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"Don't touch where the garment covers" is an old rule of thumb to help return missionaries and others set boundaries for premarital physical affection. The idea is that, in addition to the obvious parts, you really shouldn't be rubbing your girlfriend's thighs or massaging her abdomen. As a rule of thumb, it works well enough, but I personally see nothing wrong with giving a gentle backrub. In any case, to answer your question: It is not any sort of established LDS standard. The bishop is unlikely to be asking about backrubs with your girlfriend. But if she's uncomfortable with it, it's probably best avoided. Might be worth exploring whether your girlfriend is merely super-cautious (which is probably good) or whether she is generally uncomfortable with physical contact (which seems to me very bad).

http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865615543/LDS-women-with-children-now-eligible-for-full-time-seminary-institute-jobs.html I think this is great news. So many women would make excellent seminary and institute teachers but have been unable to due to past policy. SALT LAKE CITY — LDS mothers with children at home are now eligible for full-time employment as teachers in the church's seminary and institute programs. The policy adjustment was presented to staff on Friday, said Chad Webb, the administrator of LDS Seminaries and Institutes of Religion. It quickly generated buzz and excitement among women in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

May be true. Doesn't make it wrong though. Either the thing is askew or the soul's askew. But one's feelings on something doesn't change whether that thing is good or bad. Truth and right is not relative to how we feel about it.

Have you read "The Holy Temple" by Boyd K. Packer? I personally love the book. I agree with others, discuss your concerns with the Bishop, fast, pray and study on it. It seems you have already came to a conclusion on your own, I think it is unfortunate that you have rushed to it. If you believe that Thomas S. Monson is a prophet, how do you reconcile that with your feelings towards temple worship? Read some of his talks regarding the temple. I suspect that what is throwing you, is the highly ritualistic nature of the temple and how it contrasts to our Sunday worship. I personally think that although the temple experience is a much more complex ritual than baptism, the sacrament, and priesthood blessings (did I miss anything?) all of them are equally as "weird" if you pull them out and examine them. Saying a scripted prayer and dunking someone in water then telling them they've been reborn? Saying a scripted prayer, eating bread that represents flesh, drinking water that represents blood? Dribbling oil on someones head and saying a quasi-scripted prayer? All of those things are highly symbolic, the difference is, I suspect, that the symbolism of baptism, sacrament, and priesthood blessings is well explained and culturally normalized, the temple ceremony we are left to interpret the symbolism, so it's not all as clear. I hope you give this all serious thought and prayer, I hope you are brave enough to counsel with your bishop, and your parents. Best of luck to you on your journey.

The church is more than just a nice little church that promotes family values. It is a church that is Christ's church here on the earth. It is the Lord's church that has been restored here upon the earth in the latter days. The church's existence is to save souls and allow each of us to return to our Father in Heaven someday. In order to do that, we must be baptized. And we need the ordinances that are given us in the temple. These ordinances have been given to us by Jesus Christ. They are necessary. Before being sealed in the temple we need to have our endowments. The ordinances received in the temple can be very spiritual, if we allow it to be a spiritual experience. What you did in the temple was not wrong or gross. It was "right". But, you may not have been ready to receive the ordinances. The Gospel, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the restored gospel here upon the earth. The temple is His. The ordinances are His. They are a blessing in the lives of the members that allow us to be families throughout the eternities. The ordinances in the temple allow ourselves and our ancestors to be 'bound' together forever. I find this thought very comforting and spiritual.

I find it interesting that this is the OP's one and only post. Couldn't possibly be a drive-by posting of someone trying to push an agenda now, could it.

You want to talk about riches? As it is today, we have a welfare system that puts the US government's to shame. If we exercised our faith and walked up to our privileges there would be no poor in our stakes. Not only that, but each family would have a such a surplus as to provide for themselves for a year. You want to talk about honor and glory? As it is today, we are at the forefront in matters of family values. So much so, that any symposium on the subject is quite lacking without us. If we exercised our faith and walked up to our privileges, then those who wanted to shake up the traditional stance would no longer argue "you already have marriage and you're not doing such a great job with it; it's time to give us a chance". Such statements would have no teeth because we would be honored with the counter "the Mormons seem to have it right". Instead of talking about ideals, we would be the control group of any study (honor and glory!). You want to talk about power? As it is today, we are already over-represented in politics on both sides of the aisle. Additionally we are in every business under the sun. If we exercised our faith and walked up to our privileges we would see a more moral people through the influence of example and not the power of law. Additionally our businessmen would not be indistinguishable from the businessmen of today. If we exercised our faith and walked up to our privileges we would have Zion and those not of our faith would come flocking, giving us glory and honor, for in Zion there is peace and prosperity.

