A dying breed

[Qtpie]

Why are worthy preisthood holders a dying breed?

I was just on an lds chat site, and 5 guys in a row that i talked to for about 2 minutes of talking have shown they were only interested in one thing...........

I can't stand all the double standards!

Only sunday mormans!

not that i am excluding my own gender from this mess, but it is infuriating!!

Here i am raised to expect a worthy priest hood holder, and yet everywhere i turn i get the same excuse..."It's hard." well my gosh it's just as hard for you as it is for anyone... We are all faced with the same media, music, clothing standards, and vulgar jokes blasted in our faces, but so what?

If I could give to them the feelings of my heart with the intensity that I feel for the gosple, then maybe they would understand. It makes my soul hurt to think that 1/3 already rejected heavenly fathers plan, and that another 50 percent of us will be foolish "virgins"...

The wrost part was when i mentioned this in the chat room everyone took it so casually... no one was really upset.

I understand that we are all gods children and everyone has an opportunity to repent.

but it's like a light bulb... they are used to provide light... you have to replace your light bulbs in order to keep you light, to me that is what fast and testimony meeting are for.... you can always get a new light bulb, but some people take that light bulb and crush it and grope around in the dark...

grrrrrrrrrrrr

anyways now that I have vented i feel much better....please leave you comments.. I do like hearing form other people....

thanks

Qtpie

[a-train]

Oh they are out there. Don't fret.

-a-train

[WillowTheWhisp]

My teenage daughter is of much the same opinion as yourself. She has had two LD boyfriends both of whom left a lot to be desired and one other LDS boy chatting her up constantly is saying things she just doesn't want to hear. The most respectful boy she knows is a non-member. I find that very sad.

[applepansy]

My daughter is running into the same thing. And you know those young men President Hinckley has talked about for several years in conferrence? Well, two of them are my sons. I don't understand why they choose to stray and I'm their mother.

applepansy

[gabelpa]

My daughter is running into the same thing. And you know those young men President Hinckley has talked about for several years in conferrence? Well, two of them are my sons. I don't understand why they choose to stray and I'm their mother.

applepansy

Sound beatings. You didn't beat them soundly enough, often enough. Time to make up for your lax discipline, a few half-day beatings should straighten them out. Maybe one of them will leave home afterwards.

[Jbs2763]

I strayed for a number of years doing all sorts of silly things i greatly regret...and the only permanent reminder i have of those days are some tattoos, alot of my friends growing up strayed too, out of my ym/yw group...seems like only about half stayed true all the way growing up..if that....but.... on the bright side...about half of us that strayed have made our way back, granted we are a little scared, some of us have kids, and some of us have spent a night or two in lock up.

There are still decent guys out there, I'm at the "senior" end of the YSA world, and most of guys i am freinds with in my branch are worthy, but not all of us are innocent. Maybe online chats aren't the best place to meet someone, I was invovled in a couple LDS dating sites for quite a while...seemingly all the girls I met were NCMO chicks.... i guess it is signs of the times.

However I do have 2 good friends that have met worthy guys on these dating sights, and both are getting married this summer...

[applepansy]

Sound beatings. You didn't beat them soundly enough, often enough. Time to make up for your lax discipline, a few half-day beatings should straighten them out. Maybe one of them will leave home afterwards.

Dang! I knew it had to be my fault!

One is out, I'm still working on the 24yo moving out (for the 2nd time)

[NeuroTypical]

Why are worthy preisthood holders a dying breed?

I was just on an lds chat site...

I think I've found one problem. It's not that they're a dying breed, it's that chat rooms are the online version of a swing bar. It's not where you go when you want to find the cream of the LDS crop. (I should know - I've spent enough time in them! )

LM

[gabelpa]

I think I've found one problem. It's not that they're a dying breed, it's that chat rooms are the online version of a swing bar. It's not where you go when you want to find the cream of the LDS crop. (I should know - I've spent enough time in them! )

LM

well I am gonna disagree with that - I found the cream of the crop in a chatroom lol and what about FunkyTown huh?

Seriously though I think its always been an issue that some priesthood holders don't respect what they have, and I don't think its new as Sisters I think its important we make marrying a good man more important than getting married and making sure when we do it we do it right. And that may well mean waiting until we are over the hill and at least 20 lol before we start complaining and moaning. I know some amazing young men, and YSA men who are strong and respect their preisthood

And more importantly placing that kind of man at the top of the agenda.

-Charley

[rameumptom]

Joseph Smith prophecied that the last days would be very difficult, and that sexual sin would be one of the biggest issues.

Be patient, make sure you prepare yourself and serve God as you know you should, and he will prepare the way....in time.

[beefche]

Here's how I look at it (a single woman who is older than 20 yrs old--no, you CAN'T ask me exactly how old ):

First and foremost, I must be the person I want to be. I have to work on myself--keep myself clean, spiritual, happy, have fun, have real interests, etc. I can only change myself.

