How to tell whether or not you are becoming inactive

[estradling75]

What does the word Active and Inactive mean in this context?  It is a church term.  It is designed to indication "Activity Level IN The CHURCH"  Thus it is a measurement of external ACTIONS a member is taking.  By every metric you have given us  @Lee you are inactive.  If you disagree then name one external Church activity that you are engaging in. (Not the private and personal stuff)

Now it is also commonly used as a short cut for indicating those that have lost faith/testimony, this is not always true.  However it is often a good guess because faith and testimony require constant feeding (of small and simple things) or they fade away.  Now a person can keep their faith and testimony fed away from the church and indeed some people have to... But it is much harder.  The Lord knows this.  This is why as part of the Baptismal Covenant we are to "Meet together Oft" and part of the Temple Covenant to Consecrate our time and talents to the work of the Church.

So it is natural that Church members who see another member going inactive to be concerned about where said person will end up.  Because there are too many scriptural reference to things like being "lukewarm", "Wheat and the Tares" and even "Wise and Foolish Virgins" to even think that someone being inactive is a good idea in any sense.

[Overwatch]

On 7/4/2018 at 6:15 PM, Lee said:

My wife and I were talking and she told me that we need to be more active now because she thinks that once the baby is born she can see us becoming inactive. I tried to claim I was very active but my wife pointed out lots of things that made me realise we may not be doing too good spiritually. Do you think these are signs of becoming inactive: 

- We haven't paid a full tithe since being married 

- We never wear our garments except to church and to the temple

- We haven't been to the temple in 5 years except for 2 family weddings and we live 30 minutes away from one

- I deny every calling I am given (my wife doesn't but she doesn't enjoy them) 

- I never bother to watch general conference 

- I still haven't heard a single thing Prophet Nelson has said since becoming the Prophet 

- We have attended one ward event in the last 2 years 

- We have never had a family home evening since being married 

- We only attend church on alternate weeks now (due to circumstances out of our control) 

- When I attend church I often skip out after the sacrament meeting 

 

But I still feel like I have a desire for the gospel and we haven't broken the word of wisdom intentionally during our marriage. So I don't think we are at risk of becoming inactive because we want to keep our covenants. Do you have any advice on how we can make sure we stay active?

Hey Lee

Well you are inactive for sure. You didn't post what you are doing wrong (if anything) I mean besides your lying, mostly just posted what you are not doing. If this is all of it then all of these have an easy remedy; just do them. Not really much else to say. Not sure if you are planning on changing or even why you asked everyone and posted your personal life on the web (if this is genuine) 

Lee if you are willing to lie to the bishop then you definitely will lie to us my friend. You seem to want to change, so change... really that simple.

Anyway, we all love you. Have a great week.

Edited July 8, 2018 by Overwatch

[Lee]

2 hours ago, Overwatch said:

Hey Lee

Well you are inactive for sure. You didn't post what you are doing wrong (if anything) I mean besides your lying, mostly just posted what you are not doing. If this is all of it then all of these have an easy remedy; just do them. Not really much else to say. Not sure if you are planning on changing or even why you asked everyone and posted your personal life on the web (if this is genuine) 

Lee if you are willing to lie to the bishop then you definitely will lie to us my friend. You seem to want to change, so change... really that simple.

Anyway, we all love you. Have a great week.

Because I don't care no one knows me, my name isn't even Lee  

And I don't lie to the bishop outright it is more of a half truth I tell him. If only life was as easy as just do it... 

Edited July 8, 2018 by Lee

[Lee]

Im not dumb I know I should do those things. I guess I was asking for someone to convince me to do them or to tell me I was at risk of becoming inactive. 

[estradling75]

13 minutes ago, Lee said:

Im not dumb I know I should do those things. I guess I was asking for someone to convince me to do them or to tell me I was at risk of becoming inactive. 

You are inactive... You are at risk of losing your Faith and testimony as you stop doing the things that feed them and keep them strong

[Fether]

41 minutes ago, Lee said:

Im not dumb I know I should do those things. I guess I was asking for someone to convince me to do them or to tell me I was at risk of becoming inactive. 

What do you consider inactive???

If you don’t think you are inactive now, please tell me what are you active in doing? Scripture study,  Temple attendance, attending meetings, praying, family history, FHE, ministering (assigned and none assigned), callings, family prayer and study.