Words do not seal a person to another. All covenants, contracts, bonds, obligations, not made, entered into, and sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise are of no efficacy or force after the resurrection (see D&C 132:7). A person who has civilly divorced another has not entered into the covenant and so the Holy Spirit cannot ratify that sealing. A covenant not honored is a covenant broken. Now, is the opportunity still open at some future time before the resurrection for the couple to make good on their promise? I believe so. But they must abide the Lord's law of marriage in very deed or they will find themselves separate and alone and will remain singly without exaltation through all eternity.

Question: Revelation speaks of God being the light that illumines heaven. If this is true of the lower kingdoms, then even they will experience an unimaginably better existence. The way I explain it is that compared to heaven, we currently see in gray scale. Those that saw the movie The Giver (or even Pleasantville) will recall when the main character began to see in color. Heaven...perhaps even the Telestial realm, will be like that.

Friend, what denies us our exaltation isn't what we do; it's what those actions lead us to become. We should be becoming the kind of person who wouldn't look; and if we find we're having trouble in that quest--well, that's exactly what the bishop is for. Not to give us absolution; but to coach us in becoming what God wants us to become. Adultery and fornication are definitely so destructive to that quest and hostile to the Spirit, that we need to get help ASAP. Ditto for masturbation and for flat-out pornography. R-rated movies and incidental nudity in popular media is perhaps more of a gray area; but IMHO the fact that you're even asking about this suggests that in your case the Spirit has been sufficiently grieved that a chat with your bishop would be appropriate.

I believe President Young was voicing the same sentiment taught by the ancient Nephite prophet Jacob: And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good—to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted. This looks to me like it's saying that if we walk up to our covenants and desire riches in order to perform good works (and not to buy nice cars or live luxuriously), we will be given riches. Just now, for the first time in my life, it occurs to me that both Jacob and President Young use the plural form, "ye" (or "you"), and not the singular "thou". I had never noticed that before. It makes me think that, perhaps, this is a societal covenant and reward, and not a personal one. We as a people will obtain riches if we live up to our covenants and seek those riches to bless others. I am not and never have been a man of great wealth. I have sometimes wondered if this is a de facto commentary on my state before Christ. Taking at face value the truthfulness of these teachings, I see four possible reasons why I and others like me don't have these riches: We have not yet obtained the requisite hope in Christ. We do not seek riches, either for ourselves or to bless others. As I just now realized, this is perhaps not an individual promise, but a collective promise to the people of God as a whole. The fourth is a personal reason. When I was younger and quite sure that I would make lots of money in my life, I prayed very fervently to God for many years that, if lots of money would harm my children or my marriage, that I not be cursed with it.Now, I personally suspect that my lack of financial success is due to my not playing the game -- or in LDS terminology, not following the laws upon which making lots of money is predicated. It's not one of my gifts, and the ability to make scads of money has never been something I've sought to develop. So I've always sort of defaulted to Reason #2, but a sneaking suspicion that Reason #1 has something to do with it, too. But I grant that it is possible that God heard and answered my prayers as a young husband and father (prayers which I still hold in my heart, even if I never bother to vocalize them any more, given that being a rich man is not a burden I carry). And if that is the case, my heart swells in gratitude to my Father for loving me and my family enough to keep us from the harm and destruction that would otherwise await us.

