ryanh

:confused:

You are asking about specific guidance, but mixing in moral considerations ("tacky"). You ought to consider the two issues completely separately. Whether or not there is any law is something that you would have to ask an attorney that is familiar with your state's specific laws. I doubt there are many states whose laws or administrative rules are so specific as to address individual assets such as rings. Generally, the laws indicate "equitable distribution of assets", but there is some latitude for the parties to negotiate as monetary worth is not the only value that may be placed on items. Do you know whether or not you live in a community property state? That may impact the legal rights of both parties to any assets acquired before or after marriage.

My map search does indicate it is right by St Marks.

I am amused by the constructs of our own minds and how that influences our preferences, ideals, and desires. This is so apparent to me as I am in the antithetical position to you rxmarccall. Having been married, and now divorced, I'm extremely reluctant to even consider anyone that is a virgin. Given my experiences, were I in your shoes, I might be glad to understand 1) she is not completely frigid, 2) she is a HONEST person that communicates in reality, 3) is now worthy, and 4) has done more learning and growing than many her age. In failure there is much learning. In success, not so much. With that background, I would add my voice that this is about YOU, not her. You need to figure yourself out, if you are being judgmental in a way you wouldn't want to be judged, and if this is something you can get past. Seek guidance on your knees, and ask for help to forgive, forget, and move on. Echoing mirancs8, there will be greater issues you two will face in marriage. And it will take similar efforts to forgive and move past. This is a good test for you two to see if you have what it takes. If this remains a sticking point for you two after working on it, it probably isn't a good idea to get married IMO.

Yes, I too have had the UPPP. Not a fun surgery to recover from, but it has helped quite a bit! I know a lot of docs are reluctant to consider it, and there are studies showing limited success. But, if OSA is the problem, esp with tongue or back of throat, I say go for it! Even with that surgery, I still have problems if I lay on my back. Just not a bad of problems as before. And, the combo of the UPPP, sinus surgeries, and the shirt/ball seem to have really helped. The shirt/ball is simple and inexpensive. It's well worth the try. It's been a great help to me.

Pam, I was hoping to talk to you this Fri about this. I know the OP was pretty old, and I knew you had apnea, but didn't know if you felt the two were connected. It took me a while to figure out that my insomnia was related to sleep apnea. It seems completely counter intuitive, but something about the apnea causes the mind to not want to go back to sleep. At least for me. One would think that being so sleep deprived would overrule insomnia, but apparently not. My body hasn't respond to CPAP. It just doesn't relieve the symptoms. I've had several surgeries, and they have helped. But, what I am doing now seems to have the greatest benefit. I have found a way to keep myself from lying on my back - the position where the majority of my apneas occur. What I did is take a one-size-too-small t-shirt (so it's snug and won't twist around my torso) and sewed a pocket in the upper middle of the back, right between the shoulder blades. In that pocket I place a hard plastic ball. So, anytime I roll onto my back while sleeping, I have a built in reminder to keep rolling till I'm on my side. After a couple nights, I no longer noticed it at all. It became pretty automatic that I simply rolled over to the other side without waking up because of the ball. I used to wake up periodically from an apnea, and find myself on my back. Now, I don't wake up from apnea's at all, and I never find myself on my back. Here are couple photos of one of the shirts I made. (I pleated the pocket so that it fit the ball well, but didn't press it into my back)

Although I have not read it myself, it was mentioned in passing at a meeting last night while discussing guidance in the Church Handbook of Instructions that the official position of the church is to discourage cremation except in circumstances required by country laws. It's not prohibited - it is the person's choice. But burial is preferable when available.

As I'm sure your research told you, the factors you pointed out are the tests the IRS would apply in determining contractor vs employee classification. It does sound like a potential issue to me. One thought - if the job isn't worth the money, it might not be worth the hassle of getting into a fight either. Even if you file for determination at then end of the year so that you have a job in the mean time, but don't pay SE taxes next April, do you really want to get in the middle of a dispute between the company and the IRS? No chance of getting your CNA in the mean time and finding work in that line?

