Tasteless and offensive joke that no decent human being would ever laugh at

[Vort]

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs who just lies on the grass in the front yard?

Lon

[NeuroTypical]

What do you call a lady with one leg shorter than the other?  Eileen.

[Vort]

30 minutes ago, NeuroTypical said:

What do you call a lady with one leg shorter than the other?  Eileen.

Ah, yes. I know her husband, Ben.

[Jamie123]

What do you call a man with a jack on his head...oh drat!

[Jamie123]

On 4/5/2024 at 7:22 PM, NeuroTypical said:

What do you call a lady with one leg shorter than the other?  Eileen.

What do you call a woman who throws all her bills onto the fire?

Bernadette

[rcthompson88]

What do you call a woman with a peg leg? Illene

[rcthompson88]

1 hour ago, rcthompson88 said:

What do you call a woman with a peg leg? Illene

I would also accept Peggy

[pam]

What do you call a man with no shins? - Tony

[pam]

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? - Bob

[NeuroTypical]

Why did @Vort go fishing?

Just for the halibut.

[Jamie123]

What did one earwig say to the other earwig when they both fell of the wall for the tenth time that day?

Earwig go again!

[Jamie123]

Why can you never find any aspirins in the jungle?

Because parrots eat 'em all.

[Jamie123]

This one always cracks me up...

What do you call a boy with a paper bag over his head?

Russell.

[Jamie123]

On 4/5/2024 at 8:19 PM, Jamie123 said:

What do you call a man with a jack on his head...oh drat!

In the same noble tradition:

Why didn't worms go into the ark in pears...I mean apples? Oh drat!

[Traveler]

What can you do with an elephant on the freeway?

   Almost 21 miles an hour.

How do you know if you just passed an elephant?

  The toilet won’t flush.

 

The Traveler

[Jamie123]

How do you fit four elephants in a Mini?

Two in the front, two in the back.

How do you know if an elephant's been in your fridge?

Footprints in the butter.

How do you know if two elephants have been in your fridge?

Two sets of footprints in the butter.

How do you know if three elephants have been in your fridge?

Three sets of footprints in the butter.

How do you know if four elephants have been in your fridge?

There's a Mini parked outside.

Edited April 16, 2024 by Jamie123

[Vort]

As a child, I totally missed the self-referential brilliance of Elephant Jokes. As an adult, I have repented.

Edited April 16, 2024 by Vort

[mirkwood]

 

[LDSGator]

43 minutes ago, mirkwood said:

 

LMBO!!!! 
 

priceless. 

[LDSGator]

We were listening to Destroyer on the way to Gainesville today!  

 

Edited April 17, 2024 by LDSGator

[NeuroTypical]

Not tasteless, not offensive, not even a joke, but I wanted to share:

"Yesterday, someone was so wrong on the internet, that I caught a 5 day posting ban!"
- NT, to his wife this morning