I'm wondering if this might also fit with LDS bishops in some ways. Here are twenty things I believe are true about most pastors I know. I hope you will work together with your pastor for the good of the gospel! 1. He loves God and you a lot. (Be mindful.) 2. He is a painfully limited human being. (Be realistic.) 3. He probably has a pretty low view of his “performance”. (Be kind.) 4. He wishes he were a better preacher. (Be awake.) 5. He really does want God’s best for you and your family. (Be open-hearted.) 6. His work knows no time or locational boundaries. (Be patient.) 7. He hears much more negative information than positive. (Be encouraging.) 8. He has chosen a vocation in which few remain. (Be praying.) 9. He has chosen a highly leadership-intensive call. (Be lead-able.) 10. He needs help. (Be available.) 11. His God-given vision is bigger than himself and the church. (Be faith-filled.) 12. He wants to personally meet all the needs, but knows he can’t. (Be understanding.) 13. He’s going to say some dumb things every now and then. (Be forgiving.) 14. His family is patient with you, so be patient with them. (Be conscientious.) 15. He is greatly encouraged by your faithfulness. (Be there.) 16. He is passionate for God’s Word to be made practical to you. (Be hungry.) 17. He longs for church to be your spiritual oasis. (Be loving.) 18. He dreams for your and your family’s spiritual health. (Be receptive.) 19. He needs to hear that you prayed for him. (Be interceding.) 20. He’s just a regular guy. (Be real.) http://caryschmidt.com/2014/02/20-things-you-should-know-about-your-pastor/ M.

Not frowned upon at all; just need to keep it in proper perspective. Unfortunately, this isn't a proper venue to explore your concerns here in-depth; but I'd second the advice to discuss your concerns with a bishop or other trusted friend who has been through the temple rite. Because frankly, becoming like Jesus and ultimately being returned to His and the Father's presence after demonstrating obedience, sacrifice, holiness, chastity, and consecration, is (in my view) the entire point of the LDS temple endowment. Also, a hint: The power of the creation tale as told in the temple is in its allegory, not its historocity. Indeed, there are specific parts of the "temple drama" that, per our doctrinal interpretations, cannot have happened (at least, not the way they are shown in the temple). The Church will not spoon-feed you the meanings and applications within that allegory--you have to wrestle with them yourself. Temple learning doesn't come because you watch the video again and again and again. It comes through individual revelations that you receive as you ponder--and occasionally wrestle with--specific elements of the temple rite and try to develop a paradigm with which to approach and interpret it. I won't tell you that you should just bite the bullet and go back to the temple, again and again, until you start "feeling it". Nor will I tell you that you should serve a mission in your present state of doubt. But I will tell you that you might want to consider that there may be additional layers to the temple rite that you're missing, but that provide deep insight and spiritual strength to other members. What you want to do with that information, is your own business. But, here's an example: Archaeological digs at Megiddo have yielded what appear to be long-handled incense spoons, dating to the period of the first Jewish Temple. The exterior of these spoons are adorned with carvings of human hands . . . in cupping shape. (Pics . . . look at the first three pics of the second row--these are from other sites in ancient Israel.) Whatever you decide to do--I sincerely wish you the best of luck. It's hard to have a family expecting things you don't think you can deliver . . .

Really? Teaching and learning (the ingraining of knowledge) is what you consider brainwashing? I cannot think of a way to respond to this that isn't mean...so I'll just drop it. But it is an offensive term. It's condescending and flippant concerning things that are highly personal and highly sacred to a great many people, including me.

is it? I didn't find it offensive, sounds like one persons opinion which I am in favor of talking about if it merits discussion. Going to the temple is just another step in the indoctrination process, (some will interpret this or take it the wrong way I say it as a statement of fact and as one who is fully indoctrinated) which if you are BIC starts very early. In response to the OP there is no shame in declining to go on your mission or putting it off until your testimony is stronger, and no shame in letting your leaders know about your experience and seeking help and further understanding about the covenants made and the obligations that are now expected of you as an endowed member.

