Booze and Coffee at home...

[Lost Boy]

OK, so this kind of goes along with the selling of Alcohol question.

Do you permit your friends to drink coffee and alcohol at your house?

My personal take is that if they want to bring it, they are welcome to and consume it so long as they don't get obnoxious or drunk to the point that they can't drive.  And they have to take it home with them. 

I will buy coffee on occasion for when the in-laws come to visit.

I figure my kids know what is right and wrong.  Showing them that interacting with people that drink is not something to shun is not a bad thing.

[Guest]

I don't think I'd allow it in my own home.  My home is supposed to be second only to the temple (or equal to it) in sacredness.  I would not defile a temple in such a way.

[Just_A_Guy]

For me:  Coffee—sure.  Abstaining from coffee is merely a token of a covenant I, as a Mormon, have made; I don’t see anything inherently sinful about others who have not made that covenant continuing to imbibe.

Alcohol—my beef with having that in my home is less that it would be some sort of defilement; and more that I just wouldn’t want it where my kids might get into it during their crazy teenaged years.  Once the kids are grown and out of the house, I still don’t love the idea of keeping harder stuff; but I wouldn’t object to keeping a bottle of wine on-hand.

[JohnsonJones]

No I do not.  They are not allowed to drink coffee or alcohol in my home if they are guests.  It gets harder if they live there.  In such an instance, I would allow them to drink what they desired as long as they kept it separated out. 

For example, my mother was an avid tea drinker.  When she visited when we were younger we did not have tea in the home and would not allow tea to be made.  HOWEVER, later in life she got to the point that it was either leave her in a nursing home or bring her home with us.  AT that point, she could make tea for herself is she so desired.

[mrmarklin]

No one here likes beer butt chicken?

Yes, we have beer just for that purpose. To roast excellent chicken on our barbecue. 

We have many friends that enjoy coffee in the morning. While we have never bought any coffee, we have allowed preparation at our homes. 

One thing I will not tolerate is indoor smoking. 

[unixknight]

I would prefer that people not drink coffee or tea in my house as a sign of respect for me, the host, but I don't make an issue of it when they do.  

Smoking... That's an absolute no.  So is drinking alcohol though I do occasionally use alcohol on cooking so if I were going to be flexible on any point, maybe that one would be it.

[Lost Boy]

12 minutes ago, mrmarklin said:

No one here likes beer butt chicken?

Yes, we have beer just for that purpose. To roast excellent chicken on our barbecue. 

We have many friends that enjoy coffee in the morning. While we have never bought any coffee, we have allowed preparation at our homes. 

One thing I will not tolerate is indoor smoking. 

I completely agree on the smoking.  Yuk. 

[Midwest LDS]

Coffee doesn't bother me, as it doesn't cause any social problems, and they have not covenanted to follow WOW. Although if you want it in my house you need to bring it, I won't buy it. Absolutely no alcohol. Way to many negative experiences with alcohol in my life to let that crap in my house unless it's specifically for cooking.

[mirkwood]

Nobody drinks alcohol in my home.  My dad is the only coffee drinker and on the rare visits (he lives out of state) he buys his own in the morning when he goes to get his newspaper.  I won't provide it for him.

[Guest MormonGator]

Coffee-yes, we have a coffee maker too for our friends to use. I have no problem with it. 

Alcohol-yes. My extended family collects wine and I'll buy it for them too. They don't buy it for me, obviously but I have no problem with it being consumed here. 

Cigarettes-yes, outside on my porch. Same with cigars. I don't allow weed just because it's still illegal down here and I don't want to get arrested. 
 

[NightSG]

1 hour ago, mrmarklin said:

One thing I will not tolerate is indoor smoking. 

My grandparents had a section of the enclosed back porch where they kept an ashtray and a few lighters just in case.  It could be opened up via two large windows to the living room to cool it off, or four large windows to the outside to air it out, so they weren't sending guests out into the weather to smoke, while still keeping the smoke out of the house.

