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Hi Everyone! Hope you are all well, just wanted to let you all know that I have set a date for my Baptism in May, Its a while off yet as I am having a baby in March. I am very happy and excited about it and have no doubts that I am doing the right thing. Thanks to everyone for answering my questions on here :)

Douglas Scott Barney II June 3, 1971 – January 17, 2016 Officer Douglas Barney, 44, was killed in the line of duty on Sunday, January 17, 2016, while trying to question a man who seemingly had done nothing more than leave the scene of a traffic accident. An 18 year veteran police officer, Doug loved law enforcement and interacting with the community. Doug was perfectly suited to law enforcement..., never able to sit perfectly still, always eager for something exciting, and relating to other people in a down-to-earth, sincere way. Doug was born June 3, 1971 on a military base in Taiwan to Douglas Scott and Darlene Heinz Barney. Doug was raised in Anaheim, California, and worked at Disneyland as one of his first jobs. He attended Clara Barton Elementary School and Loara High School. He played water polo and was on the high school swim team. Just before his senior year, his family moved to Orem, Utah where Doug graduated from Orem High School. He loved the move to Utah and being able to ride dirt bikes daily in the hills behind his family home. After graduation Doug worked a series of jobs, mostly in the auto mechanics field like his father. He loved working on cars and raced his cars a couple of times at the old Bonneville Raceway. Doug and his wife, Erika, grew up near each other in Anaheim and he liked to tell stories of how he had always had a crush on her. When Erika moved to Utah to attend BYU they continued their friendship and he tried his hardest to get her to commit to dating him (she had a habit of inviting her roommates along when he asked her out for pie.) In 1995 he showed up to her apartment unexpectedly and asked her to marry him. He asked again every day for several months until she finally accepted. Doug married Erika Gilroy on February 17, 1996 in his family home in Orem. Their marriage was later solemnized in the Jordan River Temple. Doug passed away one month before their 20th wedding anniversary. After their wedding Doug told Erika that although he loved working on cars, it was a bit too lonely of a type of work for him. He didn’t like being underneath the cars by himself all day long and would tend to move around looking for conversations with other mechanics. He admitted to his wife that he had always wanted to be a police officer and, with her blessing, began applying with different agencies. Doug was hired as a corrections officer with the Salt Lake County Sheriff’s Office in December of 1998 and one year later was hired as a patrol officer. He worked primarily in Kearns and Magna, Taylorsville City, and Holladay City during his career. Doug earned a bachelor’s degree from the University of Utah by taking two classes a semester while working full time to support his family. His degree was in Sociology with a Criminal Justice certificate. Doug is survived by his wife,Erika, their three children, Matilda 18 (Matti), Meredith 16 (Merri), and Jacob 13 (Jack). He is also survived by his mother, Darlene, and his three siblings and their spouses, Tammy (Jason), Russell (Heather), and Brian (Jennifer). He was preceded in death by his father, Douglas Scott Barney. Between Doug’s and Erika’s siblings there are 23 nieces and nephews who love Doug, and each are pretty sure they are his favorite. Doug had a special way of relating to children and loved to hold them, tickle them, and incorrectly guess their age. His church family knew it was his habit to come to church and look around for someone with a new baby to sit near, with the hope that the baby would get fussy and they would let him hold it. Doug was a devoted husband and father who loved spending time with his family and talking about them when he couldn’t be with them. He loved teaching his kids how to shoot guns, appreciate cars, and the basic approach to a few defensive control techniques. He loved music and listened to every conceivable type of music. For years he kept a cassette tape keyed up in his patrol car to Kenny Rogers’ Long Arm of the Law, which he would sing loudly when a prisoner seemed especially sulky on the way to jail. The end result was usually that they would come into the jail laughing together. Doug was well known for his boisterous personality. He was larger than life in every way. He was very funny and was often able to diffuse a tense situation with a perfectly timed joke. It is very hard for a criminal to consider violence while laughing. Doug’s law enforcement brothers remember him for his signature greeting of, “hey, brotha!” or “hey, sista!”, and an almost knocking-the-wind-out pat on the back. Doug struggled with bladder cancer and the side effects of treatments and surgeries for many years. He was frustrated by the time it took him away from work and from his family, but had an amazing ability to stay positive and upbeat and even lighthearted about the challenges. His only desire, always, was to be able to get back to work and to take care of his family. Doug will be forever missed. The family would like to thank the community, both locally and nationally, for the outpouring of love that has been given this week. Services will be held at the Maverik Center, 3200 Decker Lake Drive, West Valley City, Utah on Monday, January 25, 2016 at 11:00 a.m. A public viewing will be held at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Stake Center at 2811 S 6400 W on Sunday, January 24 from 5:00 – 9:00 p.m. Interment will be at the Orem City Cemetery.