In 3rd Nephi 19:9, it has always impressed me "And they did pray for that which they most desired; and they desired that the Holy Ghost should be given unto them." IMO, if we have the Holy Ghost, we will know what to pray for. If we are meant to have riches, if we are close enough to the Spirit, I believe we will know that is what we should pray for. And, I do believe we will be given that which we ask. Currently, by America's standards, I would suppose that my husband and I are living in poverty. When reading where the poverty level of income is, we certainly qualify. We nearly lost our home to foreclosure, and for all intents and purposes, we probably should have had our house foreclosed on. But, we got a letter from our mortgage company telling us that we qualify for a reduction in our mortgage payment. For us, that means the difference between being homeless and having a roof over our heads. Our prayers had been that if possible, to please allow us to stay in our home. Our prayers were answered. And, I truly believe it is because we have paid our tithing. It does not mean that it will be easy to make our mortgage payment. After our house payment, we only have $200 dollars to pay all other bills, food, utilities, etc. But, this reduction in mortgage, and a time frame to pay our mortgage payments on time allows us to find employment. It means we still have a roof over our heads (at least for the time being). I believe that my husband and I are rich. We have the gospel. And, not only do we have the gospel, but we have strong testimonies of the gospel. That knowledge, IMO, makes us richer than most in the world.

Using your "swimsuit model" touching her to the tops of the thighs would be okey-dokey. Not such a great idea if you are trying to follow the law of chastity. She has set a limit for herself using garments as the guideline. That still leaves plenty of the body outside those boundaries, so to speak. If the guy can't respect her wish to not be touched by a boyfriend on the bare skin of certain parts of her body, then he need to decide what is more important to him - physical contact with someone he is dating (that she does not wish to have) or respecting his girlfriend. And, no, the girlfriend setting these particular boundaries does NOT mean she has a "problem" or that the sexual intimacy in a marriage with her is doomed.....as some like to jump to that conclusion. They are dating. They are not engaged. He's not endowed. Nothing wrong with her being sensible about things. She's an endowed member of the church, not a "try it before you buy it" member of the Kardashian world.

Not how I feel, but I love it anyway. Plus, the sentiment from my childhood. :)

I agree. Not something you tell someone who is now struggling with a testimony.

This is an extremely offensive thing to say on an lds forum. It's also ridiculous nonsense.

I commented on your Welcome post and won't try and digest the long post here. I love Anatess. She is always on the mark as far as I am concerned. Ditto her. I do think it interesting you recognize the failability of man but don't forgive the priest who offended your grandmother (you). The Catholic church is huge and has issues with leaders trying to envoke their own belief - hence a cardinal was just demoted by the Pope. Spend ten minutes searching out the "bad" of the LDS faith and you may never look back. Yet I am a 30 year convert member, happy as can be in my faith. Last comment, Arizona and Utah Mormons (some Californian) have a unique culture. You'll find a different level of acceptance out in the "mission field", where many more Mormons live.

You are not alone. I felt much the same way. I wasn't headed on a mission but was getting married the next day. Fortunately, my future husband felt the same way and we worked on it together. Your parents will understand. Your Bishop will understand. If they don't, they aren't inline with others I have heard. One thing that might help, and others may say it, is go back to the temple. Eventhough it might seem like it is brainwashing you (and it is), it is where you will get the inspiration about WHY the rites are important. Don't be afraid to talk to others. You may find people like me. Honestly, I would still go on the mission. There is so much there to learn. There is so much more to that service than just converting others. It is the Spirit that will convert others. Your job is just to teach. If I were your parent (and I am a parent), I would also support you not going. Life is long. You don't have to take this all in at once. Message me if you want a private conversation.

Sorry for your loss Eowyn. When my BIL passed away years ago, many posters here posted some lovely poems, here's one: Death is nothing at all Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away into the next room. I am I and you are you, Whatever we were to each other, that we still are. Call me by my old familiar name, Speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference in your tone, wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow, laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Pray smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without effort, without the trace of a shadow in it. Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same as it ever was. There is unbroken continuity, why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you somewhere very near just around the corner. All is well by Henry Scott Holland M.

