zil Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Did you know that in the Nauvoo temple they were originally considering using angels in the baptistery instead of oxen? They decided to go with a sans seraph font. eddified, dprh, Sunday21 and 4 others 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 (edited) Thanks, Dad. EDIT: Honestly, I'm going to look for an excuse to use this today. Edited December 7, 2016 by Vort eddified and zil 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anatess2 Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Do you know why the Prophet banned coffee and tea? Because, the Bible says He-brews but they couldn't stand to be in the kitchen. askandanswer and Sunday21 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Are lame fake lyrics allowed here? Vort, Jamie123, dprh and 3 others 5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 1 hour ago, Vort said: EDIT: Honestly, I'm going to look for an excuse to use this today. The longer you think about it, the stupider and funnier it gets. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 47 minutes ago, anatess2 said: Do you know why the Prophet banned coffee and tea? Because, the Bible says He-brews but they couldn't stand to be in the kitchen. I think this lost something in the translation... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 It does depend on at least a rudimentary understanding of French, but that's reasonable. zil 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 6 minutes ago, Vort said: It does depend on at least a rudimentary understanding of French, but that's reasonable. I think people are more likely to recognize "sans serif" than they are "seraph" (esp. without the "im"). Could be wrong. Either way, they might not get it. Still funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 15 minutes ago, zil said: I think people are more likely to recognize "sans serif" than they are "seraph" (esp. without the "im"). Could be wrong. Either way, they might not get it. Still funny. True story: I got into a discussion about what type of font to use. The manager kept saying he wanted a "sans serif" type font. So, I kept suggesting Arial. He kept trying to correct me,"No, I said a sans-serif type font." Eventually I realized he didn't know what that meant. I had to 'splain it to him. Then we agreed on Times Roman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 So, Ghandi walked barefoot or in sandals. He got weaker due to his fasting. And had bad breath due to the Indian cuisine. He became known as : The Super-calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 5 minutes ago, Carborendum said: So, Ghandi walked barefoot or in sandals. He got weaker due to his fasting. And had bad breath due to the Indian cuisine. He became known as : The Super-calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis. groooooaaaaaan Jeremy A 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 How do you kill an elephant? With an elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? You hold its trunk until it turns blue. Then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a yellow elephant? You tell it a really embarrassing joke until it turns red. Then you hold its trunk until it turns blue. Then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Who ever heard of a purple elephant? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? Plums are purple. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants stampeding? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when she saw the elephants stampeding? Here come the plums! She was color blind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Elephant jokes are: Awesome Unidirectional Both of the above unixknight and Sunday21 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Is it too late for me to delete this topic? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Just now, zil said: Is it too late for me to delete this topic? You're just lucky I stopped at two elephant jokes. I haven't even started the Dad jokes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Godless Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 I got these blocks for my son. He plays with them periodically. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Hydrogen and thorium are in the same group. Awesome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anatess2 Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? You open the door, shove the elephant in, close the door. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, close the door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anatess2 Posted December 7, 2016 Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 Moses was getting ready to close the ark when he noticed one animal was missing his pair. Which animal was it? The giraffe. It's in the refrigerator. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted December 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2016 We're really, really good at lame jokes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted December 8, 2016 Report Share Posted December 8, 2016 5 hours ago, Carborendum said: What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? Plums are purple. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants stampeding? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when she saw the elephants stampeding? Here come the plums! She was color blind. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants stampeding while wearing sunglasses? Nothing. He didn't recognize them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted December 8, 2016 Report Share Posted December 8, 2016 9 hours ago, NeuroTypical said: Are lame fake lyrics allowed here? David was a king who married lots of women. Then he saw Bathsheba while she was a'swimmin'. David thought Bathsheba's looks were pretty swell. So he killed her husband, And now he's in -- heck. Vort, NeuroTypical and Sunday21 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 8, 2016 Report Share Posted December 8, 2016 (edited) 13 hours ago, Godless said: I got these blocks for my son. He plays with them periodically. Argon has the wrong atomic number. What the? I didn't know they had given Flerovium a name. Sweet. Edited December 8, 2016 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anatess2 Posted December 8, 2016 Report Share Posted December 8, 2016 4 hours ago, Carborendum said: Argon has the wrong atomic number. What the? I didn't know they had given Flerovium a name. Sweet. Uhm... that wasn't funny. SilentOne 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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