I ask not to judge but to try and open your eyes. It seems the only “activity” you are active in is calling yourself a latter-day saint.

From what we have seen... you aren’t at risk of being inactive, you ARE inactive. Start doing the things God, scriptures and prophets tell us to do. Read  EVERY day, Pray morning afternoon and evening both by yourself and with your family, attend ALL your church meetings, attend the temple regularily, pay your tithing, study the words of the prophets, do your ministering assignments, magnifybyour calling and priesthood.

That is how you become active

Edited July 8, 2018 by Fether

[Fether]

1 hour ago, Lee said:

And I don't lie to the bishop outright it is more of a half truth I tell him. If only life was as easy as just do it... 

Half truths are lies Lee! 

And these simple gospel commandments are as easy as “just do it”

Things I do every day:

- Read scriptures (Im actually rewriting every verse as I go right now)

- Read the Book “Power of Habits”

- Read the Book “Miracle of forgiveness” 

- Listen to talks or podcasts

- Pray at least 5 times (personal and family)

- Write in my journal

 

things I do every week:

- Attend the temole

- family history work 

- attend all my church meetings

- fulfill my calling to the fullest

- Have family home evening

 

And all this along with working full time to provide for my family (my wife stays at home to take care of our kid). And after all this, I still find time to have every meal with my family, watch movies, play games with my wife and friends and play like 10 hours of video games a week  

It is all about where our priorities are. If I can do all these things, you  can insert a few of them into your life. You just have to remove any preoccupations you may have. Whether that be phone, video games, movies, internet, gym, books, or sleep. 

We all have 24 hours in a day. Cut out 8 for sleep and that gives us all 16 hours to do whatever the heck we want. Make time for the gospel

Edited July 8, 2018 by Fether

[Guest MormonGator]

2 hours ago, Lee said:

Because I don't care no one knows me, my name isn't even Lee  

And I don't lie to the bishop outright it is more of a half truth I tell him. If only life was as easy as just do it... 

Life isn't easy @Lee, no one here will tell you otherwise. Just know that we are all praying for you and we all want the best for you! 

[Chilean]

21 hours ago, Lee said:

Because I don't care no one knows me, my name isn't even Lee  

And I don't lie to the bishop outright it is more of a half truth I tell him. If only life was as easy as just do it... 

hahahaha I'm sorry Lee, but I seriously just laughed out loud at your "I don't lie to the bishop outright it is more of a half truth I tell him". THAT is a lie. Lying is like the Gospel, you do it, or you don't, white or black, there is no grays in lying, LOL

Dude, wake up!!! And start doing the things you know you have to do. You came online to look for validation, we understand what you are saying, and based on the information you shared we gave you our opinions, you might not like them, but ... pretty much we all agree, you are going inactive.

Go call your bishop and talk to him, he is the judge in Israel assigned to your ward, he can help you receive revelation. Follow the counsel of President Nelson, and learn to receive revelation for you and your family.

 

[Lee]

Well at this point I realise that it easier to just walk away from the gospel but I'm not willing to do that so judge all you want

[Guest MormonGator]

9 minutes ago, Lee said:

Well at this point I realise that it easier to just walk away from the gospel but I'm not willing to do that so judge all you want

My friend, don't worry about people judging you. It's between you, your family, and God. I apologize if we came across too strong. 

[Chilean]

14 hours ago, Lee said:

Well at this point I realise that it easier to just walk away from the gospel but I'm not willing to do that so judge all you want

 

It’s true, isn’t it? Then what else matters?

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2007/04/its-true-isn-t-it-then-what-else-matters?lang=eng

 

 

 

[Lee]

It is just that they are always people judging me who think it wrong for me to be semi committed to the church. They think it better if I don't go at all. 

[zil]

21 minutes ago, Lee said:

They think it better if I don't go at all. 

They are wrong about that!  If your personal best is semi-committed, then do your personal best - hopefully while working to improve your personal best.

[Lee]

On 7/8/2018 at 4:20 AM, VelvetShadow said:

A lot of people stay in various religious groups and participate in things they do not believe in anymore for the sake of their marriage.  I can understand your point of view and your reasons for doing this.

Im not doing that

[Lee]

2 hours ago, zil said:

They are wrong about that!  If your personal best is semi-committed, then do your personal best - hopefully while working to improve your personal best.