You seem like a very bright guy. I was reading your story, and I thought "He could really use this insight", and in the very next paragraph was that exact insight. This happened not once, but many times. You've obviously put a lot of high quality thought into this. Hopefully we can add some more fuel to the fire. As you touched on, people are very fallible. Those snobby families at the drive through can be Catholic, Mormon, atheist, or many other things. We all suffer from weakness and have a long history of screw-ups. One of the things *everyone* needs to work on is not judging others in their imperfect actions. You seem to have reflected on this quite a bit already. If you do go to a Mormon church (or anywhere else), I can guarantee you that at least 1 person of the 300 there will be struggling with judging others and will sin by judging you as a person because you're gay. I would ask you to forgive said person for his sin against you, and not let the weakness of that man to keep you from God. Mormonism is founded on the principle of each individual talking to God directly, to get to know Him that way. Bow you heart down, invite Christ into your life, read His words, and listen to what He answers to your prayers. Your relationship with God involves exactly two people: you and God. You're worried about using yourself. I understand that 300% (I've felt the same way). Now, let's take a moment to step back and ask: who are you? Are you defined by by your love of coffee? Of course not! If all the world's coffee were to vanish, you would continue to be the exact same person you've always been. No, you are you! An intrinsically valuable human being, not defined by any actions-- in fact you would be just as valuable if you suddenly went into a coma and could do nothing the rest of your life. So, if your worth doesn't come from your deeds, where does it come from? You are a child of God!! That's where your value comes from!!! The Master of the Universe, the Creator of all: you're His SON!!! I'm not talking about being "adopted" by God because you've been a good boy, no-- you are His SON because you are of His spiritual flesh and blood-- an offspring of His own nature!! The heart that beats, the mind that thinks, the will to choose, the soul that loves: you are HIS SON!! The Father has loved your for eons before you ever came to this world, a love deeper than you could ever comprehend. His love, your value, goes far beyond mortal understanding. Please, come to the Father, and let Him tell you how much He loves you. It's not because of any actions He loves you. Now, that being said He does want you to do good things: just like any earthly father would want you to do good things . He wants you to be safe, to be close to him, to love those around you, and to grow into the best person you can be. Because of that yes, He does ask us some things: like don't kill anyone . Somethings just make a better world for all of God's children. And yes, Mormons will put "don't drink coffee" on the list of things you shouldn't do cause they're bad for you. But remember, God doesn't define your worth on coffee consumption, instead it's a recommendation to help you grow to be a better person. It's just like my friend who's working on anger-management: her temper doesn't define her worth, but mastering it will enable her to be a much better person, and more like the God she's loves so much. She's learning to define herself not by her actions (i.e. yelling), but to define herself a beautiful beloved daughter of God. On a side note: if you haven't already, I'd recommend checking out the official stance of the Mormon church on gays at http://mormonsandgays.org.

Welcome. I appreciate any person exploring faith. You will find acceptance by many Mormons, but you may also perceive a lot of conflict when trying to reconcile us with other faiths. For instance, the statement of knowing God loves you regardless of sin. Yes, He does. That is part of our faith. However, "sin" separates you from God/Spirit. To take this further, if YOU perceive your homosexuality as sin, then you will not find acceptance in the Church so long as you willing practice "sin". If you feel you are same-sex-attracted because of genetic disposition and unable to reconcile a hetro lifestyle, you will find acceptance. There is little tolerance for those who simply want to "explore" sexually or have an agenda of seeking acceptance for a free "lifestyle". There is little cultural acceptance in the Church for anyone willing sinning. It doesn't matter what the sin is. For instance, members perceive adultery, drinking, smoking, and porn as sin. Willing participating in those sins will NOT keep you from participating in meetings and classes, but it will keep you from holding a calling or going to the temple. In our Mormon culture, we hold callings and we strive to be worthy for the temple. People not worthy to participate are still loved and welcomed, but in the perceptions of culture, they are on the fringe. Mormons bind culturally by our participation in callings. We bind by serving each other. I don't want to make this a rant. I hope to set some expectation for you as to what you will encounter if you make your sexual orentation the focus of your exploration of the Church. You setting your username as you did tells us that is what is most important about you. I hope you will expore other aspects of your faith and relationship with God, while hanging out with us. Bless you.

