LadyHanley93 Posted August 16, 2015 Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 (edited) Hello all! So I have a friend who is a hard core Christian and he disapproves of my choice since joining the lds church. In fact he was hoping I would join his church. I rarely talk to him because he feels bitter that I joined the lds church. I made my own descion and I don't regret it Edited August 16, 2015 by LadyHanley93 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted August 16, 2015 Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 I don't see defending the faith as, for the most part, arguing with someone one on one. There is little use in that sort of defending. Bear testimony and leave it at that. Where I do think "defending" the faith that comes by way of debate makes sense is in public forums or other situations where those criticizing or the like are being heard by others who might be swayed by their comments. In these cases, standing up and making a defense makes sense to me. If a friend were texting me critical of the church I would probably, for the most part, ignore it. pkstpaul and hagoth 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyHanley93 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 I don't want to win a arguement I just want to present the facts and leave with that. But you do make a vaild point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted August 16, 2015 Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 Something to consider - I've been defending the faith online for almost 20 years now. I can probably count on one hand, the number of people I've actually made a dent in and changed their mind about something. classylady and Jane_Doe 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 16, 2015 Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 (edited) You need to accept the advice you were given. You will never change the mind of someone. That said, I love to debate and discuss. I do it for two reasons. 1) I'm an egomaniac who loves the sound of his own voice and 2) you may help someone who agrees with you but is too quiet to say it. In fairness, it's usually twenty year old atheists who are convinced they can dazzle you with their Churchillian orations and Aristotelian logic that truly think they can change minds. Most religious apologetics is done more to build someones faith than convince a non believer or someone hostile to the church. Other than that, avoid religious debates unless you are close, personal friends. No good can come from it. Edited August 16, 2015 by MormonGator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyHanley93 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2015 Something to consider - I've been defending the faith online for almost 20 years now. I can probably count on one hand, the number of people I've actually made a dent in and changed their mind about something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyHanley93 Posted August 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) I wish I had a like button on this site for this quote. It becomes very difficult for me to defend my own faith when my friend doesn't have the facts straight. I am not surw if he is just bitter or just wants to start debates. That's why 95 percent of the time I ignore it and move on with my life. I don't mind having friends of other religions it just bothers me that he has false facts about the lds church. Edited August 17, 2015 by LadyHanley93 NeuroTypical 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) . That's why 95 percent of the time I ignore it and move on with my life. I don't mind having friends of other religions it just bothers me that he has false facs about the lds church. Smart move. Do as I say here, not as I do. Don't try to argue your faith, politics, or anything. Life goes much, much easier for you if you just nod your head and say "Oh, I totally agree!" even if you really don't. Edited August 17, 2015 by MormonGator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyHanley93 Posted August 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) The most disturbing thing he has said is Hating something that is false according to quality evidence is a good thing. Didn't Jesus Christ teach us to love and not hate someone of a different religion? Sorry guys but I find this distributing. I was raised Catholic and was taught by my parents to respect other peoples religious pratices. I don't see the point of nit picking at other peoples religious views. Edited August 17, 2015 by LadyHanley93 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane_Doe Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Have you asked your friend if he's willing to sit down and talk about things with you? If he's willing to talk about his concerns and listen to your responses, I'd do that. If he's 100% convinced he's right and your wrong, and just wants to inform you of that, I'd just skip the infomercial and move on with life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 He's not going to budge. It would be a waste of mental and emotional energy to try. I really think that with these kinds of people (who have been taught at church how terrible we are, and how to "argue" with us), it's a matter of casting your pearls before swine. Especially if you're already struggling with your mental health. If it were me, I would probably text something like, "I would really like us to continue to be friends, but I think we're going to have to leave our religious differences out of it. Do you think you can do that?" If his answer- and more importantly his actions- tell you no, it's time to move on. Sometimes people only belong in our lives for a season, and that's okay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Saying you totally agree if you do not is called lying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Alternatively, you could say, "That's something to consider." or, "I might give that some thought." It acknowledges that he's said something without putting you on the hook to either agree or disagree. But I still maintain that you should draw a big boundary line with him, and make religion a forbidden issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hagoth Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 ...If it were me, I would probably text something like, "I would really like us to continue to be friends, but I think we're going to have to leave our religious differences out of it. Do you think you can do that?" If his answer- and more importantly his actions- tell you no, it's time to move on. Sometimes people only belong in our lives for a season, and that's okay. LadyHanley, there is some rock-solid counsel there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Str8Shooter Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 A true friend will always respect your beliefs.Conversion is a change to a different life and sometimes that means we have to change friends too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Times like these, there's only one reply that works... "I love you too". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Saying you totally agree if you do not is called lying. Actually sometimes it's better to nod and say "Yup." instead of fighting with someone. There is a time and place to draw the sword and another time and place to put harmony above it. If we walk around with chips on our shoulder ready to argue and fight at the slightest thing, it makes us all look bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdowis Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) "Let me be frank with you. Each of us has made our decisions about what we believe, and I think you would agree with me that friends should avoid talking about religion and politics. So let's be friends, OK?" Edited August 17, 2015 by cdowis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traveler Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Hello all! So I have a friend who is a hard core Christian and he disapproves of my choice since joining the lds church. In fact he was hoping I would join his church. I rarely talk to him because he feels bitter that I joined the lds church. I made my own descion and I don't regret it My friend from time to time tries to pick fights with me through text message about how I am wrong and I just ignore it. How can defend my faith as an lds? It's not about winning the argument but learning to defend my faith. I know not every Christian in the world is like this. Greetings LadyHanley92: As a scientis and an engineer as well as a long time 5th generation LDS I feel that I can hold my own very well in any religious discussion. However, as some have already posted when one is sewing the seeds of the Gospel - many of the seeds fall on soil on which there will be not enough growth to sustain the seed. I personally feel that if someone is unkind concerning the religious discussions that they should be treated differently than someone that is kind or interested. If you friend is sending jabs - I would respond with something like "When you are willing to act like a Christian perhaps we can have a thoughtful and loving discussion about religion and how the things we believe effect how we treat others." Or the simple line of "no one cares how much you know until they know how much you care." The point being that there can be no discussion with the spirit when one has feeling of contension. Windseeker 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iggy Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 The LDS Church doesn't need us to defend it, it stands on its own. When someone berates you, put you down for your belief, and criticizes your faith - then all you really need to do is Bear Your Testimony. https://www.lds.org/youth/article/how-do-you-bear-a-testimony?lang=eng I had a friend who is a devout Catholic. He delighted in debating over my faith, gospel principles, everything regarding the LDS church. After several years of being brow beaten by him, I gave him a beautifully printed copy of the Articles of Faith, the Proclamation that I framed. A copy of the Book of Mormon, Pearls of Great Price, Doctrine of Covenants, & Stand For Something by Pres. Hinkley. I put the framed copies up on his bedroom wall in between all of the rosaries that he had up there, and then asked him to read the books from cover to cover before he ever talked to me again. After one of my neighbors brutal and nearly unrelenting attacks against my faith - he was *quoting* crap he got off of anti-mormon web sites - I asked him where I should go to get honest information regarding his faith. He quickly wrote down the web sites. NOT one of them was an Anti-Catholic site. So then I wrote down LDS.org, and told him to quit the Anti sites and go to the Official LDS site. Two months later, his toned changed. He no longer baited me into arguments. He respected my adherence to the Word of Wisdom, and his swearing, cussing and negative attitude disappeared. He is still a Catholic - I doubt he will ever change because it is easier for him to go to Mass every Sunday for 30 minutes. Tithe from 3 to 5% of his net income, and collect rosaries to hang on his walls. The LDS church is a much more difficult faith. It is 24/7, we tithe a minimum of 10% of our gross increase, we willingly & happily serve for NO pay in our Wards/Branches, we attend church every Sunday for 3 HOURS. We collect spiritual music, literature, frame-able pictures, etc. We are taught and strongly encouraged to NEVER bash another's religion/faith. So, bear your honest testimony. Ask your Bishop where you can obtain inexpensive copies of the Pear of Great Price, Book of Mormon, Doctrine & Covenants that you can give to this man. Jane_Doe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mirkwood Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 With my +5 Holy Avenger. mordorbund 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyHanley93 Posted August 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) I wish I had a like button for Iggy and Traveler. As a convert of 15 months things are way different for me. I live in Arizona but my high school was about 30 percent LDS. so needless to say I became friends with a lot Mormons in high school. I was a bridesmaids in a couple of temple weddings even though at the time I wasn't LDS. I grew up around the LDS culture before I converted. Let me just say that it makes my blood boil that my hardcore Christian friend thinks I am heathen doomed for hell. A few months ago he attended my ward and started a debate with the elders. Well he messed with the wrong set of elders seeing as they had very good rebuttals for his arguments. Needless to say his face got beat red and he left because he was embarrassed. He did not speak to me for two weeks and since then I have been bombarded with annoying texts. I found out this morning by one our mutual friends he has not spoken to our hardcore Christian friend in a month because my hardcore Christian friend has criticized my friend for being an atheist heathen that moved in with his long time girlfriend and that he will be going to hell. Needless to say my friend no longer wants to be involved with him. So everyone if he insist that he is right and wants to blab that he always going to be right he may choose to do that. His favorite quote is Hating something that is false according to quality evidence is a good thing. So if he wants to have this attitude for the rest of life I cant change him. If he wants to sink so low and critize me and my atheist friend I wont be speaking to him. It is a real low blow to criticize a person because of a different religious background. Edited August 17, 2015 by LadyHanley93 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 The LDS church is a much more difficult faith. It is 24/7, we tithe a minimum of 10% of our gross increase, we willingly & happily serve for NO pay in our Wards/Branches, we attend church every Sunday for 3 HOURS. We collect spiritual music, literature, frame-able pictures, etc. We are taught and strongly encouraged to NEVER bash another's religion/faith. Not to nit pick but if we are going to defend our faith let's at least get it correct. The First Presidency has written: “The simplest statement we know of is the statement of the Lord himself, namely, that the members of the Church should pay ‘one-tenth of all their interest annually,’ which is understood to mean income. No one is justified in making any other statement than this” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdowis Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) my hardcore Christian friend thinks I am heathen doomed for hell. youtube apologetics ==>> "I'm just curious. As an expert on who is going to hell, let me ask you a basic salvation question. Is baptism necessary for salvation? What did Christ say in the Bible."[this refers to Mark 16:16, etc but he will already know that]After a moment of sputtering, just tell him to think about it and to get back with you. I would not use this with your friend, but I find it helpful in some situations. Edited August 17, 2015 by cdowis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iggy Posted August 17, 2015 Report Share Posted August 17, 2015 Not to nit pick >>>snipThen don't. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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