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Showing content with the highest reputation on 10/05/14 in Posts

  1. Jenamarie

    How to respond

    "Why are you still nursing?" "Because we are." If somebody is being a busybody I don't feel obligated to spell out my life choices to them.
    4 points
  2. Dahlia, I don't think Elder Holland was speaking specifically about the children coming from Mexico, but they are probably included. I think one of the implications of his talk was that we need to be careful not to let the political dogma and dogmatic theology interfere with practical religion. Yes, it is true that the best long term solution for the poor is to get them work and self sufficient. But we need to be more compassionate and empathetic in how we get people there.
    3 points
  3. Jenamarie

    Choir dress

    I actually was pleased that the MEN were allowed to be (slightly) colorful for once. It's always brightly colored women next to men in dark suits and subdued ties. They still had the dark suits, but I loved the brightly colored ties. :)
    3 points
  4. pam

    Choir dress

    I guess I just find it difficult after hearing such wonderful talks to have a thread being picky about the colors the choir wears. Seems just so trivial.
    3 points
  5. dahlia

    Choir dress

    Yes. Yes we are. I don't know why I find their dress so disturbing. I think the colors are flat, there are too many of them, and the women look informal next to the men in suits. It's the same thing when the missionaries sing. The sisters' blouses just strike me as odd and jumbled next to the elders. I didn't even notice the men's ties, I was so wrapped up in the sisters' blouses. I can always find something to complain about.
    3 points
  6. PolarVortex

    How to respond

    I guess I belong to the old school that regards "It's none of your business" as simply waving the red cape before the bull, and I'd like to be a smart matador in conversations. I generally take the Miss Manners approach of smiling graciously and simply pretending a different question was asked, which I gladly answer. But that doesn't always work. I once met a German lady who made harmless small talk with me and then dropped a bombshell question: "I'm a virgin, are you a virgin, too?" I was shocked but regained my composure and replied something like, "My, what an interesting question. Tell me why you are asking it, so that I may answer it more satisfactorily." Turns out her English wasn't very good and she was trying to say, "I'm a Virgo, are you a Virgo, too?" ("Virgin" and "Virgo" are the same word in German.)
    2 points
  7. NeuroTypical

    How to respond

    Just like anything else, if you value the relationship, you have to take things slow and word things carefully and try to foster understanding and mutual respect. And if you don't, well, it's unfortunate that "love thy neighbor" gets in the way of just slapping them.
    2 points
  8. Dravin

    How to respond

    You could always scream at the top of your lungs, "Stop judging me!" and storm out of the room. The questions are sure to stop... of course other ones would probably start.
    2 points
  9. Maureen

    How to respond

    "Why are you still nursing?" I think a good response would be: "Because I want to." M.
    2 points
  10. PolarVortex

    How to respond

    Your use of the word "confession" leads me to think that you're not totally okay with 18 months of nursing, even if nobody had criticized you. If so, I would start dealing with this before I deal with the critics. Can you ask your doctor about this? If your doctor sees no reason to stop nursing, you can simply quote your doctor's approval when dealing with critics, which I think would shut down the debate pretty quickly. I can't count the times I have silenced critics by directly quoting my attorney, or doctor, or some other authority figure. If the criticism bothers you a lot, another approach would be to announce to your family and friends that you're starting to think about a good time to stop nursing and that you're gathering information to help you decide. That might short-circuit a lot of the criticism. Become an expert on the subject and counter criticisms with facts. I spent five seconds on Google and saw that the World Health Organization recommends a mimimum of 2 years of (nonexclusive) nursing, which sort of shocked me. The things I learn on lds.net!
    2 points
  11. kapikui

    How to respond

    You could point out that two and up is common in many, many parts of the world, and doing so in public with no cover at all is pretty common too. You wouldn't believe how often I saw such on my mission. Just because their culture has decided that such is inappropriate doesn't mean that it is. You could also point out that the longer you breast feed, the better the child's immune system is likely to be, and the better the brain development is likely to be as the human fat in the milk goes to build parts of the brain (I forget which ones). You can also point out that due to this brain development, children who are breastfed show on average about 15 points higher IQ than children who are not breastfed. You can also point out that breastmilk is the safest food a child can eat.
    2 points
  12. I will be happy to post a photo Especially if it changes to tattoos.
    2 points
  13. AngelMarvel

    Confession box

    Shhhh.... I secretly want to eat one of Pam's gumdrops.
    2 points
  14. This is mean to be fun, so I'll start. MARY POPPINS was likely Pentecostal. She occasionally operated in the supernatural, and her response to much of life's difficulties was to sing.
    1 point
  15. Palerider

    Palerider

    Hey hey....you be nice too young lady.....Lol
    1 point
  16. Palerider

    Bullying at Church

    I think we see some adults who bully other adults to get their way......in church....my opinion
    1 point
  17. President Monson has drawn on the story of the Bismarck before. I think it must resonate with him, given his own naval experience during World War 2. I've got a confession to make: I didn't really have a testimony of President Monson as a prophet--at least, not in the same sense as President Hinckley. I still had a testimony of Christ, of the restoration, of previous prophets, and of the modern Church, and I trusted that Monson was the Lord's anointed--but honestly, I just couldn't see the mantle. But last night--I can't explain why; but I saw it. God is good.
    1 point
  18. Just_A_Guy

