classylady

Since I am a stepmother I have done a lot of studying on second marriages and step-parenting. There is a high divorce rate of 2nd marriages when children are involved. I think about 67 %. Even though you and your fiancé love each other, your children may not love her or ever grow to love her.  Whereas, the stepparent usually makes a conscious choice to love the stepchildren, the stepchildren usually do not make that choice. There are almost always loyalty issues for the children involved. That in turn may cause relationship problems between the married couple. The stepparent often feels marginalized and can feel like they will never be number one in their spouses life. It is a very difficult relationship!!! Most stepparents have no idea how difficult it will be before getting married.  Premarital counseling may be a good idea, not only for you and your fiancé, but also for the children.
I have also been a stepchild. My mother remarried about 6 years after my father died. I did not like my stepfather! Looking back, now as an adult, I can see that he wasn’t such a bad guy, but I was a young teen, and there was no way that I was going to accept him. And, I admit, that I (nor my younger siblings) made it easy for him and that in turn made it hard for my mother. Their marriage lasted less than six months. 
 
I was at a meeting with Dallin H. Oaks, and he mentioned that he did not start dating after his wife passed away until all his children were on board with it. I believe he said one of his daughters had a more difficult time with the issue, and he waited until she was also okay with him dating/remarrying. Because, all the children were accepting, the step-parenting issues were at a minimum. 
 
I hope you and your family can find peace as you find answers together as a family.

Since I am a stepmother I have done a lot of studying on second marriages and step-parenting. There is a high divorce rate of 2nd marriages when children are involved. I think about 67 %. Even though you and your fiancé love each other, your children may not love her or ever grow to love her.  Whereas, the stepparent usually makes a conscious choice to love the stepchildren, the stepchildren usually do not make that choice. There are almost always loyalty issues for the children involved. That in turn may cause relationship problems between the married couple. The stepparent often feels marginalized and can feel like they will never be number one in their spouses life. It is a very difficult relationship!!! Most stepparents have no idea how difficult it will be before getting married.  Premarital counseling may be a good idea, not only for you and your fiancé, but also for the children.
I have also been a stepchild. My mother remarried about 6 years after my father died. I did not like my stepfather! Looking back, now as an adult, I can see that he wasn’t such a bad guy, but I was a young teen, and there was no way that I was going to accept him. And, I admit, that I (nor my younger siblings) made it easy for him and that in turn made it hard for my mother. Their marriage lasted less than six months. 
 
I was at a meeting with Dallin H. Oaks, and he mentioned that he did not start dating after his wife passed away until all his children were on board with it. I believe he said one of his daughters had a more difficult time with the issue, and he waited until she was also okay with him dating/remarrying. Because, all the children were accepting, the step-parenting issues were at a minimum. 
 
I hope you and your family can find peace as you find answers together as a family.

Since I am a stepmother I have done a lot of studying on second marriages and step-parenting. There is a high divorce rate of 2nd marriages when children are involved. I think about 67 %. Even though you and your fiancé love each other, your children may not love her or ever grow to love her.  Whereas, the stepparent usually makes a conscious choice to love the stepchildren, the stepchildren usually do not make that choice. There are almost always loyalty issues for the children involved. That in turn may cause relationship problems between the married couple. The stepparent often feels marginalized and can feel like they will never be number one in their spouses life. It is a very difficult relationship!!! Most stepparents have no idea how difficult it will be before getting married.  Premarital counseling may be a good idea, not only for you and your fiancé, but also for the children.
I have also been a stepchild. My mother remarried about 6 years after my father died. I did not like my stepfather! Looking back, now as an adult, I can see that he wasn’t such a bad guy, but I was a young teen, and there was no way that I was going to accept him. And, I admit, that I (nor my younger siblings) made it easy for him and that in turn made it hard for my mother. Their marriage lasted less than six months. 
 
I was at a meeting with Dallin H. Oaks, and he mentioned that he did not start dating after his wife passed away until all his children were on board with it. I believe he said one of his daughters had a more difficult time with the issue, and he waited until she was also okay with him dating/remarrying. Because, all the children were accepting, the step-parenting issues were at a minimum. 
 
I hope you and your family can find peace as you find answers together as a family.