Second, I think we, women, do a real disservice to men when we say things like "there are no good men" or "all men stink" or whatever. No, not all men are bad...no, not all men have low morals...no, not all men are.... Remember these are sons of God you are speaking of. Having bad experiences with a few doesn't not equal that all men are that way.

Finally, there are tons of good men out there. I haven't found one who is right for me...but many, many of my friends have found them. Single LDS men are human. No one is perfect and I cannot expect any man to be "perfect" for me. He will have flaws and weaknesses. I respect men and I really respect men who honor their covenants and are loyal. I, personally, have chosen to remain single unless I can find a man who is worthy to marry me in the temple. My choice does not mean that there aren't good Christian men out there. There are...I am just choosing to narrow my choices down even further.

So, in essence...learn from your experiences. Learn what you truly want in a man and seek after those things in the men with whom you interact. Work on yourself and know that God is aware of you.

[beefche]

Oh, and another thought. Each man you meet is not going to be your eternal companion. So, I try to think of my interactions as a moment to show forth God's love. In cases of my male friends who have strayed, I look at my interactions as a positive reinforcement of the Gospel and hopefully allows them to know of my testimony. Not that I preach to them every time I talk to them...but you can testify to others without using the words "in the name of Jesus Christ, amen." Reaffirming truth, talking about uplifting things, mentioning your activities at church can be a testimony.

[Qtpie]

it's not that I think all men are bad. It's not that I don't think I will find a worthy preisthood holder...It just makes me hurt to think that for one most of these guys I am talking about are from utah...the biggest morman capital in the world. Not that I am trying to be sterotypical or anything. guys are like that all over the place... but I know that we are children of of god..all of us...and therefore we are brothers and sisters...and well If they could fathom what they are giving up on for fleeting moment of pleasure then...

I don't hate guys, in fact I like them and hope to find one to spend eternity with. I am by no stretch of the imagination perfect, and I don't expect someone perfect, but I just ache for them that have fallen, and can't seem to, or don't want to find their way back.

thanks for you comment beefchee, it put things in a bit o a different perspective for me.

[Dravin]

It just makes me hurt to think that for one most of these guys I am talking about are from utah...the biggest morman capital in the world.

Well, one of the issues with Utah is there is a lot of societal pressure to be Mormon (or at least continue being such) even if it isn't what you actually believe, it is a lot easier to be a Sunday Mormon than to be an inactive Mormon, in areas where it isn't so pervasive if you don't have a testimony its easier be an inactive Mormon then to be a Sunday Mormon.

There is my 2 cents worth of pop psychology.

[beefche]

it's not that I think all men are bad. It's not that I don't think I will find a worthy preisthood holder...It just makes me hurt to think that for one most of these guys I am talking about are from utah...the biggest morman capital in the world. Not that I am trying to be sterotypical or anything. guys are like that all over the place... but I know that we are children of of god..all of us...and therefore we are brothers and sisters...and well If they could fathom what they are giving up on for fleeting moment of pleasure then...

I don't hate guys, in fact I like them and hope to find one to spend eternity with. I am by no stretch of the imagination perfect, and I don't expect someone perfect, but I just ache for them that have fallen, and can't seem to, or don't want to find their way back.

thanks for you comment beefchee, it put things in a bit o a different perspective for me.

I'm sorry, QT, I didn't make myself clear. I wasn't aiming my posts directly at you...your posts just reminded me of other threads (here and elsewhere) where it got to be more of a man bashing thread.

It is sad when any one of God's children strays. And it's disheartening when I find out that the one I'm interested in getting to know more is one who has strayed and has no desire to change.

[LolaBella]

I think we as members are brought up to look for almost near perfection in a man so if we dont find someone that meets these unfeasible standards we start to panic. People are human. Willows comment said it all....a non member is more respectful and its almost like a surprise...there are good people who aren't church members!!!! In fact most of the non members I know are more open minded and less judgmental than anyone in my ward. Members are just people, guys included. You will NEVER find a PERFECT man QTpie!!! Find someone you LOVE and who loves you. Thats whats most important.

[OneEternalSonata]

Valiant men are not a dying breed. They are a breed in progress. Mortality is the changing room of eternity, for in this life men must prepare to meet God. I submit that understanding goes a long way. However, every man should live in chastity to the fullness of his might and ability, supplicating for further change in heart with the Lord daily. A high standard, yes, but worth every ounce of labor and faith.

[Islander]

. Members are just people, guys included. You will NEVER find a PERFECT man QTpie!!! Find someone you LOVE and who loves you. Thats whats most important.

I understand the concept but one must be careful with generalizations. High standards are not anywhere near perfection and the two should not be confused.

Love will never be enough. You need someone that has demonstrated righteousness, faithfulness, devotion, integrity, reliability, charity. In my book, "love" is quite a very elusive concept which can not be attained initially in the relationship.

