HereAmISendMe Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 So here's a question: my wife passed away a few months ago and I am engaged to a younger woman, with whom I am going to the Temple. Here's the issue: when I do that, I will be sealed to two women. I don't want to leave my first wife out in the cold, so to speak, nor do I wish to deny my fiancee an eternal marriage. Quote
Just_A_Guy Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 Welcome! At the risk of being overly pedantic, I would note that you have not explicitly posed any question here. Vort 1 Quote
Jane_Doe Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 Howdy! You & your fiancé have the option of being 1) being seal in the temple, or 2) you can also have just a civil marriage in the temple. Both are valid options, up to you and your fiancé to pray & talk about. I know people who have taken both routes. Quote
HereAmISendMe Posted October 13, 2018 Author Report Posted October 13, 2018 19 minutes ago, Just_A_Guy said: Welcome! At the risk of being overly pedantic, I would note that you have not explicitly posed any question here. Fair enough. I see that now. The question is: will getting sealed to my fiancee tear me apart from my first wife? She made me promise to move on after she passed, but we never discussed the whole two wives thing, i.e. how she'd feel about it? Quote
HereAmISendMe Posted October 13, 2018 Author Report Posted October 13, 2018 1 minute ago, Jane_Doe said: Howdy! You & your fiancé have the option of being 1) being seal in the temple, or 2) you can also have just a civil marriage in the temple. Both are valid options, up to you and your fiancé to pray & talk about. I know people who have taken both routes. And in the case of option #2, then my fiancee would have the opportunity to meet someone (not sure how that works, TBH) and be sealed at that point? Quote
Just_A_Guy Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 (edited) 6 minutes ago, HereAmISendMe said: Fair enough. I see that now. The question is: will getting sealed to my fiancee tear me apart from my first wife? She made me promise to move on after she passed, but we never discussed the whole two wives thing, i.e. how she'd feel about it? I should think that would be primarily a matter of personalities. I suppose the best approach would be to take it to the Lord like any other question. Presumably He wouldn’t tell you to go forward with a temple sealing if it were contrary to the plan He had for you and your deceased wife. Edited October 13, 2018 by Just_A_Guy Vort, HereAmISendMe, Daybreak79 and 3 others 6 Quote
Jane_Doe Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 (edited) 6 minutes ago, HereAmISendMe said: And in the case of option #2, then my fiancee would have the opportunity to meet someone (not sure how that works, TBH) and be sealed at that point? Haha, honestly we don't really understand much about the eternities or eternal families. It just gives people options. The time I've most commonly seen it done is when it's a older widower and widow having a companionship marriage just for time. My grandpa always refers to my deceased grandma as "my eternal companion", but was married to a widow in the DC temple for time as well. She in turn refers to her deceased husband as "my eternal companion". That arrangement was simply what they desired. Edited October 13, 2018 by Jane_Doe Sunday21 1 Quote
HereAmISendMe Posted October 13, 2018 Author Report Posted October 13, 2018 2 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said: Haha, honestly we don't really understand much about the eternities or eternal families. It just gives people options. The time I've most commonly seen it done is when it's a older widower and widow having a companionship marriage just for time. My grandpa always refers to my deceased grandma as "my eternal companion", but was married to a widow in the DC temple for time as well. She in turn refers to her deceased husband as "my eternal companion". Yes, I will always consider my deceased wife to be my EC, but I love my fiancee. I'm her first husband, so it's not as if she has an EC waiting for her. JAG hit the nail on the head: it's a prayerful contemplation in the Temple type thing. Jane_Doe and Daybreak79 2 Quote
Jane_Doe Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 Just now, HereAmISendMe said: Yes, I will always consider my deceased wife to be my EC, but I love my fiancee. I'm her first husband, so it's not as if she has an EC waiting for her. JAG hit the nail on the head: it's a prayerful contemplation in the Temple type thing. Totally! Best of wishes and prayers for you and your family! HereAmISendMe 1 Quote
NeuroTypical Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 1 hour ago, HereAmISendMe said: ...my wife passed away a few months ago and I am engaged to a younger woman... Honestly, that phrase sort of has me unable to focus on your actual question... zil 1 Quote
