Question about returning to Church

[StrangeRoads]

Hello everyone.

A few years ago I officially resigned from the church and had my name removed.

I now realize that was a mistake and I want to return. I live in a completely different state now, so I do not know any church members in this area.

When I was a member, I was an active, Temple attending, full tithe payer, and I served in the Elder's Quorum presidency.

Sorry, I'm rambling.

Anyway, in all my years in the church, I'd never met a person who "quit" and then came back.

How are such people treated? Are they welcomed fully, or are they always doubted and not completely trusted?

And how do I go about this? I'm quite nervous about it.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance.

[estradling75]

You return like any less active/investigator does. You show up to church on Sunday... You read the scriptures and pray. At some point you will need to talk to the bishop and explain your history so he knows and can guide you, that is his role.

You should expect to be treated like any less active/investigator which means more assignments and responsibility as you are judged to be ready for them based on your progression in coming back (again bishop's role)

Clearly we can't tell you how welcoming your local ward and bishop are going to be but they should be very happy to help you go as far as you are willing

[Misshalfway]

Hi Strangeroads. Nice to meet you.

I think your fears are very understandable. Sometimes people can be judgy or rejecting if you don't follow the mormon program. But if that does happen, remember it's not about YOU! It's a reflection of the person who is doing the judging.

Having said that though, I think you'll find most people are welcoming, unassuming, and generous with their acceptance and attention. And I know you aren't alone in having returned to the church from a long absence. There are many. I am one of those. And I hope your return is as rejoiced amongst the congregation as it should be.

I'd like to emphasize that you don't owe anybody an explanation for your life choices or the journey of your life. Yes, the bishop needs to be involved. But that is a private and sacred interchange that only need involve the two of you and the Lord. Other leaders may be made aware of your circumstances if it becomes appropriate, but even then you don't owe them an explanation. You are where you are now. And that's that. And it's nobody's business how or why you went away or how or why you are back for that matter. So...just rest in where you are now and where you are going. And who cares what other people think about it. They don't know.....they can't know....what you've been through. The more you love and accept yourself, they more the reactions of others won't bear sway in your fears.

Many blessings to you! And welcome home!

[mikbone]

show up.

[Sharky]

If your name ws actually "removed" from the records of the church, you will likely need to be rebaptised at some point. That is something your Bishop &/or Stake Prez can help you determine based on membership records. If they have to contact Salt Lake for the membership status, it might take some time, so be patient/

Returning to church & attending meeting is a first step towards being rebaptised if that is necessary.

Chances are the ward missionaries or the full-time missionaries will want to start meeting with you, help you, challenge you, like any other "non-member". Again, that is part of the process.

As far as returning & acceptance.

Every ward, every person, is different. There will be some members of the ward who will be meeting you for the 1st time, others may already know you.

Few, if any, will know why you left or the specifics of your situation & they need not know unless you want them too.

In general, there will be a few that wonder about your abscence from the church, there may be a few that will judge, most though will accept you as you are today & befriend that person forgetting anything that is in the past.

From a personal side, I firmly believe taht you will find returning to be much easier if you have a friend or two there at church. People who will look for you each week, call you on Saturday afternoons just to visit & maybe ask if they will be seeing at church, people who will help you along they way & that you can rely on too.

[Blackmarch]

I agree with whats been said. while individuals reactions will be different, I think you'll find on the whole that most will be happy and pleased that you're returning.

[livy111us]

How are such people treated? Are they welcomed fully, or are they always doubted and not completely trusted?

With open arms. Personally, I have a lot respect for someone who does just that. It is a very difficult task and takes a lot of courage to make the trek back, but you will feel nothing but love from the Savior and those around you to encourage and lift you up on your journey home.

[NightSG]

And how do I go about this?

Try the front door.

I mean, come on; you're talking about walking into a crowd of Mormons worrying that nobody will talk to you. That's like a pork chop worrying that it will be ignored in a wolf den.

[JosephP]

I was excommunicated from the church for over 25 years. When I came to my senses and returned the welcome was sincere and warm. I have never felt judged or looked down on by anyone. Like you I was worried about what returning would be like. It turned out to be a head game I was playing by myself. Whatever is keeping you from walking back trough that door, you can remove concerns about being welcome from your list, I promise you.

[pam]

Wonderful post Joseph. :)

[Mute]

Why do you have to tell anyone you had your name removed? Just don't bring it up. The only one that would actually have to know is your bishop. You could even ask him not to announce your baptism in sacrament. That way you only have to share that you were a former member to those you feel will not judge you. I don't know how many would actually judge you but if they did then you wouldn't want to associate with them anyways. Just hang around the nice members and after you get to know them well enough, then you can share that you were a former member for awhile if you like. I just wouldn't go around wearing a sign on my head saying "FORMER MEMBER REJOINING". That's just my opinion.

Personally, I don't tell but a handful of people in person that I'm not lds. Even my own roommate doesn't know I'm not lds. Those that do know I'm not lds certainly do not know that I had ever been lds. Only one or two people in person have I ever told that and only after having known them for well over a year. There just isn't a reason to go put a label on yourself. I hope that helps and good luck with your rejoining!

[NightSG]

I just wouldn't go around wearing a sign on my head saying "FORMER MEMBER REJOINING".

What about on your belt? ThinkGeek :: Scrolling LED Belt Buckle II

[szorgalmasan]

I don't think you would have any problems. The last branch I attended had a guy get re-baptized 8 years after excommunication. We were all just happy to have someone else to share the calling load. No one judged him negatively.

[NeuroTypical]

Anyway, in all my years in the church, I'd never met a person who "quit" and then came back.

How are such people treated? Are they welcomed fully, or are they always doubted and not completely trusted?

If you come to my ward, you're welcome to sit with us. I'd love to hear your story, if it's something you'd like to share.

I 'quit' for 6 years, but never actually requested name removal or anything like that. When I came back, I told the various bishops involved a little about my situation. They expressed offers to help if there was any sin or misdeeds I needed to confess, but otherwise didn't really press for details at all. They were happy to see me, and willing to work with me in the ways I desired to be worked with.

Welcome!

[fuse]

Are you sure it's not just because you're in a new situation, and you're scared? The indoctrination and brainwashing can run deep, I would sincerely pray about it with an open mind (not trying to validate a decision) and see how you really feel.

[Guest]

Are you sure it's not just because you're in a new situation, and you're scared? The indoctrination and brainwashing can run deep, I would sincerely pray about it with an open mind (not trying to validate a decision) and see how you really feel.

Could you please explain what you mean by "indoctrination and brainwashing"?

[idahommie]

Wow.......

[IRealtor007]

Well for me I had my name removed and like you realise it was a horriable mistake... I"m treated really well. I was re baptized in august of 2012.. The members have been great and really supportive of my decision to come back.. I've even volunteered to give my first talk and I never gave a talk before.. I really enjoyed that... Also got a new calling.. My first one so i'm excited for that...

I would say do it you will find peace and joy in you're life again