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I have had three miscarriages. Two in the first trimester and one at 20 weeks. The one that I couldn't stop thinking about was the 20 week. I felt the baby's spirit leave and that's when I think his heart stopped. We say the baby. A little boy. Because I had a hard time I made this baby a subject of a lot of prayer and fasting. It took several months to get an answer. The answer was that someday I would be able to raise that child. That was a comfort. I know if you will fast and pray with sincerity for an answer you will be comforted. You might get answers that are meant for you. Because we all have our agency (including the spirits of these babies) the answer will vary from mother to mother and child to child. I wish you all the best.

That was exactly what I was thinking. I love online communities and support groups though

It was the first thing I put on my smart phone. :)

Then how do you explain John the Baptist?

My first two kids were in cloth diapers. Not because I chose but because that was what was available and affordable. Disposables weren't as good as they are today and they were expensive. When we got my grandson, disposables were it. What I didn't like about cloth were the rashes, the diaper pail, plastic pants, sigh... P.S. My dad read an article a few months back which said a couple of BYU students had found a bacteria(?) that would decompose plastics. So . . . this is good news for all those who feel guilty about the diapers in the landfills.

Its impossible to spoil a newborn! (I think I posted that under the person on Facebook too). :)

Our RS did this once. They called it "Sit and Chat Finish That" It was a nice evening. There were only about 5 or 6 sisters. It hasn't been done since. It would be nice to do it again. Carlimac, In the past when I have felt the way you describe I've reacted badly and not so badly. The bad was to hibernate. Not good results. I found over the years that when I am obedient I can change my attitude and then I don't feel like its such a problem to give service, attend meetings or fulfill callings. I believe its Satan that uses our natural weaknesses against us. He magnifies our feelings of inadequacy, shyness, etc. so that we start doubting ourselves. Its also easy to start holding someone else's progress as a ruler for our progress. As hard as it is not to, we shouldn't measure our inner feelings against someone else's publically expressed feelings. Well . . . . we should compare in any way. :) All it does it reinforce the feelings on inadequacy.

This scripture came to mind when I read your post. Doctrine and Covenants 122:7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.

I don't think so. There are many reasons people might not send cards. The only way to know if they would rather not get one is to ask and of course that's uncomfortable. But I doubt many people don't appreciate a Christmas Card.

Will the third time be the charm? I've typed this out twice and lost it. I don't think the issues are strictly an adult child problem or a parent problem. I know too many families who have adult children living at home (with and without their own children). And I hear of so very many more. I also think its more complicated than the economy, or the job market, or school. This isn't a new thing in our society either. Multi-generational homes were just the way it was done (except the children seemed more responsible in my parents and grandparents generations.). Sometimes families find themselves in this situation because of an adult child's choices and sometimes a crisis happens that is oui of everyone's control. My two youngest children: My 28-yo son moved home 4 years ago when he got custody of his son. We made the decision to let him move home knowing we would be supporting them financially and in other ways. I'm a grandma-Mom and when I use that term its instantly understood (which says a lot about our society today.). After four years our son is finally becoming more responsible and is contributing to the household finances. Helping with the cleaning is a different story. I do not clean his room or do his laundry! My daughter (and her husband) moved in a year ago, for financial reasons. They have surprised me. We were very clear about the expectations and thought everyone was on the same page. Trying to get help with the cleaning and cooking is difficult. Financially they are struggling and are not contributing to the household finances. Big Sigh! My daughter reverted to age 15 when they moved home. They do not have children ... yet. I don't know many parents who would turn away a child in need. We do our best to make the rules and set the example and do all we can to help our children be independent. Sometimes that means re-parenting. What we can't do is take away their agency. So we let them move home because there is a need and then it crumbles from there. Five years ago I would have been the one saying the problem is parents enabling their children. Today I all I can say is "its more complicated than that. And, I don't have the solution. But I do know that it was the right thing for us to do. I don't know when it will end. It is very frustrating most of the time, especially on weekends when my husband is home and gets upset because our children aren't helping more. We do not pay for cell phones, we do not pay for cars or gas, we do not pay for movies, etc. We provide a roof, food, laundry room but not services and since I already have WiFi they have internet access on all their devices. Its getting more difficult as the price of everything keeps going up. My husband wants to turn the router off on weekends. He forgets our phone service is though the internet and so is his TV. I know families like ours who are struggling and find it difficult, and I know a couple of families who seem to make it work out better. I'm not sure there will be a solution to this growing problem in our society in the near future. There are too many contributing factors.

I agree that we don't become mortal until the resurrection. But is dead mortal? I've never thought of that.

How would God warn you of something that is "not of Him"? Maybe with darkness? As I've read this thread "stupor of thought" comes to mind. Doctrine and Covenants 9:9 "But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you cannot write that which is sacred save it be given you from me."

Pam, I agree. And it shouldn't be that way. Our neighbors daughter just came home early and before she got here her mother said "We're going to have to move now." That made me sad. Our ward is great for welcoming non/new/inactive members. But when it comes to a missionary coming home early they sort of lose that welcoming attitude. I don't know if its because they don't know what to say or if it situational, but its still there. I also think sometimes its the missionary and their family who feel judged when there isn't any judgement but rather concern.

