shining_stars Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 hello. I hope this is not a too long story.. I thought that may be you all could give me some advice on this issue. Here's a little background information. some months ago I was debating with myself of what to do, I did something wrong and it needed to be confessed to my bishop, and I knew it but I tried to justify myself and found a bunch of exuses no to do it, including some of my friends telling me i didnt have to. it was something related to the Law of Chastity.. after trying to make myself think that I didnt have to, i knew in my heart and I felt I had to do it, I just thought that it was too embarrassing to do it. I had repented and "forsaken the sin. so i just neede this final step. My boyfriend wasnt LDS but some months ago he converted and I still felt that something was wrong. well to make this story a little less longer , after praying I received the confirmation to go to my bishop and so I did, I confessed about it, he didn´´t ask for any details, I thought he was going to be very shocked or disappointed but if he was he didnt show it, he even told me that we all make mistakes and that he thought that I repented, he told me not to take the sacraments, not give public prayers, etc (now he reduced the "punishment only not to take sacraments) ( I wasnt disfellowshipped though) I have to go see him ever week to talk about how im feeling. He told me that I might be able to go to the temple next trip which is next month, although he told me the sin was consider very serious, I m confused, and this is the problem, Im repented but I dont feel that I had made rstitution or done enough to pay what i did.. its not that i want to be ex'd or smthing but I feel this way..its a weird feeling, I feel as if I needed to confess something else, cause I think my bishop thought that it happened only once but actually was a lot of times and for more than a year. I assume he thinks that way cause he said something like that... but I dont think i have to say this cause he didnt ask... the question is what should I do to know that Im in the right path.that our HF has forgiven me or will. I felt relieved after confession but then I became confused... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bytor2112 Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 (edited) This is just my opinion, but I think the adversary wants to make us frightened to repent and doesn't want us to feel like we are forgiven or can be....... that our efforts are not sufficient. When we acknowledge that we have sinned to our Bishop, we are doing exactly what the Savior wants us to do. I believe that Bishops probe deeper when they feel led by the Spirit to do so....they want to insure that you have truly turned away from the sin. My Bishop wept with me when I confessed my sins and I am certain that I didn't tell him every instance of serious sin that I committed or every detail. If you feel like you want to talk with him some more about your past....do so. He isn't going to change his mind about you, he will likely feel that you are further along the road of repentance than he first thought. Remember, the Church doesn't forgive sin....only the Lord does that and HE knows your heart and what you were trying to convey to your Bishop. Sometimes it's difficult to express exactly what you want, the Spirit is usually very strong during confession. Oh, and don't forget to forgive yourself .......because the Lord will forgive and forget about it if you forsake it.Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. Edited June 22, 2009 by bytor2112 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 Talk to your Bishop about your feelings. About your confusion. Perhaps he can give you the comfort you need that all is well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lestertheemt Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 I wish I could remember what G.A. said the following, "repentance is the first emotion we feel when we are drawn closer to our Heavenly Father." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeUpton Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 (edited) If there's ever a question of whether to confess more or clarify, it can be a difficult thing to clarify, as well as confess (I've made my own mistakes) it is always wise to just bring it up, clarify it, just tell him, hey, this wasnt just once that it happened. Aside from that, remember that that after we our forgiven by the church and the Lord, often one of the most difficult things in life we need to do is simply this: forgiving ourselves. Bytor was right, this is an important step. One night on my mission I lay in bed with a heavy heart, but could not understand what it was that was bothering me. The prompting came that even after all of the repentance I had done for my "colorful" teen years, I had somehow never forgiven myself, but i ought to. I prayed to Heavenly Father, asking him to give me strength and power to do this thing, because it was so difficult for me. I felt his Spirit rushing in, I felt a great relief come over me as I finally forgave myself that night. Edited June 23, 2009 by MikeUpton Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 (edited) This is just my opinion, but I think the adversary wants to make