    How to respond

    How about a simple "I just like bugging you" combined with a smile that is equal parts innocence, playfulness, and charm? Or, you could tell them that you're hoping for a modeling gig on the cover of Time magazine (I won't link to the infamous cover I'm thinking of, but I daresay most here are aware of it).
    1 point
  19. I'm really disappointed Roseslipper. I haven't been here in over a year, but I was excited to see your name beginning this topic. I thought that you had found Mr. Right. Side note: the forum looks really different and what's a warning point? It sounds a bit like shingles....
    1 point
  20. carlimac

    Confession box

    I've already eaten two bags of candy corn this season and it's only Oct 4th. #hidesheadinshame #nowondermypantsdontfit
    1 point
  21. classylady

    How to respond

    I agree with the advice given. LaLeche League was a wonderful source of information for me. I don't remember anyone asking me why I still breastfed my babies at 18 months. But, then, beyond family members, I don't think anyone else even knew.
    1 point
  22. My apologies Pam, not you. Got so wrapped up in my response to someone else that I totally forgot that you were the OP. Duh me....I reckon that's why the spirit of contention is so bad...makes one not think straight... At least that's what I'm blaming it on
    1 point
  23. The German joke was a wonderful way to open the speech. As a former Toastmaster with a lot of battle scars in public speaking, I can attest to one cardinal rule of public speaking: if your audience likes you, they will overlook the bad parts of your speech. If they dislike you, they will see only the bad parts of your speech. President Uchtdorf's humble self-ribbing made me like him even more, and I didn't think that was possible. By the way, I was reading his biography and learned that the Church's temple in Frieberg, Germany (dedicated 1983) was the only LDS temple ever built in a communist nation (East Germany).
    1 point
  24. PolarVortex

    Marriage question?

    This "may" end up in marriage? There's your answer. If I were you, I'd focus 100% of my energy on deciding whether or not I really wanted to marry her, and I'd put the temple/civil question onto a back burner. No, I'd take it off the stove completely. The sequence of decisions should be: (1) should we marry? (2) if so, when? and (3) how and where? Sounds to me like (3) has elbowed its way into the front of your queue. You can't make decision (3) wisely without clear answers to (1) and (2). I suspect part of you might be thinking that the marriage may not happen at all if you don't strike while the iron is hot, even if that means you settle for a civil marriage in the short term. If so, I'd urge you to think very carefully about what you're doing. And what's the deal with her waiting 2 months for her baptism? If it's a simple scheduling thing based on her preference for a convenient time, that's one thing. If she's still wrestling with the baptism decision then you should help her clear that up, then take a breath for a few days or weeks, and then start talking with the M-word. Most blunders I see other people make are traced to poorly serialized decisions. Thank you for your missionary service, by the way. I think that's great.
    1 point
  25. Backroads

    Choir dress

    Eh, I've never cared for the women's dress. It's never sightly to wear the same dress rregardless of figure.
    1 point
  26. pam

    Choir dress

    Well I want to say the missionary choir for the Priesthood session has to be the best I've seen. They were so awesome.
    1 point
  27. I pinkpuffyheart LOVED this talk. The whole "Why should we help poor people who are poor because of their own choices?" came up in my Sunday School class recently (I teach the 14-15 year old class, all boys). I pointed them to King Benjamin's address, and how "we're all beggars". And I loved what he said near the end: "I may not be my brother's keeper, but I AM my brother's brother."
    1 point
  28. All the repentance and love that a person has for his ex would not negate the choice of the ex. If takes both parties to agree to being together. If one party does not want to be with the other, in this life or the next, they won't be together.
    1 point
  29. rustedwithlove

    Confession box

    Not sure if this counts as a confession, but... What a great show. :)
    1 point
  30. PolarVortex

    Eternal Families

    I would tend to agree with this, provided we include "failure to work out disagreements like adults" as a sin. I could imagine a marriage in which one spouse wants to save 50% of the household income for retirement and the other spouse wants to save very little but contribute lavishly to charities. There's nothing inherently sinful about this, but it could easily lead to divorce if both spouses refuse to hammer out some compromise. I actually knew a couple like this, and I think their solution was to save hard now but leave everything to charity when both had passed. (There were no kids.)
    1 point
  31. PolarVortex

