classylady

It's 8 am. I've been awake since 4 am. I fell asleep around 2 am. Two hours of sleep is not enough! There are some nights, like last night, when my brain won't slow down. I worry. I stress. Then I worry and stress some more about life. Then I worry and stress about not getting enough sleep. It's a never-ending cycle.

I really, really don't like swearing! I don't have it mastered, yet. Wish I did. My kids could probably count on one hand the number of times they've heard me swear. Same with my husband. I believe they know I'm upset if a swear word comes out of my mouth! They would probably say, "Mom!" I just wish some of my adult kids didn't like to swear as much as they do. i also cringe when I hear swearing. Nowdays, it's like you can't get away from it. Taking the Lord's name in vain is especially hard for me to hear. Almost every movie or tv show has it in it. I really wish it wasn't such a popular thing to say.

I see nothing morally wrong with having sexy photos of your spouse. I agree with what others have stated about being careful how those photos are shared between the two of you. I do have a concern because of a personal experience. My husband and his ex-wife had taken a few nude photos of each other. They divorced. My husband had all their photos after the divorce and he had forgotten about the few nude ones. He had me help him go through all their pictures to help decide which ones he wanted to keep, and of course those particular photos were in the big box of pictures. I don't think his ex would be too happy knowing I saw those photos of her. So, what you think is private now, could one day be seen by others. What happens to the privacy of those photos, emails, texts, etc. when you die? I can just imagine my children going through my computer and phone when I'm gone. They know my passwords. I want them to have access to all the photos of the family and all the family history I've scanned. Hopefully, there is nothing there that is too embarrassing.

Haha!

Circumcision of boys has been an emotional and hot topic for years. Parents should educate themselves on the matter, make a decision about it and then be at peace with their decision. I had 3 boys (4 when I count my stepson). My husband and I educated ourselves, made a decision about it, and now neither of us is agonizing about our decision. Sure, there's more information out there than years ago, but, I'm not going to worry about it. None of our sons have complained about our choice. There's no need to make this such a difficult choice. Do what you feel is best, and be at peace with it-- no matter what your decision is. You may even make a different decision with your older boys than with your younger ones. That's okay too. Don't overly worry about it!

And me!

I bought a pretty nice guitar at a yard sale this summer. (Plus, two other cheaper models. $25 total for all three). I have always wanted to learn to play. I don't want to hire a teacher. Any ideas on how to learn to play? I play the piano so I understand notes, chords, etc. Are there any good books on teaching yourself? Or are there any good YouTube videos that you know about? Hopefully, I'm not too old to learn. I'm actually quite excited about this! I've wanted to do this for years. Two of my children learned to play the guitar very well. But, they had teachers that we paid for. The kids took their guitars (which we had bought for them) with them when they left home, and one child decided to appropriate my husband's guitar too. So, this summer I decided I wanted a guitar for myself and I will learn, hopefully, to play.

The Mount Timpanogus and Bountiful temples are similar in design. Both are beautiful. If you have the chance to travel south to Provo, the new Provo City Center Temple is unique. If I were you, that is one I would really consider visiting.

1. Learn to play the guitar. (This summer I have found 3 guitars at yard sales that I couldn't pass by). 2. See Yosemite National Park. 3. Travel to the States I haven't been to yet. 4. Travel to Japan, Australia, Italy, Ireland, Scotland, and Denmark. (Basically I'd like to see all of Europe). 5. See Carlsbad Caverns. 6. Go to DisneyWorld. 7. Watch a Broadway play in NYC. 8. See Mount Rushmore. 9. Visit the church history sites. 10. Learn how to add photos, etc. to Family Search. 11. Visit New Orleans.

Hemisphere, I have many friends from Germany. I love your country and your countrymen. All of my German friends who are endowed members of the church are good, honest people. I don't believe any of them have lied to get their temple recommend. Are they perfect? No. But, they are repentant and trying their best. I think they would be dismayed at your summation of their character. i was a missionary in Germany quite a few years ago. I have tried to stay in touch with many members of the church I met while there and grew to love with all my heart. If I could, I would be visiting Germany 2 to 3 times a year. But, sadly, funds do not allow that. So, I get over there as often as I can. Lately, about every other year.

I'm not an expert, but I have heard the same thing. Edit: I was in Rheinfelden, Germany in December visiting a dear friend. Her son also lives in Rheinfelden but works in Basel Switzerland. He makes a much higher wage than what he could get in Germany. From what they were saying, it's even hard for a German to find work in Switzerland. They also talked about the mind-set of most workers in Germany. They claimed that here in the US many people are more open to wanting to go into business for themselves or explore MLM's. In Germany the worker wants to find a company to work for and have their job for life and retirement guaranteed rather than taking a risk.