What does any of that have to do with "Self"? Certainly we lose ourselves to find ourselves but we still retain our individuality and our distinctness. You can't have it both ways where our Heavenly Father delights in variety but desires an outcome where we are a hive mind. Here is a great talk on the subject - https://www.lds.org/ensign/1976/06/eternal-principles-of-government-a-theological-approach?lang=eng We need to be careful about how we speak of these things. Like Elder Maxwell is here - https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1995/10/swallowed-up-in-the-will-of-the-father?lang=eng

I read your long post quite carefully because it was so interesting. I seemed to detect an air of urgency in your comments, as if you need to decide something soon or else horrible things will happen. They won't. Humans often fall into the trap of thinking that a decision must be made immediately, that it's a black-and-white decision, that it's a dilemma, and that if they choose the wrong path then there's no going back. Maybe some decisions are like that, such a decision to donate a kidney to a relative, but they are few and far between. Slow down. I have found that many decisions sort of decide themselves if I just keep learning and gathering data. If you feel drawn to the LDS Church, by all means investigate further. Just go to church and listen and observe and learn. Nobody will put a gun to your head and demand that you either get baptized or get lost. I think the decision before you now is, "Should I learn more?" and not "Is the LDS Church the true path to inner solace?" Some part of you may be uncomfortable with how tentative this makes your life for the coming months or years, but learning to find peace in uncertainty and tentativeness is a good skill to learn and will serve you well. Good grief, I was an investigator off and on over a 10-year period before I finally got baptized. And don't misinterpret my next comment, but I think it's a mistake to compartmentalize yourself permanently as gay. You may feel that way now, but your whole life is ahead of you. I'm not suggesting that you try to alter your orientation. Statistically speaking, people who self-identify as homosexual in their youth continue to self-identify as homosexual for the rest of their lives, and that's okay if you do, too. However, I have hundreds of business contacts along the California coast, and I've noticed a change over the last decade where a few older gays release themselves from strict categorization as gay and allow themselves to feel sexual attraction wherever it occurs. Most remain predominantly gay, but I know several people who started self-identifying as bisexual after decades of being totally gay. One friend left his same-sex partner and married a woman. He is a rare exception, and I am not in any way telling you that you need to change. I'm just advising you to be open to change in every aspect of your life, and to follow the changes that benefit you. Be happy. Better to have a long unexplored journey before you than to be chained by the side of the road.

Just remember that God is Love, as well as being just and merciful. if an individual is going to become like Him perfectly they will gain those attributes in their nature. If polygamy is required it won't be an issue for those who are able to attain such attributes. If it's not required then that is fine too.

Extreme caution on your girlfriends part, and quite frankly a little weird. There is no "rule" that says you cannot touch where the garments cover, heck they sell garments that go to your ankles if you want them. Before you take your relationship to the next level (marriage) a frank and open discussion needs to be had about intimacy and boundaries.

​Fundamentally it comes down to how you identify yourself, if you define yourself by the things conversion requires and counsels of you to discontinue then I can see how one could feel, "I'd lose myself." If one identifies oneself by other qualities it's less of an issue. Mormonism would ask you to discontinue some things, but it also asks you to identify yourself not by your sins (within a Mormon context) but by your virtues and potential. If Mormonism, and Christianity in general, are what they claim to be then one should in a sense lose themselves and find a better self (Matthew 16:24-26 and all that). Indeed, one can make the argument that such is the sole goal.

Silhouette - "Released Time" is when it's part of the school day. Since it's a religion course, the kids are 'released' from school for a 'time' in order to participate. As far as a small stipend for those that teach the 'early morning' version, my friend was given something like $50 to cover copies, visual aids, donuts, whatever. Let's just say that hardly covered what was needed.

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. The only thing I can tell you with certainty is that you will have good days and bad days ahead as you confront the reality of this situation. Focus on the good days and don't be discouraged by the bad ones. An aunt of mine (not LDS) just passed away from lung cancer, but she smoked. The only thing I learned is that every medical case is unique and that unexpected things can happen. My aunt got her diagnosis and was given only a few months to live, but she lived another 2.5 years. Amazingly, she lived by herself independently in a big house, with some help from her children and church friends (like grocery shopping and mowing the lawn), and except for occasional fatigue her quality of life was not really that bad. Actually, it wasn't the cancer that killed her. She went out on her porch to smoke a cigarette and slipped and fell and got banged up really bad, and she passed away a few days later. I really didn't know how to handle my aunt, because I really loved her. I finally just decided to spend as much time as possible with her and focus on daily activities. That seemed to be the best strategy, because when she finally passed my grief was very manageable. I didn't even go to the funeral. She lived two time zones away and I decided I would spend all my travel time visiting her while she was still alive. Do not worry about the nature of your own passing. Matthew 6:34 says, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." I like the KJV even better: "Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." Your RS friends will be able to help you most if you are totally honest about what you need. Work on staying connected to the people around you, because that will be a source of strength to you. Finally, I must say that I have hit several points in my life where I thought everything was lost and hopeless. It wasn't. Not by a long shot. Your husband's medical condition certainly is stressful and sad, and your life will probably change a lot. Be open to the possibility that this change may not be as hard as you might think now, and that your own life may still have many wonderful things ahead. As I have said in other posts here, being strong in the face of adversity is one of God's greatest gifts. It will bless you, your husband, and everyone around you. Wishing you strength for your journey. Don't walk it alone.

