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  1. Thanks for the interesting report and analysis, mordorbund. A few thoughts off the top of my head: The doctrine of being "born again" is, of course, central to LDS theology. However, the way that term is used in larger society dictates much of how any question about it will be answered. If I were asked by a pollster if I had been "born again", I might say yes - I like to think that I would probably say yes. But I might well say "no", knowing that the American connotation of "born-agains" are Evangelical Protestants. neither of which I consider myself. (This, too, is according to popular usage; I most certainly am a lower-case-e "evangelist", as in one who preaches my religion, just as I hope that I have been lower-case-b-a "born again". But "an Evangelical" means a certain type of Protestant, just like being a "Born-Again" is a certain type of Protestant, and I do not self-identify with either group.) In short: That less than 1/4 of Latter-day Saints self-identify as "born again" is a somewhat regrettable but expected result of how that term is used in America today. Mormons have a (relatively) high retention rate, well over 50%, largely because LDS theology is specific and (again, relatively) unchanging. We are not, as Paul warns against, "blown about by every wind of doctrine." This gives people something solid to either accept or reject, rather than some squishy whatever-it-is that is neither fish nor fowl. As Matt Walsh pointed out very recently, the mass exodus we perceive from much of "traditional" Christianity is because it really isn't traditional at all. It's a laid-back, come-as-you-are mess of loud music and trite, meatless sermons. "Boring" was Walsh's word, and boring in a far worse and more insidious way than Mormons sometimes complain about sacrament meetings being boring. I'm thinking a better term might be "unchallenging." Mormonism urges people to improve themselves, and not merely in politically correct, largely meaningless surface ways. Personally, I disbelieve the old saw that women are "more spiritual" (read: "better") than men. Women are more likely to follow their emotional responses while men are more likely to follow their intellectual conclusions. Call it "pride" or whatever else you want, but in my five-decade experience as a pretty typical man who trusts his thoughts over his feelings, I have found my deep gut feelings to bat close to 1.000. My intellectual ponderings are way below that. This might well be a weakness in men -- I think it's not necessarily a weakness or a strength overall, just another way of dealing with reality -- but I do think that in matters of spiritual importance, the "follow your gut" method yields vastly better results. Having said that, I note that the male/female divide in Mormonism is 46/54, which seems large but is actually much smaller than the other denominations mentioned. I attribute this to the fact that we teach our children from a young age to listen to and trust the Spirit, which leads to more gut-level decision-making, and also that men are given a well-defined and vitally important role in life which they then try to live up to. This keeps them (us) more engaged in religious life. Mormonism is not becoming significantly more racially diverse -- in the US. Across the world, that's definitely not the case.
    3 points
  2. Pew is highly respected, and these results are being discussed with great vigor amongst the leadership of most Christian organizations. One fact that is left unsaid (I will find and post the link here), is that the rise in "unaffiliated" or "nones" is doomed to be temporary. This group is more highly educated, more Caucasian, and far less productive (in the natural sense). http://www.pewforum.org/2015/04/02/religious-projections-2010-2050/ As for LDS, or even Jehovah's Witnesses, saying they are born again, I can see that as a positive for interfaith dialogue. I can also see many evangelicals have some theological heartburn about it. :-)
    3 points
  3. I LOVE this! https://youtu.be/YAuqdPWTGLI
    2 points
  4. Backroads

    Gossip and social media

    So there's been this case in Australia of a mother who took a photo of a man at the store and declared him a pedophile on Facebook. She thought he was taking photos of her children when he was taking a selfie. Any who, the photo went viral and became a big mess. This leaves me wondering about our ability to spread information including unfounded thoughts so quickly due to social media and smart phones. Do we lose the tendency to think things over when we can do things instantly? Apparently the woman feels horrible about her assumption and post, but damage is done. While gossip spreads fast, does social media make it all the deadlier? On another note, what do such incidents say about society's treatment of men?