    Confession box

    Be it therefore known to all nations, races, kindreds, tribes, and tongues that I am hopelessly in love in Judi Dench (formally known as Dame Judith Olivia Dench, CH DBE FRSA) and that I would be overjoyed if I could meet her just one time to thank her for the enjoyment she has given me. And she's a very devoted Christian (Quaker), too. By the way, if your Netflix queue is scraping bottom and you like Britcoms, try "As Time Goes By" (also available on Amazon Prime streaming). Oh, and I have a 2nd confession as well. I am a gentle man, slow to anger and endless in patience... but I totally lose it when I go to a salad bar and get stuck behind some bozo who moves down the line at a glacial pace, uses the tongs to transfer one pea at a time onto the plate, and slowly ponders every vegetable and dressing with more contemplation than I do when buying a new car.
    1 point
  32. We take them off to swim...so wear something else and change.
    1 point
  33. Two missionarys knocked on my parents door in 1970 when they lived in peterborough NH. My father let them in because of how clean cut they were. Who knows how history would have gone, but i am a member of the church today because of how they looked.I am not advocating BYU students dress like missionarys. But the way you dress means something, al least it meant something to my father.
    1 point
  34. No, you're not justified and as Leah said your thoughts are your own responsibility. You mentioned therapy but was it for you to voice your frustration or to understand where your wife may be coming from? Huge difference! There are all sorts of reasons a spouse may be uninterested in physical intimacy: - past trauma (molested/raped), - physical pain, - unsatisfied/unfulfilled sexually (so why bother), - tired, - depressed, - doesn't feel attractive, - been offended (porn...), - personality (some are more interested in sex than others - check library for 'Life Colors' by Pamala Oslie), - etc. Until the root cause is acknowledged/addressed, "a sustained period" doesn't matter. Two questions to consider: ~if she were in an accident that rendered her unable to be intimate, would you feel ok leaving her? ~how would you feel if it was your wife wondering about leaving you because you haven't met her timeline or expectations?
    1 point
  35. Thank God he is unharmed. What a terrifying experience it must have been!
    1 point
  36. Your "bad thoughts" are your choice and responsibility. You cannot shift the blame of your own thoughts or actions to someone else. They are solely YOUR choice responsibility no matter what the circumstances are. If you choose to have those thoughts or choose to act on those thoughts, you are the only one to blame, you cannot shift that blame to someone else. Infidelity is never justified.
    1 point
  37. Why did you marry an abusive man? You said it's been happening your entire marriage which is troubling esspecially because you then new he was abuse and had two subsequent children with him? Did your therapist ask you why you had two children with an abusive individual? From how you've described your husband he sounds like a very shallow person. He also disrepects garments and that is a spiritual red flag. Advice--pack your bags and start the transition to divorce endless he changes behavior. A toxic relationship like that will only hurt your children as well. He needs theraphy and has a lot of unprocessed trauma. Good luck.
    1 point
  38. I think Severus Snape was Wiccan because he practiced magic and lived with witches.
    1 point
  39. What is so hard with following rules? Really. Why is it so difficult for some people to understand that some rules are in place just to see if you will follow them? It's a simple concept called h u m i l i t y..... ...so just shave for crying out loud. It's not like you are being asked to cross the plains again. It blows my mind that so many people freak out over the beard thing but don't seem to give a bleep that our government is openly and blatantly breaking major established constitutional laws. Again, mind blown. (...and yes I had a bad day at work.)
    1 point
  40. Outsider view--lobbying to allow beards at BYU does not seem that substantial, on the surface. However, if successful, administrators probably fear a slippery slope. What will they ask for next? Are we loosening our standards? If that's the fear, I have to wonder what next indeed? There isn't a whole lot that students can lobby for, given the church's strict standards. As for the "take the standards or go elsewhere" line--isn't that a bit dismissive? After all, BYU holds a special place in LDS culture. Graduates likely can expect a certain measure of favor from employers with LDS ties. It is a prestigious school in the greater education world, but an especially prized one for LDS. So, to insist that anyone studying there either stay shaved or transfer out seems harsh. That may be the end result, but is it really the height of rebellion to lobby for permission to wear a beard? I would hope the worse that could happen would not be dishonorable removal from the school, but rather a definitive, "No, we're not changing our standard." Then again, the school might just decide it is time to jettison this particular grooming standard.
    1 point
  41. I've always known you were just sick and twisted.
    1 point
  42. Lusting after and being attracted to are related but not the same. One could be attracted to another because of poise, cooking, financial stability and so forth, while physical attraction is also possible. Physical attraction and lust also differ. As a married man I can notice that women all around me are beautiful, but not connect that to untoward desires or imagining myself with them. For me this is the difference. There is nothing wrong with noticing that another human being is blessed with attractive features, it is when you take that acknowledgement and start coveting or imagining a sexual/romantic relationship that it becomes lustful.
    1 point
  43. You're supposed to tell us why,,,as in "Mufasa was Buddhist because he saw balance and harmony, rather than good and evil. :-)
    1 point
  44. You aren't helping him improve by taking his abuse, either. He might say he won't be changing, you need to say you won't be accepting it.
    1 point
  45. There is a major difference between forgiving someone and allowing them to continue hurting you.
    1 point
  46. SpiritDragon

    My cookie!

    Is that reindeer I hear on the roof? My COOKIE! (and don't you forget it )
    1 point
  47. Seriously. Why are you still married to a guy who has told you he plans on abusing you forever?
    1 point
  48. That's some pretty evil stuff, if you ask me.Yeah. Evil. I said it.
    1 point
  49. The book of revelation says that the two prophets in Jerusalem will preach for 1260 days. Since they don't seem to be preaching yet, we have at least that long.
    1 point
  50. I think I could be a pretty darn good Bishop. Comments and why not bashing about women and the Priesthood starts at 3......2......1.....
    1 point