Are You A Closet Communist?

[JojoBag]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

 

 

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you've got a problem.  I went to various communist web sites and socialist organizations and made up these questions based on the content of those sites.  Every one of these questions is about force, the same as Satan's plan.  He wanted to require everyone to do the right things without giving anyone free agency to choose for themselves. 

[Bini]

I'd be interested to know who doesn't have a problem.

[The Folk Prophet]

In case anyone wasn't sure -- no. I am not. But I'll answer as honestly as I can for the fun of it.

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

 

No.

 

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

 

No.

 

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

 

Meh. I'm not against some control there...but too much is problematic.

 

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

 

I'm not sure. Certainly there should be requirements if so that one is seeking to find a job or has legitimate reasons to not have one, and I'd have to think through it more carefully by way of consideration of other potential solutions. For the most part, I think any sort of government handouts self-perpetuates the overall problem. At an individual level, people get into trouble and unemployment can be a great help.

 

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

 

Well, that's three questions. Partially. Partially. And partially.

 

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

 

No one is truly free. Social contracts are imperative and they do limit some freedom, and always will. The problem is how much. Democracy and the like limit less freedoms than others.

 

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

 

I don't know. Un-researched.

 

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

 

I must admit I'm torn on this. This may be my one true nod to potentially socialistic thinking. But I admit that another part of me things that sounds like a good way to kill progress in the medical world.

 

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

 

I don't know enough about it.

 

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

 

No.

 

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

 

No.

 

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

 

No.

 

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

 

Sounds dangerous. There is some appeal there I suppose, but it sounds more likely to kill the economy, jobs, and move companies towards automation instead of manpower for everything they can.

[The Folk Prophet]

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you've got a problem.  I went to various communist web sites and socialist organizations and made up these questions based on the content of those sites.  Every one of these questions is about force, the same as Satan's plan.  He wanted to require everyone to do the right things without giving anyone free agency to choose for themselves. 

 

Incidentally, there is no evidence that Satan's plan was force.

[Palerider]

Last time I looked I wasn't a closet communist.

[prisonchaplain]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

Okay, but wow does this feel like a set of loaded questions, and the kind of test that very few will come out smelling good on. 

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

 

If preventing companies from pouring poison into public waters, or spewing excessive contaminants into the public air is communistic, then I suppose I am.  Ironically, no Democrat would consider me anything but pro-business.

 

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

 

I'm opposed to gay marriage, but banning state-level Jim Crow laws turned out to be a right call.  I suppose in the 1960s I'd have been communistic, though today Democrats would call me a bigot.

 

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

 

No.  (I'm 1:3 so far!  )

 

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

 

The status quo seems to be working okay.  Remember that we pay for unemployment insurance, so it's not exactly the same as welfare.  Time limits tend to motivate job seekers though.

 

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

 

Roads, highways and bridges--for sure.  Affordable housing--I can see using tax incentives to encourage, and perhaps even subsidize builders to do low-price projects.

 

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

 

We're a republic, and have a fair amount of representative democracy.  The question seems loaded.  You answer yes, and then get nailed for missing some unspoken issue or perspective.

 

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

 

No.

 

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

 

I'd like to go back to before Obamacare.  My opposition to government control is we'll end up paying to kill babies.

 

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

 

I'm gonna answer passive-aggressive on this one--I don't think we should disband Social Security, now that we've had it for nearly 3 generations.

 

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

 

Government should do more to encourage private, charitable giving, and should offer a Spartan Welfare program.  The question of how the aid should be distributed does not seem like a foundational issue to me.

 

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school.

 

No. However, Equal Access laws--guaranteeing religious groups the same access and rights as all others, seems more important to me.

 

 

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

 

This question is loaded, without context, and has little to do with Communism.  There are very devout Psychologists and Psychiatrist.  Some even integrate their faith into their practice.

 

BTW, if I wanted to pick up the tact of these questions, I might insinuate that a negative response here indicates the respondent is a closet Scientologist, since that religion opposes Psychiatry. 

 

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

 

No!

 

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you've got a problem.  I went to various communist web sites and socialist organizations and made up these questions based on the content of those sites.  Every one of these questions is about force, the same as Satan's plan.  He wanted to require everyone to do the right things without giving anyone free agency to choose for themselves. 

 

Correlation is not causation.  This questionnaire has most moderate conservatives "failing," and then implies satanic inspiration.  Yikes. 

[kapikui]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

 

In general no, but there may be limited cases where severe damage (particularly to local environment) may need to take precedence over a company's profits. One local example is a fertilizer plant that pumps out a lot of sulfur products.  Many of these turn to sulfuric acid on contact with water. I doubt it does long term damage, but when there is a temperature inversion in the valley here, it can become quite painful to breathe.   Other examples include intelligent management of shared resources like forests.  