    2 points
  5. Finrock

    Believe The Best

    Believe the best. It's one of the ABC's of marriage but it has a wider application and utility. Not too long ago I made a personal committment to believe the best of other people and this simple change in how I think has made a significant difference in the quality of my life and how I feel about myself and others. It started out with me wanting to have a better relationship with some family members. I soon discovered that I should not limit this attitude to just a few select people but that I should adopt this as how I interact with all people, regardless of who they are and what the situation is. When I believe the best of others then I am less likely to be offended. I have found that I am able to understand other people a little bit better because I am not assuming that they are being negative or even if they are actually being negative, believing the best about them reminds me that they are just people like me, struggling to deal with life, their feelings, emotions, or weaknesses. I can have empathy and not be offended by words or actions which typically are intended to do harm when I believe the best of others. Believing the best of others has allowed me to have more fruitful discussions in life and on this forum. It has been wonderful. Inside of each person is a spirit that is clean and pure. Each person has a special relationship with Heavenly Father and has the potential of being gods and goddesses. I am not more special or less special than others. We are all essentially in the same condition, living with essentially the same struggles, working out our salvation the best that we can with the knowledge, abilities, and talents that we have been given or which we have gained through our magnifying that which we have. Believe the best. -Finrock
    2 points
  6. I had posted another thread about how it bothered me for over 3 years that men are attracted to other women in a relationship. I suspected that God was starting to change how I felt 2 days after I started praying about it, but I kept second guessing myself, asking myself, are you SURE you feel this way? over and over to the point that I got very confused and didn't know how I felt. What I DO know is that I had this thought "A man may be attracted to other women for a few seconds, but it would be you he really cared about". My first reaction to this thought was a feeling of peace and feeling like I would feel comfortable being in a relationship. Now, I had heard people say this to me many times over the years, but my mind and heart responded, "OK, sure, but it still bothers me that he's attracted to them, even if it's me that he loves and wants to be with." Before I wrote this, I read something about how men are genetically programmed to desire more than one woman. My first reaction to this was a feeling of relief and understanding. Like this is okay. I understand. I had also heard this one hundreds of times and every time I heard it my feeling was, "That may be the case and they are hardwired this way and can't help it, but it still bothers me and seems terribly wrong." Perhaps instead of second guessing myself over and over and accusing myself of not really feeling OK with this, I should accept that Heavenly Father is responding to my prayers and trying to change how I feel because I did pray to Him several times asking Him to somehow make me feel okay with this and be able to marry someday which is what He commands us to do. On a positive note, I just got hired as a Safeway clerk today so I'll be starting work there in a few days.
    2 points
  7. The Pew Research Center has released the results of their survey on America's Changing Religious Landscape, comparing 2014 with 2007. In the last 7 years, the population of Christians has dropped from 78% to 70% and unaffiliated increasing from 16% to 23%. PrisonChaplain, Assemblies of God was classified as "Pentecostal in the evangelical tradition" (in case you want to dig through for your own stats). The Mormon highlights:
    1 point
  8. I don't know about men being mistreated (obviously some men are..but as a group....?)...but as to social media....my basic opinion is that Facebook is evil and nothing good comes of it. Or at least any slight good that may come of it is so overshadowed by the evil that it should be, for all intents and purposes, shunned.
    1 point
  9. I think social media a fad that will wear itself out for reasons such as your story. At some point we all have to live in real life and this online world has to have shrinking influence. I'm not saying it will happen tomorrow. The Internet was a jolt to our system and evolution is slow. Evolution will eventually catch up.
    1 point
  10. You should put it on the market as soon as you can. The contract will stipulate that the tenant has occupancy until the end of the lease. It happens all the time. It will turn away some buyers, sure. But the same buyers would not have stayed in the market until August anyway (30-60 days max). Selling, like finding a job, is all about timing - hitting the market at the same time as the opportunity (buyer). You may not sell, but you will lose nothing. On the other hand, there is every possibility that you will sell to an investor or the people are looking only for the right house and not the right time (i.e. they can wait for occupancy). The market, at least in Colorado, is super hot right now. It will only wain as the summer goes on and more homes are on the market and builders complete more homes. Good luck!
