Clearing up misconceptions: The stupidest complaint against Mormonism

[NeuroTypical]

Byron said: "Hearsay: Mormon's believe Lucifer is Jesus' brother.

What is the truth here?"

 

Vort replied: "The truth is that this is, bar none, the single stupidest complaint I have ever heard against Mormonism."

 

Vort, it comes close, but the jury is hardly out.  Here are serious contenders for 'stupidest complaint':

 

* The Book of Mormon mentions coins, and archaeologists haven't found coins, so the BoM is false. 

* "Adieu" is in the BoM, therefore it's false, because Native Americans migrating from the Middle East who wrote in reformed Egyptian didn't speak French.

* I know this one mormon who was an evil jerk, therefore your church is false.

* The only reason for the LDS missionaries, is to bring fresh blood into Utah, because inbreeding is a problem here in the 2000's.

[erog84]

I get where you are going with this, and it is no doubt frustrating.  Personally I get more frustrated with active members who have misconceptions about gospel doctrine.  And if our members have certain misconceptions, it is harder for me to get upset at non-members who have them also.  I don't include ones who are trying to get a rise out of us, or who aren't sincere in their intentions.

[Vort]

That is a good shortlist of stupid complaints. But in my judgment of the sheer stupidity of the statement, "Mormons believe Jesus and Satan are brothers" just stands head and shoulders above the rest.

[Guest]

Mormonism is a farce because the Book of Mormon wasn't translated exactly the way that one illustration depicted. 

[estradling75]

Mormonism is a farce because the Book of Mormon wasn't translated exactly the way that one illustration depicted. 

 

Related to this one...  Because that one time my leader told me something that I later found to be untrue...  Clearly Mormonism is afraid and hiding the "TRUTH!!!!"

[beefche]

Naw, I've got ya'll beat.  I had someone actually believe that Mormons worshipped (their word, not mine) vegetables.  It was in their "file" they had--they were ministers of another faith and had done research on Mormons to show that they are evil and a cult. In their "file" they prove we actually worship veggies.  

 

My friends (who are non-members) were astounded when these friends of theirs said that. They told them, "Um, no. We've had dinner with Beefche and she eats veggies. We've never seen her pray to them or anything like that." My friends were told they were just wrong and didn't know the truth.

[Guest]

Good business investments to protect the church in the future are a LIE. Monson built a mall to line his pockets!

[JojoBag]

I get where you are going with this, and it is no doubt frustrating.  Personally I get more frustrated with active members who have misconceptions about gospel doctrine.  And if our members have certain misconceptions, it is harder for me to get upset at non-members who have them also.  I don't include ones who are trying to get a rise out of us, or who aren't sincere in their intentions.

 

Right on!  

[Just_A_Guy]

My two nominations for stupidest complaint:

 

1.  "Joseph Smith plagiarized the Book of Mormon from the Solomon Spaulding Manuscript . . . What's that?  The manuscript was found and it has absolutely no resemblance to the BoM?  Well, Solomon Spaulding must have written a second manuscript that we haven't found yet!  Yeah, that's what happened!  'Cause Spaulding was from Pittsburgh.  And Sidney Rigdon lived in PIttsburgh before he moved to Ohio.  And Oliver Cowdery traveled through Ohio once and might have encountered Sidney Rigdon there.  And iocaine comes from Australia!"

 

2.  The horns.  I mean, seriously--what's up with that?

Edited October 30, 2015 by Just_A_Guy

[Jane_Doe]

 

* The only reason for the LDS missionaries, is to bring fresh blood into Utah, because inbreeding is a problem here in the 2000's.

 

 

I hadn't heard that one before- it's a good laugh!

[Jane_Doe]

 

2.  The horns.  I mean, seriously--what's up with that?

 

I get the horns one a lot, and just laugh about it.

 

If you look up the backstory about it though, it becomes even more funny.  I don't remember the whole thing, but I think it involved a missionary whom convinced a southern mob not to lynch him via convincing them he had horns.

[Ironhold]

Good business investments to protect the church in the future are a LIE. Monson built a mall to line his pockets!

The mall was also part of a much larger plan meant to combat urban blight in downtown SLC. The idea was to make the mall and several other buildings more attractive so that businesses and residents will return to the area.

[Ironhold]

I get the horns one a lot, and just laugh about it.

 

If you look up the backstory about it though, it becomes even more funny.  I don't remember the whole thing, but I think it involved a missionary whom convinced a southern mob not to lynch him via convincing them he had horns.

Specifically, it was J. Golden Kimball.

The KKK was making a show of force against him and some other missionaries, and so he bluffed them by saying that Mormons grew horns by the light of the moon; if the Klan tried anything, they'd get gored.

They believed him.

[The Folk Prophet]

I dunno. I always thought the don't believe another gospel and no adding to the scriptures things were pretty ignorant.

[Sunday21]

The worst I have been told is that Mormons never change their underwear. A professor told me this. Some strange reference to temple garments is my guess. Maybe they are too sacred to be washed? And that Mormon women do not enjoy sex. Reason for supposing this? Because they have so many children. Again from this professor. Go figure.