 

That said if someone buys a lot of land legitimately and decides to clear cut it that's his business. 

 

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

The idea that any government even could come within a country mile of doing this successfully is so laughably moronic as to defy belief to me. 

 

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

In general, no, however there may be exceptions.  I think the workers should be empowered to make the workplace more worker friendly without government interference either in favor of organized workers (unions) or in favor of the corporations.

 

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

If you do that, most people won't find a job,

 

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

One of the only things I think the government should do is provide infrastructure.  Affordable housing is not the business of the government, and environmental cleanup (EG BP Oil Spill) should be done by whoever made the mess. 

 

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

This country was never meant to be a democracy, and you are only free under democracy if that form of totalitarianism fits you comfortably enough 

 

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

I believe the government should eliminate the food stamp program.  Some form of welfare may be necessary as a short term stop gap for those without family or charity organizations willing to help, particularly those devastated by injury or illness. Help for those with severe mental deficiencies or other disabilities that preclude ever finding gainful employment may be appropriate as well.   (EG acquaintance of mine has had two strokes by before 25 years old.  He has brain damage and will likely never be able to work for much pay). Also any veteran who is disabled due to combat action defending our country gets pretty much a free ride. 

 

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

Health insurance could be fixed by completely privatizing it, deregulating it, allowing health insurance companies to sell across state lines, and by banning group health insurance companies.  This would force every single health insurance company in the United States to compete with every other health insurance company in the United States for every single customer in the united states. Prices would drop rapidly, coverage would increase greatly, and the overall hassle would drop almost instantly.   Any company that didn't fix themselves instantly would have all of its customers leave instantly. 

 

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

Nope.

 

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

Nope.

 

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

Nope.

 

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

Nope

 

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

Nope.

 

 

Now on to your assertion that answering yes to any of these questions is satanic in nature.  You're a little over the top.  

[pam]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

 

 

 

 I certainly would hate to see them do away with it now that I've paid into it for 4 decades.

[Backroads]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you've got a problem. I went to various communist web sites and socialist organizations and made up these questions based on the content of those sites. Every one of these questions is about force, the same as Satan's plan. He wanted to require everyone to do the right things without giving anyone free agency to choose for themselves.

1. Why is the government involved in helping company profits? Government has no place there. I suppose, yes, the government ought to put people first. The whole purpose of a government is to protect people. Loaded question.

2. Of course, but only by ensuring everyone's natural rights.

3. Let the companies take care of themselves.

4. If the people of said government have a way of funding such a benefit.

5. To some extent it's a nice thing.

6. Theoretically.

7. See 4.

8. No.

9. No.

10. No.

11. No. Why does the government care about the ways of individual communities?

12. No

13. No.

But, wow, these are loaded questions. There are better ways to phrase these.

[Guest]

These questions all seem to lean toward the superlative. I never, ever use superlatives. 

[JojoBag]

But, wow, these are loaded questions. There are better ways to phrase these.

 

I agree, but almost all of this is directly from the Communist Party, USA.  I even toned it down a bit.

[Vort]

Wow. I'm a Communist. Whoda thunk?

[Backroads]

I agree, but almost all of this is directly from the Communist Party, USA. I even toned it down a bit.

If you toned them down, there's the problem. Instead of representing communist ideals, you're presenting more vague ideals possibly accepted to an extent by other political ideologies.

[Latter Days Guy]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

YES

2. Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

YES

3. Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

PROBABLY

4. Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

YES

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

YES

6. Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

YES

7. Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

Don't know what food stamps are so will pass on this one.

8. Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

I believe that healthcare should be free at point of contact, which is what we have in the UK

9. Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

YES

10. Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

YES

11. Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

NO

12. Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

YES and NO, depending on what the particular problem is.

13. Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

YES

 

 

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you've got a problem.  I went to various communist web sites and socialist organizations and made up these questions based on the content of those sites.  Every one of these questions is about force, the same as Satan's plan.  He wanted to require everyone to do the right things without giving anyone free agency to choose for themselves. 

Or you live in the UK where the majority of these things already happen and we certainly aren't a communist country!

Edited October 20, 2015 by Latter Days Guy

[Jamie123]

Wow. I'm a Communist. Whoda thunk?

 

Ditto :) Let's hear it comrades...

 

The People's Flag is deepest red,

It shrouded oft our martyred dead,

And ere their limbs grew stiff and cold,

Their hearts' blood dyed its every fold.

 

Now everyone join in with the chorus...

 

To raise the scarlet standard high.

Beneath its folds we'll live and die,

Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer,

We'll keep the red flag flying here!

Edited October 20, 2015 by Jamie123

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

Or you live in the UK where the majority of these things already happen and we certainly aren't a communist country!