    1 point
  11. I have a questioning mind. After all these years of talking with gays on this site, learning your viewpoints and trying to understand ( really I am) I'm still trying to get my head around homosexuality being something that identifies a person as any other inborn trait would. I think the first world especially has simply adopted the idea of sexual pleasure being the utopia of existence and that achieving it any way one can is perfectly justified, whether it's the usual way or not. I think that has a lot to do with why boys who may idolize other boys or are attracted to them "become" gay. Not because they really are, but because of the messages in the world. I just don't believe that you are either gay or you're not. For example I have always been attracted to women- beautiful women. It's an aesthetic thing for me. But those thoughts never took on a sexual tone to them because I was never exposed to, educated in or indoctrinated in that train of thought as a child or teenager. Had I been told as a young girl who idolized other women and girls that it was "normal" to also feel and want to be physical with them beyond a hug, I might have believed them. I might have cultivated those kinds of thoughts and attractions till I actually became a lesbian in mind and practice. I think one can become what they are encouraged to become if they are pliable enough. And heaven knows there is plenty of encouragement by the LGBT crowd. I'm not saying everyone who identifies as gay or lesbian has been tutored to become that. But with the blatant message out there that whatever goes and there is nothing morally wrong with same sex relations, more people are "becoming " gay or lesbian than would otherwise. I think normal, happy family relationships are pretty messed up and this is another impetus to form abnormal ties. People are afraid of family life. I also don't believe that it's a given that someone with attractions to the same sex and married to someone of the opposite sex will be a prisoner to misery. I do believe that at least a portion of our sexual attractions are taught and learned in society. One can indeed learn to enjoy things they thought they never would, That is one of the reasons among many I am so against gays raising/adopting children. It plants the idea in their head that those actions are completely socially acceptable. The lie that it's OK with God is even perpetuated- making for some really messed up kids when it comes to learning to identify right from wrong as they grow up. I have to agree with others that state anything other than hetero sex is a lie of Satan to destroy humanity, Although those "stirrings", those tingling twitterpated feelings for the same sex occur, they can be played down and ignored and many people with those thoughts can go on to live happy, normal hetero lives marrying and bringing children into the world. That is exactly what Satan doesn't want.
    1 point
  12. I'm curious as to the last quote. What does this mean? Does it mean that western members are leaving the faith? Does it mean that other populations are immigrating? Are members simply dying faster? Does it mean other groups are having more babies? Does it simply mean the growth rate of converts and births in the area is less than the population growth? Some combination?
    1 point
  13. I told one of the psychologists at work that since Dr. Zimbardo's book was such a success, that we should work off the pattern he established. I would forward my sermon notes to him, and he could do a bit of research, and then publish it as the newest greatest psychological discovery. I said I wouldn't even take any pay--though he would have to tithe on any profits. My good doctor friend just smiled. :-)
    1 point
  14. 1 point
  15. Skale...your link has cost me untold hours ;-) Fascinating stuff...thank you!!
    1 point
  16. Only 53% of people raised as a "none" stay so as adults: http://www.pewforum.org/2015/05/12/chapter-2-religious-switching-and-intermarriage/
    1 point
  17. EragonPaolini, I feel for you. Don't berate or belittle yourself over this in your own mind. For what ever reason you're unable to simply let go of this. It's easy for others who don't struggle with it to say, "Just let it go." Intellectually, you already know and would like to do this. But for whatever emotional reasons, you find yourself unable to do so even though you know you should and really want to. Don't beat yourself up over it. Keep close to the Lord and continue to pour out your heart to Him on this. Trust Him. He will nudge you in the right direction on this. Perhaps the persistent nature of this concern belies its seemingly simple solution to "just let it go." There's probably something crucial for you to learn in this painful experience. There has to be a deep-rooted reason for why you can't just shrug this away. Trust in the Lord to help you find it. I don't know how long it will take. What I do know is that the blessings of spouse and family are worth the struggle! Take courage in the words of Mother Eve, who was the first to choose to give up the comfort of the Garden of Eden and trade it for the discomfort of mortality which ultimately made way for and allowed for greater blessings and joy. Also, have you considered asking for a priesthood blessing? Is there a priesthood holder that you trust and could confide in and seek counsel from? The most obvious candidate would probably be your bishop. If that seems too daunting then perhaps you could talk with your Relief Society President first and see what she suggests. As others have already suggested, professional counseling might benefit you. Depending on where you live there may even be LDS professionals that you could counsel with. Please, be prayerful about this as well.
    1 point
  18. My opinion. Yes we should include the Lord in all things. That said, I wouldn't ask God if I should continue to date every girl that I date. You have your own mind. If you are enjoying the relationship, enjoy it. If things come up that are red flags to you and you don't think it would work out, break it off. I just don't think that our Father in Heaven is going to tell us to turn left or right every step of the way. I heard it best on my mission. Tell the Lord what you want. What you would like to happen. Ask for guidance and for understanding. But you don't need to ask the Lord yes or no to everything. His council is what you seek. I am with others that have responded that I do not think that answers to prayers would come with anxiety. My daughter has some pretty severe anxiety and her feelings get inflated 100 times what they should be. If this is any way the same with you, a small doubt to some would seem like a devastating blow to you. If you know those feelings can be out of proportion, I would be leery of them to begin with. The spirit to me is calm, it is clarity.
