Vort

I'M IN THE MONEY!!!

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Happened to glance at my spam before deleting it, and boy, am I glad I did! I'm in the money, folks! CA$H DOLLAR$!! And i can tell this isn't your typical Nigerian spam scheme, because it's not from Nigeria! It's from some perfectly legit-sounding outfit called Astound.net (paint me astounded!) based, apparently, in Italy. Mamma mia! Can anything bad come out of Italy?

I thought I'd share the news of my good fortune with you, so you can all feel appropriately jealous of me. You're welcome.

*******************************

For Mutual Benefit

 
 

Larry Paulson <[email protected]>

Sep 17, 2020, 1:27 PM (20 hours ago)
 
 
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Hello,


I am Larry Peter Paulson Director Inspection Unit United Nations Inspection Agent in Hartsfield?Jackson Atlanta International Airport Atlanta GA. We are rounding up for the last Quater of the auditing, all abandom Consignment in US Airports are being transfer to our facilities here for inspection and confiscation. During our investigation, I discovered An abandoned shipment on your name which was transferred to our facility here in Hartsfield?Jackson Atlanta International Airport and when scanned it revealed an undisclosed sum of money in a Metal Trunk Box. The consignment was abandoned because the Content was not properly declared by the consignee as money, rather it was declared as personal effect to avoid diversion by the Diplomatic Agent also the Diplomat inability to pay for Non Inspection Fees.

On my assumption, the boxes will contain more that $6M and the consignment is still left in storage facility till today. The Consignment is a metal box with weight of about 242LBS (Internal dimension: W61 x H156 x D73 (cm). Effective capacity: 680 L.)Approximately. The details of the consignment including your name the official document from United Nation office in London are tagged on the Metal Trunk box.

I want to use my good office and clear the Consignment and deliver it to you. If you WILL ACCEPT MY     C  O  N  D  I  T  I  O  N     AND want us to transact the delivery for mutual benefit, you should provide your name, Phone Number and full address, to cross check if it corresponds with the address on the official document including the name of nearest Airport around you and other details. You should send the required details to me for onward delivery.

All communication must be held extremely confidential. I can get everything concluded within 24 to 48 hours upon your    acceptance    and proceed to your address for delivery. But it must be on the condition that you will give me 30% of the amount contained in the boxes and i must get assurance from you concerning my 30% before i will proceed.

I want us to transact this business and share the money, since the shipper have abandoned it and ran away. I will pay for the Non inspection fee and arrange for the boxes to be moved out of this Airport to your address, Once i am through, i will deploy the services of a secured shipping Company to provide the security it needs to your doorstep. or i can bring it by myself to avoid any more trouble. But i will share it 70% to you and 30% to me. But you have to assure me of my 30%. do respond to me immediately if you are interested to conclude this with me.

Looking forward to hear from you

Best Regards,
Larry Peter Paulson
INSPECTION OFFICE
Edited by Vort

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I was doing a quick email clean-up (low on space) while talking with my 14-year-old, and with him standing there and me not thinking about it too much, I decided to glance through the junk mail before deleting it to see if there was anything funny. On reflection, that was a very bad idea that could have ended poorly. But I did get Mr. Paulson's kind and generous offer, so as the Bible says, all's well that ends well.

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21 hours ago, Vort said:

On my assumption, the boxes will contain more that $6M and the consignment is still left in storage facility till today.

$6Million!!!!!??? Count me in!!!!

21 hours ago, Vort said:

But it must be on the condition that you will give me 30% of the amount contained in the boxes and i must get assurance from you concerning my 30% before i will proceed.

Oh. Only $4.2 million. Well nevermind then.

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On 9/19/2020 at 4:37 AM, Vort said:

so as the Bible says, all's well that ends well.

Vort, I'm sure you know this but others may not - this saying is generally attributed to Shakespeare, it being the name of one of his plays.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All's_Well_That_Ends_Well

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On 9/19/2020 at 3:08 AM, Vort said:

Happened to glance at my spam before deleting it, and boy, am I glad I did! I'm in the money, folks! CA$H DOLLAR$!! And i can tell this isn't your typical Nigerian spam scheme, because it's not from Nigeria! It's from some perfectly legit-sounding outfit called Astound.net (paint me astounded!) based, apparently, in Italy. Mamma mia! Can anything bad come out of Italy?

I thought I'd share the news of my good fortune with you, so you can all feel appropriately jealous of me. You're welcome.

My dearest @Vort

You've just become my deepest, dearest, most treasured friend. Have I ever told you how much I admire and respect you? And friends look out for each other and help each other, yes? And may I remind you of Jacob 2:6 and Matthew 5:42

17  Think of your brethren like unto yourselves, and be familiar with all and free with your substance, that they may be rich like unto you.

42  Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away.

I'll send you my address and account details via personal message. 

 

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One crazy thought that I learned recently is if you make more than $32,350 in United States currency per year you are among the top one percent of global earners.  If you are among the top one percent of global earners and pay your tithing imagine what these tithes and offerings can do for saints in foreign countries.

Edited by Still_Small_Voice

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34 minutes ago, Still_Small_Voice said:

One crazy thought that I learned recently is if you make more than $32,350 in United States currency per year you are among the top one percent of global earners.  If you are among the top one percent of global earners and pay your tithing imagine what these tithes and offerings can do for saints in foreign countries.

This gives me motivation to connect with the spam artist that contacts my work's email.  Multiple times a day, he tells me about how the financial robot can solve my financial woes.

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4 hours ago, askandanswer said:

Vort, I'm sure you know this but others may not - this saying is generally attributed to Shakespeare, it being the name of one of his plays.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All's_Well_That_Ends_Well

 

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I wonder what would happen if they sent that to someone in Georgia.  A proper response could be...let me just drive on down to the Airport and see if anything you are saying has any validity...

And then come back with a message to them saying that it was...but they weren't listed and if they want to be included in the claim they need to send you a mailing address, phone number, id number, and around 10K so that you can get the "key" to the storage locker at the airport...

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