wait before drinking her hot chocolate- I tell her so because I love her,  And if she doesn't wait and burns her tongue, that pain is not because I'm punishing her-- rather it hurts because burns hurt, and being burned is the consequences of her actions.  I didn't want her to burn herself- that's why I told her to wait!  But she has her choice...
Conversely, when the Lord tells you to DO something, it's because it's good for you.  And naturally good things follow.  Why don't we always do this?  Frankly, we can be quite lazy, sin loving, or short sighted.  Like I should have worked out today... but I didn't.  I got on the computer instead.  I was lazy.  
 
Relating this to the ultimate "to follow God or not": again, you can come unto Him and feel the good things.  Or you can not and face the natural consequences of your own actions. 

Well, LDS belief on the matter is a bit more choice-rich than most of the rest of Christianity.
John 4:2 "In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you."
Psalm 82:6: "I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High."
Romans 8:17: "And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together."
We mormons take those scriptures (and those like it) and run with it hard.  We figure there are degrees of Glory, levels of heaven, different ways to end up living the rest of eternity.  We take the "children of God" claims in scripture literally, and we realize that children are of the same race as their parents, and we can grow up to be just like them.  Yes, we dare to go there.   We're more than just God's creations, we're actually, literally, fully, His children.
We also wonder exactly how "eternal", eternal punishment will be.  Since one of God's names is "Eternal", perhaps those scriptures just mean "God's punishment".
We also figure there are temporary states after death, but before the final judgment.  Purgatory and paradise - where people still have some sort of ability to choose to follow Christ.
 
Yeah, we do more than the black-and-white either heaven or hell thing in this faith.  The only folks who end up permanently cast out of God's presence forever, are those who see clearly and make that choice, despite every effort from a loving and perfect parent.

I think that when courting a woman, some of the best advice you will get will be from another woman. Even more so if that woman is your mother. On a negative note, I would have sent her a text asking if I could call her on Valentine's Day, not telling her, but its too late now. When you tell her, you don't get any idea about how she feels about it.

If i had grandchildren I'd want them to stay with you.  Do you offer a pickup service or would i have to deliver? 

If i had grandchildren I'd want them to stay with you.  Do you offer a pickup service or would i have to deliver? 

I don't know so go think about something else  

That seems like the best thing.
Perhaps another good thing would be to demonstrate maturity and responsibility (and benefit you and the person you're considering marrying) via one of those pre-marriage classes / counseling sessions / tools / whatevers which help you discuss things that too many don't think to discuss before marriage - who's gonna pay the bills, do you want children, what should their education look like, who will mow the lawn, does one of you have unexpected sexual expectations, who will keep the house clean, who will work full time (before, during, and after children), will one of you stay home with the kids or are you expecting day care, what are your respective family health risks, will you share your fountain pens and inks or keep them entirely segregated - and whatever all else those things / people / places help you to consider.  Such a thing would both help the two of you to make wise choices and avoid problems, and demonstrate to others that you're not just going all stupid ga-ga for each other and it's all gonna fall apart after the hormones calm down.