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

My family was in England last April and actually stayed with several English families. We were always asked how we felt about Trump.  We met quite a few people who love Trump. It surprised me because I was under the impression that most Europeans hated Trump. Those that I met who loved Trump were also for Brexit and quite conservative. They see their country as failing and to them immigration was a big part of it. They feel they are losing their culture. They don’t dare let their daughters even go shopping alone because of the fear of rape by the immigrants. Those who loved Trump are glad he is stirring the pot. They are tired of having to keep their mouths shut because it isn’t “politically correct” and because anything they say against the immigrants is considered racist. Housing prices are expensive. They blamed that on the immigration policies. The immigrants get the housing and there is very little left for the Brits. Young people can’t afford housing, etc. We had some great political conversations. My experience must have been different than yours.
When I travelled to Italy, Germany, Switzerland, and France this year I didn’t have the opportunity to get into politics with anyone.  A couple of years ago I was able to visit a friend in Germany and she and her husband and adult sons liked Trump. I think Europeans are very similar to US citizens. If you listen to the news almost everything you hear is negative about Trump and everyone hating him, but if you start talking to some of the regular folks, and they feel like you won’t ridicule them, they will start to tell you what they like about Trump. Many Europeans are tired of the liberal policies and are afraid of where their leaders are taking their countries.

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

I admit I don’t often get up and share my testimony in Fast and Testimony Meeting. But, when I do share my testimony whether in Fast and Testimony Meeting, or in a Primary lesson, Sunday School lesson, or Relief Society lesson, I feel the responsibility that is on my shoulders. My responsibility is to teach or share with the Spirit, and to help my fellow members and/or investigators feel that Spirit. Because I do have a testimony and have felt the Spirit testify to me of the truthfulness of the gospel I feel I will have let my Savior down if I don’t testify. So, I will use the terminology “I know”, or “I testify in the name of Jesus Christ that ...”. And then I try to clarify why I know. I feel because I do know, I need to help those who are struggling. I want them to learn for themselves and know without a doubt so that when trials come their way, they have an anchor to hold on to. If they don’t know for themselves, when a a pivotal point comes in their life I hope they might remember me, Sister Classylady, and remember she knew! I hope they can hold onto my knowledge until they get their own. This is a responsibility I feel very strongly about. 

I had an amazing experience this evening brothers and sisters. My younger sister asked me to give her a blessing. While what I said was for her ears alone, I was covered in the Holy Ghost while I was speaking to her. I've given many blessings in my life, but this one was a very special one. I knew I was speaking for God. I've always taken my blessings seriously, and have tried to feel inspired and I believe that I said what God wanted me too. But this time, like only a handful of other times in my life, I literally felt the power of the Holy Ghost descend upon me, almost like a light blanket although that description is inadequate. The holy Melchesidek priesthood is real. God has restored it through Joseph Smith, and it's power comes from our Saviour Jesus Christ. I just wanted to share that with you all this evening.

Whoa.,. this is gonna be tough... I can’t argue with @JohnsonJones anymore! 
Tacloban Mission.  That city that got wiped out by a typhoon a few years ago.  He leaves in January.