[Ironhold]

The worst I have been told is that Mormons never change their underwear. A professor told me this. Some strange reference to temple garments is my guess. Maybe they are too sacred to be washed? And that Mormon women do not enjoy sex. Reason for supposing this? Because they have so many children. Again from this professor. Go figure.

Sounds like a prof who doesn't deserve their post.

Temple garments can be washed just like anything else, and the bit about sex is a total non sequitur.

[Guest]

I've always said that Mormon women have lots of children and love handles because all we get is food and lovin'. :)

[Vort]

The worst I have been told is that Mormons never change their underwear. A professor told me this. Some strange reference to temple garments is my guess. Maybe they are too sacred to be washed? And that Mormon women do not enjoy sex. Reason for supposing this?

 

Maybe because their husbands never change their underwear?

[Crypto]

Maybe because their husbands never change their underwear?

ewww  

[Guest]

A friend at work told me that Mormons still wear 19th century clothing and did not believe in modern devices such as cars.  When I told him that was erroneous, he pointed to some documentary he saw on PBS.

 

My response:

 

"Read my lips. <exaggerating my mouth> We are fine with modern clothing and modern conveniences.  I live an hour's drive away from work.  How do you think I got here this morning?"

 

He still had to take a few days to go through a paradigm shift after that.  During that time, he'd come to me with questions like:  So, you've read what your beliefs actually are, right?  Are you really a practicing Mormon?  So, driving a car doesn't make you a bad Mormon?

 

I'd roll my eyes at each one.

[Ironhold]

A friend at work told me that Mormons still wear 19th century clothing and did not believe in modern devices such as cars.  When I told him that was erroneous, he pointed to some documentary he saw on PBS.

 

My response:

 

"Read my lips. <exaggerating my mouth> We are fine with modern clothing and modern conveniences.  I live an hour's drive away from work.  How do you think I got here this morning?"

 

He still had to take a few days to go through a paradigm shift after that.  During that time, he'd come to me with questions like:  So, you've read what your beliefs actually are, right?  Are you really a practicing Mormon?  So, driving a car doesn't make you a bad Mormon?

 

I'd roll my eyes at each one.

The FLDS group does indeed maintain some social throwbacks to the 1800s, so that may be where part of the confusion comes from.

Also, I've heard something of an urban legend which claims that the French version of the film "Witness" erroneously referred to the Amish individuals in the film as Mormons, something that didn't help anything.

[Guest]

I worked with a lovely Christian lady who was appalled to learn that our Gospel Doctrine teacher was a woman. Women are to stay silent, after all, and absolutely not speak in church. I think that was my first (and maybe only) experience with someone having a problem with how liberal the church is.

[Jane_Doe]

I worked with a lovely Christian lady who was appalled to learn that our Gospel Doctrine teacher was a woman. Women are to stay silent, after all, and absolutely not speak in church. I think that was my first (and maybe only) experience with someone having a problem with how liberal the church is.

 

 

I get a lot of the misconception "you going don't let your women do anything- they never speak at church!".  Which makes me laugh, and I reply (if it's applicable that week), "Well, I guess I better pack up and go home then, cause I was in town was to hear my sister give the sermon   "

[beefche]

A friend at work told me that Mormons still wear 19th century clothing and did not believe in modern devices such as cars.  When I told him that was erroneous, he pointed to some documentary he saw on PBS.

 

My response:

 

"Read my lips. <exaggerating my mouth> We are fine with modern clothing and modern conveniences.  I live an hour's drive away from work.  How do you think I got here this morning?"

 

He still had to take a few days to go through a paradigm shift after that.  During that time, he'd come to me with questions like:  So, you've read what your beliefs actually are, right?  Are you really a practicing Mormon?  So, driving a car doesn't make you a bad Mormon?

 

I'd roll my eyes at each one.

 

 

I had a similar experience. At work one day, I was chatting with a cow-orker and asked about her weekend. She said she and her husband spent the weekend in north, central Indiana (an area known for Amish people living there). She said it was fun, but she kept getting frustrated getting stuck behind the Mormons all the time. I asked what she meant. You know, the Mormons and their horse/buggies. It's frustrating being in a car and getting stuck behind them waiting for the buggy to finally pull over for us to pass.

 

When I pointed out that she is referring to the Amish and not Mormons (she even confirmed that she went to Amish Acres, a touristy spot in that area), she insisted I was wrong and they were in fact, Mormons. I kept telling her I was a Mormon, but she didn't believe me. She ended up asking another cow-orker who confirmed I'm a Mormon and I wear "normal" clothes and drive a car.  

[The Folk Prophet]

I get a lot of the misconception "you going don't let your women do anything- they never speak at church!". Which makes me laugh, and I reply (if it's applicable that week), "Well, I guess I better pack up and go home then, cause I was in town was to hear my sister give the sermon "

But... Women staying silent in church is biblical.