BeccaKirstyn

I could quote more parts of your posts, but this is sufficient enough. These statements are indicative that your pride is still very present. From your explanation of the events, a lot of what has happened was a result of your pride/lack of communication during your years with her. Of course marriage is a 2-way commitment and it is not always the case that it is only one person's fault (although there are instances--i.e., abuse), but from the things you have described, you were essentially emotionally abusing your wife. Again, this is just my perception of your posts. So take a good hard look at these statements and realize you're being very bitter and prideful about the situation still. I understand it's hard not to be, especially considering your tendency to sink into that prideful mentality. But if you want to start moving forward in healthy way, you need to learn how to better work through your prideful thoughts and recognize them for what they are. As others have said, you cannot change her mind. She has made that very clear. It is best that you move forward with your life, bettering yourself, and accepting the consequences of how you treated many situations over your years of marriage with her. I wish you the best of luck on this new journey in your life. God will not restore something that would require taking control of another's agency. This is not His fault. Turn to Him in your time of sorrow and growth, and He will make you to be who you are capable of being.

I'm from Nevada and went to college there. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions about the area!

I don't disagree that by having very strict standards you're protecting yourself from any assumed harm/wrong doing. But in the scenario (which some assume to be occurring) that someone tells a blatant lie about your character, it doesn't matter how virtuously you lived. They're telling a lie. Is this what is happening? We will never know (unless someone changes their story, i.e. Ford says she remembers who the assaulter was and it wasn't Kavanaugh, or Kavanaugh says actually it was me). But this idea of lying about an individual's character for political gain would occur no matter your virtuosity. Could it potentially be less effective? Maybe. But in this time and age where any sexual assault allegation, no matter the severity or amount of details, is taken at full face value, then a presumed virtuous character goes out the window.

I don't think they would absolutely believe it. I think they'd say it was a lie to try to make the sexual assault allegation less believable. That never touching a sip of alcohol is so unlikely in this day and time, and the argument of "come on, every teenager tries some alcohol once". I just don't see it standing up against public opinion the way you do. But alas, it doesn't really matter since this isn't something Kavanaugh is trying to defend.

Can they be supported though? Besides her own account of his alleged drunkenness?

I see what you're saying, and I don't disagree with your logic. I just don't think the media/dems would follow this logic.

But whether he drank or not is a small mechanism for the actual act that they are concerned about: sexual assault. They don't care about the mechanisms/scenarios surrounding the actual act (hence why the details of Ford's recollection are not so imperative to the media). All they care about is the fact that she accused him of sexual assault. Everything else is irrelevant. So even if he claimed he never drank, that would not diminish the left's argument that he's a rapist/threat to society.

I don't think this would hold up, just based on the fact that this same argument could be used for the fact that he said he's never once behaved in such a reprehensible manner. That is what "he" says, "she" says otherwise. The same would play out in this scenario. "She" says he drunkenly forced (insert sexual assault details here). "He" says he never drank one bit in his life, thus this scenario could not have happened. "She" says otherwise. I see the logic of your statements, but nothing in this scenario is working off of logic. It is working off of a he-said she-said scenario.

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Agreed. I wasn't expecting it.

https://www.cnbc.com/2018/09/25/republicans-hire-female-sex-prosecutor-to-grill-kavanaugh-and-accuser-ford.html The arguments for why they shouldn't have a sex crimes prosecutor on this senate hearing is incredibly entertaining. You want an FBI investigation done so that all the correct facts are collected and examined, but you don't want a prosecutor who specializes in sex crimes to question both Kavanaugh and Ford? Wouldn't you rather someone with expert experience in the field of sex crimes to ask the more pertinent questions regarding this accusation? Rather than a Senate full of individuals with little to no expert knowledge in this area, beyond the layman's understanding of what is important to question? Also, her identity was revealed and it's a female prosecutor. I wonder what the likelihood is of Ford appearing now.