It was mostly storage for grandma's canning and granddad's preference for buying toilet paper and paper towels by the pickup load.  Later, they put a wood stove back there, and insulated exterior windows.  It could be used to cook in a power outage, but filled up with mesquite and with a couple box fans in the windows to the living room, it would keep the ~3500 square foot house tolerably warm in freezing weather.  Closing off the living room and kitchen from the rest of the house, it would take about an hour before you had to open up the hallways and let some of the heat out.  My cousin is still using that stove to heat his poorly insulated ~150 year old 1,500 square foot house, and it will pretty much turn the whole thing into a sauna when he uses mesquite.

[zil]

2 hours ago, mrmarklin said:

beer butt chicken

This does not sound at all appealing.  "Beer chicken butt" sounds less appealing, but really, I think I'll pass either way.

[Lost Boy]

1 minute ago, zil said:

This does not sound at all appealing.  "Beer chicken butt" sounds less appealing, but really, I think I'll pass either way.

I have heard of beer can chicken.

[Overwatch]

I do not drink alcohol, smoke or even drink coffee. In fact none of it is allowed in my home. Not even because my wife is a member. I do not want my children partaking of those poisons. They are expensive and purposely addicting.

Out and about I do not care if my extended family or friends do it but a big NO in my sanctuary.

[seashmore]

Beer brats were a staple of my childhood in WI, so I see no problem cooking with alcohol. 

Cigarettes are a hard never. 

Currently I live alone and don't entertain, so alcohol is not an issue. When my mom visits, she brings a small coffee maker and I like the smell, so no problems for me, there. 

When I live with non LDS roommates (which is happening again soon) I follow George Albert Smith's creed and "seek not to force a man to do that which is right."  As long as it's consumed responsibly, it can be in a shared space.

Side note: anyone who knows me well enough to have my number ought to know me well enough that I will do anything in my power to prevent someone driving drunk. Including driving the friend of a friend home twenty minutes away in the next town over. (Which I've done for two different friends.) 

[Vort]

On 5/22/2018 at 6:32 PM, Lost Boy said:

OK, so this kind of goes along with the selling of Alcohol question.

Do you permit your friends to drink coffee and alcohol at your house?

My personal take is that if they want to bring it, they are welcome to and consume it so long as they don't get obnoxious or drunk to the point that they can't drive.  And they have to take it home with them. 

I will buy coffee on occasion for when the in-laws come to visit.

I figure my kids know what is right and wrong.  Showing them that interacting with people that drink is not something to shun is not a bad thing.

I had a close friend at Penn State who was Muslim. I would never have even considered bringing a pound of bacon to his house and cooking it up there, or (if I drank) bringing a bottle of wine or beer to drink there. Anyone who would have done such a thing would have been waaaaay out of line. Period.

I see no reason to prioritize my own values less than my Muslim friend's. So no, I would ask my friends not to drink alcohol or smoke or even drink coffee or tea at my home.

If I had in-laws who smoked and/or drank alcohol and/or coffee, I'm not sure what I would do. I think I would not want alcohol in my house at all, because I consider it a poison and a blight on society and certainly don't want it anywhere near my young children. Ditto with cigarettes, perhaps less so for society's sake but even moreso because they reek. I have a bit of a soft spot for coffee, since my grandparents drank coffee, so I might show some leeway there. Or maybe not; I'm not sure.

[unixknight]

8 hours ago, Vort said:

I had a close friend at Penn State who was Muslim. I would never have even considered bringing a pound of bacon to his house and cooking it up there, or (if I drank) bringing a bottle of wine or beer to drink there. Anyone who would have done such a thing would have been waaaaay out of line. Period.

I see no reason to prioritize my own values less than my Muslim friend's. So no, I would ask my friends not to drink alcohol or smoke or even drink coffee or tea at my home.