I agree about Nibley being useful, but I somewhat disagree with characterizing him as "technical". The man was as gifted as anyone I have ever heard with relaying information in an accessible format, making even complex things understandable (if not always simple). He was sometimes dense, in the sense of packing a lot of information into what he said, and he sometimes had a propensity for giving a quote in a foreign language (Latin and German seemed to be his favorites), but he always provided the translation, so it's not like he lectured at you in German.

Of Faith and Reason 81 evidences of the Book of Mormon by Michael Ash Google Books Amazon Deseret Book There are others, but this book is a very good brief overview of quite a few things. If there is anything in particular that you are interested in there are also other books. You can also find quite a few books on the maxwell institue website. Anything by Hugh Nibley is good, though technical (Find and read it HERE)

So I'm going to step outside of my no-frills-teaching zone and actually bring a centerpiece for my Relief Society lesson tomorrow. It may even look nice, but that's still a far-fetched notion. Wish me luck!

http://www.ksl.com/?sid=38168303&nid=148&title=veteran-police-officer-gunman-killed-in-holladay-shooting&fm=home_page&s_cid=topstory Doug and I were area partners in our rookie years. He was a good partner, cop and man. RIP Brother we have it from here. EOW 1-17-16

1. The sermon on the mount. Each individual requirement is simple, but to master them is a project that will take most, if not all, of us longer than mortality to master. Think of all the hypotheticals and requests for advice that come up on these forums. And we can't all agree on what ought to be done in these scenarios. Mortality can be confusing, and figuring out how to apply those Gospel truths we know can be a challenge. 2. Basically, anything that's not doctrinal, but which leadership or peers press for (or which we pressure ourselves to do for the wrong reasons). Remember President Uchtdorf's own examples about knitting something for each RS sister before a lesson - potholders, or something (Forget Me Not)? Or the one about the "simplify" quilt (from the talk you're referencing, I think)? I remember a young woman posting about how a priesthood meeting in the middle of the week would go long past the time it took to cover business, and consist of an hour or more of socialization before the person in charge would end the meeting and have a closing prayer. I've heard of wards (esp. YSA wards) having activities every day - that would sure feel overwhelming to me. I could probably make these up all night long. Hopefully you'll get real examples that are better, but, FWIW: How about if some RS Pres obsessed with appearances insisted the teachers bring fancy decorations on Sunday, in addition to whatever lesson they prepared. Someone pressuring you to buy software / an app / online service in order to work with them "their way" in relation to a calling. How about uncoordinated leadership: A SP says "read the BofM for 1/2 hour per day", the Bishop says "read the NT for 1/2 hour per day", the SS and RS teachers say "read the lesson each week", your HTers and VTers challenge you to read the entire Ensign each month, and two talks from the most recent GC each week... Pretty soon, you can't do anything except read things all these people have challenged you to read. The principle of reading the scriptures, lessons, Ensign, and GC are all good, but each person should be able to figure out how to accomplish this best for themselves rather than having a bunch of people doing something like this. (No, I've never seen this happen, it's just an extreme example of something that could happen if people didn't coordinate / think first about what they were doing.) From my perspective, the Church is moving continually farther from giving members lists of things to accomplish. I think that's the point - each person figures out how best to apply Gospel principles in their life - we no longer need busywork.

Awesome news !!

Very happy for you. You will make some great friends!

Or Lehi in the Desert - which includes many (if not all) the same info, but in a different style (I prefer the style of Lehi in the Desert - so check out the first chapters of each and see which style you like).

I would recommend An Approach to the Book of Mormon by Hugh Nibley. It's very good. Here's a link where you can read it online: http://publications.mi.byu.edu/book/an-approach-to-the-book-of-mormon/

Yeah!!!

Congratulations! I'm very happy for you. Wish I could be there.