Atheist for sure. Members of my family have been in various churches, and so far only the LDS Church actually feels right. My family's been members of the Methodist, Episcopalian, Baptist, Catholic, and a number of other churches. No offense to anyone, but I just never felt comfortable till I found the LDS. And that's even with my family all turning on me!

When determining if you must speak with your bishop, and have questions, please refer to this quote: ""First, those in sin must confess. “By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins--behold, he will confess them and forsake them.” (D&C 58:43.) That confession must be made first to the person who has been most wronged by your acts. A sincere confession is not merely admitting guilt after the proof is already in evidence. If you have offended many persons openly, your acknowledgment is to be made openly and before those whom you have offended that you might show your shame and humility and willingness to receive a merited rebuke. If your act is secret and has resulted in injury to no one but yourself, your confession should be in secret, that your Heavenly Father who hears in secret may reward you openly. Acts that may affect your standing in the Church, or your right to privileges or advancement in the Church, are to be promptly confessed to the bishop whom the Lord has appointed as a shepherd over every flock and whom the Lord has commissioned to be a common judge in Israel" (President Harold B. Lee, "Successful Sinners," July Ensign 1971)."

I didn't know about this site either. Thank you for sharing that. I am going to talk with him about approaching others. Maybe finding some other women in my ward in my same situation would help alot too.

I took it, but I'm a man, so my answers won't count anyway. :)

After reading the questions I didn't take the survey. It was misleading.

One of the blessings of living the Word of Wisdom is that I don't spray coffee all over my screen when reading a post like this.

Being repetitive doesn't necessarily mean it has any less significance to us. We shouldn't say the same prayer with no feeling, but just because you change some words up doesn't mean it is not in vain. You could say what sounds like a heart felt prayer and it may really mean nothing to you in your heart. I would state it not as repetitive being the issue, but rather lip service being the problem. If you don't in deed feel grateful for the food or the blessings, then it is repetitive and in vain. Your heart is what decides, I think. I try to add in specific people to ask a blessing for in my prayers for food. That seem to mix it up and reminds us that we truly should be grateful for what we have.

Seeing the Bishop aside, what else are you doing to spiritually improve yourself after this?

Unfortunately, some members associate wealth ( in the worldly sense) with some form or level of righteous lds living. Perhaps a look at the top 500 listed companies and who started them may help adjust that thinking. Sadly to some, there simply is no pin code to Zion's bank disclosed to members who freshly come forth from the waters of baptism. If anything the scriptures paint a different story. " Christ said foxes have holes and birds nest but the son of man hath nowhere to lay his head". Peter replied on the steps of the temple. " silver and gold have I none" and Amulek who did have wealth and status lost it all when accepting his call to peach the Gospel with Alma. Perhaps as so one else alluded to here that if God did grant unto us an abundance of wealth we too like the prodigal would squander it away loosing both it and ourselves in the very act. Like most conversations around lds members and money the young rich man from the scriptures makes a cameo right on cue for his usual public trial of who not to be like. What they fail to see is this story has very little to do with money, and more to do with giving up that which keeps us from following Christ. Unfortunately for him it was money, but for us it could be a buffett of different vices. Some people grow up despising money, too many lessons on money being the root of all evil or talks on " you can' t take it with you has left a psychological scar which see money fall through their fingers easily. While they would like more of it they no longer prioritse it over spiritual things. They spend a great deal of mental energy balancing the guilt line between the tree of life and the great and spacious building. Some refuse or have never learn't the principles for both obtaining, retaining and multiplying money that the children of this generation may have learnt making them wiser than the children of light as recorded in the parable. Perhaps the most sad comparison to money and members is that obtained to righteousness. Yep that money is often associated with position in the church. This type of flawed thinking is often rolled out in the same sentance like. Did you know the new stake president is the CEO of a mining company? Church leaders have addressed this already. I knew a Bishop who was in finance when the GFC hit and was out of work for 6 months while serving as a Bishop in a large ward. He never complained, never murmured and never counted his blessings by the number of coins in his possession.

