Jane_Doe

Sounds like you're doing it right Bini.

Do what floats your boat. You're going to church, that's what's matter. Note: home wards are assigned so you can support your neighbors. This is not applicable while visiting, so it doesn't matter.

I don't like using the term "liberal" vs "conservative" because a person does not have to be one or the other. For instance, I loathe "liberal" ObamaCare, but am very pro "liberal" environmentalism. Is there any particular area that's coming up with your relatives?

In the words of Edna Mode: pull yourself together!!... fight, win!! Really, pull yourself together!! I say that to be encouraging: get out there! Show them who you are and go for it! Take it from someone who spent years moping about never finding the "one", I learned a couple of things: 1) The "one" doesn't exist. 2) If you confine yourself to dating a person with characteristics "xyz", you're limiting your potential and the possibilities God has in store for you. 3) Finding love is a lot like building a rocket: patience leads to joy out of this world, impatience leads to explosive fireworks on the launch bay. Don't rush it. 4) Feeling sorry for yourself is the best great quicksand pit in the world.

We had a similar instance in my ward today: girl ~6 was in the stands baring her testimony about baptism "wiping the germs away". She told mommy she want to go up to the stand and then promptly got shy (mom told us the story).

Thank you!

As I’m thinking about this, I recall a story from General Conference*. The speaker told of when he went to ordain a new temple president and matron in a third world country. The speaker recalled how impressed he was with the simple and pure faith of the new temple matron. But she was embarrassed to have an apostle of the Lord see her! Why? Because she could not read and came from very humble circumstances (hence one can guess she never read the BoM herself). But none of that mattered!! Her faith was pure and she was beloved daughter of God!!! And now she was in a position to help so many other children of God with her pure and simple faith. * I think it was told by Pres. Uchtdorf(?). Admittedly I’m foggy on the details, and would love it if someone could help me narrow it down.

I hear you there, likewise history has never big a hang-up for me. Rather the tripping point for me was… smiles. People just kept smiling like robots, whether or not they were actually happy!! I’m a huge proponent in being an authentic person, and I’m NOT going to fake being happy or believing something I don’t. We all have doubts on something. For me a theological constant study point is the post-mortal life-- I don’t think its so simple as the cartoon diagram we show investigators. It’s a big topic, and I find that swallowing the whole theological elephant doesn’t work well. Instead, I (try) to go through each segmented idea and evaluate it on it’s own merits. It’s a lot more work than the approach “I prayed about the BoM so everything must be true”, but it’s how I feel comfortable doing things. Don’t let people rush you on your faith. Take things how you’re comfortable. As to whether or not you can know the Gospel is true without reading the BoM, I would say totally! You can know the Jesus is your savior without ever touching a BoM. Now, can you know if the BoM is true without reading it… that’s more questionable. But the Gospel is so much more than reading just the one book (yeah I know that comment will likely get me scolded, but it is how I feel). The Gospel is Christ, the Father, the love of God, the love of fellow men, prayer, etc- acceptable to everyone whether or not they are even capable of reading the BoM.

Pa Pa, usually I'm the first one to jump at the chance to explain the faith and share spiritual experiences with non-members (including hearing their experiences). However, if a person's not wanting to listen, not wanting to share, and just wants to bash.... you're not going to get anywhere when someone's heart is that closed.

Part of the purpose of the sacrament is to renew baptismal convents, is it not? Like being re-baptized every week. Except that it's much easier to carry two dozen cups than two dozen tubs :).

Ditto to what Bini said. If your husband is willing to discuss some of his concerns, then doing so will probably be a good idea. A lot of the arguments against the church can be unraveled with rational discussion and/or faith. For example, the "no archeology" argument is easily counter (at least for me). If your husband is unwilling to discuss things, trying to force the issue is a bad idea. Again, ditto to Bini's advice. As to your motivations: I don't think a desire to be social is a bad thing. After all, God made us and wants us to help each other. However, social-ness shouldn't be your only motivation because the church is much more than a club. Examine yourself: if you want to be back in church to have a relationship with Christ then you're good.

Things which are unavoidable (non-exclusive list): Death Taxes Sorrow Pain Grief Trials Questions Questions about faith Challenges to one's faith I think it's fair to say that challenges to one's faith are inevitable: even Jesus was tempted and wished not to drink of the bitter cup. I also think that it's prideful folly to say "oh, I couldn't possibly have my faith challenged or have doubts".

When you're talking to someone you don't know, it might be useful to mention you teach comparative religions. Speaking personally, I run across a lot more people who are 'educated' on Mormonism because of some anti-propoganda site than people who are studying Mormonism because they are professors.