Agreed, though the book linked-to (Enoch the Prophet) was the hardest of the seven I've read so far. As to him not lecturing in a foreign language, my mom, or one of her sisters (I no longer remember who told the story), was taking a religion class from him at BYU. He walked in carrying a stack of books up to his neck, plopped them on the counter, took the top one from the stack and started reading to them - in Hebrew (if I remember the language right - either way, it was not English). At one point he paused, and said in English, "Now notice how it says here..." and then re-read part of the book. Eventually one of the students was able to get his attention and point out it was supposed to be a Book of Mormon class. :)

I am currently getting baptised in May but before then I was a very active Catholic, My Husband of 6 years is a Buddhist. I love my Husband very much he is a very good Husband and Father but sometimes it takes a LOT of effort to make things work, especially with Children being involved and I have had to stop being so "sensitive" about my faith as my Husband will not withhold any punches if he thinks something is wrong. Can't really comment on the moral side of things, Buddhists have quite moral guidelines not dissimilar to our own with no Alcohol, smoking, drugs, sexual misconduct etc.. I think even as a Catholic I would have had problems marrying someone who did not have the same moral focus as myself. My advice is set some boundaries.. if he cannot respect them he isn't the one for you as he cannot respect your point of view. Also be realistic, love him for him, I have come to the conclusion that my Husband may never join the Church (well in this life anyway) yes it makes me sad but you cannot force people to do things they do not want to do. If you are starting the relationship thinking you can persuade him to join the Church you will only end up disappointed. x

I am sorry, this just..... is not correct. I know you went through things as well, but no one is ever at fault for being violated or abused. No one asks for it. Typically, healing is about learning how to NOT take the blame, and how to release the shame etc.....and gain understanding that we were not at fault. When someone harms another person, it is their crime to carry, and answer for.....not the victim's. Our society still at times struggles to grasp this. We live in a world where women are typically blamed." Well, what was she wearing? What kind of past history does she have?" .....No, means no. If a man wears a football jersey does that mean he is asking for people to tackle/ body slam him? Of course not. I was 14. I blamed myself for years because I did not trust my instinct and leave the room when my friend went out.....I thought it was my fault because I was stupid, because I had been wearing a skirt, because I did not fight harder.......however, it was NOT my fault. Often we blame ourselves because it gives us a sense of control....if we are to blame, it means we can some how correct, or prevent it from happening again. It gives us a target, and something to lash-out at when we do not have the option to do that against the one who truly is to blame.

I am going to use myself as an example. In the past I would not have even been able to talk about things, because I felt shamed, and constantly worried that others would be uncomfortable, or reject me. However, one of the stages in my own healing process has been to be more vocal, and I have discovered doing so has helped many others. I had the kind of childhood people write books about. Narcissistic/ sociopath mother who took pleasure in harming me, and didn't care about what my stepfather, or her boyfriends did. I was beaten constantly, choked, burned, slammed into things, had teeth punched out....on top of being molested, and constantly verbally shredded ( worthless, no one will love, ugly, stupid etc...). When stepfather left, the neglect started..... lack of supervision, lack of food, utilities often off because money went to drugs.....and when I was eleven I had an excruciating medical condition that any adult would have rushed to the emergency room with, but because I was a child.....I had to endure it for months. I knew I was dying and didn't understand anyone was supposed to care.....my attempts to get help resulted in beatings. It got to the point that I could barely walk....and I prayed to not wake-up/ to die....so the pain would end. Screamed for hours and was ignored. I then was assaulted when I was 14, and kept silent because my mother had blamed and punished me previously, and I knew she would have again. Did I go through hell with ptsd, and trying to sort it all out? Yes. However, here I am now....talking. For me, I discovered I had to face everything-- fully feel, think, explore etc... and one by one, the flashbacks stopped. I started regaining my life, and myself again, and was stronger.....as well as came out with a stronger testimony as well. I was extremely bent and weak for a while..... but now I have very deep roots. If I was able to achieve that, with everything that was stacked against me..... anyone can......just in their own way, time, and methods. So please do not judge people simply based on where they are in their progress. That would essentially be like looking at the initial base sketch of a painting and making a determination that it is rubbish, when in reality it is a master piece in the making. Elizabeth Smart is amazing, and I cannot express that enough. However, other people should not be compared to her, or expected to come-out the same. There are factors that are not being considered. She went home to a loving, supportive family, and received care. Many survivors suffer the abuse from the hands of their family ( who are supposed to love and protect them), and experience it for years..... in silence. No support, love etc.... You can't expect someone who has had those kind of experiences to instantly pop-up healed and strong on their own. Some people do not have any love or light to "stretch towards". When I used my analogy about being trapped between locked doors----that was because I did not have anyone, and had never even experienced being touched with love etc.... You equated Elizabeth Smart to that, but she did have previous loving experiences, and went home to a loving family.... so again, you cannot compare, or expect the same results from everyone. There are so many factors that contribute. Those ( like myself) who were abused at very young ages often have nothing else to refer to. I grew up thinking touch was something that caused harm and pain. People cannot instantly be "normal"..... they typically need to experience positive experiences, love etc... to help break original programming. And yet, like I mentioned previously....... that sometimes can be hard to find when people simply keep pushing away.

