For how long?

[ozl89]

For how long did You date your husband/wife before you got married? And did you have sex before you got married?

[Dravin]

For how long did You date your husband/wife before you got married?

We dated for a little over a year, and were engaged for 4 months.

And did you have sex before you got married?

No.

[Vort]

What? The mods are letting this one live?

18 months, and no.

[Dravin]

What? The mods are letting this one live?

If you feel a post violates the rules please report it and explain your concerns.

[Vort]

If you feel a post violates the rules please report it and explain your concerns.

Oh, I'm not complaining, just surprised. I made a bet with myself, which it appears I will lose.

[Leah]

For how long did You date your husband/wife before you got married? And did you have sex before you got married?

Why do you want to know?

[annewandering]

I am surprised any one would ask let alone answer.

[Dravin]

Why do you want to know?

Probably curiosity over LDS norms, or at least less Sweden centered LDS norms.

[ozl89]

Because I've met a guy, claiming to be mormon. ( I found my faith before I met him) And he is pushing me, he wants to take the next step. And I really like him but, I don't want to do it. So, I just wanted to know cos, I don't feel like it should be the right thing to do.

[ozl89]

And I'm sorry if I offended anyone, not what I ment to do.

[Vort]

And I'm sorry if I offended anyone, not what I ment to do.

I doubt you offended anyone. Stay strong and live your covenants.

[Leah]

Because I've met a guy, claiming to be mormon. ( I found my faith before I met him) And he is pushing me, he wants to take the next step. And I really like him but, I don't want to do it. So, I just wanted to know cos, I don't feel like it should be the right thing to do.

If you are Mormon, then you know that having sex outside of marriage is wrong. If he is Mormon (why are you not sure that he is?), then he also knows that it is wrong.

If you don't want to do it, then don't. Any guy who would push you to have sex - especially when it is agains what you both have been taught - is not a guy you want - or need - to be with.

Edited July 24, 2012 by Leah

[Connie]

Hi ozl89.

I see you are new to everything. Welcome!

The LDS church teaches the law of chastity which includes the command to not have sex before marriage.

Have a great day and stay true to the faith.

[Dravin]

If he is Mormon (why are you not sure that he is?), then he also knows that it is wrong.

Well, if someone who told me they were LDS but were pushing for premarital sex, that'd make me doubt. Though I do have the benefit of a solid understanding of the Law of Chastity (along with other understandings that could turn into shibboleths).

Edited July 24, 2012 by Dravin

[Wingnut]

Well, if someone who told me they were LDS but were pushing for premarital sex, that'd make me doubt. Though I do have the benefit of a solid understanding of the Law of Chastity (along with other understandings that could turn into shibboleths).

Nice reference!

[genuine]

Because I've met a guy, claiming to be mormon. ( I found my faith before I met him) And he is pushing me, he wants to take the next step. And I really like him but, I don't want to do it. So, I just wanted to know cos, I don't feel like it should be the right thing to do.

Be true to yourself and don't give in. Its definitely not the right thing to do.

[Onhech]

If you are looking for accuracy you are not going to get it. You are asking (mainly) religious people un-anonymously in a public forum if they broke the most preached against commandment in the Bible. Those who did will most likely A) not answer or B) not tell the truth. However, I will not - I am single. :)

[ZionsRodeVos]

For how long did You date your husband/wife before you got married? And did you have sex before you got married?

I dated my children's mom for a few months, went back to the states, and married her a few weeks after she was allowed to come to the US. I did not have sex before I got married.

You should tell the guy no and he should respect you and not push you any more.

[NeuroTypical]

For how long did You date your husband/wife before you got married? And did you have sex before you got married?

1 year, no.

[pam]

And did you have sex before you got married?

Isn't that a bit of personal information you are asking of site members that is clearly none of your business?

[HiJolly]

6 months, no, and no petting, either.

HiJolly

[Guest]

Long enough to know it was right, and short enough to make the answer to the other question "no".

If he had pushed me to break my covenants, I wouldn't have continued dating him, let alone considered marrying him.

[mrmarklin]

Dated exactly one year and married about 2-1/2 months after that in the temple.

I don't think the question is out of line at all. No one really needs to answer the second one.

I'm not a big believer in a short dating time because I think that there is a lot of information to be gained by knowing the person during a year long "life-cycle". I even believed it at the yourng age of 21 when I left the mission field.

It sounds like I was over smart for my age, but the fly in the ointment was that I was a student and so was my wife. Because of that artificial environment, my decision was not as wise as it should have been. I didn't really see that life cycle. That being said, we've ironed our problems out and have been married for over 40 years.

[bluedreams]

Well, I'm not married. But i've been interested in a guy for about a year now, known him for 6. For some personal issues on his part we're not dating though it very much seems like it some days. We've not had sex and we're not going to (we have kissed and are physically affectionate). That may seem presumptuous, but that's on my list of non-negotiable standards, insomuch that I have personal rules of physical contact to make sure we don't get even close. Don't let someone pressure you into anything. If he truly respects you, he wouldn't pressure you to do so. I feel that's something that's absolutely necessary that there be mutual respect for each other and our covenants.

With luv,

BD

Edited July 25, 2012 by bluedreams

[Jennarator]

My first husband we were friends two years then dated one. No sex before marriage.

Second one dated almost a week, got engaged, married about 3 month after we got engaged. No sex before marriage. But I knoew this guy since I was 14.....well kinda when I was 14. Then we never talked until 20 years later when we re-met on FB.

I don't think its a matter of time, I think it's just knowing you can connect with this person.

And I am glad we got married fast or the answer to the second question might have been different. (Since we had both been married it would have been hared to wait.)