Chilean

I understand your view on the actual topic but I have also seen people divorce and actually ended with someone who loved them MORE. Who are now more happy then they ever were before.
My uncle was cheated on after having many children. He was willing to forgive but his wife wanted to stay with her affair partner. He went into a deep depression and I saw him suffer. Despite his sadness he never stopped working and kept up paying two houses. He was eventually introduced to a medical doctor and today he is very happy, she loves him sooo much. They are happily married, it is good to see him smile again. 
While I don't discount the power of reconciliation I have also seen the power of entirely new blessings. 

Yeah, there’s a whole pattern of questionable behavior here that underlies the actual act of adultery.  Why’s he going to bars?  Why’s he doing shots?  Why’s he spending recreational time with a woman who knows him, (presumably) knows his marital status and yet views him as a prospective sex partner?  If he has time for drinking, why doesn’t he have time for an after-school part-time job?
Church members who have never partaken of alcohol seem to treat inebriation as an instantaneous, unexpected and mysterious experience; and it’s natural to want to cut drunk people a break.  But I’m on the fence as to whether alcohol tends to obscure or reveal a person’s true nature; and being in the business of cleaning up the messes created by intoxicated people, I’m not inclined to be particularly charitable.

Having never been drunk, I have often wondered at the way being drunk constitutes an exculpation of sorts. I don't get it. If a man gets drunk and kills someone in a car accident, it seems to me that he's more guilty of wrongdoing, not less. If you intentionally impair your judgment, you are asking for bad things to happen. How is it, then, that being drunk or high or otherwise impaired (by your own hand) is used to try to lessen responsibility?
I am not trying to condemn this man's drunken mistake. I just don't see why being drunk should somehow count in his favor.

Here you go:
 
What y'all call "covering up" is the Canon Law process of seclusion (pretty much the same as putting the guy in jail except jail is not just a holding cell... seclusion is where the priest goes through the reconciliation process to save his soul while being prevented from having access to the public).  In the Philippines, the law recognizes monasteries as qualified institutions to conduct a house arrest for criminal priests while remaining under the jurisdiction of the Philippine justice system.  No such thing exists in US Law.  Therefore, they call it "hiding the priest".
The Catholic Church doesn't call them "crimes" rather they call them "sin".  Crimes are secular judgments.  Lying to your mother may not be a crime, but it is a sin and would have Canon Law consequences (may need to confess to the priest and get absolution).  Sexual predation is a mortal sin - that is, the consequence of which is eternal burning in the fires of hell, especially for somebody that has made the covenant to God to minister to his flock.  It is, therefore, the primary objective of the Catholic Church to save that man's soul as well as the soul of the victims.
Remember, the Catholic Church is not just a religious institution.  It is also a system of government.

I have also forgiven my ex husband, long time ago. I divorced him anyway of course before truly forgiven him I think.   BUT if I would have to choose all over again... I think... I'm 100% sure I would choose to divorce him again, because during that time I learned so much about myself, about the atonement, about single parenting, about friendship, about dating (I married him when I was 18 yo).  I just learned so much. and the experiences it gave me, going through his cheating and the divorce made me the person, the mom, the woman and the wife I am today. I learned to also be closer to the Lord, and how to help others going through the same experiences I went through, and I'm thankful I experienced those things so I can comfort those that need comfort.
I do not recommend divorce at all, because it will be one of the hardest things anyone can go through, but I cant lie and say you wont learn anything from it, because you WILL learn, and it will make you stronger.
I think the lady MormonGator is referencing never healed completely... because when I first read the comment I felt she hasn't forgiven herself for choosing to divorce the husband,  she didn't break their family,  HE DID when he decided to sleep with someone else. She still has some healing to do as she looks at the breakage of her family as being her fault.
Before my divorce I prayed and fasted many times, and went to the temple, the first couple of answers I got were: "Yes, but not yet". So I waited, and stayed until the answered changed.
It's a very VERY personal matter, between you and the Lord. And we cant judge others for staying or for leaving.
 

Forgiving someone doesn't mean staying with them so they can hurt you again. Some people are truly sick mentally and spiritually. 
You have the right to breathe out your opinions and I have the right to tell you I am not a fan of 50% of them. 