Though I didn't know Officer Barney, this all just brings back such memories of when Draper City officer Derek Johnson was killed. Derek I knew. You can't help but feel that any officer in this town that dies in such a manner is personal to you. Both just going to talk to someone and ending up being shot and killed. So sad and such a waste. I know Derek was an awesome man, husband and father to his son. I really feel for the family of Officer Barney. You always know when someone is in law enforcement that they might not come home that day...but you hope it never happens.

Personally, I have found that all the evidence for the truth of the Book of Mormon has been compiled in this one place (important to view the JST for the end of v11). You might find more of what you're looking for, however, at fairmormon.org. That's the best I can do for you. FWIW.

Hands up ....don't taser ..... Lol

Your colleague was a lovely human being. I am so sorry that this terrible event took place.

Ready for Officer Barney.

CRITIC Independent evidence for the Book of Mormon RESPONSE Here is a letter from W.F. Albright in response to a letter from a critic of the church Dear Mr. Howard:Thanks for sending me a copy of the publication of Joseph Smith's Egyptian Alphabet and Grammar. There does appear to be evidence that Joseph Smith had studied some Egyptian. For one thing, he undoubtedly spent a great deal of money and effort in trying to master Egyptian, but, as you know, when the Book of Mormon was written, Egyptian had just begun to be deciphered and *it is all the more surprising that there are two Egyptian names, Paanch and Pahor(an) which appear together in the Book of Mormon in close connection with a reference to the original language as being "Reformed Egyptian." * I read an extremely interesting account by Fawn Brodie, No Man Knows My History, in chapter 12, in which she deals with Joseph Smith's tremendous efforts to learn languages. *There were, however, as yet no Egyptian grammars or dictionaries in existence,* so the best he could do was to follow books from the seventeenth and eighteenth centures (including some from the nineteenth) which treated the hieroglyphs very much as Horapollo did about the sixth century A.D.--as pure ideographs. Joseph Smith's translation does not, however, follow the pseudo-Neo-Platonism of Athanasius Kircher in the seventeenth century, but is a kind of quasi-biblical composition. In any case it has nothing whatever to do with the original Egyptian manuscript of a copy of the Book of the Dead.The supposed digits have nothing whatever to do with the figures. You must remember that our digits go back to India through the Arabs and were not brought to Europe until less than a thousand years ago.I do not for a moment believe that Joseph Smith was trying to mislead anyone; I accept the point of view of a Jewish friend of mine at the University of Utah, that he was a religious genius and that he was quite honest in believing that he really could decipher these ancient texts. But to insist that he did is really doing a disservice to the cause of a great church and its gifted founder.Cordially,(signature)W. F. Albright Here is his biography https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_F._Albright NOTE I hope to get an image of the original letter. I have seen it but misplaced the link.