I want to thank you for this, but probably from a different direction than you would normally think.
Today has been particularly difficult for me.  I was asked earlier today to write a letter for an old acquaintance.  I first met this man in the church almost 46 years ago.  While I've known him he has done all sorts of criminal and other types of acts.  He was called as a High Priest many years prior to me, even with that type of record (and part of the reason at times I've struggle with me and others not being called High Priests when we were younger, and yet some of those who are blatantly wicked seem to be granted such things at times), and was a member of the Bishopric, something which was not blessed upon me until more recently.
He has never felt remorse for what he has done.  He has always felt he could get away with things.  Despite all this, we have been friends.  He has helped with charity at times in helping others, and some of his actions were due to a flawed sense of morality on his part I suppose.  That said, crimes and actions finally caught up to him.  He was sent to jail and is now guilty of murder.  He is awaiting sentencing.  Some others who know him sent out messages asking for people to write character references or letters for this man. 
I was asked if I could write a character reference for him this morning (not that it was due this morning, just asked if I would by someone today).  I immediately felt conflicted.  Instead of writing a character letter I wanted to write a letter to the judge asking for them to lock him up and toss away the key.  He still doesn't really have any remorse, the only remorse he has on this is that he finally got caught.  He had been committing adultery and in the process of events that led him to murder someone innocent.  It was simply the capstone of a long life of doing things and seemingly to get away with it.  There were other events of questionable nature in his past, including other periods of questionable indiscretion that he simply waltzed on by seemingly without being touched. 
I was his friend, and yet here I was wanting him to have as severe a punishment as possible.  I had to ask myself, had I truly forgiven him.  Was this desire out of wanting him to pay for the crimes he was actually in prison for, or some deeper rooted grudge out of anger and frustration.  I have had a tough time trying to sort this out today.  I have had very mixed emotions and truly wanted to write a letter exactly opposite of what he wanted and send it in to hopefully make him have the harshest sentence possible.  Even if the church gave him a free pass, I suppose I wanted him to at last have some repercussions of the damage he had done to others.
I couldn't get past this mindset today.  I've tried.  I was not making any progress.  How I could feel that towards this man who had been an acquaintance for so long, who we've kept in contact despite being in different areas for such a while was in many ways driving away the spirit at times for me today.
We are to forgive all men, and I thought I had forgiven him a long time ago...so this was suddenly a new struggle.  Perhaps it was because I suddenly was not just expected to let him on his way, but actually write something to show that he was of good character.  It set many emotions of pain and anger inside me.  I couldn't seem to resolve it within myself.
Then I read your post above.  Ironically, the spirit used it to talk to me.  My problem was that I had already condemned him in my heart, something I am NOT qualified to do.  I am not his judge (nor even in his church leadership).  I am not the Lord and have no right to judge, and yet, within my heart I had done so.  I know this man probably has no remorse about his actual crimes and sins, but it is not my place to decide whether he's condemned or not in this life.  It is the Savior's and as you have posted, the Savior (as far as I know) has not condemned the man in this life either.  It is up to the man whether he will actually repent at some point or not, but it is simply my place to try to truly forgive him for any offense that I may have seen done.  In this my sin was that I was not as forgiving as I should have been.  Instead I wanted justice and to a small degree, I suppose revenge.  That is not the Lord's way.
AS I realized this, I had a huge burden taken off my heart and I now realize I don't have to feel these feelings towards him.  I don't plan on writing a letter on his behalf, but I don't have the desire anymore to write a letter asking for a harsh judgment either.  I am happy to allow whatever happens, to happen.  If his friends and family write letters to soften his sentence, so be it.  I can continue to write the man letters in jail to show our friendship, and to visit him occasionally, but there is no need for me to feel anger or frustration over this issue any longer.  I should leave it in the Lord's hands as I should have all along, and let the Lord handle it as he will.  If the Lord forgives the man to exaltation, then I should be happy for the man, and if instead the man suffers for what he has done or pays the price, I should also accept what the Lord wills in the matter to be done.
So, I know you posted it probably as a different matter, but your post helped open the way for the Spirit to help me overcome a great struggle I was having today.  I thank you for the post that you made.

The story goes that Thomas Moore, the famous 19th-century Irish poet and composer, married a beautiful woman named Elizabeth who contracted smallpox. She survived the dread disease, but as was common with smallpox survivors, was left badly scarred. She subsequently locked herself in her room, refusing to come out for shame of her face being so disfigured. Thomas then wrote this poem to reassure her. I hope the story is true; it's a nice story, in any case. This is one of a few poems I have actually bothered to commit to memory. 
Believe me, if all those endearing young charms
Which I gaze on so fondly today
Were to change by tomorrow and fleet in mine arms,
Like fairy gifts fading away,
Thou wouldst still be ador'd as this moment thou art,
Let thy loveliness fade as it will;
And around the dear ruin, each wish of my heart
Would entwine itself verdantly still.
It is not while beauty and youth are thine own
And thy cheeks unprofan'd by a tear
That the fervor and faith of a soul can be known
To which time will but make thee more dear.
No, the heart that has truly lov'd never forgets,
But as truly loves on to the close
As the sunflower turns on her god, when he sets,
The same look which she turned when he rose.
(For those my age or older, this might seem familiar if you hear the tune the song has traditionally been set to. Think Saturday morning cartoons.)
 

