The most hilarious joke Vort ever heard

[NeuroTypical]

[Vort]

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'll have an H₂0." The second says, "I'll have an H₂0₂."

The waiter leaves, then brings them back their orders. The first chemist drinks his water. The second chemist puts his dentures in the hydrogen peroxide and says to his colleague, "I should have been a dentist."

Moral: Metajokes may not always be funny, but we love them just the same.

Sister Vort's favorite knock-knock metajoke:

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Impatient cow.

Impati-

MOOOOOO.

My favorite knock-knock metajoke:

Hey, ya wanna hear a funny knock-knock joke?

Sure.

Great. Start out a knock-knock joke.

Okay. Knock, knock.

Who's there?

...uh....

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[Guest MormonGator]

21 minutes ago, Vort said:

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'll have an H₂0." The second says, "I'll have an H₂0₂."

The waiter leaves, then brings them back their orders. The first chemist drinks his water. The second chemist puts his dentures in the hydrogen peroxide and says to his colleague, "I should have been a dentist."

Moral: Metajokes may not always be funny, but we love them just the same.

Sister Vort's favorite knock-knock metajoke:

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Impatient cow.

Impati-

MOOOOOO.

My favorite knock-knock metajoke:

Hey, ya wanna hear a funny knock-knock joke?

Sure.

Great. Start out a knock-knock joke.

Okay. Knock, knock.

Who's there?

...uh....

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Your stand up career never really took off, did it Vort? 

(Just playing. I am ashamed and humiliated to say I laughed at both your jokes) 

[Vort]

6 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

I am ashamed and humiliated to say I laughed at both your jokes

You should be ashamed and humiliated. There were three jokes.

[Guest MormonGator]

5 minutes ago, Vort said:

You should be ashamed and humiliated. There were three jokes.

Yeah, that was my way of saying one of them wasn't really one you should open with. 

[Vort]

6 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

Yeah, that was my way of saying one of them wasn't really one you should open with. 

The first was designed to be self-referential, not funny. So I must agree.

[Guest MormonGator]

6 minutes ago, Vort said:

The first was designed to be self-referential, not funny. So I must agree.

Eh, I didn't read them anyway. I was just being polite. Figured you needed an ego boost. After all, with jokes like that something is clearly wrong in your life. 

Edited November 4, 2016 by MormonGator

[Vort]

10 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

After all, with jokes like that something is clearly wrong in your life.

LOL at the singular "something".

[Traveler]

With all this fun going on - I was recently in Hawaii and there is a highway called H2O1  - While we are on strange roadside signs; the County garbage transfer station in Utah County (Utah of course) has interior speed limit signs of "13 3/4" Miles Per Hour????  I think these signs are hilarious my wife thinks they are stupid.  But then I think engineers are the world’s smartest people – my wife thinks engineers are stupid.  I think she is biased because she is married to an engineer.

 

The Traveler

[NeuroTypical]

[Vort]

For my undergrad zoology degree, I could either help a faculty member to determine the DNA sequence of white rat mitochondria, or else work with a guy who would rent me a couple of cotton beetles to investigate their life cycle. I chose the lessor of two weevils.

[NeuroTypical]

Gravy, what have I done...

[Traveler]

 

Do you know what you end up with if you put 25 female pigs in a fenced area with 25 male dear?

Answer – you end up with “50 sows and bucks”.  But you may have to say this (inside the quotation marks) out laude in order to understand why engineers think this is accounting (investment) humor. 

 

The Traveler

[NeuroTypical]

[Guest]

On 11/4/2016 at 12:54 PM, NeuroTypical said:

I resemble that remark.

[NeuroTypical]

Continuing the theme:  Hey DEI people - are you aware the mental health folks are launching an assault on your acronym?

[Traveler]

 

@Vort – you ought to enjoy this.  A photon was going on a trip and was checking in at the airport when he was asked if he had any luggage.   “No” he said, “I’m traveling light”.

 

The Traveler

[NeuroTypical]