But they act like I shouldn't be taking the sacrament. Apparently, you're either all in or all out 

[zil]

1 minute ago, Lee said:

But they act like I shouldn't be taking the sacrament.

Only you, the Lord, and your bishop (if he knows the truth or is inspired in spite of not knowing it) have any right to judge this.  Anyone could make generic statements about general principles (though they should stick to quoting scripture and modern prophets), but no one else has the right to make that judgement about you.

[mrmarklin]

On 7/4/2018 at 4:15 PM, Lee said:

My wife and I were talking and she told me that we need to be more active now because she thinks that once the baby is born she can see us becoming inactive. I tried to claim I was very active but my wife pointed out lots of things that made me realise we may not be doing too good spiritually. Do you think these are signs of becoming inactive: 

- We haven't paid a full tithe since being married 

- We never wear our garments except to church and to the temple

- We haven't been to the temple in 5 years except for 2 family weddings and we live 30 minutes away from one

- I deny every calling I am given (my wife doesn't but she doesn't enjoy them) 

- I never bother to watch general conference 

- I still haven't heard a single thing Prophet Nelson has said since becoming the Prophet 

- We have attended one ward event in the last 2 years 

- We have never had a family home evening since being married 

- We only attend church on alternate weeks now (due to circumstances out of our control) 

- When I attend church I often skip out after the sacrament meeting 

 

But I still feel like I have a desire for the gospel and we haven't broken the word of wisdom intentionally during our marriage. So I don't think we are at risk of becoming inactive because we want to keep our covenants. Do you have any advice on how we can make sure we stay active?

You are active by the Church’s own definition. 

Dont let the naysayers of this forum discourage you. Your activity will increase gradually as you start taking your children to their classes. The very fact that you are trying is enough. The idea that you are becoming unworthy is from Satan. 

 

You are making progress , keep the faith. 

[Lee]

6 hours ago, mrmarklin said:

 

You are making progress , keep the faith. 

Its one of those things I'm not sure where to start.

[VelvetShadow]

11 hours ago, Lee said:

Im not doing that

I didn't mean to insult you at all, I only meant I can understand why you are not being 100% honest about tithing so you can keep your temple recommend and therefore, keep your wife happy and not put any unnecessary strain on your marriage.  I meant no offence at all, Im sorry if I said the wrong thing

Edited July 11, 2018 by VelvetShadow

[mordorbund]

On 7/9/2018 at 6:59 PM, Lee said:

Well at this point I realise that it easier to just walk away from the gospel but I'm not willing to do that so judge all you want

If you're feeling judged in this thread, please remember that your OP was asking for judgment.

If you're feeling judged at church, my experience has been that most people are too busy taking care of their own families to examine the room and see who takes the sacrament and who doesn't. That's not to say they don't care if you don't attend your meetings. I wouldn't be surprised if the elders quorum presidency has counciled together on how they can better serve you.

[mrmarklin]

6 hours ago, VelvetShadow said:

I didn't mean to insult you at all, I only meant I can understand why you are not being 100% honest about tithing so you can keep your temple recommend and therefore, keep your wife happy and not put any unnecessary strain on your marriage.  I meant no offence at all, Im sorry if I said the wrong thing

In my experience so many people fib about tithing it's almost the norm.  I do tax returns. 

I don't do a lot of Mormons, but most of the ones that I do don't do 10%.  But that's MY definition.  There may be a lot of mitigating circumstances in their lives I know nothing about.  Some do over 10%.  Of course this is a very super small sample size.

 

Remember the Church is for the sick (sinners).  And they killed the last Perfect Man.

Edited July 11, 2018 by mrmarklin

[Lee]

6 hours ago, mordorbund said:

If you're feeling judged in this thread, please remember that your OP was asking for judgment.

If you're feeling judged at church, my experience has been that most people are too busy taking care of their own families to examine the room and see who takes the sacrament and who doesn't. That's not to say they don't care if you don't attend your meetings. I wouldn't be surprised if the elders quorum presidency has counciled together on how they can better serve you.

mhm

[Lee]

18 hours ago, mrmarklin said:

You are active by the Church’s own definition. 

Dont let the naysayers of this forum discourage you. Your activity will increase gradually as you start taking your children to their classes. The very fact that you are trying is enough. The idea that you are becoming unworthy is from Satan. 

 

You are making progress , keep the faith. 

Thank you bro