Thank you LaraPar

Umm... why were we trying to separate intellect from emotion? I won't want to convert to the church because of just intellect or just emotion: you should gibe you WHOLE self to God. If your faith is shaken, it doesn't just effect your intellect, it effects your whole self.

Have you asked your husband what about baptism makes him so uncomfortable? I couldn't tell you what's bothering him specifically, but I know a lot people whose spouse coverts are afraid that conversion will make their spouse a different person: that one day they'll wake up next to a total stranger. I understand where that fear is coming from: faith is a big part of life and who you are. When that's the case, I recommend to people to take things slow, and to always communicate with your spouse about what's going on spiritually. Communication removes the fear of this new religion being some scary unknown monster, or you turning into a stranger.

Because people make dumb comments they have no right to make (like the above). (I mean no offense Avatar, I just think we have no right to judge the strength of another's faith, especially someone we've never met).

The ground (us) can be transformed from a barren waste to a fertile paradise by the presence of the seed (truth/light/knowledge).

I've found that the speed in which a person into a defensive posture is highly correlated with how often they're thrown rocks at. The online missionaries have a very unique position, in that they only hang out in this universe on anonymity, where tone is so easily misconstrued and trolls reign. I've heard online missionaries estimate that 1/2 of the people that log on are trolls, just wanting to have their laugh at the missionary's precious beliefs. Excluding the trolls, a lot of people log on saying something like "I heard this craziest thing on tabloid.com-- that Mormons can't make it into heaven without magic underwear- is that true?" Being an online missionary is a tough gig. One of the ways online missionaries filter out those that want to learn from those that just want to mock is to ask you to to put forth a little effort, usually in the form of reading a paragraph. If a person wants to learn, reading a paragraph and talking about it is no big deal, right? But trolls don't read, they just want to mock and not put any effort forth themselves. I'm not saying any of this to excuse this online-missionary-- she was rude and asking you to read the entire Book of Mormon is rather ridiculous for a first time encounter. I just find that understanding where a person is coming from helps in the forgiveness process. I'm sorry you had such a bad experience. Not all the online missionaries are like that (they have diverse personalities just like everyone else). And missionaries are not super advanced theologians or apologists: they're 18-20 yo kids out trying to shine forth their child-like faith of the Savior. Mormon theology does have layers, just like Protestant Christian theology. Mormonism 101 starts with defining sin and the need of the Savior-- you want a person to realize that they need Christ (cause they do). Stuff like eternal increase is totally not Mormonism 101, and hence missionaries (i.e. specialists in Mormonism 101) don't really go in it. And Dorian, if you have an questions you can also ask us too.

Faith is giving your heart, mind, and soul to God. Have that shaken rocks the *very core* of who you are as a person.

I think that TFP's point is that nurturing faith is a choice. I don't think his point is judging those who don't make that choice.

I refer to the parable of the sower: seeds which are planted in bare ground or in weeds are more likely to be snuffed out. This is just a fact. However, this does not remove agency. TFP, do you know what in nature makes a patch of land fertile? What transforms barren rock into lush fertile soil? It is the plants themselves: they break up the harsh ground, bring nutrients, and literally transform sunlight into the marvelous world around us. It doesn't take much: in the high mountains you can find entire forests which were founded because one little seedling made it through those first harsh winters. (Sorry, for the dorky reference, I'm a botanist in real life and see the work of God so manifest in nature)

I think in many ways shaken-faith-sydrome resembles depression. There are many causes and it can happen to anyone. Usually it starts with something in your world falling apart, bringing on great sadness and confusion. You get angry, stomp your foot, and demand to know "why". You feel victimized- how could this happen to me? How did I get here? Why didn't I see this earlier? Who's fault is it? How dare this situation betray me!? I feel so hurt... so alone... Coming out of shaken-faith-sydrome resembles coming out of depression. You have to admit it's there, to quit denying that your foundation has been cracked. Don't try to navigate out of the fog solo: seek help from friends, family, counselors in that area, and of course the Lord. You need to re-find your center, and build up from there. Frequently we must admit that we had unrealistic expectations in some areas/people/ourselves. Because of this re-viewing and re-learning are critical parts of re-building. For both depression and shaken-faith, this re-growth is something which cannot be rushed, anymore than a toddler's first steps.

Happy to help! Have you seen the FAQ section on the church official website? I'd check it out. http://www.mormon.org/faq There's no harm in asking them. If you step on something too sensitive or stick your-foot-in-your-mouth, you're friends will tell you (is that was friends are for?)

I second this. And *hugs* Bini.