Here’s a few things we do: Attend church. Usually stay home after church and try to take a nap—especially now since we’re older and have less energy. Read. Some Sundays we visit extended family. Try to have family dinner. I like to do family history on Sundays. We used to have a Family Home Evening lesson on Sunday when the kids were young.

We don’t shop on Sundays! Nor do recreational activities like swimming, fairs, amusement parks, or attend movies or plays. We also did not have friends birthday parties for the kids. We might do birthday cake with family only, but never a friends bash. We also don’t do yard work on Sunday.

I wish I could remember exactly what he said. We were asked not to record, video tape, or take photographs. He talked about how so many in Africa only have one meal a day. The average length of life for men is around 44 years of age. He mentioned AIDS being one of the causes of the young death rate. They live in very small houses, perhaps one room, often caring not only for their own family, but often the children of their brother because he has died. The young men (and women) are needed to help support the family. If they go on missions that financial support is not there. And, as I mentioned earlier, some of these young men and women are the only members.
As to fast offerings, he didn’t say much more than, here they are, poorest of poor, hungry, how they give of their meager earnings—pennies, nickels, and need food and basics to survive, and in Utah some are unwise with their income and now need help in paying their mortgage using fast offering money. I think he was trying to portray the huge difference in needs and wants. It sounded like he said these poor saints are willing to help us in Utah, and it’s usually due to our unwise decisions, yet they need the very basics.

I wish I could remember exactly what he said. We were asked not to record, video tape, or take photographs. He talked about how so many in Africa only have one meal a day. The average length of life for men is around 44 years of age. He mentioned AIDS being one of the causes of the young death rate. They live in very small houses, perhaps one room, often caring not only for their own family, but often the children of their brother because he has died. The young men (and women) are needed to help support the family. If they go on missions that financial support is not there. And, as I mentioned earlier, some of these young men and women are the only members.
As to fast offerings, he didn’t say much more than, here they are, poorest of poor, hungry, how they give of their meager earnings—pennies, nickels, and need food and basics to survive, and in Utah some are unwise with their income and now need help in paying their mortgage using fast offering money. I think he was trying to portray the huge difference in needs and wants. It sounded like he said these poor saints are willing to help us in Utah, and it’s usually due to our unwise decisions, yet they need the very basics.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

I was at a German Mission reunion last night for all German speaking missions.  Elder Bednar and his wife spoke to us and he specifically touched on this topic. He asked us to please stop with the myths, etc. that so many of us adhere to. He said the policy changes such as witnesses, ministering, youth program, missionaries able to call home on a weekly basis, etc. are because we are a world wide church. It needs to be simplified, but the eternal truths are there. It needs to be family based. For example, he talked about Africa, and the growth there. Young adults  have the obligation to care for their parents and support the family. Often times, the young person is the only member. If they go on a mission they are unable to to help support the family. If they have no contact with the parents for the two years while serving, the parents become more antagonistic towards the church. The change in policy for missionaries to call home was for them, not us (Utahns, Americans), but we benefit. I wish I could state this the way Elder Bednar did.
He talked about the Saints in Africa who are the poorest in the world. They pay their pennies and other meager change for fast offerings, which goes into the coffers of the church, so someone here in Utah can pay their mortgage because they were unwise with their money, He was blunt.
He talked about revelation and how it is often given, line upon line, precept upon precept. Most of the church policy changes are not abrupt changes. Each particular prophet has been working for years in specific areas of their stewardship. These are not new ideas to them, but it comes line upon line. 

I’m grateful I was able to hear Elder Bednar talk. The Spirit was so strong. His wife’s comments were just as powerful. I truly feel blessed to have been there.

Indeed..  We have Culture, or the Unwritten Order of things... Which I think is very similar to what the scripture call 'Traditions of our Fathers'  This is not doctrine or truth...  It might however have been a good idea or helpful or even necessary at some point in our history. And maybe it still is or maybe it is not any more.  It is nice to see those with the proper stewardship going through and removing that which they determine is no longer useful or correct at this time

For those of you who asked for the update, we're having a little boy.