us frightened to repent and doesn't want us to feel like we are forgiven or can be....... that our efforts are not sufficient. When we acknowledge that we have sinned to our Bishop, we are doing exactly what the Savior wants us to do. I believe that Bishops probe deeper when they feel led by the Spirit to do so....they want to insure that you have truly turned away from the sin. My Bishop wept with me when I confessed my sins and I am certain that I didn't tell him every instance of serious sin that I committed or every detail. If you feel like you want to talk with him some more about your past....do so. He isn't going to change his mind about you; he will likely feel that you are further along the road of repentance than he first thought. Remember, the Church doesn't forgive sin....only the Lord does that and HE knows your heart and what you were trying to convey to your Bishop. Sometimes it's difficult to express exactly what you want, the Spirit is usually very strong during confession. Oh, and don't forget to forgive yourself .......because the Lord will forgive and forget about it if you forsake it.Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. Adding to what is already presented, weeping is part of a sincere and honest confession, and reveals the inner-spirit of ones who wishes to make a greater change with mortal life. Taking from my own prospective, I have been in a few instances when listening to the confession; I would weep. At that very moment, the Spirit has made it known on what to do with this member and receiving the Lords answer. When the member feels the Holy Ghost’s confirmation, I could see the tears fill the eyes and we both feel the immensity of the Saviors love. It is sacred moment for both of us and experience is eternal. Let me state this again, a Bishop or Stake President can lift the burden. But only the Savior and hand picked few chosen ones, who are sealed by the Savior, can further seek the release of the sin through the Spirit. They will not do anything that is contradictory before GOD. Even the Prophet Joseph Smith had this special power.If the Lord forgave it, then it should never be remember, with exception of aiding another by the Spirit. Edited June 22, 2009 by Hemidakota Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 In order to afflict you with spiritual paralysis, Satan will use your fears and insecurities to play both sides against the middle. First he tries to convince you that you've already fully repented. Once you recognize that lie, he'll try to bog you down by telling you you haven't repented enough. That's why the Bishop's role is so important--he isn't emotionally involved in your sin, and so he can listen objectively to the whisperings of the Spirit and receive revelation for you when your own doubts and fears keep you from doing so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 I've heard from more than one Bishop, that a problem some truly repentent people have, is being able to forgive themselves. They avail themselves of the atoning sacrifice of Christ and have their sins washed away, and say to themselves, "But that didn't even hurt! How can I be forgiven?" Something to keep in mind: A parent's job is to raise healthy, smart, capable, moral, good children. When a kid messes up and not only is sorry, but actually punishes herself (or wants to), how much dancing in the streets would a loving parent want to do over this good kid? Now, if they can just find a way to help that thick-headed stubborn rebellious kid, they could say they had a good day. Yeah, loving parents are pushovers for remorseful kids. I think that might be a trait we get from our Heavenly Father. Something to consider. LM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanh Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 While I was in the MTC, one of the Apostles addressed us (can’t recall for sure who at that moment, would have to dig through an old journal) and spoke about ensuring that sins are completely confessed. He told a story of when he was a boy riding a bicycle down a gravel road. I can’t recall the circumstances that lead to the crash, buy he ended up going over the handlebars and landing on the gravel road. When he landed, his thumb was pulled backwards, and the skin between the thumb and forefinger was ripped open. When at the emergency room, he found that the cleaning of the wound was VERY painful, and he resisted. The Dr. gave him a choice – we can scrub out all of the dirt and fine gravel particles now while the wound is open, or we can stop with what we have done so far, and stitch it up. However, the Dr. warned him that were they to stop cleaning now and stitch it up, the likelihood was very high that either an infection would set in, or one of the pieces of foreign matter would become an irritant. If that happened, they would have to perform surgery to cut the hand open, cut out the problems, thereby restarting the entire healing process. The Dr. asked him if he wanted to go through more pain right now, once, or risk going thorough greater pains, scarring, and tissue damage later on. He chose to have the full cleaning. And he likened that to our repentance processes, and how important it is to fully disclose everything upfront when the issue is still open and can be fully cleaned. It can be