Fether Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 29 minutes ago, NeuroTypical said: Honestly, that phrase sort of has me unable to focus on your actual question... Why? Quote
zil Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 (edited) 1 hour ago, Fether said: Why? Can you imagine getting engaged within a few months of your wife's death? Most people require years to recover from the loss of a spouse. (3-5 years being the average.) Edited October 13, 2018 by zil Fether 1 Quote
Iggy Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 Dallin H. Oakes married & is sealed to both women. So, yes, you can be sealed to your bride-to-be. You will have to make arrangements to do so in the temple, talk with your Bishop and make sure your bride to be has received her endowment before hand. No, it won't leave wife #1 out in the *cold*, BUT it is my understanding that during the millennium, if she doesn't agree to have the 2nd wife in your family unit, then wife #1's wishes will be honored. Daybreak79 1 Quote
Guest MormonGator Posted October 13, 2018 Report Posted October 13, 2018 (edited) 6 minutes ago, Iggy said: if she doesn't agree to have the 2nd wife in your family unit, then wife #1's wishes will be honored. I'd love to be a fly on the wall for some of those conversations. Edited October 13, 2018 by MormonGator Quote
Just_A_Guy Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 1 hour ago, zil said: Can you imagine getting engaged within a few months of your wife's death? Most people require years to recover from the loss of a spouse. (3-5 years being the average.) For some reason, this often doesn’t seem to be the case in the Church. Then-elders Nelson and Oaks each remarried within two years of their first wives’ deaths. Daybreak79 1 Quote
zil Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 1 minute ago, Just_A_Guy said: For some reason, this often doesn’t seem to be the case in the Church. Then-elders Nelson and Oaks each remarried within two years of their first wives’ deaths. 2 years is still different from a few months. I'm not saying anyone's wrong, per se, just that it's a bit surprising. Someone else can worry about right and wrong in this case. Quote
Guest MormonGator Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 @zil, you aren't one to judge the marital status of anyone else. Remember your life down in the compound young lady! 😉 Quote
Just_A_Guy Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 Just now, MormonGator said: @zil, you aren't one to judge the marital status of anyone else. Remember your life down in the compound young lady! 😉 Ooh, that sounded creepy. @zil, do you need help? #escape zil 1 Quote
Guest MormonGator Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 (edited) 1 minute ago, Just_A_Guy said: Ooh, that sounded creepy. @zil, do you need help? #escape Escape? Who do you think sits in the tower with an M40 making sure that isn't possible? Hint-It ain't me or @LadyGator Edited October 14, 2018 by MormonGator Quote
zil Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 1 minute ago, Just_A_Guy said: #escape Who do you think reloads Gator's ammo? (Typed before I saw Gator's reply ) Quote
Guest MormonGator Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 3 minutes ago, zil said: Who do you think reloads Gator's ammo? (Typed before I saw Gator's reply ) It's alright, we have to keep up with appearances. Add a few more sharks to the moat please while I'm thinking of it. Quote
zil Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 1 minute ago, MormonGator said: Add a few more sharks to the moat please while I'm thinking of it. Hmm, shark vs gators. I'm going to have to call around to whoever it was that made Sharknado first - we might could make a profit off this. Quote
LadyGator Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 9 minutes ago, MormonGator said: Escape? Who do you think sits in the tower with an M40 making sure that isn't possible? Hint-It ain't me or @LadyGator No, @LadyGator works on the underground escape tunnels though. How is that @Just_A_Guy? zil and mordorbund 2 Quote
Lost Boy Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 The goal in life is a celestial marriage. To become like God. God is a being of infinite love. This includes both husband and wife. You goal is to become beings of infinite love. I could hardly imagine a first wife being selfish and still being considered a being of infinite love. I might be wrong here, but my guess is that celestial love is going to be a bit different than you see on Earth. Do you even have sex in the eternities? Quote
JohnsonJones Posted October 14, 2018 Report Posted October 14, 2018 @zil @MormonGator @LadyGator Sometimes the discussions here get rather bizarre. Sunday21 and Iggy 1 1 Quote
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.