Humble people love compliments -- T/F?

[prisonchaplain]

Somebody paid me a nice compliment today, and I have to admit I enjoyed receiving it.  Then I wondered if I was not being prideful to take such delight in praise.  I thought some more.  No, maybe it is a sign of humility to feel pleasant surprise at kudos.  What say you?

BTW, part of making this string fun might be to extend praise to another member of the site. I'll start with TRAVELER. He always makes me think hard. Further, I discern he does the same to fellow members.  His angle of thought is never that which is typical or common.

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

I think one can be humble and enjoy praise.  To me, pride is when you compare yourself to someone else (either positively or negatively).  Being humble means only concerning yourself with what God thinks, and striving to do His will rather than your own.

I want to compliment you, PC (twice in one day, lucky you!).  You bring thought provoking questions and discussions and you are unfailingly respectful to others even in disagreements.  

[NeuroTypical]

We all want to love and be loved, and there isn't anything wrong with that.  Some of us struggle with codependency or self esteem issues or whatnot, and aren't quite the picture of health when it comes to needing praise.  I'm not convinced there's really much wrong with that either, at least not in a thread like this.  Basically, here's some praise, and if it triggers your baggage, that's your problem. 

Vort has cool perspectives I usually value.
LP is one of the more interesting folks on the internet I know.  Cool experiences, cool perspectives.
Unixknight is fun to argue with, although less so since I found his hobby of making cool cosplay armor.
PC rocks because he's learned how to be himself and thrive around Mormons.
Beefche rocks because she bears heavy loads and yet is still here.
Pam's sense of humor earns points in my book.

The only reason I stopped there was because I have to leave for a meeting.  Now someone say something nice about me, before I burst into tears! 

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

NeuroTypical, I look forward to your posts, you are very insightful.

And thanks, you made my day!

[Sunday21]

That parakeet person is very insightful

Gator is witty

Vort is wise

Paleridder is clever

Pam has hidden depths

 

[Guest]

I believe it depends on the type of praise.  I don't have a final answer on where the line is, but I'll start with what Orson Scott Card said through his character Ender.

"It doesn't make sense to take credit for an ability you're born with.  But what you do with those abilities, you can take credit for."  Of course, in a gospel sense, we always give credit to God.

But I always found it dishonest to not accept praise for something that was true and good.  But I can still do it in a classy and humble way.  I tell my daughter that she's the prettiest girl in the world.  She doesn't deny it.  She just reminds me that her mom is prettier.  I don't argue that point.

Edited February 24, 2016 by Guest

[prisonchaplain]

This may be a compliment or something else--but Vort gets kudos because I am nearly always in agreement.  :-) 

[Vort]

11 minutes ago, prisonchaplain said:

This may be a compliment or something else--but Vort gets kudos because I am nearly always in agreement.  :-) 

Yay us!

[slamjet]

Depends... I've worked in theater and events since a teenager and was trained to do the job then consider myself lucky to get a "thank you"  at the end of the gig.  Stage crew and tech folks don't have fragile ego's like actors.  I get really uncomfortable whenever I get thanked publicly, especially when they over-do it.  If that happens, I'll ask them to let me do the job then after it's done, shake my hand and say thank you.  That's all I need. 

But some just won't do that I guess because of some ingrained something that if one does not get a ton of praise and thanks, one becomes offended.  Best to keep those who need tons of praise away from me, because I don't play that.

[Just_A_Guy]

Don't know if I can claim humility; but I am an introvert and for what it's worth--I like having been complemented, but the experience of actually receiving the complement is extremely uncomfortable to me.

I like reading about the newfangled technological setups that Slamjet comes up with for his church calling.

[Vort]

21 hours ago, NeuroTypical said:

Now someone say something nice about me, before I burst into tears! 

If I started saying what I like about people, it would take much longer than I have, and I would be sure to miss someone. But I can't let NeuroTypical burst into tears.

NT (erstwhile LM) was one of the first people I communicated with as a new member on this forum eight or nine or however many years ago. I remember taking offense at something or other that he said -- I don't remember for sure what it was, maybe he was making a joke and it sailed over my head -- and expressing that offense in what I fear became an early trademark offensive manner. NT/LM's response was to apologize for giving offense, even though I later saw that he had said nothing offensive. It was all in my own mind. From that point ever since, he is among those whose example I have tried to emulate in my effort to better my interactions here (and elsewhere).

[beefche]

38 minutes ago, Vort said:

If I started saying what I like about people, it would take much longer than I have, and I would be sure to miss someone. But I can't let NeuroTypical burst into tears.

NT (erstwhile LM) was one of the first people I communicated with as a new member on this forum eight or nine or however many years ago. I remember taking offense at something or other that he said -- I don't remember for sure what it was, maybe he was making a joke and it sailed over my head -- and expressing that offense in what I fear became an early trademark offensive manner. NT/LM's response was to apologize for giving offense, even though I later saw that he had said nothing offensive. It was all in my own mind. From that point ever since, he is among those whose example I have tried to emulate in my effort to better my interactions here (and elsewhere).