quite painful to reopen the issue later a second time. If you have doubt that you fully confessed your sin, it will haunt you again and again in life. I know, I've been there. It's no fun to reopen old sins in an attempt to scrub them clean the second time. But it was necessary to feel comfortable and whole. Know that your Bishop loves you. He is there to help you, not make you feel bad for what you have done, or to feel bad that there might be more to tell him about that you didn’t tell him the first time. He can help you feel better. Obviously, I would urge you to see him again. You are obviously a very strong and courageous young woman. It took a lot to see him that first time. I’m confident you are strong enough to do it again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deals_dog Posted June 23, 2009 Report Share Posted June 23, 2009 You need to make another appointment with Bishop and tell him the truth, be honest. Then you'll feel much better. I believe then you will feel a lot more comfortable about yourself and the healing will begin. Then forgive yourself and move on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted June 23, 2009 Report Share Posted June 23, 2009 Not really...the question to the OP, did you receive a confirmation from the Holy Ghost? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glow_inthe_dark_girl Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 · Hidden Hidden Not really...the question to the OP, did you receive a confirmation from the Holy Ghost?Im not really sure ... I'm still waiting for it.. Link to comment
shining_stars Posted June 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 23, 2009 Not really...the question to the OP, did you receive a confirmation from the Holy Ghost?i'm not really sure. I'm still waiting for it.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted June 24, 2009 Report Share Posted June 24, 2009 I am a convert, and I bring this up ONLY because i have a thing about beating myself up.......I'm a bit of a perfectionist, you see, and that's what we do, and prior to becoming LDS, i had a LOT to beat myself up about. Trust in your Bishop, and do as he says. If you feel so moved as to tell him more (and i think that he probably knows this was not a one time thing), then you should do so, and THEN do waht he says........just DON'T continue to beat yourself up over it, that is the advesary working..........sometimes, forgiving oneself can be very difficult........try giving it a shot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted June 24, 2009 Report Share Posted June 24, 2009 P.S.........LOVE your sneakers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Dorsey Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 the question is what should I do to know that Im in the right path.that our HF has forgiven me or will.I felt relieved after confession but then I became confused... A great Priesthood leader once taught me a very important lesson as I was struggling with something I had done wrong. I went to my Bishop and confessed a grevious sin from way in my past, a sin that was devouring my spirit. I cried like a bay when I finally confessed....after talking with the Bishop he said the words that healed me, "the Lord loves me and forgives me" and he said "the Lord will forgive who he wants to forgive but it is up to us to forgive all.....including ourselves." That was the hardest thing I had to do in the repentence process...forgive myself. It took weeks for me to do that, but when I had finally realised that the Lord "remembered it no more" I was free! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 (edited) "the Lord loves me and forgives me"Now that is an interesting statement. A Bishop has the power given to him to remove the burden but not the sin. Only the Lord and those that are called by either GOD or the Savior, are able to remove the sin through the Son. Just curious....you never know who you meet in the church holds certain vested authority from on high. :) Edited July 2, 2009 by Hemidakota Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moksha Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 Back when, people used hair shirts and small whips to flagellate themselves between confessions. Now all you have to do is watch Dr. Phil for the same pain. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honor Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 In a conversation I had with my bishop, I had a similar feeling so I said to him, "I don't want to be sharing details or information that you really don't need or want to hear, but I just want to make sure that I'm being honest and that I'm repenting properly, are you sure that you don't need to know more about this?" And he confirmed that he didn't need to know anything else about this specific situation. I agree with the previous posts - Satan's tools are fear and discouragement. If you have questions, ask them, but be willing to accept the repentance for yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted July 2, 2009 Report Share Posted July 2, 2009 Back when, people used hair shirts and small whips to flagellate themselves between confessions. Now all you have to do is watch Dr. Phil for the same pain.:)Who is Dr Phil? Phil who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.