Glad I am not the only one that has had wifey issues... 😉
Ok, I wish I were the only one that had that challenge.  Love has certainly had its challenges.
When I found out of my wife's emotional affair, I was devastated.  The hardest thing I had to go through.  There was a huge part of me that wanted to cut and run.  But after prayer, the answer was to love her and forgive her.  I don't expect her to return to church any time soon.  She isn't anti mormon, but just doesn't think it has what she needs.
That leaves me with what about our eternal marriage..  I have this strong feeling that all will work out if I do my part.  And my part is loving my wife.  Looking for the good in her everyday.  Serving her everyday.
I suspect you have felt many of the same things I have and probably to a much harder degree.  Keep loving her.  Kindness and a gentle heart.
I have found the more effort I put into loving her, the less pain I have.  I think that is part of the forgiveness process.  You will probably never forget the events, but the pain gets erased.  And happiness can return.  And your mind dwells on good things not the negative.  And I think that is what is meant by you remember them no more.

Hi priesthoodpower - wow - I didn't know your story until now!  
If there is one thing I know, it's that divorced LDS guys can have it very tough.  Their fellow saints reject them, ignore them, look awkwardly away from them, let friendships with them grow stale and die.  I'm glad you've found a place to find advice/comfort/prayers/etc.  It's part of our dang baptismal covenant for pete's sake, although many of us just can't hack it for a guy in your situation.
So, let me say some things I can genuinely say:
* I'm glad to hear of your love for your soon-to-arrive kid.  Life might be more complicated for him/her than the next kid over, but I'm sure you'll do your best to do right by the kiddo.  I know folks in intact homes with uncaring parents, and they've got problems you might be able to help kiddo avoid.
* Being able to access such stories - the good and the bad, the right and the wrong, the behaviors and the consequences - I know it helps people looking at similar paths.  One of the good things I did for my marriage two decades ago, was follow the story of a guy who agonized over his for months until finally divorcing.  I am able to be a better husband and father because I was able to learn from his successes and failures.  I'm sure your story can help others.  We never know everyone who reads this stuff.
* Agency is what it is.  You have the power, the right, the duty, and the responsibility to walk your side of the road to the best of your ability.  If you do that, no matter the choices of others in the picture, God isn't asking any more than that.
God bless you!

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What about the guy who imprisons his wife in his house because he cares so much for her he couldn't bear to see her get hurt.  Is that Love?  How about the guy who loves his girlfriend so much he went to have sex with her before marriage.  Is that Love?
So, when Christ gave the commandment to Love One Another, you believe that means you have to get to know everyone and connect with everyone on a personal level?
Let me present to you the TRUE meaning of Love.  Love is that desire - humble and honest and pure - to bring people closer to Christ.  A person who pledges their love for someone while engaging in sexual intercourse outside of marriage has no Love for that person as they have no problem pulling that person away from Christ.  So, a person shot up some people in Jacksonville, Florida over the weekend.  I can honestly tell you I love the shooter even as I hate, nay, abhor, the act that he did.  I love the shooter because I hope and pray that he finds his way to Christ in the Spirit World.  It is the only thing I can do for him.  Crazy, huh?

You aren't strange. Serving a mission really helped me develop the gift of love. Am I perfect? Nope. Is my love tough at times? Absolutely. It is possible to love someone a million miles away. Try praying for someone and for help developing your gift.

As stated above, we are only getting 50% of the story, so I am going to move forward with the premise that only 50% of what you are saying is true.  Even if 100% of what you are saying is true, my advice doesn't change:
Both of you together visit  your Bishop and ask him for advice.  He should send you to a qualified marriage and family therapist.   He will ask you if you are living the gospel, reading the scriptures together and individually, praying together, and keeping your temple covenants.  Be ready to answer this truthfully either you are or you are not.  He cannot "make" you feel, you choose how you feel.   Remember you cannot change him, you can only change yourself.   Is he providing for you?  Is there a future plan for you and your family 5 yrs, 10 yrs? What are you doing to bring yourself closer to him physically?  Flirting, kissing, cute outfits?  It's a two way street. Your husbands participation is key in the above.  If he declines to participate, then that is an indicator that things aren't going to work.  But only an indicator.  
After you have visited and counseled with your bishop, after you have visited with the MFT (more than once) and taken both of the advice of both, and after you have looked in the mirror and evaluated yourself honestly, only then are you ready to make any sort of decision for divorce.  
Please ignore all the advice above about Porn, and how the Savior taught that divorce is OK.  