If I had to move I would probably look for a place close to some family members. What keeps me here in Utah is my family. My husband and I have thought of moving over the years but we were never able to cut our ties with family.

If I moved to Germany I would think about living in Rheinfelden, but work just over the border in Basel, Switzerland. Wages are much higher in Switzerland, but cost of living in less in Germany.

So? What are you trying to say? A lot of widowers are sealed to more than one wife. It's not a problem.

I guess my husband and I are considered an older couple--We are both in our sixties. It is true, that sleep is more difficult to come by, and it doesn't take much to wake us up, and then it might be hours before either of us can go back to sleep. There have been a couple of nights where I have decided to sleep on the couch, but my husband doesn't like it. If we're not in bed together, then he doesn't sleep well either. If the two of you are experiencing problems with desire/libido, have either of you had your hormone levels checked? Men's testosterone levels drop considerably as they age, and this can have a huge impact on libido. If my husband was no longer in the mood, ever, that would be a big red flag. Also, do the two of you have any nights where you both have the same schedule? I would make an effort on those nights to sleep in the same bed together. If your husband resists that suggestion, I would seriously think about counseling, and have him get a thorough physical with his testosterone levels checked. In my opinion, sleeping in separate bedrooms is not ideal for a marriage, no matter what age.

Quite a few members of the church have plural sealings. There are a lot of widowers that have plural sealings. Even women who have been married to more than one man, once they are all deceased can be sealed to all her husbands.

Thank you, Pam! Well said.

I love camping. When we were first married some of our earliest purchases was camping gear. We had a tent trailer for a few years, but now we're back to just a tent. We have gone on three week road trips where we would camp in our tent most of the time, but then splurge on a motel every once-in-awhile. I've brought my babies camping with us. It can be hard when it's raining and muddy and you have toddlers. Now that my husband and I are older, we can't sleep on the ground comfortably anymore.. Neither of us like air mattresses, so we bought 3 inch foam pads. The pads do take up a lot of space, but we have a pick-up truck so we can pack a lot of stuff in the back. We don't camp as much, but we try to get out at least once or twice a year.

As Jane_Doe has said, you being their biological mother will never change. And even if your children are sealed to their father and his new wife, that doesn't necessarily mean they will all live under one big house in the next life. My understanding of the next life is that our children will be adults, and will live within their own household just as our own adult children in this life do. They will come and visit Mom or Dad, grandchildren will visit grandparents, parents will visit children etc., just like we do now. Basically, how I understand it, they are being sealed into the family of God. That is a good thing.

AngelMarvel, I'm so glad you are still with us.

If polygamy is reinstated I believe some women in the church wouldn't mind sharing their husband. But, I also see many women not wanting to be in such a relationship. Culturally, women have changed so much since polygamy was instituted in the 1800's. Now days, women expect to be an equal partner in the marriage, not the property of their husband. My opinion is that it would be much harder to institute polygamy in our current cultural situation. Women want and expect emotional commitment/security and to be their husband's number-one. Now days, outside of the church, if a woman desires to have a child she can find a donor without being married. Our cultural is so different from the 1800's.

There are lots of innocent romance novels without any sex in them at all--just a romance story.

Why can't neither be an option? I would run away as fast as possible from either man. If I actually had to choose, at gunpoint, to marry one of these men I would most likely choose the one who watched porn. From my perspective, because I am married to a man who was married before, the pain of being compared to a real former lover is at times unbearable. (And, my husband was not promiscuous). It is the most difficult trial I have had to bear in my marriage. I also understand that the comparison to women on porn sites is hard too, but I would prefer the "pretend" relationship over a "real" relationship anytime.

It's a commandment to multiply and replenish the earth. I believe the Lord will provide a way. But, the Lord will help those who help themselves. To me that means the parents have learned the skills to provide not only for themselves but for their children. And, I agree with Anatess, we don't always need XYZ to have children. IMO, the biggest component of providing for a family, whether there are children or not, is shelter. If there is a home then food and clothing can be economically provided. Children do not need their own bedroom. Rooms can be shared--even beds. In our current culture that seems to be so taboo, but it has been the norm for ages. Growing up, I shared a bedroom and the same bed with an older sister. I admit, my older sister probably didn't appreciate sharing with a younger sister, but that was life back then. I have an uncle and aunt who had 14 children and lived in a small two bedroom house. They probably could have afforded a larger home because they had a good income, but they chose to stay in their small house. They retrofitted the back porch into another bedroom, and then when the boys were teenagers, they fixed up the largish shed outside into two bedrooms. One of the boys even fixed up the attic for bedroom space. Their home was the cool place to be. I loved visiting them. Also, keep in mind, by the time the younger children were born, some of the older children were already young adults and living on their own. Their home was sometimes a little chaotic, but love abounded, and I don't think any of them would have had it any other way.