 

Phew, I'm glad to hear that since my answers are very similar to yours.  I know I'm not a communist, but for a moment I was confused.  :)  

[Backroads]

Communism: I don't think that word means what some of us think it means.

[Guest]

Answer the following questions to determine if you are a closet communist.

 

1. Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

 

5. Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

A sound NO to most of the questions.

 

1) I believe we need a balance between these.

 

"People".  What does that mean putting them first mean from a government perspective?  

 

Environment BEFORE profits.  I certainly think profits while ignoring environmental effects is bad.  LOADED!!!  

 

Milton Friedman talked about this.  He said it is a valid complaint that if companies in their search for profit cause harm to the environment which in turn causes damage to other people or their property.  But the solution is not in mandating methods or processes or licensing.  "The policy that while still not good, but causes the least harm to freedom, is to limit emissions and nothing else.  All other policies create more problems than they solve."

 

5) Not housing, not environment.  But public works programs -- depends on what aspect.  I don't have a problem with government built & maintained roads for the big roads.  I do have a problem with government controlled roads.  I have a small problem with government run utilities such as water, storm, & sewer.  But from a practical standpoint, I don't know of a good way a private company can run these (including the roads) while still fostering competition.

Edited October 20, 2015 by Guest

[Vort]

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

[Guest]

What I'm getting out of this is that so far, I'm the only non-communist?  And I know people more libertarian than I am.

 

Maybe I don't belong here.

[Guest MormonGator]

What I'm getting out of this is that so far, I'm the only non-communist?  And I know people more libertarian than I am.

 

Maybe I don't belong here.

 You do. Believe me. I'm strongly libertarian. In fact, when I joined the church I told my stake president that, "I'm very vocal about my political beliefs. Is this a problem?" He responded, "No, this isn't about politics, it's about church. We have liberals, conservatives, apolitical and you name it here." 

 

I'm not going to answer the OP's questions. Briefly put, the only immoral act in the market is a loss. The only moral act in the market is a profit. The blunt truth is when you seek your own self interest, you must help others. That's the only way to survive in a free market economy. 

Edited October 20, 2015 by MormonGator

[Guest]

This is for you, Gator.

 

This land is my land.

It isn't your land.

I got a shotgun.

And you don't got one.

You'd better get off,

Or I'll blow your head off.

This land is private property.

 

Cheers.

[Vort]

What I'm getting out of this is that so far, I'm the only non-communist?  And I know people more libertarian than I am.

 

Maybe I don't belong here.

 

Perhaps a better thing to get out of this conversation is that, notwithstanding JoJoBag's sincerity and good intentions, the individual items in his list do not, in fact, describe a communist. Many of these items fit very well under the motivations "establish justice" and "promote the general welfare" as named by the preamble to the US Constitution. Let's walk through the list.

 

Do you believe the government should put people and the environment before profits by companies?

 

Consider the contrary: Do you believe the government should put profits by companies before people and the environment?

 

Absurd. "Environmentalism" has a bad name because the movement has always been infested by those who would happily use it as a pretext to seize power -- which is precisely what we have been seeing for the past two generations. But the corruptness of the movement doesn't mean the idea itself is bad. It isn't. It's obviously good.

 

Do you believe the government should legislate equality and social justice?

 

Or do you rather believe that government should legislate inequality and social injustice?

 

"Equality" is central to traditional American values. The poor man, the wage laborer, and the unpopular should stand in exactly the same esteem before the law as the rich man, the landowner, and the politician. This naive, even laughable, idea is truly at the root of what has traditionally defined America.

 

Some have co-opted the word to mean what I have heard called "equality of outcome". I think of Norman Rockwell's (in)famous "Freedom Froms": Freedom  From Want and Freedom From Fear. We most definitely do NOT want the government seizing on these as its priority items, or making laws in an attempt to legislate away want and fear. But the rejection of the openly socialistic/communistic ideal of outcome equality is not a rejection of equality, any more than the rejection of homosexual "marriage" is a rejection of the institution of marriage.

 

The whole "social justice" question is too loaded to answer. The term itself is warped, and as a knee-jerk reaction, I look askance at any reference to it.

 

Do you believe the government should radically reform for profit companies to make them more worker friendly?

 

This question is far too nebulous and, again, loaded. The history of western democracies, specifically 19th-century Great Britain (think Dickens), shows the excesses that unbridled capitalism can engender. No decent person wants Oliver Twist starving in the streets. Ideally, such things are taken care of by private concerns -- but let's not be blind to reality. In a for-profit economy, most entities can be counted on to act in their own bottom line's best interest. This actually self-limits the system, because it cannot be stable as long as the poor are not taken care of.

