gaspah Posted April 6, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 (edited) awesome it seems to be the concensus.. its just i had other members tell me to throw out my coffee when i first joined... but im not tempted by coffee so i didnt see why i needed to. my friend had a coffee at my house and i drank water, he was comfortable and i was also. :) sorry didnt have time to reply to my thread all weekend.. but busy busy busy.. i did get 10min to myself from sat morning to sunday night :S i dont think i'd offer alcohol though. Edited April 6, 2009 by gaspah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Personally, I think this is a host/guest courtesy and common sense issue. If I am visiting an LDS person's house for a few hours and they offer me tea or coffee, great, I will drink it. I would not go out of my way to insist, that's just rude. When our family stays at my LDS SIL's house for a few days, we usually buy extra food and things like tea, since we know they do not have it. They do not mind that we drink tea in their house, why would they? We would not bring alcohol into the house because that's a different issue entirely. M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 (edited) We would not bring alcohol into the house because that's a different issue entirely.I'm curious why. Or is it because copious amounts of tea or coffee effects ones behavior a whole lot less (though I suppose a regular coffee/tea drinker has gotten over the hyper long ago) than alcohol? Edited April 7, 2009 by Dravin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 I'm curious why. Or is it because copious amounts of tea or coffee effects ones behavior a whole lot less (though I suppose a regular coffee/tea drinker has gotten over the hyper long ago) than alcohol?Because tea and coffee are regular drinking staples and alcohol is not. Alcohol is something to have on special occasions; tea and coffee are every day drinks. It may be hard to believe, but tea and coffee are normal; especially if you are not LDS.M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 When I have lunch with my Jewish co-workers, we go to a place that observes kosher law. Now, I'm (obviously) not Jewish by religion (plenty in my family history though), but I respect their establishment and I respect their observance of their religion. I don't ask for a cheeseburger and I don't expect to be served one. Allow me to expand on this: Our homes are to be treated like a temple - a sacred place and a refuge from the rest of the world. Would you expect to find coffee in an LDS temple? Why would it be okay in your home? What does that say about you and how seriously you practice your faith? [please don't take this personally, just as "food for thought".] However, if someone brought their own coffee, I wouldn't "kick them out" either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aesa Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Mormons can drink decaf can't they? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheyCallMeMom Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 I guess I am the odd man out.. I am more concerned with keeping my house in line with the WOW than complying with guests addictions, as I stated previously Would you also allow someone to smoke in your home? use foul language? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LolaBella Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 We always had tea and coffee in the house growing up as my Uncle and family and Nan arent members. It was just the norm. We didnt drink it, it was just for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamie123 Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Mormons can drink decaf can't they?I believe not. I once bought some decaf specially so I'd have something to offer the missionaries - then discovered when they arrived that they weren't allowed to drink that either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WillowTheWhisp Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Allow me to expand on this: Our homes are to be treated like a temple - a sacred place and a refuge from the rest of the world. Would you expect to find coffee in an LDS temple? Why would it be okay in your home? What does that say about you and how seriously you practice your faith?[please don't take this personally, just as "food for thought".]How would you reconcile that with part member families? If the husband is a tea drinking non-member can the home never be a refuge? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 hi there.. just wondering, I still have coffee in my house (i have trouble throwing stuff away, but ive kept the WoW) and my family and a few of my friends are non-members.. Someone is coming past my house early in the morning and was wondering if i had coffee? Am I allowed to serve them coffee in my home or what? I'm just not sure.thanks No....be example. It will open doors for questions to why. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 How would you reconcile that with part member families? If the husband is a tea drinking non-member can the home never be a refuge?You do the best you can with what you've got.The difference in this example is the person is LIVING in the home, not a guest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john doe Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Mormons can drink decaf can't they? No. The interpretation of hot drinks is 'coffee and tea', there is no ingredient specified. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabelpa Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Here in the UK tea drinking is more commonplace among the great Unwashed,and a staple of the washed. To be unable to provide tea to guests is a faux pas and not one of the things commonly done. Many LDS homes I have visited here have stale tea bags stashed away so they can make their guests horrible tea. The tea-drinking guests rarely ask again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Because tea and coffee are regular drinking staples and alcohol is not. Alcohol is something to have on special occasions; tea and coffee are every day drinks. It may be hard to believe, but tea and coffee are normal; especially if you are not LDS.Its not hard to believe (why would it be hard to believe?), I'm aware of that. I'm also aware there are people who like a beer after work on a regular basis and such is a staple to them not something reserved for special occasions. There is also wine drank on a regular basis with dinner in some households. I imagine that becomes even more the case in some other countries (just like how tea and coffee seem to be even more of a staple in the UK).Also I consider sparkling cider something for special occasions (or maybe some expensive cheese like an apricot Stilton I bought a while back. [side note: Yum]) and that has no impact as to my thoughts (the it being for special occasions factor) on bringing it with me to somebodies' house or having it brought into mine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WillowTheWhisp Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 'a cuppa' is the great British solution to most problems. It's more than just a habit like drinking wine with a meal or going to the pub for a beer.If someone has an accident, someone else will make them a cup of tea. If someone receives bad news someone will make them a cup of tea. If someone dies someone will make the relatives a cup of tea. If someone is worried, ................ you guessed it ................ someone will make them a cup of tea. It's the universal British cure-all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Churchmouse Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Were you proscribed from eating fish with them?I've never eaten fish in my life. From the smell alone I don't know how anyone can eat it:confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 I've never eaten fish in my life. From the smell alone I don't know how anyone can eat it:confused:It may not make sense but good fish doesn't smell fishy. I'm not saying is has no smell, it just doesn't reek of 'fishy'. If somebody pulls out some fish from the refrigerator and you can smell if from crossed the house something has gone horribly wrong. Not sure if I'm making any sense here, someone who knows what I'm talking about and who has superior communication skills may be able to clarify. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elgama Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 I have tea. coffee and an ashtray present, anyone wanting alcohol say at Christmas is asked to bring their own and keep it in moderation. I even have full fat milk and butter for my Mum as she won't touch spread or semi skimmed My family are non members, my Mum could not visit without being allowed to smoke, my brother will smoke outside, My Dad and best friend would not visit without tea and coffee on offer. I personally think I have little enough family for my kids to spend time with I want them to have contact with them. My children understand there are different rules if you are LDS. -Charley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WillowTheWhisp Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 It may not make sense but good fish doesn't smell fishy.I know exacly what you mean. Good fresh fish does not smell the way fish markets do. Also 'fish' is a very broad description. There are many kinds of fish, some quite bland and some very tasty, some oily, some flaky. Then there are sea fish, fresh water fish, shellfish.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 There are many kinds of fish, some quite bland and some very tasty, some oily, some flaky. Then there are sea fish, fresh water fish, shellfish....Yep, carp is much different from northern pike (one of my personal favorites having grown up with it in Alaska) which is much different from halibut which is much different from pacific salmon (another personal favorite) which is much different from scallops. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted April 8, 2009 Report Share Posted April 8, 2009 Its not hard to believe (why would it be hard to believe?)....Because there are a few LDS who view coffee and tea as evil. They are not just merely substances that you have been asked not to consume. The mere question of asking if it's okay to offer them to guests brings responses of horror at the thought of even having them in an LDS home (what would people think?). ...I'm also aware there are people who like a beer after work on a regular basis and such is a staple to them not something reserved for special occasions. There is also wine drank on a regular basis with dinner in some households. I imagine that becomes even more the case in some other countries (just like how tea and coffee seem to be even more of a staple in the UK).It sounds like you're describing what people do on a regular basis in their own homes, not necessarily what they would do when visiting friends who are LDS.Also I consider sparkling cider something for special occasions (or maybe some expensive cheese like an apricot Stilton I bought a while back. [side note: Yum]) and that has no impact as to my thoughts (the it being for special occasions factor) on bringing it with me to somebodies' house or having it brought into mine.And if your friends told you that they would be offended if you brought your sparkling cider and cheese into their house, wouldn't you find that odd?M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 8, 2009 Report Share Posted April 8, 2009 Because there are a few LDS who view coffee and tea as evil. They are not just merely substances that you have been asked not to consume. The mere question of asking if it's okay to offer them to guests brings responses of horror at the thought of even having them in an LDS home (what would people think?). And that has nothing at all to do with how common it is.It sounds like you're describing what people do on a regular basis in their own homes, not necessarily what they would do when visiting friends who are LDS.Yes, but why not is the question I'm asking. Because society says so is a perfectly valid answer. I was just wondering why you thought it so different to bring in one item they don't drink and consume it there verses another item they don't drink (for the same reason) and consume it over there. And if your friends told you that they would be offended if you brought your sparkling cider and cheese into their house, wouldn't you find that odd?Maybe, but I'd respect it I certainly wouldn't be offended, their house not mine. Just like I'd respect a vegetarian who asked me not to bring over jerky or a Jew a cheese burger. *shrug* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted April 8, 2009 Report Share Posted April 8, 2009 (edited) And that has nothing at all to do with how common it is.How common what is? That LDS people think coffee and tea are evil, or that some LDS people have coffee and tea available for guests?Yes, but why not is the question I'm asking.You've lost me; why not what?Because society says so is a perfectly valid answer. I was just wondering why you thought it so different to bring in one item they don't drink and consume it there verses another item they don't drink (for the same reason) and consume it over there.As I said before coffee and tea are a normal staple in regular society, my coffee drinking would not have any effect on the company I'm with. While a person may drink alcohol regularly themselves in their own home or in a bar; it would just be plain rude to bring and drink alcohol among friends who do not normally associate with alcohol in general; especially in their home. Now it would be different if the LDS host offered the alcoholic beverage to the guest; the host has control over the quantity. If a person cannot drink politely amongst their non-alcohol drinking friends they shouldn't drink at all. Maybe, but I'd respect it I certainly wouldn't be offended...Would you be curious to ask why they would be offended with your sparkling cider and cheese?M. Edited April 8, 2009 by Maureen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 8, 2009 Report Share Posted April 8, 2009 How common what is?The usuage of coffee or tea by the population at large. I may have missed what you were trying to say several posts back, it sounded like you were implying I'd find it hard to believe that lots of people drink coffee and tea something that wouldn't be the case even if I thought merely looking at it or smelling it was a mortal sin. *shrug*You've lost me; why not what?You answered the question in the response to the next chunk of qouted text. Thanks, thats what I wanted to know. You may have said it already and just had to speak slowly to get it through to me. Would you be curious to ask why they would be offended with your sparkling cider and cheese?I might, don't honestly know. There answers be it, "We are Cheseians and it is a mortal sin to allow them in our house" at one end of the spectrum (note I'm not saying allowing coffee, tea, alcohol or even a pack of cigerettes in your home is a mortal sin) to "'Cuz." would affect if I thought them silly or not but have no bearing on wether I was offended or honored it... Okay, if they said, "Its because we honestly truly hate you and know of your love of cheese and sparkling cider and are thus attempting to discourage you from comming over." I'd probably be offended, still honor it though*.* Not saying you wouldn't honor it, please, please, please don't take it that way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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