I'm Filipino.  It's hard to imagine the kind of poverty that exists in some parts of the Philippines.  But over and over I hear this refrain - "I will go through the same hardship over and over and even worse and still have my children".  Being a mother/father is the greatest glory in all the darkness.  Being a mother/father is the greatest honor.  I have a feeling your mother felt the same.
It's sad that the Feminist movement hasn't promoted this one truth... when 1st graders and Beauty Queens say things like, "I want to be a Scientist, an Engineer, a Fireman, a Doctor, a Princess"... they're aspiring for a lower calling than the greatest ambition... "I want to be a Mother".  
This calling may not be in the cards for you.  Not all women can be biological Mothers even as they are all Mothers.  A Mother is, after all, not just someone who births babies but also those who raise children in all righteousness.  But it is wrong for you to take that great glory and honor away from your Mother and think she'd have more joy pursuing a lesser dream than she has accomplished.

So sorry to hear this katie.  Hope you get the help you need and may you feel the love of the Savior.
Here's my 2 cents:
These are the wrong questions.  I believe your question should be - How can I bring my husband and I closer to Christ?  That's what matters.  If he has to get ex-communicated to bring him closer to Christ, then that's what he needs to do.  If your family and friends have to know to get him and yourself closer to Christ then that's what needs to happen.  Trying to "save yourself from shame and heartbreak" is not going to do good if it leads you and your husband farther from Christ.
What happens now?  Go help your husband find his way back to Christ.  The best person to show you that path is your bishop.
The Atonement of Christ is ultimately the light at the end of this tunnel... find your way there.  Yes, it is going to be difficult - but it will be all worth it.  We're cheering for you!

I think you misunderstood my comment.  I'm saying CNN spews plenty of Trump hate already.  It isn't necessary to come here to talk about it further, if one were so inclined.

The country that literally has me holding my breath (no popcorn- I couldn't stomach it) is Venezuela. I have a sweet friend there who hasn't been on facebook for too long and it really worries me. Last I heard she was pleading for prayers for her country and was short on food. 😟

I meant it to be trolly... which is funny to me. 
If I do get too trolly, you're welcome to bop me on the head.

You do know that Fox is MSM right?

OK whatever. This isn't worth the argument. I will keep my conclusions to myself. 

The greater context is... It is made up of flawed human beings.  Like all other organizations are.  So when the media wants to do a hit piece on an organization all they have to do is find flawed humans doing flawed things.  Then they trot them out as the norm, as the culture, as something to blot out all other things, so you do not hear about the good it does,  about the faithful and hard working that are helping people day in an day out.
This is not just the way it works for the Catholic church, it used against any and all.  Because scandal sells.
 

A long time ago we had a pair of missionaries, one from Samoa - big guy built like a line backer - and the other a Brazilian - short guy that looked like bobblehead, he was so skinny.  We took them to Cici's pizza (all you can eat pizza place) and both missionaries ate with gusto.  My husband and I were done after the 2nd plate but these guys were still going.  Every trip they put the equivalent of an entire pizza on their plate.  And by about the 5th plate the Samoan was done.  The skinny Brazilian kept on going and we all watched in amazement as he came back with his 10th plate... 

Disciplinary meetings, disfellowship, and excommunion are necessary for our spiritual growth, when we have done very stupid/wrong things. After we've done stupid stuff,  what can help us get closer to the Savior's atoning power is getting all those privileges taken from us.
Our life here on Earth is a test, is a test of faith and obedience, where we get to taste sweet and sour. Life is not easy, and yes, sometimes it is require for us to go, in a very small percentage, through gethsemane. The Savior already experience our heartaches, and paid the price for our sins, and the only thing require from us is a broken heart and a contrite spirit. By doing that, we will be able to comprehend things, we will be able to understand that those men, yes, human men, are priesthood holder, and are acting as if the Lord was there judging us, because they only desire for us to be happy, to truly feel joy again.
Sinning does not bring joy, and by reaching out for help, and talking to our bishops and stake presidents, and going through whatever church disciplinary meeting we have to, it WILL bring joy to our lives again, after going through hell for a little bit.  Isn't one minute of pain worth a lifetime of glory?
The Gospel is true. What is asked of us by the Savior is a broken heart and a contrite spirit, how are you planning on obtaining that to offer to the Lord? yes, sometimes is does require for us to feel ashamed, to feel broken, to feel alone, BECAUSE that's when the wonderful power of the atonement takes place in our lives, and it changes us forever, and then that broken heart and contrite spirit are ready to be offer as a sacrifice.
 