Wow, is NT actually Pahoran? 

[The Folk Prophet]

9 minutes ago, beefche said:

Wow, is NT actually Pahoran? 

Does that make Vort Captain Moroni?

[Guest]

Well, I'm feeling so much love here that I gotta send a shout out to a bunch of people here.

#1: Pam and Heather for doing all the hard work they do for the forum.  Pam has set up a pretty good community here.  She may not post nearly as much as others, but her spirit is felt in the background.  And I believe she is the underlying reason I like this forum so much.  Even when I disagree with Pam, I still agree with her.  

#2: Gator never fails to lift my spirits.  Maybe it's just his avatar.  Just looking at it makes me smile.  Gator, could you change your avatar for a couple weeks so I can see if it is you or your avatar?  Kidding.  Your avatar may be like your beard.

#3: Anatess is beginning to frustrate me because just as I'm about to post something, I see her posting exactly what I was going to say but more eloquently.  (curses under breath for sideways compliment).

#4: JAG: I have never seen any post from you that was not well thought out and well articulated.  Even if I may disagree with the point, I still can't help but respect what you've posted.

#5: PC: You're a welcome breath of fresh air.  You have successfully navigated a pool of Mormon (yes, I said it) Apologists and have politely worked in discussions about the differences (and similarities) between our faiths.  I've noticed that you also bring up more controversial topics in a manner that is not argumentative, but seemingly born out of a true curiosity.  And you've been able to do so without offense.

#6: Mordor: I'm not sure if you're human.  Your posts are so logical and well researched that I find it difficult to think of your posts as anything other than textbook.  If you're not human, are you some kind of robot?  If so, what powers do you have?  Do you use them for good or for awesome?  Do you have any weaponry like Cyborg?

#7: NT: Sometimes you seem almost like a clone of myself.  So how can I help but liking you? <secretly wonders if NT considers that a compliment or insult>

#8: FP & Vort: As the reigning debate kings, you always liven the discussion.  It makes it fun to be here.  Thank you.

#9: LP: You are a welcome friend.  And I appreciate all your insights you've offered on this forum.

#10: LeSellers: I love you, Dad.  You're my favorite Father-in-law.

Many others.  No time.  But I have to add one more...

#11: Guest:  Thank you for coming by from time to time.  Your posts are so varied in their background and perspectives.  I appreciate your words and spirit that you bring here.

Edited February 25, 2016 by Guest

[NeuroTypical]

17 hours ago, Vort said:

II remember taking offense at something or other that he said -- I don't remember for sure what it was, maybe he was making a joke and it sailed over my head -- and expressing that offense in what I fear became an early trademark offensive manner. NT/LM's response was to apologize

Oh wow.  I don't remember the details either, but I think I remember the exchange.  I remember two things - first, I was grateful to find someone online who didn't appreciate the finer points of wordsmithing passive-aggressiveness.  In other words, I was glad to find someone blunt who would actually speak their mind instead of hinting or hiding behind words or getting hurt.    

Second, I remember I was deep into my exploration of what it means to give and take offense, and it had dawned on me that probably most of the world's problems could be avoided if people just flat out refused to be hurt/wounded/upset/offended by what they THINK the other person was trying to convey.  That, and to just apologize for coming across in ways you didn't intend.  Anyway, I was trying out these methods online - mostly with the well-versed anti-mormons over on some countercult message board, but also whenever someone told me I had offended them.  

Huh.  Genuine apologies - even if you are only apologizing for coming across in certain ways - maybe there's something to that.

 

[Guest MormonGator]

2 hours ago, Carborendum said:

Well, I'm feeling so much love here that I gotta send a shout out to a bunch of people here.

#1: Pam and Heather for doing all the hard work they do for the forum.  Pam has set up a pretty good community here.  She may not post nearly as much as others, but her spirit is felt in the background.  And I believe she is the underlying reason I like this forum so much.  Even when I disagree with Pam, I still agree with her.  

#2: Gator never fails to lift my spirits.  Maybe it's just his avatar.  Just looking at it makes me smile.  Gator, could you change your avatar for a couple weeks so I can see if it is you or your avatar?  Kidding.  Your avatar may be like your beard.

#3: Anatess is beginning to frustrate me because just as I'm about to post something, I see her posting exactly what I was going to say but more eloquently.  (curses under breath for sideways compliment).

#4: JAG: I have never seen any post from you that was not well thought out and well articulated.  Even if I may disagree with the point, I still can't help but respect what you've posted.

#5: PC: You're a welcome breath of fresh air.  You have successfully navigated a pool of Mormon (yes, I said it) Apologists and have politely worked in discussions about the differences (and similarities) between our faiths.  I've noticed that you also bring up more controversial topics in a manner that is not argumentative, but seemingly born out of a true curiosity.  And you've been able to do so without offense.