Isn't depending on studies making it easier to not rely on the Spirit? The arm of flesh thing. :)

We have the gospel library app on several smart phones...Android and Windows. Its great! I would love a Kindle Fire HD some day. By the time I can get one there will be something new.

I'm looking forward to reading this. My son returned early and it did change his life. How our Stake and Ward handled it had a profound effect too.

I am trying to be surprised and shocked by this behavior. But why should a homosexual teen act any differently than the homosexual adults. I'm am continually baffled by the attitude of "if I don't get the answer I want then I'm being bullied, discriminated, etc." We even see it here in some of the threads. Someone asks a question and doesn't like the answers therefore the people trying to answer the question are flaming. Until we teach our children to not be easily offended by others' opinions this trend is just going to get worse. But... its probably going to continue to get worse because this is what is being overwhelmingly in the media and other places in our world.

This has confused me too. If you need help with education, job help, etc. contact the employment specialist in your ward. Or if there is an employment center close just drop in. Help with temporal affairs is available in its proper place. Sunday is not the proper place. RS meetings are where we learn to grow spiritually. Again... Please don't take this as criticism of you personally, because it applies to everyone. We all see what we expect to see. We hear what we expect to hear. If we don't open our spiritual ears we won't hear what Heavenly Father wants us to hear. Our family ward is a mix of affluent and less affluent (although the percentages of each are changing). We have professional women and students and mothers. No one is "infantisized" ever! Don't judge before you attend. If you go looking for a certain behavior you'll find it, so be careful what you look for.

I don't agree. Pres. Hinckley talked frequently about higher education for women. My sister didn't marry until after she was 30 and children after 31. She has four boys and the oldest is leaving on a mission this month. Don't count yourself out yet. If you need some encouragement from a single LDS woman then read Sheri Dew's books and talks. I would say 99% of what we're taught is about being a good woman. Which applies to what you want it to. If you're only looking for what applies to mother/wife/homemaker that's what you'll find but if you broaden your perspective you will soon realize it all applies to single/working/childless too.

I'm from the ice ages when 50 cents an hour for babysitting was a lot of money. And that was for 2+ kids with no upper limit. Oh... and I was expected to leave the house cleaner than I found it. Now... I'm a grandma, raising a 5-1/2 yo. In the 4+ years we've had him I think we've payed a babysitter 5-6 times. I can't afford it. Either we can afford the movie or the babysitting but not both. We've usually only call a babysitter when we've gone to the temple and our son (daddy) can't make it home from work before we have to leave the house. I've paid $5.00 an hour and that seems high to me. Because we're not a family who calls a babysitter on a regular basis we have a hard time finding someone when we do need them. When I was growing up and when my kids were young it seemed that babysitting was as much about providing a service as it was about being paid. I think its great that young teens can make a few bucks by babysitting but I am also noticing an expectation and a less helpful mindset among young teens today. Service? That's something you have to do when you YW/YM's leaders schedule work instead of play for the midweek activity.

Pick any organization in the world. If you look for corruption you'll find it. Human beings are flawed. If i were in your shoes I would hold on to what I know to be true. Such as: Heavenly Father lives and loves us, Jesus is the Christ and He died for my sins, Joseph Smith is the prophet of the last dispensation, the Book of Mormon is the word of God, It is scripture. Then I would fast and pray. If you truly need a confirmation of the basics of our faith you'll get one. If you dwell on the bad things or people who make mistakes then all that will happen is you will end up not believing at all. If that's where you want to go that's up to you. Satan uses our doubts and if we let those doubts grow eventually he wins. Every member has trials in life that test their faith. This is probably one of those times for you. btw, I don't thing Wingnut is flaming you. She has a valid question "What do you expect to learn from us here?" If you've already made up your mind and are just venting then nothing anyone says will help you or the people responding. If you answer the question and other questions you might find helpful answers.

I am comfortable with the words used by the Kidds. And I agree with LM's and Anddenex's comments. We don't sit down and have conversations with deceased relatives. Far from it. Because of the sacred nature of spiritual experiences in the temple and surround family history work, rarely are the experiences discussed openly. We lose the sacredness when we talk about something so often it becomes common.

You need to read Rough Stone Rolling. If you search here there are other threads discussing polygamy and Joseph Smith in detail. One thing to consider is that back in the early 1800s it was common for young people to marry in their early teens and not just girls. We get ourselves in trouble when we judge behavior from the 1800s by today's expectations. Nothing anyone says here will be as clear and fair as Richard Bushman's book.

There is a difference between calling someone as an assignment from the church and calling or visiting a neighbor who you'd like to get to know. I agree... if they have requested no contact from the church then respect that, meaning don't show up and say "I'm your home teacher" or "I'm the ward missionary." But there is nothing wrong with befriending someone. If you're sincere in your motives (Christ-like love) then even if it takes a long time to trust your motives eventually they won't be offended. That's what missionary work on a ward level is all about. Sincerely applying the love of Christ to our relationships with those who are inactive will always change hearts.

Thank you. I was going to say that it sounded more like ward missionary than fellowship coordinator. Fellowshipping inactives just means you become their friend. I would think that as a coordinator you would maybe pair up an inactive with someone who might have the same interests/concerns and maybe a friendship would develop from there. The key here is that any friendship attempts need to be sincere and often it takes a long, long time to develop a relationship with someone who is holding the church at arms length. But with persistence and time its through sincere friendship that hearts are touched and people are changed.