People do change; but going into a marriage with him being an atheist and the hope that he will change is the wrong way to start off a marriage. You've got to accept the person as they are and accept the fact that there is a very strong likelihood that they will remain that way for this life. Are you willing to accept that he may never come to church, he may never bless your home with the Priesthood, may never baptize your kids, may never take you to the temple. You simply have to accept those things as a reality before marriage. Marrying an atheist? Nope, very strongly against it-I will condemn it. As much as religion is a worldview and a way of thinking the same is true for atheism-it gets to the root core of who we are, how we act, what are goals are in life. People can claim to be good people and be atheist, and that may be true-they very well might be good people. However, atheism as a philosophy and a way of life cannot sustain society nor can it teach society to be moral, just, good over the long term. Everyone's goal is to maximize our happiness-even the drug addict is doing his best to maximize his happiness. The farther in the future we are able to see, the more likely that we will do things today that while in the short-term seem to make us unhappy they will in the long-term make us very happy. It boils down to the simple truth that if there is no hereafter, the time horizon for an atheist to maximize their happiness is their death. Therefore as a philosophy and a way of life underlining everything for an atheist is what can I do to live as long as possible and be as happy as possible during that lifespan. What that ultimately means that as a way of life, the moment that an atheist believes that their current situation is not making them happy, they will immediately start to change it regardless of the consequences to other people. Which means it is okay for them to lie or cheat if necessary if they believe it will make them happy. It becomes a very narcissistic way of life. For a person of Faith, we recognize that sometimes we have situations where we do things that cause pain and harm to us personally, with the faith and hope that those decisions will reap rewards in the hereafter. Marriage is a perfect example. For an atheist, if the marriage becomes difficult why bother sticking around? For a couple of Faith, they believe that while it is difficult it will be worth it because they made a covenant to God. All the major life decisions, when to have kids, how many kids to have, why are we having kids, how do you raise kids, what kind of household should we have, are material things really important, do both spouses work, what activities to do, etc. Literally everything is affected by those two diametrically opposed worldviews-one of faith, one not of faith. I recognize that modern culture has sold you a big fat lie about love and romance. Every movie you watch all that matters is that the two people "love each other", yet that can't even define it. It is so squishy and fleeting, a mirage is what movies and hollywood sell, but it ain't the real thing. Yet, I can define it. True love and loving each other is about sticking with each other through the good and the bad. True love is forgiving your spouse and being a helpmeet when they have an addiction to porn; true love cleaning up the vomit on the floor after they have had the flu, true love is being by your spouse when they have a disease or are terminally ill-visiting them in the hospital every day for months on end when you have a full-time job and kids or 100 other things to do, true love is picking up your spouse from the airport from a business trip at 11pm and not complaining, true love is self-sacrifice it is about building each other up and honest to goodness through hell or highwater being side-by-side with that person. It ain't the glamorous things that make true love-it is what happens in the daily grind of life that determines true life. Life is hard enough as it is and believe me-it can be very, very hard-soulcrushing hard. Starting it off with someone of the same faith can make those soulcrushing hard moments just a little bit easier. My favorite video about love from the Church:

Frankly, I wasn't sure what his atheism had to do with your chastity issues until yjacket gave insight. It seems ultimately solving and preventing chastity issues makes for two main solutions: get married or break up. While I won't totally condemn marrying an atheist I won't recommend it. And are you even at an age where you want to get married? Thus, the likely solution is leave him. Sorry.

As others have stated, I think you know the answer to this problem, but it's just hard to admit. Physical attraction is normal, but once those feelings have risen and you have acted upon them, there is no going back. Only moving further down the path of intimacy, thus leading to sex. The easiest (yet hardest, I'm sure for you) in this scenario is to stop the relationship now if you wish to stop breaking the law of chastity. There is just no other way for you to avoid committing that sin, knowing that you've crossed some very serious lines already. Try to think of the big picture in this case. What type of woman do you want to be like when you approach The Lord one day? Would He approve of the decisions you have made? If not, what can you do to change it so that you can find true happiness in His presence? Only you can make those choices in the end, not any of us. We can only provide the advice you probably don't want to hear.

An atheist and a Mormon walk into a bar ... What is it in your 'Mormonism' that attracts you to an atheist? You know, a couple of my LDS friends recently tried to set me up with a nice lady ... a nice Catholic lady. No thanks. I mean what kind of relationship could I have with a Catholic woman? We would go our separate ways on Sunday? No thanks. The best way in the world to enter into a relationship that will fail is to start out with two diametrically opposed people. Now, mind you, you are female (I hope) and he is male. So that is a big tremendous difference right there. After that one, you should try to find someone with whom you have something in common. Please note that I gave thanks to two above who had advice as to how to avoid mistakes. From you post, it seems the only thing you have in common with this guy is sex, and that is the worst thing to base a relationship on, particularly with your religious affiliation. dc

Don't date an atheist.

If you consider yourself a Mormon, act like one. Quit seeing him, especially since it is leading to fornication.

I'll give you the advice you don't want to hear. You already know the answer-you just are refusing to accept it. That refusal to accept the answer you know to be right will lead to much heartache in your life. Obeying the Law of Chastity when you are young and in love is hard enough as it is, you make it even harder on yourself when you are the only one who believes in it and the other person does not. For an atheist there are only two reasons not to have sex out of wedlock; STDs and babies and both of those are overcome by "protection". No matter what he claims or how strongly he claims to say to you about how he might believe sex before marriage is wrong--deep down in today's modern society there is absolutely no way he can be an atheist and firmly believe it. Not believing in a God, means not believing in scriptures and the scriptures are the only thing in our modern society that makes the claim, definitively sex before marriage is wrong. I'll tell you the other thing you don't want to hear; continue down this path and you will have sex with him. If that is what you desire then you will get it; if you desire to stay true to God then you already know what you have to do.