    1 point
  19. Great topic! This might interest you: http://www.ldsfreedomforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=36747 It's a topic I created on another forum. I thought it would take too much time to copy everything over here so I just linked it. Enjoy!
    1 point
  20. Homosexuality and all explanations, justifications, grievances, and motivations surrounding it are perpetuation of a root lie. It is, flatly, a counterfeit of Satan. And all the twisting in the wind one wants cannot take away from this plain fact. Homosexuality stems from the natural man and therefore any engagement therein, and I mean ANY, makes one an enemy to God. When people buy into this core lie, then all the outlying descriptions of experience, thought and feeling become a half truth at best. This is how most of your posts read to me Soulsearcher. I do not doubt your sincerity or claim you are intentionally misleading. But the argument, at it's very most core, is based on falseness, and ergo, nothing that stems from this falsehood rings quite fully true. Of course, those who have bought into this cannot see it. And I do not expect you to see it. But wickedness never was happiness, and never will be. Should anyone beat a kid up for a friend mentioning the word "gay" (assuming we take your second hand report at face value)? Of course not. Does that mean if this didn't happen, all his friends and family gladly accepted his homosexuality, and that there were no ramifications of judgment or even perceived judgement whatsoever in all the world, that this kid would then be happy in it? No! Of course that doesn't justify vicious hateful behavior. And it never will. But the existence of fringe lack-of-Christianity does not diminish the value and truth of correct, righteous Christianity. It's as if you expect us to believe that without the father's violence the kid wouldn't be touching the drugs and alcohol and everything would be right in his life. As to the "experimenting" idea, you're twisting things to suit an argument. It's been fairly well concluded and accepted that marrying straight to get over the gay is a wrong-headed idea. What we as Christians, and specifically as LDS, are asking everyone, including gays, to experiment upon is righteousness. It is our contention that there is only one path to joy and happiness, and that path is to follow in the footsteps of our Savior and the words He taught and teaches through apostles and prophets. We advocate experimenting upon this -- namely by obedience -- and contend that only in doing so will one become as one should become, and be what one must be. We advocate that obedience will change people's hearts, souls, minds and very beings. We advocate that such "experimentation" will lead to joy, and all other acts, experimental or not, will lead to sorrow. I reiterate: Anything beyond the truths of Christ and His gospel is a perpetuation of a lie. This is a prime example of the only-partial-truth of your posts. This is a small part of the big story, and the fringe extremists on both sides, while perhaps adding fuel to the fire, do not typically drive the overall path of politics. What does happen is the fringe happenings are being exaggerated, blown out of proportion, used as tent poles in the political arena, and made to be seen as mainstream instead of fringe. Moreover, repeating again, homosexuality and all who sustain and support it against the honest exercise of religious liberty are standing with the devil's kingdom against God and perpetuating falsehood. The fact that some few on the side of God's kingdom are mistaken in their approach and tactics does not validate the lie of the other side or justify war against the liberties of all to worship, believe, speak, and act according to their free conscience.
    1 point
  21. I think what Night is trying to say is that if someone needs the Church to help them by paying their electric bill, that frees up funds from their paycheck to buy cigarettes, when they may possibly have been able to pay that particular bill themselves if they didn't smoke.
    1 point
  22. Is it really a misconception, though? I mean, technically, the exact dollars given were not used for the cigarettes, but let's look at this differently: If I have $20, and need to pay an $18 bill, want a $7 pack of cigarettes, and thus borrow $5 from you, is there really any difference between making sure your actual $5 bill and $13 of my money pay the bill, and spending your $5 and $2 of my money on the cigs while using only my money to pay the bill? As someone who has quit smoking more times than I can count, I don't ask for charity until I've given up everything that I can possibly do without in the meantime to do as much as possible for myself. I'd rather take my chances on being able to bum a few smokes to keep from chewing holes in the furniture than ask for food so I can save my money to buy a pack. That said, yes, it is a very tough addiction to break, and I'm certain the bishop can smell that the guy is still smoking. If you want to help the guy, he's obviously pretty deep in the addiction, so why not help him change it? If there's a vape shop nearby, offer to help him get started on the condition that he has to cut the regular cigs down to zero within a month or pay you back every cent of the initial cost. It's been working for me, though slower than I'd hoped; changing the nicotine source is sort of like redirecting a force rather than directly resisting it. Once I've fully moved over to the ecig, I can start buying lower nicotine juice until I'm at zero, and have only a habit, rather than an addiction to break.
    1 point