If I had in-laws who smoked and/or drank alcohol and/or coffee, I'm not sure what I would do. I think I would not want alcohol in my house at all, because I consider it a poison and a blight on society and certainly don't want it anywhere near my young children. Ditto with cigarettes, perhaps less so for society's sake but even moreso because they reek. I have a bit of a soft spot for coffee, since my grandparents drank coffee, so I might show some leeway there. Or maybe not; I'm not sure.

I agree with all of this as a matter of perspective. 

In terms of speculating:  I think the reason LDS people tend to more frequently be flexible on this stuff is because other religions' dietary requirements are more general and more absolute than in LDS.  For us, to not live the WoW is to deny ourselves access to the Temple.  For others, it's  considered more of an outright sin.

...as far as I understand it, anyway.  I've never been a member of a religion with strict dietary rules before I joined this one.  Even when I was Catholic, we were supposed to abstain from meat on Fridays, especially during Lent, but if you didn't nobody cared. 

[Guest MormonGator]

3 minutes ago, unixknight said:

  Even when I was Catholic, we were supposed to abstain from meat on Fridays, especially during Lent, but if you didn't nobody cared. 

I remember watching a teacher eat a turkey sandwich once on a Friday during lent. I saw him go to  communion on Sunday-I was so confused! 

[askandanswer]

We have two bottles of cooking wine in our pantry. They've been untouched for about the last ten years. Does this stuff go off after that kind of time?

[SilentOne]

26 minutes ago, askandanswer said:

We have two bottles of cooking wine in our pantry. They've been untouched for about the last ten years. Does this stuff go off after that kind of time?

Isn't wine supposed to get better with age?

[Guest MormonGator]

19 minutes ago, SilentOne said:

Isn't wine supposed to get better with age?

Yes, but only for expensive wine. Your average grocery store wine probably won't age well. It also depends how you store it. 

Edited May 28, 2018 by MormonGator

[Guest Godless]

1 hour ago, askandanswer said:

We have two bottles of cooking wine in our pantry. They've been untouched for about the last ten years. Does this stuff go off after that kind of time?

Yes, especially if they've been opened. 

[Lee]

On 5/23/2018 at 2:32 AM, Lost Boy said:

OK, so this kind of goes along with the selling of Alcohol question.

Do you permit your friends to drink coffee and alcohol at your house?

My personal take is that if they want to bring it, they are welcome to and consume it so long as they don't get obnoxious or drunk to the point that they can't drive.  And they have to take it home with them. 

 I will buy coffee on occasion for when the in-laws come to visit.

 I figure my kids know what is right and wrong.  Showing them that interacting with people that drink is not something to shun is not a bad thing.

I have a few friends that bring beer over when we watch sports together, I don't have a problem with it and neither does my wife unless they start being too drunk then my wife has a problem. 

Our house came with an impressive coffee machine so we like to show it off to guests, we store some coffee pods or beans and offer our guests coffee if they drink it. 

[2ndRateMind]

Being the forum unbeliever, I thought it might be useful to inject a comment.

I am a coffee drinker, tea drinker (under protest, in the afternoon with cucumber and/or tomato sandwiches), wine and beer lover, and a smoker. I don't often turn down the opportunity for a gin martini, or a dry, fino sherry, either.

And I like my vices. They prevent me from becoming smug, complacent and judgmental. When I hear of some celebrity overdose by drugs, or see some addict on the street, begging, I just wonder if I am so much better. And in this way, my minor proclivities protect me from a worse one: that I might think myself so good, I must be better than all those who do not observe my arbitrary dietary laws.

Best wishes, 2RM.

Edited May 29, 2018 by 2ndRateMind

[Guest MormonGator]

2 minutes ago, 2ndRateMind said:

Being the forum unbeliever,

We have several people on this forum who are unbelievers actually. @Godless comes to mind, but there are others. 

 

3 minutes ago, 2ndRateMind said:

And I like my vices. They prevent me from becoming smug, complacent and judgmental

I like mine too.