 

The conservative's rationale is that caring for the poor is an individual, not a group, responsibility. I admit this has a lot of appeal. But it's nonsense in any realistic implementation. How often do you go out and buy dinner for people on the street? I bought a street guy a hamburger a week ago, but that is hardly a realistic way to feed the hungry.

 

I pay tithing, and I take pleasure in noting how the Church (who receives that tithing) does good works in caring for the poor using those sacred funds. I feel that in some literal way, I am helping care for the poor by giving money to an entity that does the rubber-meets-the-road work of actually feeding and caring for people. I get my warm glow without leaving the comfort of my house. In a similar manner, lots of non-Mormons (and some Mormons) take some pleasure in noting how government programs feed and otherwise care for the poor, using their tax funding.

 

Please note: I am fully aware of the difference between tithing and taxes. They are vastly different things. The work that the Church does in caring for the poor is starkly different in important ways from government welfare doles. But the feeling of vicarious do-gooding is probably not much different, if any. And the idea of a large entity interceding in behalf of a group of people is a reasonable point of contact.

 

Do you believe the government should allow a person to stay on unemployment until he finds a job?

 

Or should the government instead not allow people to stay on unemploymnet until they find a job? Maybe the government should pay unemployment only to those with jobs. This question is defective.

 

The underlying thrust is whether the government should provide unemployment benefits. This is not a cut-and-dried matter, nor are those who believe that this is a good idea necessarily a bunch of communists.

 

Do you believe the government should start public works programs to rebuild infrastructure, provide affordable housing, and clean up the environment?

 

Government is by its very nature a public works program. And government has the duties to "provide for the common defense [and] promote the general welfare," for which purposes our Constitution was ordained and established. Infrastructure is an overwhelmingly important part of that, and I have never been able to swallow the whole "private roads" idea that some push. Remember, it was Ike who built the interstate system. And thank heaven for the environmental protections, without which the US might be another USSR, and our country a collection of unmitigated Aral Sea and Chernobyl-type disasters.

 

Do you believe that you are free under democracy?

 

Is there another system that provides more freedom? (I trust this is not the silly "republic vs. democracy" argument that sometimes gets trotted out, as if it's actually meaningful and relevant to split linguistic hairs in an attempt to establish one's worldview.)

 

Do you believe the government should expand the food stamp program?

 

Well, doesn't…that is, can you…Shouldn't we…

 

Okay, I can't disagree with this one. The US welfare program is a huge mess – invasive, expensive, and inefficient. Wanting to make that area of the government even bigger and more intrusive is an exceptionally bad idea, and does indeed seem like a reflection of the foolishness of the communist mentality.

 

Do you believe the government should institute and control all health care insurance?

 

Loaded.

 

Do you believe the government should have the Social Security program?

 

No. But given that's what FDR established many generations ago, that's what we're stuck with. I've been paying into it my whole life, and I certainly hope to get something out of it. I am in no possible sense a big fan of FDR, but I expect my attitude may be exactly what our grandchildren and great-grandchildren say about Obamacare. We may hate the system, but if we're forced to support it, then we have claim to its (supposed) benefits.

 

Do you believe the government should give out cash welfare payments (AFDC)?

 

No. What a horrible idea.

 

Do you believe the government should outlaw prayer in school?

 

I find the whole "prayer-in-school" thing to be a red herring. People pray in school all the time. It's not illegal. But I'm not sure I want the teacher leading such a prayer. I can just imagine some feminist teacher leading the students in prayer to the Great Maternal Council, begging them for forgiveness from being a boy and strength to fight the evil patriarchy.

 

Prayer in school sounds great to many people, until they or their children are expected to show honor and deference to a god they don't believe in.

 

Do you believe the government should treat behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists/psychologists can understand or treat?

 

This question exemplifies the weakness of the list of questions. It's loaded in every word.

 

(For the record, I agree with the thought that underlies this question. But the question itself is a lie.)

 

Do you believe the government should mandate a high minimum wage?

 

No. But so believing does not make one a communist, which is the point.

[Guest MormonGator]

This is for you, Gator.

 

This land is my land.

It isn't your land.

I got a shotgun.

And you don't got one.

You'd better get off,

Or I'll blow your head off.

This land is private property.

 

Cheers.

 Love it! Thank you my friend, and get off my lawn! 

Edited October 20, 2015 by MormonGator

[Vort]

 

This is for you, Gator.

 

This land is my land.

It isn't your land.

I got a shotgun.

And you don't got one.

You'd better get off,

Or I'll blow your head off.

This land is private property.

 

Cheers.

 

While this is a mildly humorous parody of Woody Guthrie's "This Land Is Your Land," it reflects a violent and Satanic vision of society that I doubt anyone on this list would care to experience. There is certainly nothing in it that reflects the values taught by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.