If one is a convert then we must just form an opinion about this person based on the time of conversion. But I can not ignore the realities of life and the past of someone who has been a ife long member. By far, that would be the best indicator of future behavior. Appealing as it may be, 170 years of experience tell us that dating and marrying non-members is not a sound practice.

So, yeah, avoid being a perfectionist but KNOW what you are looking for and decide before hand. That way if you stumble onto it you can recognize it.

[lilered]

From my perspective: I work with the youth of our ward. I am pretty close and familiar to most of the youth in our ward. I have been with them on campouts, temple trips, activities, and in church teaching them. In my judgement, there are about 1/2 of the youth that have strong testimonies, set good examples, and I would not have any problem with allowing either my son or daughter dating them. Some even at their young age, will be grea leaders, because they have all ready shown they have that quality. The other half +-, are in between no testimony, poor scripture knowledge, etc. and they would be the ones that I would be concerned about if they were to date members of my family. Of the 1/2 that I believe are stalwart in the gospel, most will go on a mission, some have already earned their Duty To God Award and/or Eagle Scout.

My point, they are out there, they just don't have the time to spend in chat rooms because they are too busy with sports, school, church and wholesome activities.

[InnerGold]

They might be rare but they still exist. Go to the temple on any given morning and you will see youth lining up doing baptisms for the dead.

There is hope.

[RachelleDrew]

Looking for worthy men to marry in Utah can actually be quite difficult. As Dravin mentioned, it's much easier to be a Sunday Mormon and avoid the pressure and criticism that unfortunately exists.

While there aren't as many members where I live, the ratio of inactive members to active ones is much lower than what I see in like Idaho or Utah.

I'm sure it's frustrating, just keep looking.

[Clarity_over_agreement]

Its all about the REFERRALS Qtpie

In missionary work the best baptisms are referrals and the best guys you will most likely find by getting referrals from people that have similar traits that you are looking for in a guy.

Also pray that you will find that type of guy, tell God that it is in his hands and that you want him to direct you to a worthy man and to direct a worthy man to you. You should tell him that you trust his judgement. Dont try to force anything, if you do this with complete trust and reliance on the Lord he will literally be given to you on a silver platter.

Edited April 8, 2009 by Clarity_over_agreement

[jadams_4040]

Why are worthy preisthood holders a dying breed?

I was just on an lds chat site, and 5 guys in a row that i talked to for about 2 minutes of talking have shown they were only interested in one thing...........

I can't stand all the double standards!

Only sunday mormans!

not that i am excluding my own gender from this mess, but it is infuriating!!

Here i am raised to expect a worthy priest hood holder, and yet everywhere i turn i get the same excuse..."It's hard." well my gosh it's just as hard for you as it is for anyone... We are all faced with the same media, music, clothing standards, and vulgar jokes blasted in our faces, but so what?

If I could give to them the feelings of my heart with the intensity that I feel for the gosple, then maybe they would understand. It makes my soul hurt to think that 1/3 already rejected heavenly fathers plan, and that another 50 percent of us will be foolish "virgins"...

The wrost part was when i mentioned this in the chat room everyone took it so casually... no one was really upset.

I understand that we are all gods children and everyone has an opportunity to repent.

but it's like a light bulb... they are used to provide light... you have to replace your light bulbs in order to keep you light, to me that is what fast and testimony meeting are for.... you can always get a new light bulb, but some people take that light bulb and crush it and grope around in the dark...

grrrrrrrrrrrr

anyways now that I have vented i feel much better....please leave you comments.. I do like hearing form other people....

thanks

Qtpie

We all {and yourself} have been repeatedly warned about hanging on to the rod of the gospel; it isnt easy and it wont ever get easy; There are many very worthy and spiritual young men out there; dont forget that, satan would have you beleive otherwise.:)

[Moksha]

It's not where you go when you want to find the cream of the LDS crop.

LM

For that you need to go to LDS.net

[StallionMcBeastly]

it's not that I think all men are bad. It's not that I don't think I will find a worthy preisthood holder...It just makes me hurt to think that for one most of these guys I am talking about are from utah...the biggest morman capital in the world. Not that I am trying to be sterotypical or anything. guys are like that all over the place... but I know that we are children of of god..all of us...and therefore we are brothers and sisters...and well If they could fathom what they are giving up on for fleeting moment of pleasure then...

I don't hate guys, in fact I like them and hope to find one to spend eternity with. I am by no stretch of the imagination perfect, and I don't expect someone perfect, but I just ache for them that have fallen, and can't seem to, or don't want to find their way back.

thanks for you comment beefchee, it put things in a bit o a different perspective for me.

I share many of your frustrations with the young women as well. My girlfriend (she's a good one) said that many of the girls at girls camp were talking about the guys that they had slept with.

It makes me sick to think about because there is nothing I like more in a woman than a chaste one who honors her virtue and calling as a daughter of God.

P.S. it's Mormon