Not on issue, just a question for the gents

[Backroads]

If your wife were pregnant, and casually mentioned one morning she had a crazy dream where another man was the father of her child and she had been trying to find a way to hide it from you, would this make you panic?

[Vort]

No.

[Backroads]

No.

So, why am I getting "You cheated on me in a dream!"

[Guest]

Backroads... I asked my husband. He said, "I'm used to it - people look at my Filipino kids and just assume I'm not the father". LOL!

[Vort]

So, why am I getting "You cheated on me in a dream!"

Hmmm. Maybe because you didn't tell him, "Look, with that attitude I'll probably torture and dismember you in a dream."

Seriously, though, if I ever had a dream that involved my infidelity to my wife, you can bet I would never, ever, ever tell her (or probably anyone else) about it. Some things are better left unsaid.

[Vort]

Backroads... I asked my husband. He said, "I'm used to it - people look at my Filipino kids and just assume I'm not the father". LOL!

I have some sympathy for your husband. Sister Vort and I are both Caucasian. Two of our sons have eyes with epicanthic folds. On at least one occasion, the older of these sons was asked if he was adopted or if is father was Asian.

[Guest]

Pregnancy = crazy dreams.

[skippy740]

[slamjet]

I would then say "then I hope the child looks more like you."

[Wingnut]

Before we got married, my husband and I agreed that anything that happens in dreams is off-limits with regard to getting mad at each other. For the most part, it's impossible to control one's dreams. I have had an occasional dream where I was with another man. It's left me unsettled enough that I've had to talk about it, so I've told my husband. He usually laughs it off with some comment to the effect of, "well, I hope he was hot!"

[Dravin]

Before we got married, my husband and I agreed that anything that happens in dreams is off-limits with regard to getting mad at each other. For the most part, it's impossible to control one's dreams. I have had an occasional dream where I was with another man. It's left me unsettled enough that I've had to talk about it, so I've told my husband. He usually laughs it off with some comment to the effect of, "well, I hope he was hot!"

I panic over my crazy dreams not Beefche's. It's that brief moment between dreaming and being fully awake when you can't distinguish reality from the dream that causes the panic. Nothing like waking up to 5 seconds of soul crushing guilt until your brain kicks in and explains, "No, you did not cheat on your wife."

[Windseeker]

I saw this and I was like Hey!..I'm a gent

anywho..

No it wouldn't bother me. I dreamed my first child came out as a werewolf and I'm not a werewolf, but I wasn't suspicious of my wife or anything.

[Vort]

I panic over my crazy dreams not Beefche's. It's that brief moment between dreaming and being fully awake when you can't distinguish reality from the dream that causes the panic. Nothing like waking up to 5 seconds of soul crushing guilt until your brain kicks in and explains, "No, you did not cheat on your wife."

Or in your dream, when you think, "How could I have committed adultery? How could I have cheated on my wife? I will never get past this!"

Hypothetically speaking, I mean. Supposing someone actually had a dream like that, which of course I never would.

[NeuroTypical]

If your wife were pregnant, and casually mentioned one morning she had a crazy dream where another man was the father of her child and she had been trying to find a way to hide it from you, would this make you panic?

Oh heck no. That would be a rather mild dream compared to some of the more bizarre or extreme or horrible dreams both of us have had. And we've each had plenty.

It's important to know what dreams are, and what they are not.

[classylady]

Pregnancy = crazy dreams.

Definitely. I had doozies when I was pregnant. I usually don't have nightmares, but I would have disturbing dreams while pregnant. It's funny I can't remember any of them right now. I just know I had them.

My girlfriend once dreamed that she could take her pregnancy off like an apron. She dreamed she wanted to go snow skiing, so she just untied her belly and set it aside while she went skiing.

[Wingnut]

My girlfriend once dreamed that she could take her pregnancy off like an apron. She dreamed she wanted to go snow skiing, so she just untied her belly and set it aside while she went skiing.

Man, that would be nice! Especially for things like...sleeping.

[Dravin]

Or in your dream, when you think, "How could I have committed adultery? How could I have cheated on my wife? I will never get past this!"

Hypothetically speaking, I mean. Supposing someone actually had a dream like that, which of course I never would.

I've had dreams where I'm drinking alcohol like it isn't anything but there is some small part of me in the dream shouting to myself, "What do you think you're doing! Idiot!"

Edited November 21, 2012 by Dravin

[Guest SquidMom]

My husband once dreamed that he was on a surgery table and a dog and a cat were neutering him... (We both worked at a vet office.) Dreams often don't mean anything.

[john doe]

Or in your dream, when you think, "How could I have committed adultery? How could I have cheated on my wife? I will never get past this!"

Hypothetically speaking, I mean. Supposing someone actually had a dream like that, which of course I never would.

Just for the record. we will not be starting a new forum category dedicated to giving advice to people who dreamt they slept around. You folks will just have to deal with it on your own in your own ways.

[seeking_peace]

My ex-husband had once had a dream that he walked in on me and another man in bed. For days afterward he looked at me with suspicion. I had to keep reminding him that it was HIS subconscious, and not mine, that had me in bed with someone else.

[FunkyTown]

If my wife told me that, I'd get a chuckle out of it. I don't think dreams are really meaningful to me.

However, when my wife has a dream where I'm a jerk to her, I apologize. I hug her and say I'm sorry I was a jerk in her dream.

She's sleepy at this point when she tells me, so it usually makes her feel better and she laughs about it in the morning. Or it has, up to this point. There've only been a couple.

[Wingnut]

My husband once dreamed that he was on a surgery table and a dog and a cat were neutering him... (We both worked at a vet office.) Dreams often don't mean anything.

Payback's a female dog.

However, when my wife has a dream where I'm a jerk to her, I apologize. I hug her and say I'm sorry I was a jerk in her dream.

My husband does this, too. I appreciate the gesture, but at the same time I feel bad that he's apologizing, because he didn't actually do anything wrong.

[annewandering]

Lately I have had a horrible dream that scared me bad. I had done an unforgivable thing in the dream that I cant even talk about. When I woke up I had to convince myself it wasnt a hidden memory it was that overwhelming. There have been three dreams like this in my life that have had lasting effects on me. They are not easy to let go of.

Even though they did not involve adultery I just wouldnt tell my husband. Not really sure why but they are hard enough for me to put out of my mind without adding them to my husbands.

[john doe]

Lately I have had a horrible dream that scared me bad. I had done an unforgivable thing in the dream that I cant even talk about. When I woke up I had to convince myself it wasnt a hidden memory it was that overwhelming. There have been three dreams like this in my life that have had lasting effects on me. They are not easy to let go of.

Even though they did not involve adultery I just wouldnt tell my husband. Not really sure why but they are hard enough for me to put out of my mind without adding them to my husbands.

Don't tell me you dreamt you voted for a Republican? Oh, the horror!

[mirkwood]

Let's hope dreams don't mean anyting.

Mirky dreams = Blackhawk Down meets Saving Private Ryan Normandy scene meets Band of Brothers Carenten scene meets Aliens meets Predator meets The Walking Dead meets Dracula meets Independence Day meets werewolves and witchcraft, with some traffic stop & domestic violence call shootous mixed into the picture.