#6: Mordor: I'm not sure if you're human.  Your posts are so logical and well researched that I find it difficult to think of your posts as anything other than textbook.  If you're not human, are you some kind of robot?  If so, what powers do you have?  Do you use them for good or for awesome?  Do you have any weaponry like Cyborg?

#7: NT: Sometimes you seem almost like a clone of myself.  So how can I help but liking you? <secretly wonders if NT considers that a compliment or insult>

#8: FP & Vort: As the reigning debate kings, you always liven the discussion.  It makes it fun to be here.  Thank you.

#9: LP: You are a welcome friend.  And I appreciate all your insights you've offered on this forum.

#10: LeSellers: I love you, Dad.  You're my favorite Father-in-law.

Many others.  No time.  But I have to add one more...

#11: Guest:  Thank you for coming by from time to time.  Your posts are so varied in their background and perspectives.  I appreciate your words and spirit that you bring here.

Carb, you never fail to make me think when we disagree and you never get nasty or use name calling. I admire you so much for that. 

 

Everyone else: Nothing but love. You all are amazing. 

[The Folk Prophet]

Why does this feel a bit like the seminary testimony meeting where all the cool kids get up and tell each other how cool they are?

[unixknight]

I have a close friend who I game with a lot, and he's very humble, but is awful at taking compliments.  For example, we sat down to play a couple battles in Medieval II:Total War at our annual Nerdfest New Year's party and he kept saying how he'd probably lose, how I'd probably beat him easily.  Now, this guy is an AMAZING gamer.  He picks up a game for the first time and can beat someone who's been playing it for years, so I know he was just trying to be humble.

Well, as expected, he kicked my butt right up between my shoulder blades in two battles.  Fun games though, and I complimented him on his victories.  His response:  Thanks, but I dunno I don't think I did that well."  Now, I get that he's being humble, and I respect that, but reading between the lines shows he's unintentionally being a bit insulting.  He didn't do very well, and yet wiped me off the battlefield nevertheless?  There is such a thing as being too humble, dude.  

Accept compliments graciously.  Goodness knows this world offers few enough of them.

[NeuroTypical]

1 hour ago, The Folk Prophet said:

Why does this feel a bit like the seminary testimony meeting where all the cool kids get up and tell each other how cool they are?

Full disclosure - I've always hated these sorts of threads, probably because I've never actually been in one.  It's like valentine's day for single folks - I've had my share of those too.  This time I shamelessly trolled for compliments, just to see what would happen.  Gotta say I'm pretty much the textbook example of a humble person loving the comments.  

Humble.  Me.  Yep - all the way baby!

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

The Folk Prophet has great tenacity.  Some people may call it stubbornness, but when you are in a pinch, and a tenacious person is on your side, you appreciate this quality so much more.  (I know because my husband is also tenacious/stubborn.)  I think Brigham Young was also very tenacious...and that quality was very useful in moving the Saints west.

There TFP...you are officially one of the Seminary Cool Kids!  Your turn to compliment someone...  

[NeedleinA]

Okay fine...some compliments, thanks to...

Nicki Minaj - for reminding me how classy my wife is.
Dr. Seuss - for making sure I always had ham with my green eggs each morning
The Rock - for helping me not feel so bad about going bald
Mike Rowe - for opening my eyes to the blessings of having a "clean job"
Captain Crunch - for cutting my mouth as a kid and helping me avoid sugary cereals
Rambo - for giving me a fake name to order fast food under. "Rambo, your order is ready".
George Lucas - for turning my kids into nerds, thus avoiding any potential sexual sin until they are married
Mild Taco Bell Sauce - for helping me give off the appearance of being exotic and living dangerously

 

 

[The Folk Prophet]

1 hour ago, LiterateParakeet said:

The Folk Prophet has great tenacity.  Some people may call it stubbornness, but when you are in a pinch, and a tenacious person is on your side, you appreciate this quality so much more.  (I know because my husband is also tenacious/stubborn.)  I think Brigham Young was also very tenacious...and that quality was very useful in moving the Saints west.

There TFP...you are officially one of the Seminary Cool Kids!  Your turn to compliment someone...  

My compliment is that I'm stubborn?

Trust me...I was not one of the cool kids.

[The Folk Prophet]

1 hour ago, NeedleinA said:

George Lucas - for turning my kids into nerds, thus avoiding any potential sexual sin until they are married

Haha. Awesome.

[NeuroTypical]

1 hour ago, NeedleinA said:

thanks to...
Rambo - for giving me a fake name to order fast food under. "Rambo, your order is ready".
 

[NeedleinA]

Yep, you hit it dead on NT...ha...ha...ha, laughing out loud at work now! thanks!

I honestly always use Rambo as my name to order food with, usually followed up with "I'm hard of hearing, so can you say my name real loud for me please!"

Edited February 25, 2016 by NeedleinA