 
 

This church is NOT just a place where you am come and become a better person, any church can do that. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the Kingdom of God upon the earth. President Nelson is the prophet and he speaks on behalf of God. So you ask what authority does the church have?
The church has the same authority God has.

Only to determine whether a person:
1) Should partake of the sacrament (though I don't see how anyone could physically stop you even if you were instructed not to)
2) Hold a temple recommend / participate in temple ordinances
3) Serve in callings or say prayers in church meetings
4) Receive / advance in the priesthood (for men)
...the end.
No.  The two have nothing to do with each other.  You seem to believe otherwise (based on posts elsewhere in this forum), but you're wrong.  Beyond the fact that all churches have to register as such with the government in order to be tax-exempt (or perhaps for other reasons in various countries), the two are still entirely distinct.
It is to have your name removed from Church records and your priesthood authority (for men) and temple blessings revoked.  It is, in one sense, to make you a non-member.
Whatever "silent treatment" or alienation you feel, it is either imagined, caused by differing expectations (yours vs. your ward members), or localized (there are some awful people in your ward), or whatever I'm not thinking of.  It isn't something I would call a normal experience.  And no, it would not be part of official Church discipline (see the first answer I posted).  Church discipline is about helping the sinner to bring their life into alignment with the teachings of Christ and not making matters worse by unworthily participating in sacred ordinances.  It isn't about punishment, it isn't public, and it certainly doesn't include ignoring a member.
"untie yourself from the lamb's book of life"?  I suggest studying the scriptures regarding the book of life.
"list of names"? Moroni 6:4  - essentially.
Doomed to hell?  Again, I recommend you study the scriptures and do your best to follow them and the Spirit to the best of your ability and understanding.  In Mormon theology, one has to try pretty hard to earn a permanent place in hell.
And now, I'm going to be blunt.  There's whopping tons of anger in a lot of your posts.  This is harming you (and only you) immensely.  For your own sake, figure out how to let it go, regardless of whether it's justified.  There are several things in your posts which sound bizarre - like no experience I've ever had in the Church and like nothing I've heard from others.  Others just sound bizarre or incomprehensible, regardless of Church or no church - to the point where I wonder if English is your native language and/or whether you come from a country other than the US (in other words, I'm looking for a way to explain why much of the content of your posts is incomprehensible to me).  My conclusion, considering the whole of it, is that it seems like you need the help of a professional counselor / therapist / psychologist / psychiatrist - something along those lines.  I don't think this forum or even your fellow ward members (even without the problems you've described in posts to these forums) could help with everything you appear to need.  (I could be all wrong.  All I know is what I've read here, and there's no guarantee I'm understanding correctly - and as I've said, there's a lot in your posts that I just plain don't understand.)

Yes, your mission might be the toughest thing you'll ever do, but it will also be the greatest thing! You'll have to deal with companions that are difficult, people rejecting you, wards that don't help missionaries. BUT also you'll meet the greatest people ever! and you'll be able to be part of their lives!   
The Gospel is true. and everyone needs to be onboard proclaiming its truths. You know, we were saved to come to Earth at these times, during these very difficult times when people are tossed everywhere, with different claims, and ideologies, and I see every day how people need to know about their Savior that loves them, about a God that is right there listening to them, ANSWERING PRAYERS!
I didn't served a mission... instead I got married, and ... yes... I look back always wondering why I didn't served. I have great kids, and I love them, but yes, I wish I would've served.  I'm a ward missionary, and I try to help us much as I can! Because I love the Gospel. Yes, Joseph Smith did see Heavenly Father and Jesus, and they talked to Him, the Book of Mormon is true, and the Priesthood, the very same power that Jesus had when he was on Earth, has been restored, brought back to Earth for our happiness, for us to be able to make covenants with God once more.
My husband and I are getting out of debt (we have just a house and car) because we will serve a mission when we retire. haha he's 38 and I'm 31, lol, yes, we have about 30 years before we serve, but we want to be ready now. 
Please, let us know where you are called to serve! (I live in the Macon, GA mission, and if we ever meet, I'm the spunkiest Chilean ever )
Take care my brotha'