Oh, man.

[Vort]

I bought The Worst Thesaurus Ever yesterday. It's terrible. It's also terrible. So I bought another one, but all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe my anger. So I bought a dictionary to help me out, but someone ripped out pages at the front and back. It went from bad to worse.

[Vort]

I went to a friend's funeral last week. A man asked my friend's French widow if he could say a word, and she gave the okay. So he stood up and said, "Plethora." The widow said, "Thank you. That means a lot."

Another man also asked to say a word. He stood and said, "Bargain." My friend's widow said, "Thank you. That means a great deal."

A third man also asked to say a word. He stood and said, "Monde." She replied, "Thank you so much. That means the world to me."

[mordorbund]

 

[Jamie123]

The Dictionary is a wonderful book. I admit it doesn't have much of a plot, but all the words are explained as you go along.

[Carborendum]

I bought an audio version of the dictionary.  It's high definition.

Only one word is spelled "incorrectly" in the dictionary.

My neighbor the librarian attacked me with a dictionary.  The judge didn't know whether to charge him with verbal or physical assault.

I once had a military dictionary with a camouflage cover.  I can't find the words.

My family never bought me a dictionary for my birthday.  I have no words to express my disappointment.

The most offensive page in the dictionary is disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.

I decided to read the dictionary.  By the time I got to "case," I was past caring.

[Carborendum]

The first rule of thesaurus club is: You do not talk, speak, communicate, orate, or converse about the thesaurus club.

I used to be poor until I discovered a thesaurus.  Now I'm penurious.

[askandanswer]

19 hours ago, Carborendum said:

Only one word is spelled "incorrectly" in the dictionary.

And is that word color?

[Jedi_Nephite]

My uncle once said that if you read the dictionary, you’ll know the meaning of life.

[Carborendum]

On 2/24/2023 at 6:57 AM, askandanswer said:

And is that word color?

I see you're coming around.

[askandanswer]

On 2/24/2023 at 2:41 AM, Carborendum said:

Only one word is spelled "incorrectly" in the dictionary.

 

On 2/24/2023 at 10:27 PM, askandanswer said:

And is that word color?

 

20 hours ago, Carborendum said:

I see you're coming around.

"Color" is why it is incorrect.

[Carborendum]

2 hours ago, askandanswer said:

"Color" is why it is incorrect.

You see, "color" is a different word than "incorrect."  Is this another thing they have upside-down in the down-undah?

[pam]

On 2/26/2023 at 7:25 PM, Jedi_Nephite said:

My uncle once said that if you read the dictionary, you’ll know the meaning of life.

I thought that was 42.  

[Carborendum]

36 minutes ago, pam said:

I thought that was 42.  

No, that's just the answer, not the meaning.