Save room for 2, perhaps 3 for me. My son wants to come with me again, and I really ought to invite my daughter too to be fair. (actually, I don't think he want's to come with ME, he's just after the rare treat of eating out. )

Muffins, you have made some inferences and assumptions that are out of line, and wildly inaccurate. Assume whatever you would like, I suppose it doesn't really matter what misconceptions of my thoughts and purposes you have in mind. Nor do I understand how you, Muffins and Anatess, could so completely misunderstand the purpose of what I wrote. Did I ever once say that FB doesn’t have some potential for good? Or, upon really reading what I said, can you see that I was talking about individuals that “cannot see” and are blind to problems. I can only assume that the hyper defensiveness is either because you flatly cannot see the potential for evil, or are so emotionally vested that you can’t read my post correctly. To attempt absurd analogies such as knives, beds, or the internet as a whole is just ludacris and without sound logic. Divest yourself of the unreasonable emotional attachment before trying to discuss something in a civil manner. Do knives really stir up deep seated emotions from hormone-heavy days of youth like private chats with an old fling does? Does FB have the same capabilities of facilitating family history like FamilySearch.org does? Or provide for resources and gospel dissemination akin to LDS.org? What critical life-necessary function does FB play that is analogous to the function that beds are used for? Utter silliness. I have no doubt at all that the concepts and functions of MySpace, FB, and other such sites were inspirations and promptings of the adversary. I don’t disagree that they can be used for good, but the purpose of it's development was to serve his, and mankind’s selfish desires. And I’m saddened that isn’t more obvious to people. If FB were primarily for the good purposes of keeping in contact with family, then why wasn't some ‘family-keeping-in-touch' website the one that became the craze instead of MySpace and FB? Because, such a site wouldn't be serving the self-aggrandization and hook-up purposes that have made MS and FB such successes. If FB's dark underbelly has not yet touched your family or friends, that's good. But, maintaining an "all is well in Zion" attitude about it is sure to make it more likely to creep into your lives. I'm sorry if that ever does happen. It is enough of a problem among the saints that it has been addressed by apostles. That says enough to me right there.

If that is what you got out of my post, then you are clearly misunderstanding what I was trying to convey. Not sure how you came to the conclusion that people are in essence desperately looking for a scape goat.

Warning: [blunt Opinion] Those who cannot see the problems and evils of FB are either ignorant, in denial, out of touch with the Spirit, or some combo of the three. As most tools of technology, it can be used for good purposes. But the creation of FB was not for the purposes of serving God and the salvation of man. I honestly believe that anyone with reasonable discernment can easily understand why FB was created. JeaNette Goates Smith is not the only LMFT seeing FB permeate and destroy marriage that might otherwise have a chance of becoming successful and celestial. I’ll bet that not one of you that is emotionally entrenched already, and defending FB as if it were family, honestly read JeaNett’s article with an open mind, or listed to the link I provided above where another LMFT recounted his experiences of how FB destroys marriage. This isn’t just opinions of rogue LMFT’s. A recent study of divorces in the UK found that at least 20% of divorce filings cited FB as a cause!!! I’m sorry, but anyone that can’t see how FB serves the purposes of the adversary from self-serving ego-building to weakening of the family needs to take a serious look at their own feelings towards FB. [/blunt Opinion]

Excellent points Judo. I cringed a little bit as I read that recount of the interaction. LadyGirl: If this is a pattern of action by him, take serious heed to Judo's words. The whole scenario of him taking over control of most every task and responsibility is also unnerving. If you don't wake up now, you might wake up later and find yourself far more trapped in an abusive relationship that you ever thought possible. Time to shake things up for sure. I'd second following the advice of Judo and Anatess and see what happens. But something has got to change. You can keep doing what you are doing, and neither should he. The actions of you both are not going to result in a happy marriage down the road.

The Matt Townsend Show's (a weekly relationship talk radio show) topic this last Saturday was FB: Friend or Foe to Marriage. It's a worthwhile listen. http://pandora.bonnint.net/audio/2010_02_20_matttownsend.mp3

While I never had any such direction given to me in any of the three missions (and five mission presidents) I served in, in each, the guidance was very clear - Two elders should not be meeting with two females. No matter the purpose, circumstances, etc, it was a no-no. Appearances of a date to bystanders was to be avoided as much as any other potential problems. The advice was to allways keep odd numbers in such a situation such as eating out.