Wow, harsh don't you think? @LatterDSaint, I thought I'd throw my 2 cents in just in case you wanted another perspective, but a lot of people have said similar things. Your visa status here is contingent upon you being a student--if you desire to serve a mission, consider this scenario without the other factors at hand (having to leave America, etc.). Just ask the Lord plainly (if you desire to) if you should serve a mission. He will guide you in the right direction. If that direction leads to a mission, great. If that direction leads to staying at BYU to finish school, great. Either way, you are the only person that can obtain revelation for yourself on that topic. For your *girlfriend, I would echo what @JohnsonJones mentioned: that quote by President Kimball was directed towards young men. Young women are encouraged to serve if they desire to do so, but there is no requirement. That doesn't mean you need to go tell your *girlfriend this, because that needs to be her own decision. But just for clarification on your end. PLEASE do not think that you cannot marry a woman who has served a mission just because you haven't. If someone has said something similar to this, disregard everything you heard about it. Any 2 worthy people can make a marriage work--RM status has nothing to do with it. Does a mission help teach you so many things? Yes, absolutely. But there are plenty of members who never served a mission (both male and female) who are in strong, healthy marriages. If your *girlfriend continues on with her life, and serving a mission, then you keep going on with yours. If you get back together before she starts her mission then it's up to you two if you want to still be exclusive while she is gone. But do what will make you happy. I hope you find clarity in your situation!

He has children from multiple marriages and I believe my mother's step siblings would prefer to not have his work done. My mother is the only member. Actually sorry I got the details wrong. Long story short, she remarried another man, then they got divorced. But then became close again years later up until her death--so most likely she would want to be sealed to him if given a choice. He is still living, so we would have to get permission later on after his death to do his work. Also not sure how that works with sealing my mother to them. But for now that answers my question--we'll probably have to wait a little bit to do her sealing ordinance to get that figured out. Thanks for everyone's help!

Other things stand in the way besides her lack of desire to be sealed to him--we don't have permission to do his work. Just looking to see if there was anything we could do to seal my grandmother to us.

Thank you!

We are hesitant to do so as their divorce was for reasons of abuse, and would be something my grandmother would have highly disapproved of if discussed during her earthly life.

I don't know the answer to this so I'm turning to the sage wisdom on this forum.. My grandmother (my mother's Mom) passed away October of last year (was not a member) and is legally divorced from her past husband (who is deceased and also not a member). We are looking to perform all her ordinance work once October comes around. Since there's no one to seal her to, is there any logistical way to seal her to our family? How does that all work for that ordinance? Haven't ever thought of a scenario like this one. Thanks in advance for any answers.

They are not losing their education. If in this circumstance BYU decides to pull their endorsement for attending the university, they have many other school options available to them to continue their schooling that don't require that specific type of endorsement. The BYU Honor Code is signed by all students attending BYU before they start their studies, which entails agreeing to the codes of conduct within it. When broken, it could potentially result in losing your endorsement to attend the university for a time being. You break the rules, you have to deal with the consequences. In this individual's situation, there is no guarantee that they will lose their endorsement. But if that be the case, their education is not lost.

Why does he need to disclose something to his bishop that he's repented of and worked out with a previous bishop years ago?

It is a wonderful place! The Gospel Principles manual has a lot to offer in terms of learning the basics of the LDS religion. If you'd like to learn more, you can find missionaries in your region that can help walk you through those basics via lessons and answer any questions/thoughts you might have along the way! https://www.mormon.org/missionaries

Eek---don't think this post was all that appropriate considering the amount of information given. Could he be everything you have just said? Yep. Could he be a frustrated husband that came to a forum to vent his frustrations, which included emphasizing the things he was upset about? Thus glossing over other details that would fill in the picture a little more clearly? Also yep. Looks like this OP just needed some extra words of wisdom to not go straight down the divorce path just yet. Not a scolding lecture from someone who knows .01% of this individual's life and marriage. Sometimes we're all a little too quick to judge a post and make assumptions that aren't really warranted. I think your post has some great insight, but given with the assumption that you know exactly who this man is in his own marriage. Which is far from the case.

Yeah they're pretty cool! I appreciated learning what it meant to earn money for something like tuition. Making those payments every semester was not easy, so it really put things into perspective. I did go to a fairly inexpensive university (about on par with BYU's tuition), so obviously that was manageable.

My parents paid for the first year for myself and my siblings, then the rest was up to us. Although they did allow us to live at home if we chose to go to our hometown university.