In my mind I like to think of myself as wealthy.....with all that I have been blessed with I consider myself a wealthy man. What more could I ask for. My wife and I enjoy our jobs. We have four awesome kids. We have 3 son in laws and one daughter in law. We also have 4 grandchildren. All kidding aside I am very serious. That's my 2 cents worth.

If you interpret "hanging out" in a way other than wasting time chatting about meaningless drivel, sure. Hanging out can be part of bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of others. This is not what I meant by "hanging out" though. Clearly -- because we're talking about two folk hanging out in lower kingdoms, wherein they've already lost their eternal life, and hanging out won't improve that situation. Hanging out, in such a case, cannot be viewed as a means to true joy. True joy will not exist anywhere except in the highest degree of the Celestial Kingdom. Your idea of eternal life is strange. We are not Borg. Resistance is futile.

Over here, hearts are counted as 'offal'. They are tasty and nutritious, like liver and kidneys, but more akin to ordinary meat, being muscle. I eat them because they are far cheaper than prime cuts, and because no animal is killed for them, as they would be for, say, prime rib of beef, or shank of lamb. It eases my conscience to eat something that might otherwise be wasted, or go to pet food. Nevertheless, they are not vital to the recipe. Go with the enthusiasm, and substitute whatever you can get, and appeals. Best wishes, 2RM.

Heart is some tasty meat, it was one of my favorite things about moose hunting (the hunters got to enjoy themselves some heart and tongue). I don't think I've seen heart for sale outside of some fairly large international marts (and I don't trust the meat department at the one nearest me), though I suppose a real butcher could get their hands on some for you.

OK, so here's what I'm cooking tonight, to use up some stuff in the fridge that needed eating. It's cheap, wholesome and all cooks slowly in one half gallon pot, so should be pretty straightforward even for a newbie chef. And there won't be much washing up. 2RM's hearty, meaty, winter stew. Serves six. Loads of chopped onions; say 4 good sized ones. Half bunch of celery. Some cooking oil - I use sunflower. 3 Ox hearts, chopped. 12 Sausages. Not sure you guys have british bangers, but any cooking sausage would do. 680g. Cooking bacon, diced. Again, not sure you guys have it, but any diced (ideally smoked) pork would be fine. 125g. 2 x 400g tins of tomatoes. 1 x 400g tin of beans - butter, flageolet, haricot, whatever. Just not baked! 1 cup pearl barley. A good shaking of dried oregano. optional extras: worcestershire sauce, tabasco sauce, chilli powder, etc. Method: Add the oil to the pot. On a medium heat, fry the onion and celery til tanslucent. Add the meat, and fry some more, stirring every so often. Maybe 5 minutes, til brown. Add the tomatoes, beans, pearl barley, oregano, turn up the heat some and bring to the boil. Turn down the heat to low, put a lid on the pot, and simmer gently for an hour, til everything is tender. Keep an eye on it, stir every so often and add boiling water or beef stock to keep everything covered by liquid if you need to. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Then you're done. Serve with boiled rice, or boiled potatoes, or just in a bowl with fresh bread. Over here, it all costs about £1.00 per serving, say $1.50 in your money. When I've eaten about half of it, I'll probably stretch it for a few more meals by adding a good sized turnip and a swede, diced small, and cooking again. Hope you try it; hope you like it. Best wishes, 2RM.

I can't speak to mainline Christianity; but my read of Hebrews 11 is that the answer to your question is "no".

If I were not LDS I would almost certainly be atheist, or possibly agnostic. The LDS church is what has helped me find faith in God in the first place.

I want to change my answer to this ^.

What's the name of Isaac's second wife?