I'm glad for the update and change. On the negative side, parking was beyond capacity, and it was hard to get into a session on Saturday! Apparently it was a near-record breaking attendance day. The Bountiful temple is already VERY busy. It won't be very fun to have Ogden off-line for up to two years. Perhaps this is part of the reason for the announcement of a Brigham City temple? I do hope that it is operating before the Ogden is closed for renovation.

Some good advice so far. Glad your OP was long as it helped to understand the situation. I wanted to add yet another voice saying don't think kids are the answer!!! Having children will not make things better. They likely will not 'inspire' him to step up. It's adds lots of stresses and distance in a marriage, and the marriage needs to be firmly founded before the kids come IMO. It’s not fair to children to bring them into a marriage as a “tool”, rather than because of the desire to serve and bring spirits to earth. He clearly needs to grow up. It's hard to say if that will ever happen. Sorry to be a little harsh, but I think there are some things you need to look at in yourself too. Figuring out if what you want, as has been pointed out, is one of them. Another is to look at how you are contributing (perhaps giving too much?), or taking offense when not necessary. I also read a lot of focus on the negative (I understand that there is a particular issue you are seeking advice on, so the post may not be representative). It just ‘feels’ like his actions and inactivity may have become a beam in your eye skewing your view of his mote. The only thing you can really change is YOU. You cannot change him. So, you must figure out if you can put up with this, if this relationship is worth maintaining your vows for, etc. Finally, the next time you do an endowment session, listen to your covenant to follow your husband. It has a qualifier in there. It's is not a unilateral/unconditional covenant. Books to read: Behind the Smiling Faces, and Too Good To Leave, Too Bad to Stay

This topic yet AGAIN??? Oh brother.

Boy do I ever wish that other clothing articles that I get at for-profit stores were so inexpensive!!!

20 years ago, I believe it was different. So, thanks for the 'modern' understanding.

I don't think that's quite right. Sure, it's been more than 20 years since I was asked the questions, I but I do recall being asked about sexual activity, illegal drug use, and murder. All past and/or present. Not just what was an active practice.There should be some RM's on here with experience with this. I never did interviews, so I was unable to answer the question.

How much of prior misdeeds need to be discussed, and with whom, regarding past sins, esp in regards to the law of chastity? Are these issues handled by the district leader alone? Zone leader? Or is there someone else involved such as the mission president? I would expect that pre-marital sex is not uncommon among adult converts. Any insight as to what my friend might expect would be appreciated.

When I bake filets, I used simply a litt bit of butter rubbed over the top (and just enough in the glass dish to keep them from sticking), sprinkle with lemmon pepper, and perhas a little bit of general seasoning salt. Simple as that. Bass also does good breaded in flour with some seasoning salt mixed in, and fried in light oil.

If you are in Chicago, neither species is native there. So, it is likely an escaped pet. Corals are rarely, if ever, kept as pets. Given the speed you describe, it is most likely a milksnake of one of the various subspecies. Honduran or Nelsons being the most common pets. (yes, they look like corals and kings too) If your aim is to kill it, there are some methods that work for trapping. I'm not sure I want to details those being I'm a snake-lover. But no, there is no good way to expect to be able to find and/or get rid of it in a timely manner - even with lethal methods. Capturing a loose snake is a game of patience, frequent checking, and a lot of luck. Not sure what else to tell you. Good luck?

So sorry to hear that. I know precisely what you are dealing with. My experience wasn't exactly the same as what you describe above, but I know the repeated hurts, and the neglect that come from the situation. After 14.5 years of marriage, my divorce will be finalized any day now. Huge relief.Severe cases of ADHD can be hard to treat appropriately, but if he isn't willing to utilize the blessings of modern medicine that God has provided, then he is absolutely stuck, and will never change. It is strange to me how many with ADHD are adamant about not seeking treatment. IMO, it's almost a factor to consider - how resistant is the individual to modifying their behavior in a manner they would expect others to do in order for the good of the relationship? If you would like to be part of a private password-protected spouse-of-ADHD forum, send me a PM. There is a great resource out there where all the participants really get how frustrating it is. They also understand how no one except those that have lived it will ever understand. If you haven't already obtained a copy, I would highly recommend Is It You, Me, Or Adult ADHD?. Other books are also listed on another post on here. See: http://www.lds.net/forums/advice-board/25622-resources-links-your-marriage.html#post437248 Best of luck to you.